Liverpool won't be on dis ting 2008/09

Sylvian Disting

Charity shield on Sunday, Him staying at Man U, Villa swoop for big-faced Boro fullback and craggy, Andy Rourke looking Reading fullback in time to mount charge for 8th, Man City probably don't actually have any £££, Joey Barton possibly not gracing yr screen anytime too soon -

FOOTBALL

Sylvan Distin was not on "Dis Ting" when he was told by a police officer that he would have to cancel his holiday to testify at Joey Barton's assault trial, and responded by bursting out laughing

Q: WHY DID YOU CHOOSE TO SIGN FOR STOKE WHEN THERE WERE OTHER CLUBS INTERESTED IN YOU?

A: It was no secret that other clubs were in for me. But it would have been hugely disrespectful to Reading for me to leave there and then sit on the bench somewhere all next season. I've come to a team that have told me I will get 38 games of Premier League football.

Q: SO THE CHANCE OF REGULAR FIRST TEAM WAS A MAJOR FACTOR IN YOUR DECISION?

A: I came here to Stoke and Tony (Pulis) made it clear I was his number one target and he was going to do everything he could to get me. I want to play 38 games and I believe I can do that here at Stoke.

Q: HOW CONFIDENT ARE YOU THAT YOU WILL SCORE GOALS AT CITY?

A: If I get the service I can score goals but I've never set myself targets in my life before a season. If you can get one in two (games) you are on the level and so far in my career it has been there or there abouts. Goalscoring is something I have and if you're lucky enough to have it, you revel in it. I love being a striker. There's nothing better than putting the ball in the net. Aside from the joy in the stands, it gives you an amazing buzz.

Q: WHAT DO YOU THINK ARE STOKE'S CHANCES OF STAYING UP?

A: It's going to be hard, very difficult, but as a newly-promoted team what you do have in your locker is the fact you're an unknown quantity and you have to utilise that and play to your strengths. We can't get near Manchester United in terms of spending, but how much do they know about us?

Q: WHAT WOULD YOUR ADVICE BE TO THOSE STOKE PLAYERS WHO HAVE NEVER PLAYED IN THE PREMIERSHIP BEFORE?

A: Don't be intimidated, there's nothing to be frightened of because you're just playing against 11 different people that you haven't played before. They're still just people. If you go out there and you are in awe, then you'll get turned over. We have to use being an unknown quantity to our advantage. It's there for the taking, we just have to grasp it.

Q: I SUPPOSE YOU WILL WANT STOKE TO MAKE A SIMILAR IMPACT TO THE ONE READING MADE IN THEIR FIRST SEASON IN THE TOP FLIGHT?

A: None of us at Reading had any experience when we went up and we finished eighth simply because nobody there had any money or reputation, so the only thing we could do was work hard for each other and do the best we could, which we did. It may have raised an eyebrow amongst some that I came to Stoke, who are a club like Reading when they came up, but I want to play in the Premier League.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/football/7546968.stm

Everton FC's favourite Young Conservative lookalike referee suspended over debts

Tottenham run the risk of becoming a feeder club if they grant Dimitar Berbatov his dream move to Manchester United.

That is the verdict of Spurs legend Chris Waddle, who is appalled by the behaviour of the Bulgarian striker for wanting a transfer two years into a four-year contract.

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/sport/football/article1525302.ece

This could be our last season without QPR, so let's make the best of it

What have you done!?!?!?!? Have you no sense of tradition? This thread has had the same name every season since 1908.

Ferg's the Leigh Genesis of ILX threads.

If a joke's worth making once, it's worth making a thousand times.

(xpost)

perhaps changing the other thread to "hartlepool won't win the premiership" or something will appease the old timers.

http://lighthousepatriotjournal.files.wordpress.com/2008/02/change-obama.jpg

I am the Richard Scudamore of ILX

can I just say it here then: TONIGHT WE DINE IN HULL

Lou1s Jagger, ladies and gentlemen

I'll be the Danny Baker of the 08/09 Premiership thread.

I'll be the Hylda Baker of the 08/09 Premiership thread.

http://bp1.blogger.com/_YvDCrB8xy-s/R_Ip4Q3MQ2I/AAAAAAAAAlc/hj9jQBDxm9I/s320/barack-obama-bw.png

the audacity of lolz: thoughts on reclaiming the ilx dream

I don't believe in this change. what is 'Dis Ting' supposed to signify? Do any of you pampered wired-up white boys actually talk like that? I think this thread should be boycotted.

lol at black people

Pinefox is the Graham Taylor of ILX

http://www.cwn.org.uk/skyblues/empics/managers/emp-ron-atkinson-458719-400x300.jpg

http://www.myperspectiva.com/login/wp-content/image-uploads/2006/09/DPsmall.jpg

"Siss-ocko hacking away like a savage there alongside the more cultured Gerrard and Alonso"

Pleat looks like a real boozebag there

http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y148/Juror8/logobama.jpg

YES WE CAN

jimmybullardfistbump.jpg

I think Graham Taylor is OK, and that his reputation has somewhat recovered in some ways.

I don't think it makes you progressive on ethnic issues or race relations to think it's funny to write 'Dis Ting' on the internet, especially when you're a comfortable, technologically advantaged white man who spends his time coming up with snide things to say about the British media.

Most of us are boozebags, by this point.

pinefox i think you might need lessons in context

http://www4.ncsu.edu/~kacollin/images/HeadInHands.jpg

xp

OK, go ahead - what's the first lesson?

the first lesson is that you google "Ashley-Paul Robinson"

note that the quotation marks are necessary lest you wind up with an england match report circa 2004-2007

the second lesson is that the premiership thread-title is not attempting to make britain a better place

hi, pinefox

"Liverpool won't be on dis ting" was a humorous allusion by r/t/c to an intemperate Facebook status update made by the Crystal Palace player Ashley-Paul Robinson regarding a possible transfer to Fulham; this caught the football thread posters' imaginations for a while, and the thread title was felt to be a good way of giving a nod to that while providing a slightly more modern twist on the traditional Liverpool-baiting Premiership thread title. I don't think it's such a big issue really, and it was certainly not intended as any kind of badge of racial progressiveness.

All joking aside, Graham Taylor is a good man.

Most of us are boozebags, by this point.

Maybe, but I don't look like David Pleat... yet

http://www.thewe.cc/thewei/_/images11/us_terror_state/obama_clinton.jpe

yeah you may need to buy some regaine before that prospect becomes feasible xpost

Thanks for your helpfully informative post, MPx4A.

What does 'Liverpool won't be on Dis Ting' actually mean? Liverpool won't be in the Premiership? Liverpool won't be mentioned on the thread? It doesn't seem a very suggestive statement to me.

Personally I probably look worse than David Pleat, by this point.

http://www.bebo.com/Profile.jsp?MemberId=4670678808

number one google result for "on dis ting", which contains a disgracefully inflammatory anti-American image

S.V.M
CAW U BOIIS THINK YOUR LYKE TONI MONTANNA AND TING BWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOYYYYYY

I think in this context it implies that Liverpool will not be taking their opportunity to win the Premier League in 2008

Dom's gonna turn the "Street Disciplez" logo into an ILX meme, I can feel it comin'

pretty sure hating America is already a thing round here son

the link: I don't get it. And I don't like the look of that page or the culture that it seems to represent.

Why do you people find this kind of talk (as in the capitalized post above) so hilarious?

And I don't like the look of that page or the culture that it seems to represent.

THINGS GONNA TURN NASTY

Roger Adultrey RIP

i think why PWUWBs find this kind of pronunciation funny (enough to meme-up) is worth exploring

probably not on a thread intended for premier league banter tho

I blame these thread titles everyrime Liverpool finish the inevitable 4th.

"I don’t think Arsenal have got any finance."

"I don’t know who it is, but I think there’s someone on the board who’s not pro-Arsene. I don’t know who it is, but that’s what I’ve heard."

Incredibly, Adams claimed he wanted to quit Portsmouth before Harry Redknapp left earlier in the season because he wanted to go for other jobs - including West Ham - and feared the worst for the Fratton Park club.

Adams said: “Portsmouth’s finances are dire, they’re in a bad place"

“I’m a tracksuit manager and I want to get back in, but maybe it’ll be at Championship level, taking a team up rather than down."

Pondering whether to start an official Tony Adams Rehab-Watch thread or keep it in here.

What was 'Tell Me Ma' all about though?

Tell me ma, me ma, I don't want no tea, no tea, I'm going to Wembley...

Oh, the times I sang it and I did want my tea and I didn't go to Wembley.

So is Hargreaves ever going to play again? Will he be the new Rosicky or the new Ledley King?

17 million well spent, anyway.

Ah, I didn't realise it had been turned into a semi-official Cup final song with verses about the Cup run and that. That's pretty goofy.

xxp

http://images.mirror.co.uk/upl/m4/feb2009/3/7/57F978DD-E599-E38E-64E92E45A70907D3.jpg

http://www.bobpitch.com/anon/Mocha__38456651_tony_hancock300.jpg

and now...

Wim Jansen: I Have Not Recommended Tony Adams To Celtic - Goal.com
http://bit.ly/HIUVn

what was tony adams thinking?, he wouldn't be a candidate to manage Partick Thistle reserves or Queen's Park fc as a manager in the Scottish Football League Third Division in Glasgow

http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2009/jun/03/english-premier-league-debt

The manager Phil Brown's impromptu karaoke after City scraped Premier League survival, which means around £25m extra in TV money alone next season

must be some singer

He's recording an album with Susan Boyle I believe.

'Ironically ... wrong word'

haha YES this was the best bit.

uh but much as i wanna keep the gag going, everything tone's saying in that mirror report is pretty sane? ok the SOMEONE HATES ARSENE bit is a touch sensationalised but still not altogether unlikely - boardroom relationship's clearly not hunky dory now is it.

ps. yep this is me trying to appease the gods having just realised he might get given the qpr job

nominating danny sturridge for mercenary xi btw - amazed he seems to have escaped furious national stick somehow.

what's young sturridge done?

if reports are to be believed he's turned his nose up at £45k a week and is holding out for a more reasonable £75k.

£45k is slave wages, ask Ashley Cole.

if it's the new going rate at the club, then why not? he seems a good young player, if they want to keep him and play him then lash it in there. if not, then he's as well to call their bluff now and force a transfer.

Isn't Sturridge saying he'd also like a guarantee he'll be played, which is not an unreasonable argument to make for any young City player.

It betrays a lack of confidence in your own ability to ask to be guaranteed a game rather than think you can be selected on merit. If you don't think you're good enough to keep yourself in a mid table premier league team you shouldn't really be asking for £75k a week.

no, it betrays a lack of confidence in your manager's confidence in your ability.

You think he'll get that guarantee at Chelsea? Any manager worth his salt firmly states that no player is guaranteed a game.

Newcastle are in the Championship now, maybe Adams could go there and bring them back up

ps. yep this is me trying to appease the gods having just realised he might get given the qpr job

Lol Jim Magilton.

Ok, maybe I worded it badly. It must be in the minds of every young player at City that they could get forgotten. Their academy is one of the best in the country but why care about that? They nearly bought a player in January for about a £100m like it was no thing. Players who need first team experience to turn potential into greatness can't compete with that.

I agree with that if you're talking about impressive kids that have yet to feature in the first team but I think that if you offer a 19-year-old £50k a week you are telling him he's part of your plans.

I guess so. But he's been starting rubbish like Caicedo ahead of him - before they go buy Eto'o or Tevez or Darren Bent or whoever their big summer signings are.

"Sure you are part of our plans Dan. It's just, at the moment, you can understand that Darius Vassell deserves more playing time, yeah?"

i'm more making the point that the wages are irrelevant to city, it's well within their scope now to offer 50k a week and never play the kid. i'm also pretty sure he's not asking for a guaranteed place, but does want some kind of assurances that he's going to get a fair crack of the whip.

having seen him in a few games last season (mainly against blackburn, where he set up robinho beautifully) i'm pretty sure he's premier league standard. if he's not going to be in or around the first team then he should be looking to move. if he is, then 75k is what city are paying.

when football officially goes on holiday, i think i might poll http://www.101greatgoals.com/2009/06/the-101-greatest-goals-of-20082009/

But until then, the ones really worth seeing:
http://www.101greatgoals.com/videodisplay/2630634/
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aoLg-Uzio8o
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DgVu_Y-Np3Q
http://www.101greatgoals.com/videodisplay/1733196/
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g_3A7nf9TRY

They're talking about Chelsea signing him on 75k. Crazy, he's not the next Rooney. He's the next Defoe at best. If Chelsea weren't interested, he wouldn't get more than 50k anywhere else surely.

Given the right circumstances I think he could become one of the best strikers going but of course being pulled between Citeh and Chelsea doesn't seem exactly right for him. The few times I've seen him he's reminded me of Drogba when he's not being a plonker. (Of course playing week in week out is a lot different to when he's had a good game and been given a bit of time on the 3rd last MOTD game or whatever).

Another amazing goal I think was covered in the Europe thread:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yZoHBlsMe5I

i wonder what defoe would be paid upon moving to chelsea, or city.

My friend and I agreed that the Gourcuff goal was by a good stretch the best of 08-09

befoer you saw demebele's tho, right?

I only watched 1 - 50, there are probably a few that are just as good in the list.

dembele's involves some extremely not-trying defenders and an existing 3-0 scoreline tho

and that anderson goal was a keeping calamity

Gourcaff goal like one young joe cole scored against United in title-winning game of 2006.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ly1nUJgBffs

Also couldn't be bothered posting Premiership goals you've already seen or the 50 great Zlatan ones.

That Dembele goal is like something from Masters six-a-side, but in a good way.

My favourite goal/non-Arshavin-moment of the season was Bobby Zamora's strike & celebration against West Brom in February, but I don't see that in your highlight reels

"My client can kick a ball into a skip from quite far away" - English football off-season and transfer speculation thread 2009

Probably worth going from here from now on, as this thread is massive now.

this thread too massive to go down imo

http://cache.daylife.com/imageserve/0css6Rc1Lj5gY/610x.jpg

lock it, now

Done.