Celebrity Autographs

Message Bookmarked

Bookmark Removed

Have you ever tried to get a celebrity's autograph? Have you been blanked? What crappy signed merchandise have you got?

― Graham, Thursday, 2 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

In November i am going to four momus gigs. I want a signed photo with him. Does this make me a pathetic fanboy.

― anthony, Friday, 3 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I think autographs are pointless. Unless they signed adoption papers and you can live in their mansions. The new thing is collecting famous people's email addresses.

― nathalie (nathalie), Friday, 3 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I have Roger Clemens' autograph on a baseball from a 1986 spring training game. Maybe I should burn it on Mount Everest or something.

― Tracer Hand, Friday, 3 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

i've got a signed roxette t-shirt, plus a signed shirt with melissa tkaut's autograph among others...sad really.

― Geoff, Friday, 3 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

nathalie - whose have you got?

― duane, Friday, 3 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

As a kid & a dumbass I got some cricket autographs. Biggest names were Ian Botham & David Gower. All were v. cordial (must've been early in the tour).

― AP, Friday, 3 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

have never asked a celebrity for an autograph, but have went to a roald dahl book signing when i was young. queued for ages and when i finally got to the front he was this smelly old man who spelled my name wrong (or right, depending upon your point of view).

― kevan, Friday, 3 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

"have went"?

― kevan, Friday, 3 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

The only autograph I ever got was of TJ Robinson. Who was a basketball player. I don't like basketball, I have no idea why I did this... I too frown on the autograph fandom obsessive thing, I prefer the shaking hands thing and never washing my hands. It's also a pretty poor excuse for uncleanliness... "Dale Winton shook that I'll never wash it again!"... or something...

― Martin, Friday, 3 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Duane: too many! Hmm, let's see... Marshall Crenshaw emailed me the other day! He said he had visited Bruges about a decade ago. Other than that? Uh, Clint Conley, that *chick* from Magnetic Fields, Mac from Superchunk, STEVE WYNN,... Those are not collected but I contacted them for Kindamuzik.
The one time I actually asked a musician for an autography was for a friend. I explained at great length how she was from Australia and really admired his music. At the end of my pathetic plea to draw something special on the poster, he said:"What did you say?". I replied:"Uh can you sign this poster please?".

― nathalie (nathalie), Friday, 3 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I have a signed copy of the Jamie Oliver cook book (don't ask). I also have Ed 'Stupot' Stewart's autograph from when I was a tot - Mum tells me I sat on his knee.

My sister was in a shopping centre and saw a bunch of people queueing up to get books signed so she joined, not knowing who the chap was. She gets to the front of the queue and it's an old black guy. She can't afford a book, but he agrees to sign a piece of paper. The shaky signature reads 'Muhammed Ali'. Jammy cow.

― Madchen, Friday, 3 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Oh, and when she got home, she asked us who Muhammed Ali was.

― Madchen, Friday, 3 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Did you stone her?

― Dan Perry, Friday, 3 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Preston North End vs West Bromwich Albion, League Cup 3rd Round replay, November 1980. Ron Atkinson and George Courtney. Beat that, you fools.

― Michael Jones, Friday, 3 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

A few months ago I queued up in the Virgin megastore to get Andy Williams' autograph. It started out as an ironic-namesake kinda thing, but by the time I got to the front of the queue I was really nervous. He was very gracious, but very old, and had a slightly sinister fixed grin... I gave him my card, but he hasn't called. I've got Arthur Lee's autograph, that's probably my favourite. And a switch receipt signed by Noel Gallagher.

― Andrew Williams, Friday, 3 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

no autos, but my sister has got a liam g signed definitely maybe pre- release cd, which she hides at my parents house. heh heh

― gareth, Friday, 3 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Noel Gallagher uses *switch*? Hasn't he got platinum Amex or something a bit more rockstarly?

― Madchen, Friday, 3 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Noel is, of course, a man of the people... :) It was about 4 years ago at Gatwick Airport, my mate was manager of the HMV there. I can even still remember the albums he bought, Lee Scratch Perry "Arkology", David Bowie "74-79" and Ben Harper "Will to Live". Same mate also served Robert Plant, who bought "Forever Changes" after browsing for half an hour with a small blonde lady hanging on his arm... after a brief chat with mate he left with the words, "peace and love man, I'm off to Marrakesh..."

That's living alright.

― Andrew Williams, Friday, 3 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I have no popstar ones but for all you Spurs fans, I have:

Mark Falco, Ozzie Ardiles, Glenn Hoddle, Graham Roberts and a few others I can't remember from when they played a pre-season friendly against Chesterfield.

Oh yeah, and the best one I have, Brian Jacks, superstars king, my big childhood hero :-)

― cabbage, Friday, 3 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I got all the Manics autographs (oh, die of shock already why doncha), but I obviously didn't ask them for it, a friend sent me it. And I bought a signed promo poster off of a friend of a friend who works for Sony. So I have their autographs twice, actually.

That's about it though. I've never asked anyone for their autographs.

― Ally, Friday, 3 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Ozzie Ardiles' son Freddie goes to Warwick Uni. He's a pretty good little player too. When I was visiting a mate there we watched him play, then that night the team went out dressed as international footballers. Someone went as Terry Butcher, someone went as George Best... Guess who went as Ozzie Ardiles? Classic, not dud.

― Greg, Friday, 3 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Madonna doesn't have Platinum either. Saw it on a Ruby Wax program. Ruby was all giddy saying "I have a gold card." Christ, who doesn't these days? Uh Madonna.

― nathalie (nathalie), Friday, 3 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I've got Bill Oddie's autograph. Be jealous, scum!

― DG, Friday, 3 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Last night, Melissa Lefton (who ?) gave me one that said I am a sweet, young boy. Also, I mentioned before the one I got from Grandaddy's singer that said "I Love Prison."

― bnw, Friday, 3 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I have three (three!) signed Vollmann books. He draws little pictures when he signs.

― Sterling Clover, Friday, 3 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I have ALL FIVE SPICERS, so SUCKS to the lot of you. Melanie C is fading cuz she wrote in red, the chump.

Roald Dahl was my dad's mum's sister's husband's brother. The entire family deeply hated him (except poss. his brother, Louie, who I only met twice: he was a v.nice man...)

― mark s, Friday, 3 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Also C. L. R. James...

― mark s, Friday, 3 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Adrienne Rich signed my copy of What Is Found There after I babbled insanely to her how much I loved her work. Quite by accident, I found a used autographed copy of Martin Duberman's Cures for a couple bucks. And stood on line at the now-deceased Posman Books (?) in New York City and got my copy (and the receipt!) of the Mystery Science Theater 3000 Amazing Colossal Episode Guide signed by Trace, Mike, Kevin and Jim. I think there might be others, but I'm not sure. I never ask for autographs except in the context of book signings and what not. Asking for autographs in public strikes me as a tad invasive and anyway I'm usually too damned freaked out about in-the-flesh celebrities to approach them.

― Michael Daddino, Friday, 3 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

let's just cut to what everyone really wants to know: what's trace beaulieu like in real life?

― ethan, Friday, 3 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Pete Rose and Darryl Strawberry both blew me off when I asked for autographs as little kids.

AND LOOK AT WHAT HAPPENED TO THEM!! DON'T FUCK WITH EVIL LITTLE KIDS WHEN THEY WANT YER STINKING AUTOGRAPHS, CELEBRITIES!!

― Tadeusz Suchodolski, Friday, 3 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Trace was the one who took the receipt out of my book and signed it. He was, well...a nice guy, though my memory of the book-signing is colored by the fact that maybe a week later he quit the show, so I remember him being oddly shy and uncomfortable.

― Michael Daddino, Friday, 3 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I am jealous of DG because THE GOODIES was mentalist wonder. My friend Gordon looks a bit like Bill Oddie.

― duane, Friday, 3 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Mark S,

Just curious, why did the entire family hate Roald Dahl?

― Joe, Saturday, 4 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

The general story was that RD wasn't at all a nice man. But I think there might have been some intellectual snobbery going on also: these books are not the kinds of things "we" approve of etc.

― mark s, Saturday, 4 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Great bit abt Roald Dahl in Kingsley Amis's v. nasty 'Memoirs' : Dahl suggests to Amis that he should write a children's book 'cos "That's where the money is today, believe me." Amis replies "I couldn't do it...I don't think I enjoyed children's books much when I was a child myself. I've got no feeling for that kind of thing." Dahl: "Never mind, the little bastards'd swallow it." (Amis goes on to add "Many times in these pages I have put in people's mouths approximations to what they said, what they might well have said, what they said at another time, and a few almost-outright inventions, but that last remark is verbatim.")

To return to this thread, once got Allen Ginsberg to sign my copy of 'Howl' after he performed a free open-air 'gig' in Covent Garden. He was most obliging, and drew a nice flower on the frontispiece. Also went to a great book signing at the old Murder One in Denmark St where James Ellroy and Ruth Rendell were appearing. Ellroy an outrageous performer, and the v. genteel Rendell soon got pissed off and left. Ellroy signed my copy of 'L.A. Confidential' with the phrase 'Blood Rage In A Poodle's Cage!'. And Terry Gilliam also drew me a cartoon during a preview of 'Time Bandits'. My Dad's cousin Joyce was former chairperson of UK Frank Sinatra Fan Club, and she is sitting on small goldmine of Frank letters, pics etc. etc.

― Andrew L, Saturday, 4 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Cabbage: how strange that you should mention Brian Jacks - I very nearly did (in an indirect way) in my entry.

My other main signature-gathering episode of the 1980/81 season was at Burnden Park on the last Saturday of the campaign (Bolton Wanderers 0-3 Luton Town). Me and my schoolchum Mark (whose Dad was running the line that afternoon) were utterly convinced that a curly-haired chap wandering around beneath the stand was Brian Jacks. Two autographs later - great disappointment. It was the Luton goalie. Special prize if anyone can remember who that would've been in May 1981.

― Michael Jones, Saturday, 4 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I have a single signed by Man Or Astro...man?, and I used to have a signed photograph of Basil Brush.

― jel, Saturday, 4 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Various Rangers players from the mid to late eighties. Actually I don't know where they are anymore. I probably even had Davie Cooper's, it'd be nice to think so.

― Ally C, Saturday, 4 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

You must be logged in to post. Please either login here, or if you are not registered, you may register here.