discovering a JUG OF PEE in your new bedroom: C or D

http://i24.tinypic.com/295wfu9.gif

weren't you moving away or something?

without internet access?

Yeah, I thought it was going to be a few weeks longer w/o it but they got hooked up pretty quick.

That's me in the new bedroom up top there...

Internet access AND a jug of pee thrown in, what you complaining about man?

OK, stories about this.

Used to share a house that only had one toilet, which was in the bathroom. One housemate is in the bathroom taking a shower, another housemate is outside banging on the door saying "hurry up, I desperately need a piss!!!". Anyway, I'm in my room, getting ready to go out, and my door is closed, so I can only hear all this, not see it. A few minutes later, I'm ready to leave. Housemate-in-desperate-need-of-a-slash is nowhere to be seen. I walk into the kitchen, and on the side is a pint glass full to the brim of piss. Housemate-who-was-showering comes downstairs, and we both look at the glass going "wtf? is that what it looks like?". When we disposed of that glass and it's contents we handled it like radioactive waste.

Another story... A friend was at a party at someone's house, and crashed there overnight, along with a number of other people. In the morning he wakes up to this horrendous smell. Tracing the stench to the kitchen, he finds a saucepan on the stove, with the gas lit underneath it, full of boiling piss.

I've considered the logistics of peeing into a pint glass on numerous occasions and my fear is always "what if I need to pee more than a pint?"

Over a pint is a lot to pee... I think... I don't know actually, I've never measured

I did wonder at the time that it was an amazing co-incidence that he managed to piss exactly a pint.

We did, er, take the piss out of him for a long while afterwards "fancy a pint?", etc., etc..

Guy who lived on my corridor last year of uni had a pint-glass which he used as a cum receptacle.

My thoughts are thus; when I do a big thick heavy piss, I'm sure my piss pisses pretty much as fast as a lager pump (I worked in a pub for years); how long does it take a lager pump to fill a pint glass? How long is this piss going to take?

IT'S JUST NOT WORTH PISS ON THE FLOOR AND HANDS

http://www.diegolaxia.com/Project2/avid.JPG
big thick heavy piss

Guy who lived on my corridor last year of uni had a pint-glass which he used as a cum receptacle.

-- Just got offed, Friday, 15 August 2008 10:20 (37 minutes ago) Link

How did everyone find out about that one?

Once, when I was living in the dorms, a friend of mine could hear his roommate masturbating quite obviously from the top bunk. After a few minutes of this a t-shirt comes twirling down to the floor and he says, "don't touch that shirt."

Niiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiice.

Man that dude was gross. Had a toothbrush and tube of toothpaste he never once opened, would just masturbate in front of people like he didn't know they were there, showered maybe once every two weeks....eventually he got kicked out for drinking openly in the hallway and threatening the RA. Talk about a nightmare roommate.

When did you room with George W. Bush?

x to thread to tell the "throat cancer wine bottle" story (a couple minutes in):

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OZ7sM_YcsiU

hahaha, no *I* didn't room with him, he was at the end of the hall with this guy Tony. My roommate was from the United Arab Emirates and I had to go through a great deal of culture shock with him. B.O. was as bad but I actually liked him, unlike this other scum.

people who don't use deodorant vs people who use way too much?

people who don't shower vs. people who do but own literally two pairs of socks that they don't wash ever.

(and also they sweat a lot)

obvious classic

Was it a hot jug or a cold jug? And which would you prefer?

... warm rather than hot, of course

It's gonna be warm, innit.

Lol no, thank god, it was cold. But definitely urine. :(

(J0hn otm, btw)

Was the jug served with ice and a slice?

I wonder if I can trick anyone into drinking it.

I just realized the gif of me shaking my head looks like an anti-drinking message.

Which I guess it is!

Before I can judge C or D I need to know.. are you sure it isn't yours?

the answer to that wouldn't really affect its C or D status though :/

Well, it kind of shifts from "C or D" to "C or LOLC"

Pardon me for sharing this only tangentially related anecdote: chemistry teacher in high school has the brilliant idea of having our class bring in jars of our urine to test the pH. On appointed day we all shuffle in sheepishly with our jars demurely out of open view in brown paper bags. One notorious wag pulls his out in the open, proceeds to unscrew the cap of the jar and quaff the contents - apple juice, of course, but for a few seconds the room was palpably horrified.

GUYS I FOUND ANOTHER OOOOOONNNEEEEEE

worst easter egg hunt ever

Fucking excellent, good on him.

Is this the point where I mention the Eno urine tale?

The one where he was watching TV? Go on then...

Maybe Eno stayed in yr house

In Brian Eno’s snapshot diary / autobiography, A Year With Swollen Appendices, there is a legendary entry for 26 August 1995: "Pissed into an empty wine bottle so I could continue watching Monty Python, and suddenly thought, 'I've never tasted my own piss,' so I drank a little. It looked just like Orvieto Classico and tasted of nearly nothing."

http://i267.photobucket.com/albums/ii317/RabitesAngelatin/IMG_0673.jpg

:(

What did he expect? "It tasted of strawberries and newly mown hay!"

xpost

(xxxpost) just tried to work up some kind of "Eno on the piss" joke... I failed

RabiesAngentleman, count your blessings; at least your not finding baggies of shit all over the place.

piss > dasani

oh man, that piss looks... fermented... or something

THAT'S ANOTHER STORY (xxp)

http://www.memefirst.com/dasanisite.jpg

Waking up to wizz sucks, but most of the time I can get back to sleep. My problem is it takes me such an awfully long time to get to sleep in the first place, probably an hour or so, and by the time I'm beginning to fall asleep I realize I'm in desperate need of of an enormous piss. Then it's another hour...it's really that first time that gets me.

Our house fortunately doesn't smell xp

Even my room is ok, he capped 'em tight.

snoball's pic upthread of that redheaded eyeball motherfucker sucks me in in the most horrifying way. every time.

Waking up to wee is OK, but going downstairs, thru 2 rooms, then upstairs again really would wake me the hell up.

Once or twice, my GF managed to use the bottle (w/o spilling), which was totally goddamned amazing.

Worst doctor experience of my life - having to pee in a jug for 24 hours and then take it back up for testing (something-something levels in my kidney)s. Only to hear back that the tests were inconclusive and they'd like to just draw a little blood instead, it'll do the same thing.

WHY THE FUCK DID YOU MAKE ME PEE IN A JUG, ASSHOLES?

Discovering a JUGGALO in yr new bedroom: C/D?

(xxxpost) It was a response to something Scik Mouthy posted earlier, try GVS'ing for "Avid Merrion" (that's the redheaded guys name), it'll make a bit more sense then...

haha, it's not sense/lack of sense that sucks me in, its that damn FACE

lib--your gf let you keep a piss jug by the bed? you must have one raunchy/wonderful/horrible/i dont know what woman in your life.

she even used it, bravo. what an adventurer.

A friend of mine once ended up at a friend's house after a night of drinking and had to take a shit but her roommate was in the shower. So he found a giant metal salad bowl and used that, but then didn't know what to do with it so he hid it on the balcony. But then the roommate went onto the balcony so he had to fake someone knocking on the door and dump the into into the apartment complex courtyard below and sneak the bowl back inside to wash it out. The next night they invited him over for dinner and he had to fess up when he refused to eat salad out of the bowl he had shit in.

I just gotta say, Rabies, I saw this thread seven hours ago. But I've still got tears of laughter in my eyes right now because of that James van der Beek crying gif. What a punchline to the thread title!
It is on my harddrive and etched in my mind, and I will forever love it to death.

When I was a caregiver in a group home, I used to work with a schizophrenic guy who had a tendency to pee in jars/cups and leave them in his room. I had to go in there and kindof remind him to get rid of them. He was a very cool and funny guy, though.

at least he had an excuse

Haha, thanks, I thought it was pretty choice too (xxp) :)

And here I thought a photo a Jim Beam bottle filled with actual human urine would have been the more striking image .

Rabies, that was long ago. I'm married to a woman now who'd murderalize me if I tried that.

DIVORCE

Also the bathroom is on the same floor as the bedroom now.

Chamberpots C/D?

if you do this in a moving vehicle the resulting bottle of pee is known as a "trucker bomb" iirc

my pee pee head is too big to fit in most drinks. needs to at least be a snapple

I need to use an empty magnum bottle of champagne - both for the width of the neck and the liquid capacity...

i need to use a pickle jar

I would need one of those Hefty ForceFlex® bags.

I need to take a dump in a dumpster.

people who don't use deodorant vs people who use way too much?

-- snoball, Friday, August 15, 2008 11:43 AM (9 hours ago) Bookmark Link

Wait! Too much deodorant can be used? Do you mean like those fucking macho-commercial body sprays or just stick antiperspirant????? I am afraid!

Yeah, I mean stuff like Lynx/Axxe.

i've had a problems with squirrels (i think) eating through my outdoor light wiring.
my brother suggested keeping them away by sprinkling the area with urine and it's seems to be working.
been using an apple juice bottle to distribute it around the area.
it's been a pretty wet summer and sometimes i'll head out to the deck, bottle in hand, only to measure up the sky and decide that i should wait until it rains or doesn't.
this has let to me leaving my pee occasionally sitting on the counter in my room (which is where the door to the deck is).

maybe when i move out i should leave one behind so the new tenant can get a jump on keeping the pests away!

i don't wear deodorant except in the hottest, moistest days of summer.

i have peed in a coke bottle before, when i REALLY HAD TO PEE but my roommate was in the shower for a long time.

Has the "how do you know it's pee?" q been asked yet?

The old occupant was known for keeping pee bottles and not getting rid of them. One of the roommates saw this thread and confirmed that those are in fact months-old bottles of piss. Evidently there was also a Gatorade bottle, but I've yet to uncover that one-- HOPING he tossed it.

...rather than tossed into it...

plastic soda bottle while driving

i once pissed in a mountain dew bottle at the x-games....on TV!

if you do this in a moving vehicle the resulting bottle of pee is known as a "trucker bomb" iirc

-- elmo argonaut, Friday, August 15, 2008 3:31 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Link

^^^ guy i knew's brother used to mow the median up in Bozeman Pass and apparently trucker bombs were a real hazard. that is, he'd be puttering along in the mower and the tall grass, and then BLAOW he'd hit a trucker bomb and the thing would explode and get trucker piss all over him.

Excellent thread.

he finds a saucepan on the stove, with the gas lit underneath it, full of boiling piss.

dear lord

DOES ANYONE IN THIS BITCH LIKE ICEY PEE

I used to occasionally urinate in those extra-large paper coffee cups when my studio shared a [continually occupied] washroom with a massage parlour. There was no choice. I left them on the table while I was in the studio and always disposed of them at the end of the day. I also have vague memories of urinating in a pint glass, but it's probably best this memory stay as vague as it is now.

haha i had forgotten until i read that post that i once peed in a pint glass at a sebadoh show, right there in the middle of the crowd, and then left the glass on a speaker stack. it looked just like beer of course.

sebadoh fans are notoriously thrifty. free beer!

lol

had to pee in a mountain dew bottle while being the lone dj one night.

barback took it to the land of wind and ghosts, or so i hope

Is this website even used anymore?

not often.

The next night they invited him over for dinner and he had to fess up when he refused to eat salad out of the bowl he had shit in.

The Guys Who Actually Pee in Bottles Defend Their Honor

Crossover with the BBC News website headlines thread. BBC - for all your 'jug of pee' news requirements:

Rev Richard Coles pop star vicar in loo drama

"In a fit of conscience I told my host that I had to pee in his jug because I was trapped in my room this morning (due to his poor maintenance of the door handle).
"He now wants the jug destroyed rather than just thoroughly washed.
"I think this is an over-reaction."

the pee is coming from inside the room

the ex communards guy is otm, it's only a bit of piss ffs. A work colleague of mine once flushed his shit right into a plumbers toolbox. He had to pay for replacements for all the shitted up hand tools, but I suppose that is a bit more justifiable.