what the fucking shit

http://www.cnn.com/2008/SHOWBIZ/books/10/20/library.cat.book.ap/index.html

see thread title

I wish I could abandon my cat at the library. :(

Spencer is a town that hasn't changed much since the 1930s, with a downtown of family-owned stores in connecting two- and three-story brick buildings, a second-run movie theater and The Hen House, which sells decorating items to farmwives.

give me a fucking break

yayyyyy cats

*I* like cats!

wtf dan? don't you like cats who can read and who have big eyes like disney characters?

it's officially a trend now, the chimp from Tarzan got a book out recently too.

Hen Fap House

wtf dan? don't you like cats who can read and who have big eyes like disney characters?

I don't like it when crazy cat ladies turn their psychoses into top 10 books.

Also, this:

She recalls how Dewey's health began to fail in the year before he died and how, to help him put on weight, she would feed him cheese, scrambled eggs and roast beef sandwiches. "And he loved it!"

On the day Dewey died, Myron was about to leave for a trip to Florida when she got a call from the library staff telling her Dewey wasn't acting right.

"He was fine when I left, or I thought he was, but when I went back down there I could see he was in pain," Myron says. An X-ray at a local vet showed he had a large stomach tumor. She stayed with Dewey as he was put to sleep.

call me a fucking sap but i totally teared up a little bit reading about dewey the cat

probably also because i am a cat owner

I owned cats for over a decade and I miss them dearly, but this is not anywhere my definition of "understandable behavior", particularly the bit where she says how in his last year of life, she lovingly fed him to death.

HELLLLLO DAN

http://i2.cdn.turner.com/cnn/2008/SHOWBIZ/books/10/20/library.cat.book.ap/art.dewey.jpg

I think to be around Dan while he reads CNN.com could lead to some scary moments and potentially getting caught in the crossfire.

Mr. Que little do you know, below his shoulders that kitty is covered in green, suppurating sores. Not so cute now!

Totes WTF at this who uses dewey anymore it's all LC y'alls!

the funny thing is, i love green suppurating sores

Patrons took to him quickly, and over time visitors increased from 60,000 a year to more than 100,000. Many were suffering from the crippling economy that hit the farming community especially hard, and Myron thinks Dewey lifted their spirits and made them a bit more eager to stop off at the library.

"Dewey didn't bring jobs to Spencer, but there were a lot of farmers who came in to fill out the first resume of their life. They didn't know how to use the computer, they were having a tough time and were really down when they came in. Dewey won them over and put a smile on their face," Myron says.

"He ... was something to be proud of when Spencer didn't have a lot to be proud of."

waht

public libraries use Dewey, libcrypt.

i wonder if dewey knew how to kick farmers off of computers for downloading farmer porn

I admit this is awesome:

Two of Dewey's best friends were homeless men who would stop by the library.

"They never spoke to us but they would pick up Dewey and talk to him for 20 minutes. I don't know what they said. It didn't seem to matter, but it made them feel better," she says. "He also seemed to know who needed him more than others."

That is so bittersweet.

Dan is just a bitter Marley & Me partisan. It's like a Simpsons die-hard ragging on Family Guy.

His ashes were buried in the lawn outside the library. A granite marker was placed at the site.

^^ Doing better than Mozart.

Will the burgeoning Dewey for U.S. President Write-in Campaign have time to crest before Nov. 4th?!?!

So help me God, if you p'shop a Dewey Defeats Obama meme...

Myron believes his legacy will live on in a possible movie deal and in the stories people share about him -- stories like the one from a woman whom Myron met during a book-signing in Sioux City.

I was about to post "SRSLY WHAT THE FUCKING SHIT" but then I remembered:

http://www.impawards.com/2005/posters/because_of_winn_dixie_ver2.jpg

Oh man, oh man, I hope they're calling him Dewey DEAD-cimal system. now that he's dead.

I doubt the woman overfed the cat to death, btw. Our old cat died of stomach cancer and the vet told us to feed him whatever he'd eat, cos they lose a ton of weight from the cancer.

I mean, I don't begrudge a small town a beloved library cat any more than I begrudge Portland that much-loved Powell's cat (RIP, mourn you til I join you)

Uhhhggggggh cannot even read article, it's so schmaltzy. "I always called it his magic/I felt a connection with him right away/you could see down into his soul from his eyes" -- this is nonsense and this woman needs to get out more.

Myron, who hopes to begin publishing a series of children's books about Dewey in the next couple of years.

Nnnoooooo please god no no these are guaranteed to be complete garbage

I admit it's been years since I owned a cat but I thought it was never actually a good idea to feed a cat human food.

xp: LAUREL KNOWS THE SCORE

ps: so mad at nabisco right now for making me google Marley & Me

Dewey, named after the Dewey Decimal System used by libraries to catalog books, quickly became well known in Spencer, a farm town of about 11,000, although no one is sure why the rest of the world cared about the him.

i have a theory on this, it has to do with this photo:
http://i2.cdn.turner.com/cnn/2008/SHOWBIZ/books/10/20/library.cat.book.ap/art.dewey.jpg

My theory is "Grand Central Publishing".

librarians, children love adorable orange hobo cats, film at 11

"cheese, scrambled eggs and roast beef sandwiches" = all made of things you can find in like a zillion different brands of cat food, if perhaps in different proportions

that photo is not any more cute than the average kitty

soz

I like that the entertainment homepage lists this story under the title "The amazing true story of Dewey the cat". Wow, a kitten grew up in a library and was liked and petted by people, how AMAZING! That can't be true... but it IS!!!

"He ... was something to be proud of when Spencer didn't have a lot to be proud of."

"at least our library has a cat"?

Love the cat, save the cat, god knows nothing deserves to suffer and if you make each other happier, go for it! Do NOT write entire books about the cat's soul based on what you see in his eyes and then do not make me work on the resulting series of execrable "children's" books.

as per everything in the world always you are missing the point louis which is that cats are cute and people love cute things.

Okay since it's too early for "what the fucking shit part II" I will post this here:

http://hollywoodinsider.ew.com/2008/10/probst-creates.html?cnn=yes

WHAT THE FUCKING SHIT

i prefer the library with the BANNED BOOK TABLEAU:

http://craphound.com/images/twMatt.JPG

I wonder if I could get a book deal out of being a cat hating librarian. Well, I just hate one specific cat. But still.

that doesn't really sell as well to middle american housewives. um xpost?

I mean seriously apparently they're giving book deals for anything these days.

Here's a link to what libraries should be doing rather than making spurious claims for their resident felines: http://www.boingboing.net/2008/10/03/library-celebrates-b.html

in small town library, cat saves you

do you see?

that cat is a publishing genius

this book will also be v popular w monkeys:
http://myhero.com/images/guest/g22506/hero21390/g22506_u20090_koko_pix_reading_book.jpg

Also that TV show probably deserves its own thread. Unless it's a hilaaaarious hoax!

I wish I could ban my cat from existence.

i wish i could ban my cat allergy

you should just put it in a library

hahaha another "literary cat"
http://static.flickr.com/30/44058986_b2504fbf9f.jpg

haha i would like to hear more about why Nicole hates her cat

I would get fired, seriously. He just howls 24/7 and assaults people.

omg now THAT is a book I would read

lol nicole

And then he finds something with plastic in it and throws up bright yellow vomit all over the place.

librarian vs. cat >>> library + cat

librarian vs. many cats vs. t.s. eliot

hahahaha elmo

nah library vs. cat is best

suggestions for future dan perry threads:

holy fucking balls - in which dan learns that people enjoy eating delicious foods
christ on a fucking crutch - dan copies and pastes the weather reports from various small-town newspapers and then mocks them
my fucking shitting mind is blown - pictures of sunsets followed by incredulous posts like "can you believe this bullshit?"

Here's a suggestion, n/a: shut the fuck up and don't post on any threads I start anymore since you're a big douchebag nowadays.

i laffed

http://i17.photobucket.com/albums/b58/granolaglam/fucking_peppers.jpg

xpost

me-ow! hiss.

I imagine Nicole's cat is like this.

they're just suggestions, you don't have to actually start them

my fucking shitting mind is blown - pictures of sunsets followed by incredulous posts like "can you believe this bullshit?"

this one is good actually

Actually I do now, fucker.

haha Chill dan. That was funny. Not to be chi-partisan.

I imagine Nicole's cat is like this.

Yes, I can't imagine wanting to get rid of that cat.

Wait, so Pt. II was basically Make-A-Wish TV?

I am a sucker for the often-used joke about terminally ill teenage boys who are like "my final wish is to get laid," because I find it hard to believe that everyone's terminal-illness wish is quite so cheery and wholesome and life-affirming as most stories would have us believe. I would totally watch a dying-wish reality show if at least one in twenty ill people were bitter and hedonistic and just wanted the cash for coke and sex workers.

"I want to eat unicorn. Just once."

lol Dan that clip is my local FOX affiliate. Needless to say they suck.

"You know how impossible it is to get acid? I want some fucking acid before I die, please. The real stuff."

acid yes but this is make a wish, you could and should just go straight for DMT

hahaha Pancakes

Wait, so Pt. II was basically Make-A-Wish TV?

Not only that, it's a direct bite off of a show already being done by the host of The Amazing Race: http://noopportunitywasted.com/

xpost Then you can have machine elves a la Terence McKenna, woo!

I'm a little scared by the linkage between global-survivor competitions and terminal illness

There's something very Joe vs. the Volcano about it.

You may be picking that vibe up from this:

The show, Live Like You’re Dying, will feature a person who has been given a terminal diagnosis with a finite amount of time to live and “take them on the last adventure of their life,” according to Probst. That adventure will include reunions with lost friends or formerly feuding family members, a “legacy moment” that will ensure their name carries on forever, and living out a personal dream. “It could be playing guitar with Eric Clapton or jumping out of a plane into a volcano,” Probst explained to EW.com. “Whatever it is that you’re still desiring to do in your life — we want to make it happen.”

playing guitar with Eric Clapton or jumping out of a plane into a volcano

T/S, anyone?

playing guitar in Volcano! or jumping out of a ha where's this going

to bed, I hope

wau I am completely unrecognizable on the latter half of this thread

sorry n/a, I have no idea why I was so touchy yesterday

Why do I always miss these awesome threads when they're running? :( ;_;

that's ok, i was goading you, i probably deserved it

If you took acid on your death bed, how would you know when you finally died?

I found another version of Nicole's evil cat:

I have family in Spencer

Spencer library cat is OK by me

and if you guys haven't read the book, the chapter about how he takes pleasure in cleaning his ass in front of library patrons is some Henry Miller-level realness, you really gotta give Spencer library cat a chance

my cats love cleaning their ass EVERYWHERE.
i doubt the library cat waits until there are people around to clean his ass.
he just does it when he needs to.
if a cat cleans his ass in a forest and there's no one around to see it..

i just fed Salty a bite of fatty pork chop.
t-minus 5 minutes to stinky hallway time.

hahaha J0hn, how the hell are you managing to convince this book might not be incredibly awful?

oh yeah, puerile humor

more interested in an animated series (aimed at 3-8 year olds) about library cat.

i think this is the thread where i should mention that i bought this book at the salvation army a few days ago:
http://www.amazon.com/Cat-Wholl-Live-Forever-Adventures/dp/0767909038/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1224905687&sr=8-1

lol waht?? haaa

I made this shitty little illustration to accompany an editorial about the election, the Cubs and a lack of newspapers for sale following the Cubs' victory over L.A. last week.

A co-worker came up to my desk today and told me, "You know you got that headline wrong in your art, right?"

what the fucking shit.