anticipating the Comedy Central Roast of Joan Rivers

Jeffrey Ross: "If you Google her, you can find her on Craig's and Schindler's lists."

http://www.comedycentral.com/shows/roast_rivers/index.jhtml

Jeffrey Ross and Greg Giraldo are on every single one of these things and they always aim more for shock value than actual humor. I mean, more so than the other roasters.

bound to be good

sometimes shock works, as in JR's classic "I wouldn't fuck Sandra Bernhard with Bea Arthur's dick."

JR = jeff ross or joan rivers?

Ross (I think he's basically repulsive, but he does make me laugh now and then. Also, he got my friend Bob into the Friars Club.)

Yes, but he made the exact same joke in the previews of the new JR Roast (kathy griffin with chastity bono's new dick)

well, it was funny once.

it's kind of funny the second time too.

this looks horrible

it looks great!

but i kinda like them all.

I'd count on a few Rabbit Test punchlines, but none about the TV biopic where Joan and her daughter played themselves ('dramatizing' their husband/dad's suicide -- total class).

these are always so so funny

the giraldo/ross/lampanelli types are the best imo

i can't stand lampanelli, even when her jokes are funny i find that barked delivery really obnoxious

yeah she's awful

LISA LAMPANELLI
SHE'S FAT
SHE FUCKS BLACK GUYS
THAT'S FUNNY

well, obv

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qzts4Q_ak3E

^ love this

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That whiteboy is loved by niggas lmao

more promos: calling her Gollum and Swamp Thing

Emmitt looks happy to have gotten out alive.

liked Tom Arnold's definition of "diva"

GOD I love Mo'Nique

"I look like a surprised catfish!"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T8Kb9Hmkuxc

Haha after 25 years of dishing it out she'll have to prove she can take it

Nothing can top Norm MacDonald roasting Bob Saget, in my odd little book.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Gc3QZIMKqA

btw Rivers and this Kathy Griffin being "gay idols" is why we can add comedy to the list of things gays have rotten taste in.

Norm MacDonald supposed to be like Neil Hamburger right?

this megan cummings chick is lmfao imo

lol, whitney cummings -- my bad

watching the trump one now

I really can't be bothered with this Trump thing unless someone cuts off his head and shits down his throat

That Rivers documentary was a ghoulish creepfest

yeah this one is terrible RIP giraldo

cummings was good tho

the situation bombing was pretty entertaining

dunno why snoop is always at these now

ross has been p good

have i missed lampanelli

alright i guess so

lampanelli is always boring imo

snoop being there always opens up tons of easy jokes and for a non-professional comedy person he usually delivers jokes pretty well

yeah the situation totally bombing was the funniest part of it, especially the "i don't give a fuck" look on his face the whole time

wish gilbert goddfried got a few more minutes

marlee matlin was killin' it, even before gilbert showed up.

Yeah, she did well. I liked the new guy the most (Anthony Jezzelbeck?), but some of the other sets were pretty good (Ross was good as usual). Larry King was funny. The problem is that nobody really got Trump very well; besides Matlin they didn't really have anyone who was associated with him (besides maybe Larry King?) I think that's why the roasts of guys like Chevy Chase/Bob Saget/William Shatner work so much better.

Went back and watched The Situation's routine again; I actually thought some of his jokes were funny (and others just made no sense whatsoever), but the audience just went dead. I was hoping he would be good at this because I love seeing the Situation appear in random places.

CC actually ran promos for it centered on The Situation being awkward and the crowd not making a sound

i dunno...i love that stuff. norm mcdonald intentionally bombing 2 years ago was one of my favorite things anyone's ever done on one of these, especially since it came from someone who you'd think could use a "career revival". even better because it seemed to be a commentary on the quality of the jokes being told that night (the only real difference is that norm's were mostly clean)

The audience "just went dead" because Sitch made a crack about how Trump's ancestors bought property and Snoop's ancestors were property. Geddit? It was cut out of the broadcast but you can see exactly when it happened. They are initially indulging him but then it's just shaking heads all around.

lol okay that explains a lot. thinking back to it you can tell when it was said. the most awkward line (besides that) was something like: "Trump loves to fire people...but it's okay, since he's really let himself go", which was a real groaner. called seth mac "jeff" was funny, intentional or (most likely) not

wow...my grammar took a turn for the ouch

oh really? damn. i thought it was just the comedians and the audience wanting the kid to know he wasn't in on the joke and that he couldn't even deliver the material that was written for him halfway well. xpost

i don't know why but it just occured to me that Sting would be an awesome choice to roast for next year...

only if all the roasters were Copeland, Summers, Elvis Costello and a bunch of musicians/music nerds

Just realized that Arnold Schwarzenegger would be the holy grail of celebrity roasts. I would definitely pay to see that happen.

http://www.usatoday.com/story/life/people/2014/08/28/reports-joan-rivers-stops-breathing-in-surgery-hospitalized/14736559/

(if you don't have anything nice to say...)

I like her. Hope everything is okay.

aw no

aw n-overdue

You held out for 9 whole minutes Morbs!

damn if only joan was a poster here we'd finally have him

it was hard xp

she can't be killed by surgery, that would be like Keith Richards being killed by heroin

lol

so inappropriate yet it's hard to deny it's the kind of line she'd want to go out on

I need to enlist jaymc to find Shakey's "She's a comedian? I thought she was just some fashion bitch."

Courtney Love's Jew Loan Officer (Shakey Mo Collier) wrote this on thread the PBS comedy docu-miniseries "Make Em Laugh" on board I Love Everything on Jan 30, 2009

I did catch a bit of Joan Rivers doing standup as a young woman which I had never seen, that was surprising. I didn't even know she did stand-up I thought she was just some fashion bitch.

good work!

damn if only joan was a poster here we'd finally have him

Not really, it's been established that wishing a poster's chronic illness finishes him only gets you a week off.

I'm charmed that you want to have me, croup, but there isn't that much chloroform on earth.

i wasn't suggesting you get more than a week off

and i definitely wasn't suggesting that I get a weak off

at least she squeezed this out

http://www.tmz.com/2014/08/07/joan-rivers-rants-palestine-civilian-deaths-israel-hamas-video/

"I thought she was just some fashion bitch" is some rank shit.

fashion is a nightmarish industry populated by hideous monsters so nyah

I do like Joan Rivers though

^disappointing

"resting comfortably"

TOLD YA