IN THIS ECONOMY! The musical

It's awful hard to get a job IN THIS ECONOMY!

I might as well just be a SLOB in THIS ECONOMY!

Without is without in the economy
Darkness is not dark in the economy
Time is not time in the economy
Sun becomes moon in the economy
It's only hard at first in the economy
No guilt, no retribution in the economy

If I had a buck
for my rotten luck
I'd be making something for my time!

Got no IRA
No 401k
I'm gonna have to do a crime!

IN THIS ECONOMY!

Even Deuteronomy
would be pushed to felony
can you blame me
or the ECOMOMY???

In this economy, we are doomed
In this economy, we are consumed,
BY FEEEAAAAAAARRRRRRR-GGGGHHHH

(Death metal vocals)

Woke up this morning feelin' 'round for my shoes,
Them shoes's so busted up that I got the walking blues,
But then I saw a man who had no feet,
IN THIS ECONOMY!!

If I had a buck
for my rotten luck
I'd be making something for my time!

Got no IRA
No 401k
I'm gonna have to do a crime!

― i'm shy (Abbott), Tuesday, February 17, 2009 12:27 PM (22 minutes ago) Bookmark

So Brother can you SPAAAAAAAARE AAAAAAA DIIIIIIIIIIMMMEE!

(freeze. long pause. set change to fast oompah music)

I believed the man when he said to me,
So sweetly, he said, for a minimal fee
We'd get us a future as bright as the sun
With a little thing called collateralized debt obligation

can't believe i got a LAAAAAAYYYY off
so much debt i gotta PAAAAAAAYYYY off
and all my money was with MAAAAAAAAdoff
guess i'll sell my tom kincAAAAAAde off
in this economy!

http://www.musicweb.uk.net/film/2000/Sept00/How_Now.jpg

barneys just canceled my charge account
my mortgage is a really large amount
my fiancee left, she says i'm a wanker
bro, you know it's hard out here ... for a banker

I support the idea of this thread but I feel I should point out that "in THIS economic climate!" is much lulzier which is why I have adopted it as my personal catchphrase

So, this thread's B.S. seal of approval comes with an asterix is what you're saying here.

ILX Dinner Players Presents: Recession, The Musical!

Now, come up with a cast list.

Hurting and I are wide eyed naifs who just started law school in a city that won't even be able to employ its own squeegee men soon.

All this complaining just blurs into one great big whine
You should have been born pre-1949

We had wars, and the sixties, and civil rights struggles
You had Pokemon and groups like the Buggles
It was hard for us! So hard in those days!
Buying a brownstone in Brooklyn took several months' pay!

bernie made off with my money
new tax bracket means more tax-onna-me
can't go sailing with my honey
in this damned ecomony

No more money for hookers and blow.
Out with my repossessed yacht they go.
I'll have to get my kicks
looking up rude words in the dictionary
In this eff-ing economy

Heads you lose, tails you lose
And this time you can't even blame the Jews
In this economy

lol

I had to reduce my mistress count
Because they cost such a great amount
but they all left in a huff
and my wife is suing for alimony
in this wretched economy

The whole recession started
When common sense departed
We all became retarded
In this economy

The public can no longer be taken for a ride
Politicians are wanting bigger bribes
I can't keep control
Going to have to resort to bank note forgery
In this motherblastin' economy

my favorite handcrafted beverage line used to be bundaberg
now i'm in the gutter with a bottle of thunderbird
i can no longer hang with stuff white people like
and this time you can't even blame the kikes

IN THIS ECONOMY!

I imagine all these songs having a "When You're a Jet" vibe.

i don't know what happened, i used to be 1337
but i feel like a n00b out here on the streets
rats fall asleep on my thousand-count sheets
updates get sadder each time i tweet

IN THIS ECONOMY

I used to wipe my backside on the necks of swans
but now I use discarded bags from Cinnab0n
I'm having problems with digestion
I used to pass solids regularly
but not any more in this economy

A pimped out Rolls used to be my ride
But now I take a bus when I go Eastside
It's got bad suspension
No more tinted windows and neon rims for me
in this gosh darned economy

When I used to dine it was on cavier
But now I'll have whatever's cheap, ja?
No money for sausage
Can't even afford a slice of pastrami
in this veg eating economy

I used to wear gold and platinum
Now I dress more like a bum
Not even a wristwatch
No dough for even a fake Casio phoney
in this by-the-clock economy

I used to be such a smartass
But now those cheeky days have past
No-one likes a joker
There's no more time for comedy
in this long faced economy

I used to only smoke half of a cigarette
now I smoke all the butts I can get
Tobacco's so expensive
mouldy dog ends will give me pleurisy
in this lung coughing economy

I used to drink the finest wines
But now I don't have the money or the time
booze costs money
Can't even buy the cheapest brand of whiskey
in this teetotal economy

bridge:

white collar crime stole the oil from my truffles
now i gotta look out for the ridges on my ruffles
i'm a little confused how we got INTO THIS KERFLUFFLE.....

xxpost you should roll your own in this economy

I used to laugh at all the Times Square tramps
but now I'm queueing up for welfare stamps
it's got me licked
I'm this close to committing a felony
in this crime inspiring economy

(xpost) that's sort of what I was getting at - collect dog ends and then roll them up

I used to be quick with a rhyme or verse
But things just go from bad to worse
My meter's out of time
Need something that rhymes with me-me-me
in this free verse economy

Recycling I never used to do my bit
but now I take bottles for the deposit
from gutters and street corners
I even wheel the empties about in a trolley
in this bottle bank economy

I never used to go to the launderette
But now I go there to get my shirts wet
my spin dryer blew up on me
The things I have to do to do my laundry
in this drip dry economy

I always used to like the boss
but now he doesn't seem to give a toss
he's got head count to reduce
looks like I'll have to update my CV
in this resume padding economy

I have always enjoyed smoking a bit of the weed
but now it looks like I'm going to have to take heed
no time to be a space cadet
got to stay on Earth and face reality
in this downer economy

A lot of people like to skive off at work
drink coffee and act like jerks
throwing paper planes
but there's no more time for such japery
in this stalling economy

to the windoooooow, to the wall!
'til the bank comes take it all!
'til the repo men come call!
it was all sub-prime, motherfucker
it was all sub-prime, goddam

I used to subscribe to lots of magazines
but now I'm going to have to cut back on those things
can't waste time reading
I can't lounge around reading about photography
in this far from picture perfect economy

To the tune of "Personality":

Cause... we... are...
Screwed (in this economy)
Stewed (in this economy)
Slammed (in this economy)
Crammed (in this economy)
Done (in this economy)
Son (in this economy)
And of course we've got a great big de-e-ebt

So o-o-ver and over
I'll cut back on my food
O-o-ver and over over
Man, I need new shoes

(xxpost) skeet skeet skeet skeet (went all the bankers with your money)

I used to be a rugger bugger
But now I've become a charity mugger
Answer some questions, mate?
The biro ink is blue and the questionnaires are papery
in this fact finding economy

I used to row a great big punt
but now people are calling me a... runt
my arms are now like pipe cleaners
it's all because of the inadequate diet-ar-y
in this bread and water economy

Snoball is writing a Cole Porter-style list song

My house was decorated with the finest rugs and carpets
but now I've sold them all and taken it back to the parquet
No more deep shag pile
I'm even considering selling the drapery
in this it's-curtains economy

I tried to get my fortune told by Ru55e11 Grant
but he told me that he just can't
his crystal ball's been pawned
he's given up on predicting the future with astrology
in this end-times economy

I used to dine at the finest restauarants and bistros
But now I find that most of them have been closed
They've had their chips
No more gourmandise and world class gastronomy
in this kebab & chips economy

I used to make extra cash designing logotypes and fonts
but now this isn't what the public want
it's sans sans serif
People don't have the cash to fritter on typography
in this John Bull Printing Kit economy

I'm thinking about buying a shotgun
I'm thinking about hoarding seeds
If I can find a way to milk the dog
That's all I'll really need...In this economy!!!

So, this thread's B.S. seal of approval comes with an asterix is what you're saying here.

― Aimless, Tuesday, February 17, 2009 6:12 PM (2 hours ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

People used to fly everywhere in planes
but they don't any more, it's a shame
wings have been clipped
now I need more shoe leather-y
in this Shanks' Pony economy

when the police caught you in the street taking a whizz
they used to just slap you on the wrist
and say "move along now, sir"
But now they send you to jail, the judiciary
in this zero-tolerance economy

I used to collect magazines that were sordid
but now it looks like I just can't afford it
no more fun for me
I can't go on a smut purchasing spree
in this Victorian economy

People used to use telescopes to study Mars
and calculate the movements of the stars
now people count pennies
No-one now had time for the works of Ptolemy
in this navel gazing economy

OK I think I've run out of steam...

"in THIS economic climate!" is much lulzier

Well, what your missing here is it's much harder to rhyme things with that, though.

Near miss.

even more apt kinks song:

I want this on a poster or something.

http://i72.photobucket.com/albums/i191/fluxion23/the-kinks-light-one-up.jpg

Only in non-YouTube resolution