13 Year Old Steals Dads Credit Card To Buy Hookers

I don't know how to reconcile my baseline disapproval of this type of thing with the fact that young Ralph Hardy is the greatest young man of his generation.

You disapprove of him playing xbox with hookers instead of shagging them?

Between this and the epilepsy hackers story I'm beginning to question my sense of morality.

who plays ralph hardy in the movie?

EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS STORY IS AMAZING.

I disapprove of him stealing his dad's credit card but everything he did with it was awesome.

"They told the suspicious working girls they were people of restricted growth working with a traveling circus, and as State law does not allow those with disabilities to be discriminated against they had no right to refuse them."

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I disapprove of him not screwing the hookers but everything he did with it was awesome.

This reminds me of when Larry David picks up a prostitute solely so he can use the car pool lane.

The last sentence goes into the 'amazing final detail' category.

EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS STORY IS AMAZING.

-- Matt DC, Monday, May 12, 2008 8:35 AM (5 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

He'll be the best politician ever! "I've done it all, I'm no hypocrite!"

This is about as close to a real life version of the plot of 'wierd science' as you can get.

I don't know which line from the story is my favourite.

Wish I had done this as a poll now

Prediction: this thread gets revived about ten or twelve presidential elections from now.

in... 400 years?

Try again.

So who stars in the biopic?

michael cera

ah yes. no math when rolling out of bed

btw:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:The_Wire_Templeton.jpg

What was that one movie called? About a decade old and featured a tart with a heart of gold taking a early-teens boy under her wing and teaching him the facts of like, except NOT LIKE THAT

please say "the facts of like" wasn't a typo because that's an awesome phrase

Oliver?

Was thinking the same thing (xpost).

How did they rack up 30 Gs? Did they buy a boat or what?

Make that plural.

"Asked why he ordered two escorts, Ralph said he thought it was the thing to do when you win a "World of Warcraft" tournament. "

blame it on videogames

DJ Mencap, you're thinking of Milk Money

This is outstanding.

http://www.midwaysailor.com/military/salute.jpg

http://www.ls1gto.com/forums/image.php?u=2094&dateline=1151896145
single tear

This story has to be fabricated. Also, movie in question: My Tutor?

I CHOOSE TO BELIEVE IT

http://data1.blog.de/blog/k/kalpeakatsastaja/img/i%20want%20to%20believe.jpg

just gotta chime in with further thumbs-up for:

They told the suspicious working girls they were people of restricted growth working with a traveling circus, and as State law does not allow those with disabilities to be discriminated against they had no right to refuse them.

followed closely by:

The $1,000 a night girls sensing something up played "Halo" on the Xbox with the kids, instead of selling their sexual services.

Milk Money (lol typed Mink Money then, I'm on a roll) is the one, ta

Ralph's ambition is to one day become a politician.

Prostitution isn't legal in Texas, is it?

I've got a soft spot for this:

whom after delivering supplies of Dr Pepper, Fritos and Oreos had been asked by the kids where they could score some chicks and were willing to pay.

I don't think so, HI DERE

They explained they had just made a big score at a "World of Warcraft" tournament and wanted to get some relaxation.

lol

hard day at the office!!!

Ralph had reportedly told police that his father wouldn't mind, as it was his birthday last week and he had forgot to get him a present. The father, a lawyer said he had been too busy, but would take him on a surprise trip to Disneyland instead.

"Surprise" trip to "Disneyland".

The escort girls who were released without charge, told the arresting officers something was up when the kids said they would rather play Xbox than get down to business.

story started out awesome, ends with ;_;s

I love this: Asked why he ordered two escorts, Ralph said he thought it was the thing to do when you win a "World of Warcraft" tournament.

The hookers were just to make the rest of the story more believable!

hey guys i dont wanna ruin the party but this is a pretty lame fake article

im sure youre all shocked that the journalistic standards of www.money.co.uk have stooped to making up parody news

ethan is like the poopinest partier ever no wonder he doesn't get invited anywhere.

http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/516V9YBNDHL._SL500_AA280_.jpg

http://allvintagestore.com/Young%20Adult%20pic/hardy%20boys%20midngiht.jpg

hardy boys bout to get arrested for cruising that park

http://img2.timeinc.net/ew/dynamic/imgs/031124/155226__tom12_l.jpg

ethan do you also go find youtubes of criss angel and write FAKE a bunch of times

Outside of movies and (fair enough, funny) fake articles, can you actually "order" stuff delivered to your room at a motel? Call up the desk and say "we need Fritos and hookers, stat!"?

America is an amazing place.

http://www.nydailynews.com/img/2007/09/06/gal_vegas1.jpg

It is a common piece of knowledge that you can ask bellboys about hooker acquisition off-the-record.

No, I know - hookers are old hat. I was more fascinated by the Fritos! Wouldn't a bellboy just say "um, there's a 7/11 around the corner..."

The article says that the desk clerk DELIVERED Frito's to their room!

(i.e. the point my tinfoil hat came out while reading the article)

the bellman probably just handed them to the hookers when they got there and told them to bring 'em up.

I suppose it's possible that they played the "people of restricted growth" card to secure corn chip delivery.

Outside of movies and (fair enough, funny) fake articles, can you actually "order" stuff delivered to your room at a motel? Call up the desk and say "we need Fritos and hookers, stat!"?

-- Savannah Smiles, Monday, May 12, 2008 11:39 AM (41 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

Yeah, that's kind of one of the things the concierge at a nice hotel can do. Hookers, you usually have to tip extra for.

paying hot chixors to come over & play video games for a few hours sounds like a good business model.

circa 1990, anyway.

It is a common piece of knowledge that you can ask bellboys about hooker acquisition off-the-record.

-- HI DERE, Monday, 12 May 2008 17:13 (1 hour ago) Link

this is true!

i read the second sentence i read the last sentence whatever is in between can not possibly improve upon them

what about cocaine acquisition, hoos

deeznuts, that means you missed this sentence: They told the suspicious working girls they were people of restricted growth working with a traveling circus, and as State law does not allow those with disabilities to be discriminated against they had no right to refuse them.

holy shit ty

as a canadian, i'm to understand the best method is to march into the nearest park wearing a sandwich-board reading "i wish to procure some illicit narcotics. have wads of ca$h."

xpost to cutty

however - how one puts yah in one's father's visa i do not know.

http://img2.timeinc.net/ew/dynamic/imgs/021203/1660__whitney_l.jpg

WHER ARE TEH RECEIPTS??????? SHOW ME THEM

hoax

http://blogoscoped.com/archive/2008-05-22-n16.html

yeah we kinda figured that out eventually

Google’s Matt Cutts makes a statement

ILX's Matt Cutts makes a post about cocaine

I prefer to live in a reality where this happened.

OTM

luckily we discussed it here where no one made any money

hmph. still, respect to whoever made up the story, 'cos it's a) awesome and b) pretty much believable.

It's one of those things that doesn't at all matter to me if it's fake or not because it is so perfect that it's basically true, to me.

It's perfect, perfect, perfect either way. If something makes my heart completely soar, its reality is only negligibly important.

True even with little stuff. I once heard that every member of Devo are the same height-- Is it true? I dunno, but either way what an neat rumor. Gets a smile out of me. la la-la.

Abbott otm. I'm happily agape that the story's delivery clerk instead of

a) saying "now listen here young men, you'll all have to wait a bit for that kind of thing now eat your oreos" and calling Authorities

or

b) saying "sure boss", turning blind eye + washing hands

chose the course of

c) actually giving the info before calling Authorities!

It's one of those things that doesn't at all matter to me if it's fake or not because it is so perfect that it's basically true, to me.

-- Abbott, Friday, May 23, 2008 7:56 PM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Link

this is how you people got into iraq.

like i bet bush said that exact same thing.

wait, they have hookers and X-Box in Iraq?????

MY POSITION ON THE WAR HAS CHANGED

so that's what they're all doing over there!!

There should still be a film made anyway!