What the heck do dads want for their birthdays?

Really.

Dad in question: celebrating his 60th birthday; is basically pretty broke and knows I am too; not in any way an extravagant type; intelligent, a 'reader' etc but not really, you know, flamboyantly intellectual; lives in a flat in Cornwall with my brother, his girlfriend and a cat; drinks with his mates at the snooker club most evenings as far as I can tell. Probably none of that helps but I just typed it all out so eh. We are on perfectly OK terms but hardly ever speak, just birthdays and Christmas tend to suffice.

So tell me what to buy him for his birthday as I have no clue.

Replies relating to my current screen name are welcomed BTW

Pretty sure whiskey was invented for sons who have no idea what to buy their father.

a portsmouth home strip

Whiskey tumblers.

3 kilo bag of cherry liqueurs and a night out with the Sugababes, cheers.

I always buy my dad golf themed stuff (puzzle in the shape of a golf ball, shoehorn in the shape of a golf club, etc., etc.). He doesn't play golf.

a portsmouth home strip

lol he is actually a Gooner

My dad always gives me a list of CDs that he want his for his birthday or Christmas, which I can order of my "machine".

Er, socks?

http://www.chocolatefantasies.com/poo-LarBear.jpg

DVD or CD or book is usually a good call.

Surprise him! Buy him a unicycle TODAY!

Your local council raised hooligans morning soccer kick around certainly takes on new meaning in Triga's latest British film �Scally Soccer Orgy�. Ben more than loves his pussy, but when he and the lads sit chatting with a few beers to cool themselves down after their kick-about, the drink fuelled banter between them soon turns from pussy and the ladies to lads and their cock! As the beer is sank, it really isn�t long before Ben gets more than he bargained for when the horny lads chat soon turns into a full-on spunk filled cock-sucking and rough-lad arse fucking filled orgy! Scally Soccer Orgy features 12 British lads including Danny from 'Scallyboy Orgy' who ends up fuckin some poor lads arse and Painter Paul from Uniform Britain taking it nice and hard like a good en! And both for the very first time!
Review After a kick about, this group of mates head off to the changing rooms to clean up. As usual the beers are ready and as the banter starts the lads find their hands disappearing down their shorts and on to their growing cocks. Soccer shorts start to show signs of swelling knobs and soon the lads are taking off their sweaty footy shirts and stroking in front of each other, checking each other out, comparing cock size. As the room goes quite the lad start to wank each other off, some go further and start sucking their mates� cocks. Every lad needs to get off and they are all cool about helping each other out; it�s just lads together, ain�t it. It�s what mates do for each other. Muscle boys enjoy the attention of the leaner lads, but as long as there are all getting cock action, they don�t fucking care who�s mouth or hand is working their meat. Like a pack of dogs on heat their just wanna get fed. Out comes the massage table but it really should be called a `fuck bench` as one lucky lad gets well screwed by his best mate. Then another geeza wants in on the action and what started out as a `best mate circle jerk` is turning into a full on suck and fuck free for all. Throats get fucked and butts get stuffed as this dirty soccer team play hard and rough with each others mouths and holes. And once they have all had their fill of each other, two lads get laid out on the table and as the team gathers round, both blokes gets well covered in their team-mates spunk. A fucking great end to this all lad orgy. But one lad still ain�t had enough and decided he wants a one-on-one with a team mate. Great shots of him trying to take his mates cock and getting his ass fucked while still in his shorts. And another `top` lad decides he wants to get his ass fingered to help his balls empty. Fucking nice ass mate. Classic Triga. Cheers lads.

lock thread

Early-ish edition of a book written in 1948? Maybe 1984 is a decent shout?

Seriously thought that was a Marcello-style Babelfishing for a while there.

Maybe I'll just post him this Cheap Trick LP I'm playing, be all "hey now you can feel 28 years old like your loser son"

xpost not that I have any idea about book collecting scenes but if it is feasible I will totally jock that idea

http://rdr.zazzle.com/img/imt-prd/isz-m/pd-235519049045341719/tl-world_s_best_daddy_t_shirt.jpg http://www.delawareonline.com/blogs/uploaded_images/coz-741386.jpg

Take him out to lunch to a place whose food he really likes and where he feels comfortable. He'll appreciate the gift of your planning ahead and, above all, your company. Also buy him a paperback copy of Joseph Mitchell's wonderful "Up in the Old Hotel" (non-fiction, concise articles).

Beer or jumper or both!

A harmonica?

Or a bong.

Have a look at I Want One of Those.

God don't

coffee mugs

a tie that says "world's best dad"

a jumper that says "ban burt stanton"

if my future child in 30 years gave me a "jumper" that said that, I would go into a seizure and roll on the floor in anguish over the absolute confusion of it all. that's when you realize your entire life is just an illusion of your own consciousness

All you people are just figments of my imagination, so please stop posting because I need to get some sleep, OK?