BeanBoozled: Jelly Belly fucks with their fans

Pencil shavings smell lovely, that flavour must be delish.

Some of these flavors were in the Harry Potter Jelly Bellys. I tasted the vomit and the pepper ones. Yuck.

ew, coconut.

I had something like these (the "bad" ones) a few years ago. I think they were marketed for halloween. And yes, they were awful.

Buttered Popcorn is a real one & awful

Why the fuck would you buy this?

I remember the grass one tasking like grass. Vomit, while bad, didn't actually taste like vomit.

I want the smell of marker pens as a jelly bean flavour. Or just some weird chemically flavour that doesn't even exist in nature called "original".

Whiney = no longer in touch with inner child

WE CAN PUT A MAN ON THE MOON, BUT I CAN'T GET A FUCKING JELLY BEAN THAT TASTES LIKE VOMIT?!

vomit is a feeling, not a flavor.

Whiney = no longer in touch with inner child

-- nabisco, Monday, April 14, 2008 4:42 PM (27 seconds ago) Bookmark Link

Also, I Jon-Benet Ramsayed my inner child soon after moving to New York.

Too soon

"naturally and artificially flavoured".

I don't think I want to know which are the natural flavors :|

Yeah I got given a little box of the Harry Potter ones. The ones that were a flavour of something you'd actually eat, like sausage, were more WTF than things like 'ear wax' which pretty much tasted of nondescript chemicals

"Nondescript chemicals" is my fave food group.

Jelly Belly is actually SUBVERTING THE MESSAGE OF MASS PRODUCED CHEMICALS FROM INSIDE THE CANDY!

Laugh, and all of you have fallen for it like the fascists you are!

<rik>

A friend tried to get me to eat one of the Harry Potter jellybeans. I demurred, but he insisted, so I selected what I thought would be the least offensive flavor: black pepper. It actually wasn't bad at all.

i like how they were smart enough to include 'juicy pear' in that lineup cuz goddamn that beans always seemed like a con to me. ive nearly gagged on it multiple times + it looks exactly like some other far better flavor

wtf juicy pear is delicious. it's the inclusion of coconut, buttered popcorn, and licorice as 'real', desirable flavors that I have to question.

Yeah the popcorn JBs are disgusting, and I love popcorn.

Crack shrimp

i love the popcorn ones. especially if you half-and-half a bag with sizzling cinnamon.

Why the fuck would you buy this?

― Whiney G. Weingarten, Monday, April 14, 2008 4:40 PM (10 months ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

OK, I bought this.

New question is, "Why the fuck would you buy this TWICE?"

I'll will report back to you guys on my findings.

1. Toothpaste - Tastes like toothpaste. So what? So does toothpaste and I put that in my mouth every day!

2. Skunk spray - Tastes like skunk spray. Gagged. Considered throwing the whole fucking box out.

3. Black Pepper - Actually has pepper in it, so it crunches a little. Actually tastes pretty good, would eat again.

i'm terrified of getting the vomit one. Relieved that it was just peach.

CAUTION
These jelly beans may look alike but they could not taste more different from each other. Think you can tell them apart?
WE DARE YOU!

fwiw, toothpaste is totes obv

4. Booger - Tastes like nothing really. What does a booger even taste like?

5. Rotten Egg - Ugh gross, guys.

6. Baby Wipes - Tastes like perfume.

Silverfish - actually tastes like centipedes
Divine's Armpit - does taste like Divine's armpit
Hamburger Grease - tastes like hamburger grease -- needs salt
Polo by Ralph Lauren - tastes more like Hai Karate amirite