you've been left behind

Our purpose is to get one last message to the lost, at a time, when they might just be willing to hear it for the first and last time.
Programmed and run by Christians, for Christians

Annual re-subscription fees will drop proportionally to the number of subscribers
Messages sent out 6 days after the rapture
You can edit your documents and the recipients any time
Your sensitive documents are stored encrypted

Haha, I was just thinking about trying to find a way to make money of "rapture ready" Christians. The best I could come up with was a t-shirt with a battery that said "RAPTUREREADY" instead of "EVERREADY" on a battery or flashlight. And maybe there would be a little cross instead of a lightning bolt.

Also they'd probably lynch me when they found out some money-grubbing atheist jewboy was trying to make money off them.

this is strange!

dude it's only $40 a year! and it decreases after that with increased subscriptions! total bargain!

that's not bad

20 i'd be sold. 40 it's like almost an eighth

you can't put a price on rapture

i love the bullet points on the site. it's very clear.

Um none of the links work. For me, anyway.

I mean MAYBE it's all the satan in my blood, but that is fake.

Document storage and "Rapture" triggered email messaging system.
Store up to 250mb of documents
Send to up to 62 individual email addresses
150Mb encrypted document storage
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You can edit documents any time
Write your own documents or choose from some of ours

Services Overview
We have set up a system to send documents by the email, to the addresses you provide, 6 days after the "Rapture" of the Church. This occurs when 3 of our 5 team members scattered around the U.S fail to log in over a 3 day period. Another 3 days are given to fail safe any false triggering of the system.

Look out, mods. They have figured out the email.

If 60% of ILX posters could actually go six days without posting I'd really believe the rapture was here

i've been left behind by the night

it's f'kn getting light outside

shit

thats like super failsafe tho cuz theyre assuming that 2 of their own 5 team members are satanic! these guys are really taking every precaution

I like those cars w/bumper stickers that say: "In Case of Rapture, Please Take Car." I'm like, "Fine with me."

Which 60%?

lazy image zing...
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/e/e4/Blondie_-_Rapture_%28UK%29.jpg

not lazy enough..
http://images.amazon.com/images/P/B0000BZNNI.01._SCMZZZZZZZ_.jpg

What, you can give yourself to Jesus AFTER the Rapture and still ascend to heaven or whatever it is? That's totally what I'm going to do if it turns out to be true, no need to bother with any of it now.

http://www.raptureready.com/faq/rap23.html

I'm learning all sorts of interesting (read completely batshit insane) stuff at that site.

Who knew?

Well, you can, but you've got to go through at least the first seven years of tribulation, probably die a martyr at the hands of the New World Order through some brutal means.

Oh man, rapture mythology is so fuckin' fun, second only to post-nuclear apocalypse shit in my book.

xpost

http://www.raptureready.com/faq/faq134.html

Is the devil working overtime?

^^^ Sounds like a line from a blues song. Unlike most employers, at least the devil pays overtime.

"You will hear of wars and rumors of wars ... Nation will rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom. There will be famines and earthquakes in various places" (Matt. 24:6-7).

Wow that Matt dude nailed it.

I knew this was an and what thread

http://www.theholylandexperience.com/

Holy shit.

Do christians need to vote?
http://www.raptureready.com/faq/faq26.html

What if fewer Christians and Bush supporters had visited the polls? We would have President Al Gore. But, on the other hand, what if more Christians had voted in that election? We would have had much less turmoil and George Bush would have had a lot more support right from the beginning.

Al "Satan" Gore, eh?

Literally! (xpost!)

More info on the creator of the rapture ready site:

http://www.raptureready.com/photo/myworld/rap83c.html

Now I understand why he wants to be raptured: he just wants to get away from that place & that godless friend.

ahaha ripping piss out of his retarded nephews

http://www.satansrapture.com/obama.htm !

http://www.theholylandexperience.com/indexfeature_2006apr1.jpg

roffles at depicted "i'm always with you" 3D jesus

xpost haha Stan, that's brilliant.

"It is my belief that the Biblical Tribulation will start between 2008 and 2012 AD. (99.999 sure). "

Great stuff.

did you ever wonder what happened to the program...

http://antipas.net/twibp_logo.jpg

http://antipas.net/cool_twibp.htm

Tribulation - 1999 - 97 Minutes

One evening, police detective Tom Canboro (Gary Busey) finds himself battling more than thieves and thugs as he becomes entangled in the activities of an underground group who possess frightening psychic powers. As these powers are unleashed upon his family, Tom rushes to the rescue of his wife (Sheri Miller), his sister (Margot Kidder) and his brother-in-law (Howie Mandel). Before he can reach them however, a mysterious force takes control of his car and rushes him headlong into an oncoming truck.There is nothing but blackness. Tom wakes up -- years later -- in a hospital bed. As he staggers to consciousness, he finds himself in a world unlike anything he could have ever imagined. Is the devil really running the world, or is Tom still lying in that bed, with all of this nothing more than a creation of his badly damaged brain?

http://www.amazon.com/Apocalypse-III-Tribulation-Gary-Busey/dp/B000051S4V

(this one's my favorite of what I've seen of the Cloud 10 pictures. It's post-Rapture and secret police randomly track down anyone who hasn't accepted the Mark -- if they find you, they slap Virtual Reality goggle helmets on you, which whisk you into the Matrix to be confronted by the Antichrist himself, who torments you with bad CGI until you either accept the Mark or are driven insane)

Two things:
1.Imagine how taken back they will be by the millions of missing Christians
Does this mean that I can FINALLY find a free church to throw a rave in? I'm hoping yes.
2."WHY" is one last chance to bring them to Christ and snatch them from the flames!
Is this about gay people?

Imagine how taken back they will be by the millions of missing Christians
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/9/99/Christians_-_The_Christians_CD_album_cover.jpg
Lazy image zing #2...

I like those cars w/bumper stickers that say: "In Case of Rapture, Please Take Car." I'm like, "Fine with me."

-- Abbott, Thursday, June 5, 2008 12:01 AM (18 hours ago) Bookmark Link

"Oh shit sorry dude I thought you were raptured lol!"

I saw a Second City-type sketch-comedy group a few weeks ago do a live game-show skit called "Second Cummings" in which the audience was shown film clips with stilted dialogue and bad lighting and had to guess whether each one was from an end-times drama or a softcore porn movie.

I'm realizing now that Rapture Christianity basically = the housing bubble. "Get in now - you may not get another chance!"

People in Philly watch out!!!!!!!

http://www.satansrapture.com/philacode.htm

Oh wait it was in May...phew...close one.

I was just going to post that link, holy shit.

IT IS AS GOD INTENDS

BIBLE CODE UPDATE: MAY 27 08: In The Philadelphia Code, I found something very strange, "668" is encoded (9x) with "THE DAY", MISSILE" & "IN THE MORNING". Is "668" a code for a date, 6-06-08 as there is no zero in Hebrew? I also found "POSTPONED UNTIL JUNE" which clearly points to JUNE, 6-6-08.

We'll we'll see what happens in 25 minutes when Greenwich Mean hits midnight.

Cld also be June 6, 80,000 B.C. by their reasoning, tho.

There is much evidence that on MAY 9,2008 Canadian Police stopped and Quarantined two passenger cars on a train heading towards NYC and PHiladelphia. Seven passengers were sick with Flu-Like symptoms from a "mystery illness". The next day the new story was, "the older women who died had a different (unnamed) illness from the other six passengers who were sick from a different (unnamed) illness. DO YOU BELIEVE THIS STORY?

BIBLE CODE = PHASE I -
PLAGUE - PREVENTED

DJ Martian ^

I'm having fun reading that last bit as Fall lyrics-uh.