twee-est major professional sport (UK)

ALL OF THEM

Professional tennis in the UK is pretty twee, and my limited knowledge of field hockey suggests that it's twee as fuck, but this has gotta be the Britishes Baseball, right?

^beat me to it

No way. Tweeness is in direct propertion to poshness of participants, with cricket as the mysterious exception. Or just listen to the commentators. It's golf v rugby v tennis.

Which top commentators' notable idiosyncracies include lengthy discussion of the homemade cakes they've been sent by listeners NO DON'T TELL ME I KNOW THIS ONE

yeah rugby...watch living with lions

Gah, you've got a point there xp.

It can't possibly be darts, but then it does use the tiniest little pieces of equipment, and the fans do wave these horrible little homemade messages whenever the camera comes near.

Golf & Rugby (Union) = continuation of corporate board room bullshit by other means, Tennis = board room dudes on their day off. Business guys too busy being EVIL to be twee.

http://www.dennistaylor.co.uk/images/dennnis-taylor-image.jpg

is there really anything twee-er?

Darts: Yeah, there's nothing twee-er than downing 20 pints of Carling then dancing on yr table wearing a viking helmet and not much else.

I don't intend to ever visit a golf club, but from what I have heard of their rules there is none more twee.

Poncing around in a cardigan while people eat strawberries and cream and drink Pimms = Sinister picnic in full effect. Tennis ftw.

http://static.guim.co.uk/Guardian/lifeandstyle/gallery/2008/jun/25/fashion.tennis/RogerFerderer-9676.jpg

Darts is absolutely as far removed from twee as you can get. Well, darts crowds are anyway. Trust me, I was in one last week. (haha xpost)

continuation of boardroom what? boardrooms are not twee.

rugby is way worse than what you see on the pitch. in that living with lions documentary from 97 one of the players nearly dies on the treatment table. plus there's standard shit like forwards getting 3 syringes full of blood extracted from each ear at the end of the game etc.

i don't like a sport does not equal it's twee....

Darts: Yeah, there's nothing twee-er than downing 20 pints of Carling then dancing on yr table wearing a viking helmet and not much else.

Getting a real 'cynical teens at Hullabalooza' moment here tbh

Not impressed by any manly credentials rugby may or may not have - I listened to Bill McLaren's commentary for years. (see also: Peter Alliss)

My malformed point was that Rugby isn't twee, but I also have to point out that my class war anti-Union rants only apply to the game as it is lol "played" in England, and England players seem to be big into their corporate management tie-in book crossovers. Of course boardrooms aren't twee, they're full of ex-Rugby players being twats.

http://soccernet.espn.go.com/archive/images/2002wc/history/johnhist/94/EMP_BEBETO_BABY_325513.JPG.jpg

Not British as such, but to my mind this is the zenith of twee.

not bigging up boardrooms but yeah they aren't twee. league is pretty twee compared to union tho, lets all run and run and abandon the horrible scrum and lineout.

but neither are as twee as tennis.

cricket is sort of twee and golf is too, but I dunno, golf seems more just quaint than twee.

Rugby is gay, not twee.

I take it there's no professional croquet or badminton or bowls, then, eh?

dude you wanna make croquet major, you come here and spread the word

In terms of tweeness - field hockey > grass court tennis > golf > cricket > other tennis > football > rugby >>>>>>>>> snooker >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> darts

http://images.mirror.co.uk/upl/m4/dec2008/1/5/148F985B-0F8B-049A-E64109C1B59F430C.jpg

Croquet would win this thread in a heartbeat if it was a major professional sport.

Curling's pretty twee, but it only major once a lifetime, so meh.

Fuck, yeah, bowls is a good shout though.

Rugby League is pretty twee now you mention it, probably more so than League, but not because it incorporates actual running with and passing the ball so much as because of its self-conscious family image, Union still feels pretty blokey. Also some of the twee-est cheerleading/pre-match entertainment I've ever seen has been at League games.

"probably more so than Union" i meant

I fuckin' love croquet. Such a 'civilized' yet thoroughly heartless 'sport'.

Surely we can claim boxing too? Suspect tennis is probably tweeer though.

It's funny how I think of bowls as twee but not bocce or petannque.

croquet is the nastiest, cruellest sport of all time, and each kill is delivered apologetically, with a subtle movement and a smile

Croquet designed for bright young things in flapper dresses to make cutting remarks to each other and then underline it by walloping their opponents ball off the green.

That's still kinda twee, tbh

Golf. If Ronnie Corbett plays it, it's as twee as a bee.

Boxing is usually too tragic to be really twee. Big lummoxes raised in abject poverty 'saved' by local athletic clubs/trainers and then twenty years later they can barely even slur.

yeah i was gonna say, my description doesn't prevent it from being twee, and if anything makes it more so

Bowls = game for members of the Womens Institute to play in between jam-making and casual racism. Twee as fuck.

Petannque = game for chain-smoking old French men to play in between drinks and casual letching. The darts of France.

That's still kinda twee, tbh

Kinda? Uber-twee!

wtf how is romario twee?

Actually, I just remembered I used to work with a guy who bowled competitively, and he was rough as fuck and would kill you if you accused him or his sport of being twee, so, maybe not bowls. But, y'know, it's gentle, and old women in tweed skirts play it, and that guy with the Sherlock Holmes pipe.

some xposts.

The darts of France.

Fcuk! You're right!

http://pacejmiller.files.wordpress.com/2009/09/manny-pacquiao1.jpg

A big lummox, earlier today

Romario: that fucking celebration - you wouldn't catch Bert Trautmann doing that

For me, waterpolo is the twee-est sport of all:

http://www.monroegallery.com/showcase/images/Waterpolo.jpg

michael that's a bit reductive re: boxing

bowls is slightly twee but not nearly as twee as croquet - it isn't kooky enough to be truly up there, and it's a bit too self-effacing

water polo is violent as fuck and not twee in any way

Crown Green bowls is definitely not twee.

yeah i'd say if i ranked them all and included bowls it'd be bottom-half for sure - like darts it's quite 'get on with it and play your shot' hardman nothing-spoken

altho i <3 it (like every other sport here) i am probably going to vote golf because of ivor robson

also not twee:

Hare Coursing
Shinty
Shin Kicking
Anything with "Shin" in it, basically

xp and loads of other reasons like how peter alliss is still a commentator and the whole vernacular of the game but mostly ivor robson

1) Has anyone in the whole of British History said 'Field Hockey' for 'Hockey'?

2) Am I alone in thinking B&S is the obvious winner?

everyone calling cricket twee has never played or understood cricket

But twee in the "in the self-consciously-harking-back-to-a-fey-golden-age way that baseball is in the states"?

I don't believe it myself, but it has more of that going on than, say, darts

cricket never harks back to a golden age unless we're talking about the west indies team RIP ;_;

it loves talking about times past and regurgitating facts, figures and anecdotes, but of all the major sports it has done perhaps the most to modernise and radicalise itself in the face of change - it looks forward like a motherfucker

as for the game as it is played, by we the people, well it's not so much twee as ultra-competitive and fraternal

http://images.theage.com.au/ftage/ffximage/2009/07/08/ponting_ashes_URN_wideweb__470x343,0.jpg

That trophy looks suspiciously twee to me. Added points for Jennings-esque schoolboy attire.

Also they take a break for afternoon tea, possibly including iced buns on paper doilies and sandwiches with the crusts cut off.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/olmedia/910000/images/_910638_7cricket300.jpg

"you sayin' we're twee, man?"

the ashes urn (i.e. the trophy itself) is by a comfortable margin the twee-est going concern in english cricket

much as the baggy green (the hat he is wearing in that photo) is BACM the twee-est going concern in autralian cricket

your photo is unfair

cricket rly isn't twee, the larger part of its following is laddish and provincial afaik, and considered purely in formal terms it's elegant and corinthian

Unfair? That's the high point of test cricket! xp

ricky ponting is about as twee as liver cancer

twee break is because ppl be tired after 2 hours in the field and maybe fancy a drink/bite to eat/rest

nakhchivian = valuable and OTM new poster

yeah NickB but you've chosen the twee-est possible photo relating to the Ashes and held it as representative, also India-Australia has been the pinnacle of Test Cricket for several years now

hahahahahaha dude XD

Don't let them fool you, Aussies are twee

^^ (ty)

http://www.rebelsport.com.au/ecom/rebel/artwork/product_images/large/1534001560003000.jpg

Go Ricky!

aussies are twee about:

-the baggy green
-AFL (mostly goal umpires' attire)
-state of origin rugby league

but generally they are fucking hard-nosed and desperate about everything else

australia is the very antipode of twee
that teddy bear is probably stuffed with heroin and going through bangkok customs

fucking hard-nosed desperation is the ideal breeding ground for twee

i'd like some concrete examples of australian tweeness, and how it diverges from 'sentimentality', please

http://showclix.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2008/07/dameedna.jpg

Ew strewth, luv!

fine

* insert pic of inanely grinning man in silly green cap holding world's tiniest sporting trophy *

http://www.costumebox.com.au/images/P/Khaki-Slouch-Hat-detail-DSC.jpg

cricket is a twee version of baseball and baseball is the tweest sport in the US!

dammit ken

baseball is 500x twee-er than cricket and it isn't even the twee-est US sport

Related Words for : twee
dainty, mincing, niminy-piminy, prim

tennis is definitely the most niminy-piminy.

No namby-pamby, no credibility

Quidditch is pretty damn namby-pamby. My childhood encyclopaedia featured similar things which may or may not be real - eton wall game, real tennis, etc.

dainty, mincing, niminy-piminy, prim

This does sound like the tail-end of the Eton 1st XI batting order tbh.

Or the next Tory cabinet

Twee = any sport that you have to iron your clothes for

Also cable-stitch jumpers.

http://static.guim.co.uk/sys-images/Sport/Pix/columnists/2009/5/18/1242684508088/A-typical-village-cricket-001.jpg

Not twee at all. Oh no.

Bravo Monty!

well there isn't normally a bloke with a dress in the middle of the field.

baseball is 500x twee-er than cricket and it isn't even the twee-est US sport
― queen of the rapping scene (acoleuthic), Thursday, 4 March 2010 13:49 (17 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

baseball people can hit balls with a wooden stick. cricket people uses half a door and still miss.

Blokes in dresses is more rugby union (xp)

in that photo, countless grudges, aspirations and differing opinions are brewing

belle and sebastian vs camera obscura

Also a nice pot of tea. x-post

haha

For me, this probably comes down to golf knitwear vs. cricket knitwear

http://lyrics-keeper.com/pics/H/a/i/Haircut-100-1-big.jpg

^ why did no-one tell me that Richard Madely was in Haircut 100?

Curly Watts on the right-hand side too

Always thought of them as a cricket jumper band, going for more of a romo-tennis look there I suppose though.

Trouser legs tucked into white socks in dark shoes is SUCH a good look. Please revive.

Automatic thread bump. This poll is closing tomorrow.

Automatic thread bump. This poll's results are now in.

ohhhhh screw all y'all