Mystery Date!

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Ok (I start all my posts with Ok); so faithfull followers of my romantic travails will recall a few weeks ago when the cute but cold Steve ignored me at his housewarming party despite me being his date, etc. Well aparantly I gave my business card out to a few guys; after a couple glasses of wine, I don't really remember who I talked to, and the party was really crowded. Anyway, this afternoon I get a phone call from someone who said he met me at that party, and I gave him my card. I have absolutely no memory of who this guy is at all. But he wants to know if I'll have a drink with him tonight. Well, the party was filled with cute boys, and since I doubt I'd give my number to someone objectionable, I figure what the hell, and I agree.

I'm meeting him at 9:00 tonight; I suggested a pretty yuppie but attractive bar that is between our neighborhoods, and he responds with silence, and then says "uh, well I'm a skater, do I have to get dressed up?" I let him pick a more low-key bar. So I know he's a tattooed Asian (he told me this on the phone) skater boy... my type?? Hell yeah!!! At the very least it will be a pleasant drink I guess, but I'm excited about my mystery date...

I'll report back tomorrow, natch.

― Sean, Thursday, 13 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Ok, so it's all about me, but in a spirit of inclusiveness: Blind Dates: Classic or Dud?

― Sean, Thursday, 13 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

peter studies russian lit- i met him at a profs office, it was random and we have had drinks and lunch so far.

― anthony, Thursday, 13 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Alright, so he's very nice, interesting, different, and good looking, but I'm not sure I feel that physical attraction thing. Nonetheless, I agreed to go out with him Saturday, so we'll see. No, really, he's very attractive. But doesn't that knowing if you feel that sexy vibe thing become aparant almost immediately?

I know all this isn't as interesting as me talking about sandwiches.

― Sean, Friday, 14 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

But this is about a tongue sandwich.

If you don't feel an initial vibe...well, just see what happens when it's the weekend and you're both more relaxed all around. :-)

― Ned Raggett, Friday, 14 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

My Mum used to give me tounge sandwiches all the time when I was little, but now I don't live at home I rarely get them.

― Pete, Friday, 14 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I was talking about this with a friend tonight. She calls it the Oomph Factor and she reckons if it's not there then there is no point in pursuing the whole thing.

I'm confused about it myself. I've gone out a few times with a girl I really like and there is no Oomph Factor there but every time I see her I find her a bit more attractive due to her personality and how well we get along and so I think that it may be worth continuing.

Ultimately the problem with Oomph Factor is that it can wear off but perhaps attraction based on really liking the person does not wear off?

― toraneko, Friday, 14 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

toraneko, agreed. sometimes the oomph factor may not be an immediate thing, but as you grow to like someone more and more, the oomph can slowly metamorphosize into being, in such a way that you might not even really notice how it came to be there

― gareth, Friday, 14 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

oomph factor surely belied by those ppl who are completely best platonic mates for YEARS then suddenly realise what everyone ELSE always knew — a la harry and sally — that they are "made for each other" and they get together happily e.a. (my best married fwends did this, inc.eve-of-wedding panic affair/breakup)

― mark s, Friday, 14 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

What about the oompah lumpah factor?

― N., Friday, 14 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

when did n and pete become the same person?

― gareth, Friday, 14 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

the oomph can slowly metamorphosize into being

I agree theoretically that this can happen, I just don't think it's happened to me. Question: if this is a person who you don't work with/go to school with/see on a regular basis anyway, what are you doing together while you wait and see if the Oomph Factor kicks in? Just hanging out as friends? And then you have to transition into dating? It's certainly easier if you feel that oomph right away, that way there's no ambiguity in your mind. And it's exciting, too. I don't discount the possibility of more deep/enduring relationships possibly growing out of being friends first (if that's really what's being suggested), it's just in my experience it's hard to make it happen that way.

she reckons if it's not there then there is no point in pursuing the whole thing.

Like, yeah. Or at least that's what I'm inclined to believe. I did dream about him last night, though. But not in an erotic way.

― Sean, Friday, 14 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

yeah, sean in your situation you're right, it wouldn't work that way. anyway, when it happened to me it ruined everything anyway!

― gareth, Friday, 14 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I'm not convinced that it counts as a blind date because you can't remember what he looks like because you were drunk, even if you were blind drunk.

I only remember going on one proper blind date (do you have a friend for my friend style). I saw her a few more times and had some fun but it amounted to nothing and fizzled. I'd be up for such things if I believed that the person setting it up a) wasn't likely to be just jerking me around, and b) had some idea of what kind of person I was.

― Martin Skidmore, Friday, 14 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

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