how mant best friends do you have?

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Friends that you think you will be talking to forever?

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20090625124017AAgaLIw

Poll Results

OptionVotes
0 14
2 11
3 11
4 8
1 6
more than 10 5
5 5
6 3
8 2
7 1
10 1
9 0


Zeno, Tuesday, 14 July 2009 22:09 (fifteen years ago)

"There is only room for one. My inner circle of mentors I keep at a minimum of 5 (that's one hand shake). The other friends I consider associates or enemies I keep close because you need someone under your skin to help to continue doing your best. I hope that helps you."

wtf handshake thing

Matt Armstrong, Tuesday, 14 July 2009 22:13 (fifteen years ago)

http://io9.com/assets/images/io9/2008/09/matinee_3.jpg

kiddie rabies: attacked by brats (latebloomer), Tuesday, 14 July 2009 22:16 (fifteen years ago)

I say 3

conrad, Tuesday, 14 July 2009 22:21 (fifteen years ago)

I reckon 2, realistically.

ears are wounds, Tuesday, 14 July 2009 22:22 (fifteen years ago)

1

barrymore, murdrewland (J0rdan S.), Tuesday, 14 July 2009 22:23 (fifteen years ago)

3

\(*O*)/ good adatud!! (ENBB), Tuesday, 14 July 2009 22:24 (fifteen years ago)

Three, each better looking than the other.

My name is Kenny! (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Tuesday, 14 July 2009 22:29 (fifteen years ago)

In a 'who would be Best Man at my wedding?' sense - two. They'd fucking kill each other if I took sides.

Matt DC, Tuesday, 14 July 2009 22:31 (fifteen years ago)

Two.

Ned Raggett, Tuesday, 14 July 2009 22:32 (fifteen years ago)

http://www.geocities.com/marcusfayne/mantpho.jpg

faucet that ass (sarahel), Tuesday, 14 July 2009 22:34 (fifteen years ago)

None!

Your heartbeat soun like sasquatch feet (polyphonic), Tuesday, 14 July 2009 22:35 (fifteen years ago)

i would've said two until fairly recently but I've come to the realisation that its really just one

❉❉❉❉❉❉❉❉Plaxico❉❉❉❉❉❉❉❉❉ (I know, right?), Tuesday, 14 July 2009 22:43 (fifteen years ago)

three if you count spouse and sibling.

Dan I., Tuesday, 14 July 2009 23:47 (fifteen years ago)

four

51 logins to SB Jol (darraghmac), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 11:57 (fifteen years ago)

How many ilxors are there?

StanM, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 12:27 (fifteen years ago)

I have five best friends who I see more or less weekly, about 5-10 others who I think I'll be talking to forever, but don't see them as often as the first five, for various reasons. Voted for 5.

Tuomas, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 12:34 (fifteen years ago)

Best friends: school one still BFF; university one died 2002; five female 'best friends in London' over the years; three kept on, two jettisoned due to 'musical differences'; three male BFF (one of whom is an ex, one is gay and one has been around 15yrs).

going vogue (suzy), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 12:59 (fifteen years ago)

musical differences!

51 logins to SB Jol (darraghmac), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 13:03 (fifteen years ago)

Huh, you can only have one best friend! But in all seriousness, I have one best friend. We've been "together" for about ten years. I don't know why she stuck by me for so long. I would have long ago given up.

Suzy, musical differences?!?

Unregistered Googler (stevienixed), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 13:09 (fifteen years ago)

Oh okay, people you will talk to forever. Hmm, depressingly I would say none, but hopefully two (husband and aforemetioned best friend).

Unregistered Googler (stevienixed), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 13:10 (fifteen years ago)

No, "musical differences" is what you say when you don't want to discuss the reasons you wound up wanting to throttle each other.

going vogue (suzy), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 13:12 (fifteen years ago)

i voted three - one from high school, two from college. time will tell, right?

ILL WITH THE COMPOSITION (Beatrix Kiddo), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 13:24 (fifteen years ago)

Three, each better looking than the other.

― My name is Kenny! (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Tuesday, July 14, 2009 5:29 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark

ha, i love this

mark cl, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 13:29 (fifteen years ago)

Oh,hahaha, never thought of that excuse, Suzy.

I don't think I have had a friend for longer than ten years. :-(

Unregistered Googler (stevienixed), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 13:31 (fifteen years ago)

six. Blimey, I've known two of my pals for 17 years now, and we're still talking about starting a band!

Orin Boyd (jel --), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 15:39 (fifteen years ago)

"friend you will be talking to forever" and "best friend" are not necessarily the same thing.

Because I tend to think of "best friend" as someone that you hang out with all the time, and tell everything to, and do lots of little things together. While those "friends you will be talking to forever" are the ones you tend not to see that often because they live in different countries - which is actually a really good way of filtering out which friends you will stay friends with forever, because they're the ones that you make an effort to stay in touch with. They're the people you don't *ever* have to explain *anything* to because you've known them so long you know exactly what each other are like, and you can go a year or three without seeing each other, and still pick up in the same place. (That's really nice.)

The former, I don't really have one at the moment. Well, I kinda have someone who's like that, but I'm not, like *her* best friend, if you know what I mean. The latter - maybe 4?

Violent In Design (Masonic Boom), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:57 (fifteen years ago)

voted > 10 tbh, maybe I like people too much

brash trash talker (dan m), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:58 (fifteen years ago)

1 girlfriend who is my "best friend" by any real measurement
1 best friend who ive known since i was born who is more like a brother or close cousin than a best friend
1 brother who will probably be the best man at my wedding
3 college room/dormmates (all male)
5 old high school friends (4 male 1 female)
think that covers it?

rip dom passantino 3/5/09 never forget (max), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 21:02 (fifteen years ago)

Real or imaginary?

Jack Cole (Reginald Mantle), Thursday, 16 July 2009 00:38 (fifteen years ago)

Let me count them, in no particular order: #1 friend who I've known since I was 5 years old because we went to the same Primary and Secondary schools. We only became friends later when we were 19/20, because another friend of mine and him were coworkers and I met him at a party at said friend's house. We actually disliked each other throughout school and once almost had a fist fight.

#2 Aforementioned friend who had the party. Lived in the street I moved into at 12 years old, so I've known him over half my life by this stage.

#3 & #4 Two friends who are brothers, I used to be colleagues with of one of them in my part time job I had at uni and he and also went to my uni and was in the same year. Am probably equally close to both of them and speak to one or the other most days. Introduced to them when I was about 13 or 14 by friend #2.

#5 My older brother, a year and a half older than me and we shared a room as kids. He now lives in a different city but phones and texts me all the time, almost too much because often he doesn't have shit to say and we talk some amount of pish to each other.

#6 Girl I've known for about the last 10 years, friends with a bit of will they or won't they romance thing going on, first girl I ever kissed etc. Currently starting a relationship. She's not in the same league as the rest of my best friends yet but it looks like it's on the way.

The Sorrows of Young Jeezy (jim), Thursday, 16 July 2009 00:48 (fifteen years ago)

becky, kristin, olivia, ryan, marissa, laura, emily, ben, ben, alex, holly, claire, aenora and theresa are all ppl i know i'll be talking to forever, and have at one point or another been very proximate to me, in terms of day to day

I love rainbow cookies (surm), Thursday, 16 July 2009 00:54 (fifteen years ago)

but best like at this very moment is different.

I love rainbow cookies (surm), Thursday, 16 July 2009 00:54 (fifteen years ago)

three definites, plus a few more from school that i'm just become close with recently

the weinest of display names groanly (k3vin k.), Thursday, 16 July 2009 01:08 (fifteen years ago)

i've*

the weinest of display names groanly (k3vin k.), Thursday, 16 July 2009 01:08 (fifteen years ago)

2 I suppose - 3 if you count my partner but is that cheating? (he was already one of my closest friends for a long time before we went out).

Both the others are guys - and one is my ex bf. A lot of people think this is majorly retarded, but stuff them. It doesnt affect him, me or either of our partners.

The other, I've fallen out of touch with in recent months due to both our lives being rather stressful and distracted and we had some harsh words the other day which made me quite sad panda.

Have not had female BFF since high school. She betrayed me and was the most screwy SWF freako I've ever known, I think that put me off ever wanting to hang with girls again :/

seagulls are assholes (Trayce), Thursday, 16 July 2009 01:12 (fifteen years ago)

(She did the whole nine yards: stalking/trying to chat up my boyfriends, spreading shit about me to our other friends, insulting me to my face constantly... yeah I was a bit of a doormat back then)

seagulls are assholes (Trayce), Thursday, 16 July 2009 01:14 (fifteen years ago)

0

Beanbag the Gardener (WmC), Thursday, 16 July 2009 01:42 (fifteen years ago)

yeah, probably zero. i mean, talking to for the rest of my life? with a few exceptions i can't keep friends for more than 3 or 4 years.

ian, Thursday, 16 July 2009 01:43 (fifteen years ago)

Yeah I'm always amazed (and maybe a little envious?) of people who have a best friend theyve known since they were like, 3 years old and went thru all schools with and still hang out.

I moved away from my town tho.

seagulls are assholes (Trayce), Thursday, 16 July 2009 02:07 (fifteen years ago)

"There is only room for one. My inner circle of mentors I keep at a minimum of 5 (that's one hand shake). The other friends I consider associates or enemies I keep close because you need someone under your skin to help to continue doing your best. I hope that helps you."

http://www.bbc.co.uk/comedy/content/images/2007/05/02/dwight_schrute_396x222.jpg

Matt Armstrong, Thursday, 16 July 2009 02:49 (fifteen years ago)

Steadily whittling away to zero through misunderstood emails and money issues

calstars, Thursday, 16 July 2009 02:50 (fifteen years ago)

isn't there technically only one "best" of anything and that's why they're called "BEST friends"?

lohan on 'em (Whiney G. Weingarten), Thursday, 16 July 2009 02:52 (fifteen years ago)

On a split second inventory of the people I'm close to I went with 3. A friend from high school, a friend from college, and a friend from life.

BIG HOOS aka the steendriver, Thursday, 16 July 2009 02:53 (fifteen years ago)

[i[isn't there technically only one "best" of anything and that's why they're called "BEST friends"?[/i]

That's like asking "What's the best Sonic Youth album of the eighties?"

My name is Kenny! (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Thursday, 16 July 2009 02:54 (fifteen years ago)

All of you guys listing your best friends are making me think of Mambo #5

His Honor is, heh, poll-ing the electorate (dyao), Thursday, 16 July 2009 02:57 (fifteen years ago)

EVOL

lohan on 'em (Whiney G. Weingarten), Thursday, 16 July 2009 02:58 (fifteen years ago)

All of you guys listing your best friends are making me think of Mambo #5

― His Honor is, heh, poll-ing the electorate (dyao), Thursday, July 16, 2009 3:57 AM (2 minutes ago) Bookmark

haaaahahaha

I love rainbow cookies (surm), Thursday, 16 July 2009 03:00 (fifteen years ago)

ahahahaha

I love rainbow cookies (surm), Thursday, 16 July 2009 03:00 (fifteen years ago)

Confusion is sex.

My name is Kenny! (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Thursday, 16 July 2009 03:05 (fifteen years ago)

voted 8 because all my dudes from high school that i still chill with are gonna be dudes for life.

north sea jazz dit weekend (call all destroyer), Thursday, 16 July 2009 03:05 (fifteen years ago)

isn't there technically only one "best" of anything and that's why they're called "BEST friends"?

But if you have more than one very, very good friends, all whom you are equally close to, then you have several best friends, no? That's the case with me. Or at least I've never bothered to go through some complex calculations to figure out which one is the best.

I used to have one absolutely best friend, though, from the age 17 to about 22, but then she moved away and we sort of grew apart. After that I've always had several best friends (though a few of them had already been very close friends with me ever since I was a teen, it's just that this one girl was the best friend back then).

Tuomas, Thursday, 16 July 2009 08:46 (fifteen years ago)

Lot of very optimistic people on this thread.

ears are wounds, Thursday, 16 July 2009 08:51 (fifteen years ago)

four

― 51 logins to SB Jol (darraghmac), 15 July 2009 11:57 (Yesterday) Bookmark

https://files.getdropbox.com/u/818963/Photos/oldgroup.jpg

Ode to an SBanned poster I admired (darraghmac), Thursday, 16 July 2009 09:11 (fifteen years ago)

The idea of having only one best friend sort of becomes obsolete at the age your social circle extends beyond "eight people I go down the park with".

Desmond Decca Aitkenhead (Matt DC), Thursday, 16 July 2009 09:18 (fifteen years ago)

Yeah sure, but on the other hand saying you have a dozen "best friends" who you are "sure" you will talk to forever is equally naive imo.

ears are wounds, Thursday, 16 July 2009 09:31 (fifteen years ago)

No, the question was phrased, how many friends you have "you think you will be talking to forever?". I'm sure everyone here knows that friends may come and go, that even best friends can grow distant. But at the moment I feel that there are certain people I will be friends with forever. Of course it's possible things will change in the future, but I can't tell the future, so that's the only way I can measure these things.

Tuomas, Thursday, 16 July 2009 09:42 (fifteen years ago)

Hmmm right maybe people have a broader definition of best friend to me. After discounting my girlfriend and sibling, which seems too much like tempting fate, I basically narrowed it down to the two people a) I can currently always rely on b) I have known the longest c) I would potentially ask to be my best man d) I would deeply regret not keeping up with. In all probability, I won't even be talking to either of those people in ten years, despite the fact that I have known them both since I was about 13. And I have never asked them, but they may not even consider me one of their best friends. I have about another 6-8 close friends, some of whom I have known for as long as my "best friends", and they may or may not become "best friends" at some point in the future (some were "best friends" in the past). And beyond that is an ever-shifting roster of acquaintances, work colleagues, housemates, friends-of-friends, relatives, old university mates, and so on.

I don't think I could sustain relationships with more than 3 or 4 genuine "best friends", and quite a few people I know don't have any best friends at all, just a largish network of people they drift between.

ears are wounds, Thursday, 16 July 2009 10:23 (fifteen years ago)

My "best friends" aren't the same people I think I will know forever. I will probably only know one person forever, and we only talk every couple of weeks or so, but that bond is permanent.

The people I most enjoy seeing on a regular basis are wonderful and enriching but I can imagine a future in which distance intervenes or something, and we just drift apart. All parties would regret it, but we haven't been through enough together to permanently weld us into one person.

Like most people my age, I am 33 (Laurel), Thursday, 16 July 2009 13:53 (fifteen years ago)

Yeah sure, but on the other hand saying you have a dozen "best friends" who you are "sure" you will talk to forever is equally naive imo.

― ears are wounds, Thursday, 16 July 2009 09:31 (4 hours ago) Permalink

i have become better and better each year at keeping up with friends. it's one of my big goals in life, to hang onto the people i care about. so i wouldn't be surprised if the people i think will stick around, will in fact stick around.

I love rainbow cookies (surm), Thursday, 16 July 2009 13:58 (fifteen years ago)

most of the people i consider my best friends, i've known for 8 years or more, some for over 10. that's pretty secure to me!

I love rainbow cookies (surm), Thursday, 16 July 2009 13:59 (fifteen years ago)

yeah, i've known all the people on my list for at least 10 years!

The Sorrows of Young Jeezy (jim), Thursday, 16 July 2009 14:02 (fifteen years ago)

I'm curious about the friends one keeps from childhood. I wasn't even a person yet when I was a teenager, how could I know what kind of people would be a good fit for me as an adult? I guess that's not the point, is it...those friends are part of what forms you into the adult you become. Still...

Was never particularly close to anyone as a kid, nothing that has lasted, although moving 1100 miles away from everyone hasn't helped.

Like most people my age, I am 33 (Laurel), Thursday, 16 July 2009 14:12 (fifteen years ago)

It gets really difficult one you marry and start breeding. Oh boy does it get difficult.

Unregistered Googler (stevienixed), Thursday, 16 July 2009 14:24 (fifteen years ago)

that's why gay guys make for good friends

I love rainbow cookies (surm), Thursday, 16 July 2009 14:26 (fifteen years ago)

Oh Surm, I wish you were my friend. You seem like the bestest friend ever. :-)

Unregistered Googler (stevienixed), Thursday, 16 July 2009 14:39 (fifteen years ago)

awww ;)

I love rainbow cookies (surm), Thursday, 16 July 2009 14:41 (fifteen years ago)

most of the people i consider my best friends, i've known for 8 years or more, some for over 10. that's pretty secure to me!

Well yeah sure, the group of close friends I mentioned, including my two best friends, which amounts to about 8-10 people, I have all known for at least 10 years (although only two, maybe three, were close friends for the entirety of that period). I've been with my partner for nearly 8 years as well. I mean for someone to be even considered as your best friend there has to be some minimum period of knowing them. I don't see this as a guarantee that they won't drift away though, especially once you all start having kids, getting married, living abroad, having proper careers and so forth. For full disclosure, I am in my mid-twenties and I imagine that social groups are more transitory at this age and that maybe once you get into your thirties it becomes clearer who your long term friends are going to be, if only because you are more settled. (though that is just an idle thought and not a comment on anyone in this thread's age, as I have no idea how old you lot are).

it's one of my big goals in life, to hang onto the people i care about.

Sometimes there are good reasons why you drift apart from people as well though. It has to be reciprocal; I've known plenty of people I have cared about and regretted drifted apart from, but it was as much their fault as mine. Trying to force friendships to work out of nostalgia has never worked in my experience.

ears are wounds, Thursday, 16 July 2009 15:03 (fifteen years ago)

i thought you might take my comment in that way, but i certainly do not force friendships out of nostalgia. sure, i'm nostalgic, and sure, i give my friendships the time of day, but i wouldn't be friends with someone if it wasn't reciprocal.

i guess i just don't feel like i need to wait til my 30s to know who i consider my family.

I love rainbow cookies (surm), Thursday, 16 July 2009 15:09 (fifteen years ago)

4 (not counting my gf here, but she qualifies as well if you remove the semantics). i have known 3 of them for 23 years, and the other one for 15. they are all awesome.

and the oscar goes to "HOT TUB TIME MACHINE!" (jjjusten), Thursday, 16 July 2009 15:20 (fifteen years ago)

xpost

Sorry I didn't intend to sound mean; I wish I had a large group of very close friends like you, who wouldn't? But I am cautious, accrue close friends gradually, and don't tend to open up very much to anyone except my partner. Not because I have been stung in the past, it just seems to be a component of my mentality. I also pretty much reject this notion that friends constitute the 21st century family.

ears are wounds, Thursday, 16 July 2009 15:22 (fifteen years ago)

see, i cannot reject this notion. my family history is kind of complicated, so there ya go

I love rainbow cookies (surm), Thursday, 16 July 2009 15:26 (fifteen years ago)

as someone who is siblingless, this family of the 21st century idea is appealing to me. i mean, i love my mom and dad, but they're my mom and dad, you know?

and the oscar goes to "HOT TUB TIME MACHINE!" (jjjusten), Thursday, 16 July 2009 15:28 (fifteen years ago)

also pretty sure this list would have been exactly the same in my mid 20's, so

and the oscar goes to "HOT TUB TIME MACHINE!" (jjjusten), Thursday, 16 July 2009 15:29 (fifteen years ago)

basically aside from my wife, any invocation of the phrase "best friend" is going to take me back to ppl I knew growing up (sorry awesome college friends ;_;)

suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Thursday, 16 July 2009 15:34 (fifteen years ago)

ah screw you college friends you can suck it

and the oscar goes to "HOT TUB TIME MACHINE!" (jjjusten), Thursday, 16 July 2009 15:39 (fifteen years ago)

hahahahahahahahahha

I had written "except for John, he can suck it :-D" but deleted it

sometimes there are very strong reasons for why people are friends

suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Thursday, 16 July 2009 15:40 (fifteen years ago)

ya rly

and the oscar goes to "HOT TUB TIME MACHINE!" (jjjusten), Thursday, 16 July 2009 15:41 (fifteen years ago)

Get a room you two

Unregistered Googler (stevienixed), Thursday, 16 July 2009 15:48 (fifteen years ago)

we got a blog instead. taking things slow, dont want to spoil the magic.

and the oscar goes to "HOT TUB TIME MACHINE!" (jjjusten), Thursday, 16 July 2009 15:56 (fifteen years ago)

http://jjjusten.blogspot.com, in case you all hadn't noticed.

suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Thursday, 16 July 2009 16:01 (fifteen years ago)

ha, i'm in touch with NO-ONE from elementary/middle school and i kinda never wanna see any of them again, excepting maybe my godsister who was in my class for a year or two

ILL WITH THE COMPOSITION (Beatrix Kiddo), Thursday, 16 July 2009 16:18 (fifteen years ago)

My best friend from elementary school once came into our shop. My parents said she was still a bitch. I luckily wasn't a witness. She dumped me one day. Never knew why. Just did. The weirdest thing ever.

Unregistered Googler (stevienixed), Thursday, 16 July 2009 19:13 (fifteen years ago)

1. husband
2. best friend from age 15 on in Idaho
3. best friend here

kind-hearted, sensitive keytar player (Abbott), Thursday, 16 July 2009 20:31 (fifteen years ago)

Automatic thread bump. This poll is closing tomorrow.

System, Monday, 20 July 2009 23:01 (fifteen years ago)

Automatic thread bump. This poll's results are now in.

System, Tuesday, 21 July 2009 23:01 (fifteen years ago)

too mant to count!

"lol" as frivolity (Stevie D), Tuesday, 21 July 2009 23:08 (fifteen years ago)


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