Happy Birthday Emma!

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It is Emma's birthday right?

Anyway, in the absence of Mark S, I hereby post the Emma's birthday thread!

― not Mark S, Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Happy birthday Emma, buy shoes, eat cake, kick ass.

― Anna, Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Hey Em. Buy ass, eat shoes, kick cake!

― N., Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Happy Birthday, have fun!

― Ronan, Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

hip hip hooray for emma! on her magical birthing day!!!

― jel --, Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

erm, I will not follow the above posters into filth, instead I will simply wish you a happy birthday.

― chris, Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

happy birthday, person i am unable to recognise...

― gareth, Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Happy Birthday, Emma. Maybe we should give you the bumps.

― MarkH, Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Happy birthday, Emma! May you continue to explain the appropriate etiquette and generally set us straight about all things in the coming year.

― Jeff W, Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Thanks ILE. I am wearing kick ass boots and will use them vigorously on anyone who tries to give me the bumps. The cake will come later on to line my stomach so I can drink more bouze.

― Emma, Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

AND HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO KIMERA! Still around?

― Jeff W, Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Happy Birthday Emma!!

― Tom, Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Happy birthday Emma. You will have to tell us about the mystery present Tom keeps going on about.

― Nicole, Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

best wishes from me too. I don't usually see these things in time.

― the pinefox, Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

(I think my grebt brain has divined what it is but don't tell Tom as he will get disappointed.)

So far my presents have ROCKED: 1 Glasto ticket - thanks Mum & Dad - and 3 Bad Girls videos !!! and a Craig David & Artful Dodger karaoke vid! ('this video contains actual live performances. But none by Craig David & AD' ha ha ha) so I will be able to lure men back & serenade them. Also a lunch and a dinner. Num num.

― Emma, Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

if i were girly bits, i would be yours. happy booty day!

― Geoff, Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Happy Birthday Emma.Flick ass, as they say in subbuteo circles.

― Jonnie, Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I loved Subbuteo back in the day.

― Ronan, Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I am expecting the return of my long-lost Subbuteo Astropitch very soon. Anyone fancy a flick-about?

Er... what? Oh yes, happy birthday Emma.

― Tim, Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Happy Birthday Emma - you are my new style and taste icon even though I have never met you :)

― Archel, Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

New subbuteo thread coming up. Sorry for the brief hijack Emma, especially on your birthday and all that.

― Jonnie, Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Happy Birthday EMMAG! Tape is coming your way. har har.

― Alan Trewartha, Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Happy birthday Emma. Tom wouldn't conspire in me getting you a present, so blame him.

― Graham, Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Hurrah and happy birthday for Emma! Even if she was kicked out of Trig Brother sooner than I was. ;-)

― Ned Raggett, Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

happy birthday faerie queene

― nickie, Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Happy birthday to the most glamourous person I know. (Still trying to compensate for sounding mean yesterday...)

― alext, Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Happy Birthday Ms H. May your life continue to grow in blinginess.

― RickyT, Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

You still haven't learned to spell glamorous though have you Alex ;) Today I am glamorously attired in mostly fringes which I am thinking is a bit of a fashion victim faux pas & could mean that I will only be allowed to sing Jolene etc. at karaoke. Also I have just painted my nails Butterscotch. Hmmm.

― Emma, Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

You say that like it's a BAD thing! With butterscotch fingernails you can accomplish anything.

What do you call Dolly Parton doing the backstroke? Go on, ask me.

― Tracer Hand, Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

(Butterscotch) Islands in the Stream?

― N., Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

[I don't know the colour of Dolly Parton's nipples]

― N., Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I'll be off now.

― Tracer Hand, Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Ta ra.

― N., Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

The problem is that the Butterscotch nail varnish is uncannily close to the colour of my fingers so it looks like I have no nails, just shiny fingertips.

― Emma, Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I've never noticed your butterscotch hands before.

[Butterscotch hands MMMM.. etc.]

― N., Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

happy birthday emma!

― Ron, Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

It is more the fact that the nail varnish people are lying than the fact that I am made of butterscotch. But Fingerflesh Beige probably isn't a very saleable shade.

― Emma, Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Birthday, yes.

― Mark C, Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Happy birthday Emma!

― rosemary, Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

yay emma! drink lots.

― Ms. S., Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Happy birthday!

― Martin Skidmore, Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Hi, we're Mitch and we'd just like to say Happy Birthday to Emma! Mitch: happy birthday, Emma!

― Mitch Lastnamewithheld, Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Joyeux anniversaire, Emma! When I *finally* hit English ground, we can destroy pubs for miles around......

*blowing out candles on a massive birthday cake*

― Nichole Graham, Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

hey it's a birthday of someone I've actually met!! Happy Birthday, Emma!! I will mail you a new york cheesecake just so you will hate me YUM YUM cheesecake! Someday you will not hate it!!

― geeta, Friday, 17 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Emma sang "Addicted to Bass" as her birthday Karaoke choon and then Alang took us all clubbing! Hurrah!

― Tom, Saturday, 18 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

emma - does your vagina feel older?

― I may not dress like Jacki O, but I do fuck men, Saturday, 18 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Belated birthday wishes Emma, fromsunny Kyoto (as opposed to rainy Niigata where I spent the weekend after Air France lost my luggage). Did you get my card and find your presents?

― Pete, Monday, 20 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I was at an all-day meeting on Friday so I missed this. *sob! *

HAPPY BIRTHDAY EMMA! May you rule over The Streets.

― Dan Perry, Monday, 20 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Hurray! I am still getting birthday wishes! Dan, Pete gave me the Streets for my present but being a total mentalist he hid it in the salad spinner in our cupboard. Like I'm going to be eating SALAD on my birthday! Or in fact ever using a salad spinner rather than buying lettuce in bags from Sainsbury's. However no card from the Barnet Ape yet and what is this mysterious 'presents' plural? I will have to go home & search the flat.

Oh and the scariest present I got was TIT TAPE. Ha ha ha. From SOMEONE ROUND HERE.

― Emma, Monday, 20 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

It wasn't me.

― Graham, Monday, 20 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

god told me to do it. or maybe it was graham.

― Alan Trewartha, Monday, 20 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Graham is a DJ!

― Dan Perry, Monday, 20 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Well anyway I haven't used it yet. The trouble is that plunging necklines are generally worn in an on-the-pull type scenario and being an eternal optimist I would not want to get home with my young man and have him find that I am holding myself up with unalluring tape.

― Emma, Monday, 20 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Aw, someone gave Emma mentalism for her birthday. (Wearing a salad spinner on the pull? PLEASE POINT ME AT THE POST I'M MISSING.)

― Dan Perry, Monday, 20 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Never mind, I se the thing about tit tape now. Somehow my brain kept skipping over it.

― Dan Perry, Monday, 20 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

totally addicted to tape!

― Tracer Hand, Monday, 20 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

someone say something quick, that was horrible

― Tracer Hand, Monday, 20 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Not as horrible as accusing Emma of thinking that taping a salad shooter to her chest would create cleavage.

― Dan Perry, Monday, 20 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

You call them salad SHOOTERS? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

― Emma, Monday, 20 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

No, that was a typo. I can think of few things more potentially hilarious than having a date show up attired in a salad shooter. ("Please, just bring us the lettuce; we'll be making our own salad... *whirr*)

― Dan Perry, Monday, 20 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

answer the question.

― Queen G of the Windy Mores, Monday, 20 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Salad spinner: Basket with a rope that sits inside of a tub used to dry lettuce.

Salad Shooter(TM): An infomercial invention which is like an open-ended food processor used to chop vegetables for a salad.

Neither one could really be considered sexy eveningwear, not even if worn with tit tape. (How does one get into the mindset where tit tape becomes the go-to gift, anyway?)

― Dan Perry, Monday, 20 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Emma. If no card received yet (card contained code to where pressies hidden - well done on finding one in salad spinner) then check the Slang Dictionary. I can't believe Heathrow. They lose my luggage and my card to you!!!

― Pete, Wednesday, 22 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Happy Birthday Emma... May you have every joy in life, Gale.

― Gale, Wednesday, 22 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

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