The ILE bar is now open..............

Meet Misu, the bouncer - he'll sort out any trouble. Yes, I know he's a cat.....but he's vicious and not to be tangled with.

*throws Misu a jalapeno pepper to chew on*

Can I get you a drink, Aimless? What would you like?

*C J mixes up a Cosmopolitam for Ned*

Vodka, cranberry, lime and Cointreau, n'est ce pas?

Haven't had a chance to get the stir-sticks printed up with the bar's name yet. Sorry.

I've been half-lurking for a few weeks, but thought I'd jump on in - the water looks lovely and I can't see many sharks.

How's Orange County today? UK has been lovely - lots of sun, traffic jams etc, plus the start of Wimbledon.

It's hard to get anything done at all, what with daytime telly showing tennis, all these ILE threads to read and guffaw at, and....errr....what's that other thing?....oh yes.... work. I remember.

*C J pours herself another G&T, and passes round a bowl of Doritos*

*serves up a Banana Daiquiri*

They put a "g" at the end of words for no reason?? Is it like *g*......as in *grin*??

Otherwise, I'm as lost as you are

Let me have another ginebra con agua tonica, and think about it.

*C J punches a tune on the jukebox*

.......uh-oh......seems to be Punk Revival Night

*starts pogoing to the Buzzcocks, then slips on a carelessly discarded icecube*

The G thing, hmmm, I think Katie or Sarah or Alang might have the explanation!

Well, if you're truly all right, could you fix me a lemonade (American-style lemonade) with a shot of creme de cassis?

Oh, and I'm Julia, from Washington, DC.

Yep, I'm fine. Might be a bit of bruising there tomorrow, and I may have trouble sitting down for a while......but I'll live!

*fixes Julia a lemonade (American style) with a shot of creme de cassis*

Are you still at work, then? What do you do?

*pours two glasses of vodka, Kahlua and cream*

Mmmmmmm..........

Cheers, all! Nice to meet you

I'll take an extra-dry Bombay Sapphire martini while you're pouring...

*C J frowns*

Is "Mang" andything like "Ming"?

*looks mildly confused*

Pours a Bombay Sapphire martininininini for Dan

Care for a cashew nut with that?

"Yes, I'm allowed to drink alcohol, I'm 35, really!..."

*shows his ID, ppl laugh, one Dr. Pepper coming up*

"Mang" means "Man". The ending 'g' is there for comedic emphasis. People have found this to be so amusing that it's been extended to other words ending with '-an'. So, if you see references to "Dang", someone is likely talking about me.

Okay, who wants to explain "Ptee/Ktee"?

I didn't realise I would have to learn a whole new language to understand what's going on here.

I speak a bit of French, German, Spanish and Cantonese.......but I'm lost when it somes to ILE-speak. Maybe I'll just stay very quietly in the corner and hope I don't make a fool of myself.

*passes a Dr Pepper (smirk) to Erik*

Cheers!

Hey Graham, what was that symbol you put in the Bangbus thread, the one that looks like a little package of felt tip markers? Christine "Leafy Dragon" used it too, what does it mean?

Could I have a Bloody Mary with extra celery, CJ? Thanks. I call the hammock.

Tracer, what do you mean you don't have any Redd Kross, what the fuck!?!? Oh, OK, "Silver Machine", will have to do...

*mixes a very very strong Bloody Mary for Arthur*

Careful in the hammock - nothing too acrobatic now - I don't want to have to extract that celery from any orifice. I only have basic first aid knowledge.

Hello Tracer - you don't need to DJ, as the juke box here has every record known to man on it. Grab a barstool and come and chill out instead.

*C J plonks herself down on a barstool, and starts swivelling round very fast on it, just for fun*

Well, it must be going-home-from-work-time for those of you in the States, no? Gone 11pm here, and I'm starting to fade. It's been a long day.

Maybe one for the road, though.

Not old enough, eh lad?

It's OK. It's all make-believe in here. Just don't tell them it was me who served you, OK?

I have my reputation to protect, you understand.

Are you in the UK too?

You won't need to trouble your manservant too much Anthony - Misu (the bar cat) is trained to serve drinks (though he prefers not to go near the jacuzzi, for obvious feline water-hating reasons.

I'd love to sit about and be entertained by some of your ribald stories - I may even come up with an anecdote or two of my own - 'cept it's nearly midnight and I'm a bit cream-crackered so I'll have to leave it for now. *yawns and rubs eyes*. It's been a long day.

*tosses the keys to the bar to Misu*

Hey Misu - keep these good people topped up with drinks and snacks for as long as they want, OK? And be sure to wash up afterwards - I want the bar looking tidy for tomorrow, in case anyone feels like popping back in for a chat again.

*Misu thows a menacing look at C J, and rolls his eyes*

Damn cat. You'd think he owns the place.

Nice to say hello to you guys and gals - hope to catch up with you again tomorrow. The bar will be open all night - and we do a great breakfast starting at 8 o'clock.

*stumbles sleepily upstairs for some shut-eye*

Night night all.........

C J

Looks like there was quite a party here after hours last night - sorry I missed it! I hate it when worky worky encroaches on web-time like that.

So, Duane - an interweb crepe are you? Pleased to meet you (I think). We have chocolate sauce here in abundance, plus strawberry syrup, maple syrup and those little hundreds-and-thousands sugar sprinkles. Feel free to help yourself. Are you a well-tossed crepe? Just wondering.

And Michael - hello.......sorry, no crack cocaine (not my thang, etc) and to be honest I think Le Piat d'Or is a bit dodgy too. Try a sip of this Côtes de Beaune.......I think you'll be subtly amused by it.

A Pina Colada for you, QueenoftheHarpies? No problem......

*C J shreds a couple of fresh pineapples through the juicing machine, and the bar suddenly smells tropical and exotic, and redolent of a Caribbean beach*

*sigh*

Wish it was holiday time.

Ah well, back to work. I'll just have a coffee to get me kick- started this morning.

*C J wipes the bar down, tidies away the empty Doritos packets, and wonders if anyone else will call in to say hello today*

Don't worry about Geoff - Misu The Vicious Bar Cat will keep him in line.

C J : Misu, keep an eye on Geoff......I'm told he's a trouble-maker Misu : Oh, right (smiles slyly and decides to make friends with Geoff and secretly wreak havoc)

What can I get you for breakfast Anthony? The Full English? (the delicious smell of grilled bacon, fried eggs, sausages, mushrooms and hash browns wafts though the bar)........or just a croissant and some of my home made strawberry jam? Help yourself to coffee, btw.

Hello Ktee! *hands over a large tumbler of freshly-squeezed orange juice and a couple of Paracetamol to help the hangover*

I'm still getting over my weekend hangover - went to a brilliant birthday party involving a cool rock-covers band, rather too much wine and a bouncy castle. I'd tell you more about it, but my memory is rather patchy, especially regarding the events after 2am. I expect someone will have photos though. Unfortunately.

I take it you've never played this excellent game?

At the bar with the millennials #bau

say something earnest

milliennials love that

#5
I should slow down but

On #6
So just trolling where I feel most comfortable

You can't hear anything, see anything, smell anything, feel anything, or taste anything, and do not even know where you are or who you are or how you got there

do we really love sincerity or is it just that we like it compared to gen x

it's true, those gen xers are always laying way back on the beanie bag playing with the holes in their jeans, saying they don't care about stuff

us otm

gen ilx

remember mojitos?

I'm a fiend for mojitos

#7
Fuck everyone

it's ok to leave the bar and go home every once in a blue moon iirc

About to enter bar no. 3! 4?

#7
Fuck everyone

― calstars, Saturday, October 29, 2016 2:58 PM (one hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

i can get behind this

wdw calstars

Don't sell yourself

Don't even remember wrltimg this

the only reason millennials are more insufferable than genXers is internet

they also want to order fireball shots at the ile bar

i think they discontinued Aftershock by the time I was old enough to drink

american drinking culture is fucked up beyond belief, tbh, gen x or y

meant to post a sadface :( after that first remark

looks like it's still around actually

goldschlager is ok

Never had HOT DAMN

The bartender is the preacher at the altar of Bob Seger

This color of the hair of this chick next to me is A plus and I would like to talk to her but I’m married with children so what’s the point.

*sigh*

Sexist!

what's wrong with being sexy?

tfw you can answer customer questions about the beer better than the bartender

a few years ago i was in the mood for a gin sling, which i sometimes make at home but rarely ask for at a bar. the bartender had never heard of it, and when they asked me how to make it i couldn't remember the portions of gin and cointreau, and then they carded me!

Outside it might be 2018 but in here Huey Lewis’ “the power of love” has just hit the radio

Gin sling= singapore sling? I would've paused on that too. When I bartended in Hawaii a couple of years ago, I was a little tense about about someone ordering a zombie or grasshopper or some other out of fashion but in fashion for old people vacation drink.

Now on to Winwood’s “Valerie”...heaven by the afternoon light

I'm here!

*orders Hendrick's martini with a twist, looks for boyfriend Jake Gyllenhaal*

it was originally synonymous, i think, but nowadays the singapore sling is more fruity (usually with grenadine or benedictine or pineapple juice or something else), whereas the gin sling is usually more minimal.
xposts

*eyes alfred suspiciously and cards him*

Do they normally serve Hendricks with cucumber that side of the pond? Currently a tinny of Tennants with a shot of aperol in the top..the old union special

Tennents**

big star at the bar

that's cool

I'll just take a good slug of fine Irish whiskey with a spot of water on the side and go sit at that dark table in the back corner. You can join me, if you're in a quiet mood.

6 Guinnii

I'm propped up at the bar drinking a salty dog looking at my phone

Mine's a double Rittenhouse 100 on the rocks. *Contemplates seeing if there's anyone at the bar with whom to flirt, versus going home and watching a Max Linder short*