The worst shoes you have ever owned. Well??

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Tell me about them.

-- Mike Hanley, Thursday, 14 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Back in the late 80s, when I was going through my glam/goth thing, I had a pair of exceptionally pointed, exceptionally ridiculous cowboy boots. I sensibly changed them in for my current 6 different styles of Chelsea Boots. And now I have deformed toes. My former mod mum (Jazz cigarettes not included) warned me that this would happen if I wore excessively pointed toes with cuban heels, but I did not believe her.

Now can I complain about Paul's unbearably ugly platform disco shoes? They are truly vile. They are so vile that Jarvis Cocker complimented him on them. I mean, honestly... I won't let him out of the house wearing them.

masonic boom, Thursday, 14 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I love all my shoes. I have no worst shoes, because they are all fantabulous. Always have been, always will be. I've never ever owned a pair of ugly shoes, swear to god.

Ally, Thursday, 14 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Oh probably some horrible school shoes which were two sizes too big, you know the horrible cheap-o shoes *yuck*. I always had the trainers (sneakers) which were way down in the hieracrchy like Puma and Hi- Tec, but never the absolute worst Dunlop (they still inspire nightmares, and are now hmmm 'trendy'!). Did anyone ever have a pair of British Knights?, they were pretty popular amongst the rude boys for a while and those classic Reeboks. As a kid I think I really liked my indoor Addidas football shoes, which I wore outside.

james e l, Thursday, 14 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

John Fluevog is the worst shoemaker on earth. All of his shoes hurt "until you break them in" (i.e. wear the back out of the heel, which doesn't take long). Yeah, they're so funky. Blech. I had a pair of the Gibson swirls. Last pair I'll ever buy. They looked snotty, too.

Nude Spock, Thursday, 14 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

The only pair that I would consider really horrible were these really clunky horrible black pair that to my impoverished 13 yr old self resembled doc martens because real docs were out of my price range. They didn't really look like them though, they were ugly and gross and made this annoying clomping sound when walking around. I can't believe I wore them til they fell apart.

Nicole, Thursday, 14 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Chuck Taylors. They killed my feet and fell apart after a week. I'd rather go barefoot than wear those damn things.

Kris, Thursday, 14 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Six years of wearing Chucks ruined my feet for normal shoes, I think. I still love those things, though.

The worst pair of shoes my wife wore was a pair of white sandals that she _knew_ were too narrow for her feet that she bought anyway because they were so cute. I called them the Cruel Shoes.

Dan Perry, Thursday, 14 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I was given these huge white leather low tops which are ugly and very ninities form my brother. I had to wear em, I was broke! But I felt like a white footed booby. They were bad. Now I wear new balance "old school" blue runners.

-- Mike Hanley, Thursday, 14 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Probably my work shoes. They're hideous and definitely not me.

Wish this was about favourite shoes: I have this amazing pair of black platform shoes that are really clunky. Jarvis Cocker actually complimented me on them, and I try to wear them out every chance I get even though it's hard to walk in them... They really are so ace...!

Paul Strange, Friday, 15 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Came into this world with naked feet; will leave it that way. Shoes are totally hippy.

mark s, Friday, 15 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Nude feet are unsightly to God.

-- Mike Hanley, Friday, 15 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

First and only pair of DMs I ever bought hurt my heel to the point where I had to walk with a fucking cane. Is that why they were so punk rock?

Tracer Hand, Friday, 15 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I just bought shoes today. After I bought them, I looked at the box and realized the style name was "Ally". I was so psyched.

Ally, Friday, 15 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Dark orange psuedo-Croc loafers, circa '84. Earned me the nickname 'Snappy'. Out of the Grattan catalogue, probably. What I should've been wearing, of course, was either velcro-strap Pods or chunky tennis shoes. Replaced the aforementioned abominations with Puma Guillermo Vilas, just in time for everyone else at school to switch to super-shiny brogues. Was taunted a second time.

Michael Jones, Friday, 15 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

"Ally" style is 98 % sassy

-- Mike Hanley, Friday, 15 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Chuck Taylor's in 4th grade. I was wearing them to be hip, I was wearing them because they were cheap. Thin canvas shoes aren't comfortable.

Jeff, Friday, 15 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Err, what's the other 2%?

Ally, Friday, 15 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I wonder, does Jarvis Cocker really mention shoes this often?

Kim, Friday, 15 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

My sandals in primary school.

(well, they made me look like John Major's Ideal Schoolboy, which is fucking bad enough.)

Robin Carmody, Saturday, 16 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

bright pink plastic clogs or the bright yellow leather boots that looked like they belonged on dwarves or the sunset orange trainers ... fuck that was a weird year .

anthony, Sunday, 17 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

five years pass...

No wonder these sandshoes only cost $6.99. The stench of Chinese rubber is overwhelming. I feel sick. I think I will have to put bags over my shoes today.

Hard like armour, Friday, 15 June 2007 01:18 (seventeen years ago)

Chucks ruined my feet FOREVRE. Nude Spock OTM for once & only; Fluevogs only lead to tears, pain & regret.

Worst shoes I ever wore were all hand-me-downs from cousins. Most notably rip-off Tevas with velcro that no longer worked (they'd come off my feet if I ran).

Abbott, Friday, 15 June 2007 01:23 (seventeen years ago)

I had a pair of the Dan & Dave Reeboks. Bad on so many levels.

Hurting 2, Friday, 15 June 2007 01:24 (seventeen years ago)

i bought some old navy ballet slipper things and they are just shoe shaped fabric dipped in black plastic. my feet are so torn up

A B C, Friday, 15 June 2007 01:25 (seventeen years ago)

Sorry to drag flip-flops in here, but I had a pair of "Dupe" flip-flops once and they were the shittest thing ever. Fell apart and I always ended up with a dull pain in my feet.
(nb. on the whole, I like flip-flops. It was just this particular pair.)

Drooone, Friday, 15 June 2007 01:30 (seventeen years ago)

i think i was given some purple brushed suede loafers at some point but I could have dreamed them. my late teens saw a succession of bad hand me downs from friends and(worse)new clothes from Marshall's.

tremendoid, Friday, 15 June 2007 01:32 (seventeen years ago)

ugh. The Torture Sandals. Platform sole, uppers were criss-crossed elastic bands (like thick hair ties). In theory, and on sale, they looked cute. OW OW FUCKING OW. Walking was horrid, because the elastic bands caused the sole to slap at your feet if you walked fast, and the tension on the elastic bands caused by the heavy sole gouged out the tops of your feet. Worst. Shoes. Ever.

VegemiteGrrrl, Friday, 15 June 2007 02:21 (seventeen years ago)

nine months pass...

I have a pair of Pumas that I really like the look of, but after wearing them (not even daily) for about six months, they developed a horrendous smell. At first it was just when I'd take them off, but eventually they got to the point where I would get a whiff while I was sitting down at my desk at work. I liked them so much, that I bought some of those Dr Scholl's inserts, but they didn't seem to have any effect. I don't have smelly feet, and they don't smell when I wear any other kind of shoe. They are suede.

Needless to say, I had to discontinue them, and I won't be buying another pair like them. I hate my other shoes, so intend to go get a new pair soon, but am afraid of spending another $100 and ending up with smelly shoes. Anyone else had this problem with suede shoes, or even more specifically suede Pumas?

rockapads, Thursday, 3 April 2008 21:24 (seventeen years ago)

https://www.dressthatman.com/pics2/acce/acce262.jpg

m coleman, Thursday, 3 April 2008 21:47 (seventeen years ago)

I bought this god-awful pair of Julius Marlow square-toed dress shoes some years back (my first proper 'work' shoes). They were so uncomfortable at one point, I literally couldn't walk for two days (my foot / ankle was so badly swollen) - and they were my correct size.

__CB__, Thursday, 3 April 2008 21:55 (seventeen years ago)

I had the "Dan & Dave" Reeboks. They were really uncomfortable and really ugly.

Those probably weren't actually the "worst" shoes I ever owned, which were more likely some craps from payless, but that was the best answer I could think of.

Hurting 2, Thursday, 3 April 2008 22:14 (seventeen years ago)

Polo Sport topsider-type deck shoes in navy leather and white canvas with neon yellow accents. Don't ask.

wanko ergo sum, Thursday, 3 April 2008 22:20 (seventeen years ago)

I once bought some black leather Nikes with a red swoosh and white base. I think I wore those for a few weeks before deciding I hated how they looked. In terms of the ugliest shoes I've bought, those come close. The shoes I have right now are lame, too. They are K-Swiss and super comfy, but they are pure black and look like the type of shoes service and retail workers wear when they need something comfortable that is black for a dress code.

rockapads, Thursday, 3 April 2008 23:54 (seventeen years ago)

all black 926s 4 my job

mkcaine, Friday, 4 April 2008 00:06 (seventeen years ago)

Converse All Stars (Chuck Taylors)

chaki, Friday, 4 April 2008 00:07 (seventeen years ago)

y r chucks the worst

sleep, Friday, 4 April 2008 00:10 (seventeen years ago)

They kind of assume your foot is a pancake, when it is in fact a foot and requires the support and love a foot needs. You shouldn't be able to feel everything you're stepping upon.

Abbott, Friday, 4 April 2008 01:12 (seventeen years ago)

The GROMMETS heat up in the hot summer sun and bcz the canvas tongue is so thin you get grommet-row foot burn. And the plastic toe cap lines up with my toe joints to irritate them. And I associate them w/being saddo 15-yr-old bcz mine had all SY lyrics all written on 'em by me, until I realized they were an insult to all human feet and stopped buying/wearing them.

Abbott, Friday, 4 April 2008 01:14 (seventeen years ago)


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