Crap advice, ie, "if you trip over in the street, just pretend that you were breakdancing"

So what is the most plainly wrong and rubbish bit of advice that you've ever been given, along the lines of the thread title? Something that is so gargantuanly fuckwittedly wrong you can't believe that it was suggested. Or maybe you believed that it was good advice until the moment you tried it out?

/me walks into lamppost
everyone else laughs
some guy: "you fuckin' idiot"
me: "er, I meant to do that, I was just breakdancing!"
everyone else laughs even harder...