What to do.

new answers I suppose are what go here.

its not a failure if you go back, being happier is never a failure. but sticking it out is worth doing, you'll be glad you did it. stay in london till you have to go back, make the most of this city - i do know how this city is so unforgiving and makes things as difficult as possible (well, it seems that way anyway), but its fun to live here, and you've only got so long in which you can do that before you have to go back anyway

so, stay. but if you do go back, don't regret it, or think of it as a failure.

Sometimes the easy way out is the appropriate way to go. Gareth's advice is good though. I'd say work out how long you can afford to stay and stay that long.

I don't mean this in a condescending way, but it's only a summer in London: as long as you come through the experience (relatively) sound in body & mind it won't have been a failure.

Anyway Ronan, you can't go until I've given you this Louvin Brothers CD.

I'm still vaguely considering moving to London, but mainly worrying about feeling this way is what's holding me back (plus having only started seriously considering it last week, and thus knowing nothing about it). I think you should stay now you've got this far. If you've got to go back in August then it's only like a month you've got left, so you might as well stay.

I suppose you're the best person to ask whether me moving to London would be a good idea (there's not a lot keeping me here, I don't know anyone). What kind of place have you found to stay?

You say I only hear what I want to You say I talk so all the time so

And I thought what I felt was simple And I thought that I don't belong And now that I am leaving Now I know that I did something wrong 'cause I mised you Yeah yeah, I missed you

You say I only hear what I want to: I don't listen hard, don't pay attention to the distance that you're running To anyone, anywhere I don't understand if you really care, I'm only hearing negative: no, no, no

So I turned the radio on, I turned the radio up And this woman was singing my song: Lover's in love and the other's run away Lover is crying 'cause the other won't stay Some of us hover when we weep for the other who was Dying since the day they were born Well, well, this is not that I think that I'm throwing, but I'm thrown

And I thought I'd live forever, but now I'm not so sure You try to tell me that I'm clever But that won't take me anyhow, or anywhere with you

You said that I was naive and I thought that I was strong I thought, "hey, I can leave, I can leave." Oh, but now I know that I was wrong, 'cause I missed you Yeah, I miss you

You said, "I caught you 'cause I want you and one day I'll let you go "You try to give away a keeper, or keep me 'Cause you know you're just scared to lose And you say, "Stay."

You say I only hear what I want to.

Giving someone advice in the form of Lisa Loeb lyrics: Classic or Dud?

(Alternately: Recoginizing Lisa Loeb on sight: C/D?)

London is not some sort of challenge you pass or fail. It may be something to try, to find out if it suits you. I would try to resist making decisions based on temporary financial difficulties or homesickness. Is the sort of life you want here or in Dublin, or somewhere else entirely? Can you stand to leave your friends behind and make new ones? Is there a chance of making enough money to live here (it's not at all cheap, as you know)?

Bear in mind that no decision or action has to be permanent. Staying longer in London doesn't commit you for life, and returning to Dublin does not preclude a later return to London.

Ronan's lazy when hes lovin', Ronan's lazy when hes plays
Hes lazy in london and bored in every way
Ronan's lazy when hes posting, Ronan's lazy when he walks
Ronan's lazy when hes dancin' and Ronan's lazy when hes IMing
Heeeeeees broke and hes lazy
Ooooh, don't you wanna pay him
Some folks they got money an' some folks lives are sweet
Some folks make decisions an' some folks ask on ILE, now
Imagine what it feels like, imagine how it sounds
Imagine life is perfect an' you dont have to move out
No tears are fallin' from his eyes
Hes keepin' all the pain inside
Now don't you wanna live with him
He needs money to dont go back to Du-bleen
Imagine there's a girlfriend, imagine there's a job
Imagine there's an answer, imagine there's a God
Imagine I'm a Devil, imagine You are a saint
Lazy money, lazy sexy, lazy outta Dublin
Lazy when lookin for work, lazy on the bed
Screamin' all you like, but it only fades away
Hes lazy when hes movin, lazy lookin for job
Got a lazy mind, a lazy eye, a lazy lazy father
Heeeeeees broke and hes lazy
Ooooh, don't you wanna pay him

Sigh..........I've decided to go home. I can't get through to my house but I've talked to my brother and decided to go back to Dublin. I had a great time here and I think I eventually will want to live in London but I just miss my friends too much and the prospect of moving out of my brother's and moving in on my own is too much to take really when I was already feeling a bit down.

I suppose I'll probably fly out before the end of the week sometime, maybe Friday or Saturday, I don't know yet.

As I say I had a cool time over here and it was great to meet those of you who I did meet. You were all very nice to me and the few nights out were a laugh. I'm sure I'll be over the odd weekend in future anyway. I'll probably still be around to go for the pint that was scheduled with some ILXers last week anyway. I'm still feeling a bit odd about all this, a bit of a happy/sad thing.

Pity, though it seems you know what you are doing. But we need to send you off in style - when is the grand piss-up and sending Ronan off in style drinking extravaganza (and can it involve karaoke?)

Of course losing you and Nick in a week will be too much for me to take.

Don't get tears on the beard ptee -- it's unsanitary.

You could always come to Boston, Ro. Except of course it's more expensive to get here, you have no real network of people to hook into, it's a complete bitch to find a job right now and the housing market sucks. Um, never mind.

aw boo ronan i haf only spoke to you fr abt 23 seconds!!

and i not at all!

And I only got glanced at for 3 seconds.

I know it's a bit disappointing and I'm really pissed off. I also just had a telephone conversation with my parents which wasn't too pleasant, lets say, so Dublin doesn't exactly seem like the best place in the world to be either but I know I have to go home. The failure part I was talking about above is manifesting itself in "I knew you were going to come home" conversation which is a bit irritating really.

PS: Sorry Graham! But I did ask if you wanted a drink I think.

So when's the 'pint' scheduled for?

Tomorrow night would probably be best for me if that's not inconvenient, I don't want to be a hassle, I haven't been here that long yet! I'd imagine I'll go on Thursday if that works out cheaper.

heh, its taken one month to learn what it took me 3 years to discover!

(thurs would be better for me as cannot make tomorrow)

Ronan stay! Stay!

(Well don't if you feel miserable, but it would be nice)

I am a bit too miserable. As I say I'm a bit miserable leaving all the people I've been hanging out with here but I can't face living on my own and working in some horrible job where I've nothing to spend the money on anyway. At least in Dublin I can return to being a hedonist or something, although that's one of the worries aswell. Bah I'm very mixed up now, but I think going home feels like more of a solution than staying here.

It's odd that I say the people are the thing that would keep me here, and yet I claim it's my friends at home I miss aswell. Maybe it is just the living on my own and working and paying rent thing that is making me want to leave, in which case it's not really a great excuse.

So is there a pub meet for tomorrow to see Ronan off, then? I think there should be, and I'm up for it if it's in central London.

oops sorry when i said thursday would be better for me i thought that you might go up the PUB on thursday, not actually leave! well if you have a farewell drinkies tonight i'll miss you, but hope you had a good stay and fare thee well!

Don't worry, I won't hold it against you, AT LEAST NOT FOREVER! No seriously don't worry. I'm up for a pint tonight if it suits enough people or if it's not inconvenient, so don't feel obliged to cancel arrangements or to drag yourself out of the house if you're tired or whatever. As I say it's a little bit difficult for me because I feel I should wait and see what my brother wants to do, since I've been living with him and he might be a bit sad to see me go, it was a bit of a surprise to him. It might be fairer to give whatever he has in mind priority, without being rude to any of you guys.

Well, I can check back circa 5pm, and if there is anything on in central or centralish London, I can wander along. We could of course plan a meet and still have it even if Ronan can't make it. Anyone fancy, I guess, the Glasshouse Stores? I could be there 5.30 or 6 or whatever?

Yes, can we meet even if it Ronan can't come? I'm bored and miserable stuck here. I've got to have confirmation that other people will turn up before 3:30 though. I'll start a thread.

That nice boy Baran started a thread already (Arrividerci Ronan).

Yes he did.

I've just found out today I've failed an exam

WAIT! WAIT! I realised 15 percent was an awful mark and mailed Herr Lecturer to say what the hell is this and he mailed back and says well we never recieved a project or a methodology report but of course this is the fault of THE MAN and not me and I've pointed the the virtual location of the project. Hey even Mitch can back me up, I made that website on time! He saw it! So now I reckon I have a good chance of passing. Still going home but considering my telephone conversation with les parents yesterday included me telling I'd failed but was going to email the lecturer and them saying "oh of course, you couldn't have failed could you" I will get some moral ground at least. Provided I pass. But I reckon after me getting quite emotional just now in the reply he will realise I've been messed around a bit.

Then at least there is some good to come out of it. :-) Just be back in London whenever I come through town next! ;-)

Ronan, are you in London to make money or are you in London to have character building experiences?

If the latter, you've probably had enough character building experiences, so you might as well go home if you are getting a bit fed up of the place.

But if you are there to make money: well, just bear in mind that you didn't go there to be happy, you went there to make money. So get a loathsome job that pays you money - like being a security guard or something like that - and make money and be miserable. but then when you are back in college you will have loads of money you will have loads of money and will be able to impress all the fly honeys in DCU. So then you will be happy. Ho ho ho.