lol mystery condom

Give me stories.

guy asked me for one, told him i didnt have any, actually didnt have any

Ew, was it full of lol?

lol creme?

All is full of lol.

The caper kinda went down like this. One of my roommates (we'll call him Matt) found it while emptying the garbages in the house and immediately blames me (he's laughing). I know damn well it wasn't mine (in a way, this is unfortunate), which only leaves one roommate who we thought would conceivably do it in the bathroom, we'll call him Jeffrey, who was in his bedroom with his girlfriend. Matt starts yelling, "JEFFREY YOU GET OUT HERE!!", and I join in, "BAD JEFFREY! BAD!" Matt continues, pounding on his door, "YOU GET OUT HERE AND YOU TAKE A LOOK AT SOMETHING!" And so on. Jeffrey comes out, shirtless (this is the same gastric bypass goth phase roommate I talked about in another thread). Matt leads him to the bathroom yelling "YOU GO IN THERE AND LOOK AT WHAT YOU'VE DONE! AND YOU CLEAN IT UP AND YOU WIPE DOWN THAT WALL!" Etc. (We're all laughing, it's not some awkward, tense moment.) Jeffrey totally denies sticking it to the wall, but admits throwing it away in there. Later, quite suspiciously, even denies that.
Later the 4th roommate comes home, we'll call him Stewart because that's his name and he posts here on occasion (BigLurks). He of course denies it and says "I can promise you I have never once thrown a condom away in the bathroom." And we believe that because it's a believable story coming from him. But where from here?

Will the riddle remain unsolved? Will it ever be revealed who made scroggin' in the toilet? Only time will tell.

Or it won't.

My husband's sister lives at home and sleeps in his old bedroom unless we're there visiting. The last time we went to visit his folks we found a used condom in his bed. Not pleasant esp for him who likes would prefer not to be reminded that baby sister has sex even if she's 27.

There's another story from maybe three or four years prior involving the same toilet and some lol mystery semen. But I'm off for now.

Not a bad one (xpost), I want more of these.

Preferably more MYSTERIOUS

there was a condom, tied into a knot, on the sidewalk last night.
didn't get a close enough look to tell if it was used.

(not mysterious.)

why don't you all jizz into a cup and then find out by smell whose jizz was in the condom?

(seperate cups, obv)

Solve the mystery, a little male bonding, not bad.

i didn't suggest bondage but whatever floats your load

"it took me about twice as long as anyone else, mostly through fear of being struck by another's jet, being as i was in the centre of the three"

immediately embarassed, now relieved and really really scared. I've heard the bed creak, man.... like it or not, I'm a witness.

We've all heard the bed creeeeek Emily, it's the only noise they make.
That I've heard anyway.

they seem to creak louder and like death when you're in the next room to jeffrey..

Poor thing. You must have nightmares.

Really though, it weirds me out more that they're otherwise totally silent, like they're only doing it out of some religious obligation. (except that's obviously not it)

coney island whitefish

FACT: Jeffrey once wrote a song that was SO. FUCKING. SAD.

saw a condom in a drinking fountain at high school once - I expected it belonged to either those sketchy, hairy-eyed kids from the other side of the track field who have only in-school girlfriends, or the athletic director involved in several independent cases of sexual deviance with both students and teachers..
I remember things about high school, but mostly I don't like to.

"sketchy, hairy-eyed kids from the other side of the track field who have only in-school girlfriends"

Brendan was one of those kids at West.

This is slowly becoming the lol Mankato thread...

If Hastings can have one, I guess that's okay, though.

Mankato is "all mystery dirty used condoms, all the time" and very little else

and all Taco Bell - Baja Blast
Mully's "guy-with-hole-in-his-throat-singing-What-a-Wonderful-World-at karaoke-night"
river dweller brandy-snatchers

and us, the 20-something screwballs watching Henri Chopin in the dark

Jaswant Rai Speciality Hospital, Meerut, India.

A 27-year-old lady presented with persistent cough, sputum and fever for the preceding six months. Inspite of trials with antibiotics and anti-tuberculosis treatment for the preceeding four months, her symptoms did not improve. A subsequent chest radiograph showed non-homogeneous collapse-consolidation of right upper lobe. Videobronchoscopy revealed an inverted bag like structure in right upper lobe bronchus and rigid bronchoscopic removal with biopsy forceps confirmed the presence of a condom. Detailed retrospective history also confirmed accidental inhalation of the condom during fellatio.

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/14870871

Solved question paper

This thread is completely crazy and I offer no excuse for any of this at all. ILX has finally gone TOO FAR.

And I'm playing Bowie/Eno's "Low" so fuck you.

Also someone in chatz said something earlier tonight about "inhaling a condom" and I don't bloody approve of that, either.

too far damn it
too bimbleing far