I Can't Believe I Ever Did That

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Presuming that your adolescence is something of a distant memory, what past actions or attitudes do you look back on with astonishment or shame? My own example: Once as a teenager while my parents were overseas for a month I was left behind in Middlesbrough to look after the house. By the end of the third week I'd blown all my food allowance on drink and drugs. This wasn't a great problem for me because there was still a week's supply of pot noodles in the cupboard. Unfortunately the family cat was not so happy about sharing these and began to yowl incessantly for its more accustomed Kit-E-Kat, so for the remaining few days (and I'm not proud of this) I kept it subdued by feeding it quarter portions of Temazepam tablets and carried on partying without interruption. I was a somewhat twisted teenager I fear.

― scott, Friday, 8 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

summer of '94. I'm 17 years old. Word is out that there is a party in some blokes house down the road. I rob a bottle of vodka from my parents liqour cabinet. I go to the party and scoff the vodka in an hour and wash it down with a couple of cans of Linden Village. I go to the toilet but smash the whole toilet bowl (I'm still not sure how) and it floods the entire floor of the house. The cops are called and everyone flees. Some cop shines a flashlight in my face and I kick it out of his hand. He punches me to the ground and then he asks my name. I say "Mise Eire". He takes me down to my parents house and my parents put me to bed. I jump out my bedroom window (two stories up and I have a scar in the side of my arse too) and run up the village looking for a botle of vodka I've already drank wearing a baseball cap, a string vest and a pair of y-fronts. I thump the door of the house screaming "WHERES MY VODKA!!" at the top of my voice until my brother comes to my rescue. I was a rather stupid boy in those days.

― Michael, Friday, 8 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Psh, I look back on like two weeks ago with astonishment, never mind when I was a kid, christ almighty. I still can't believe me and Ramon got into a fight about whether or not the Manics were better than Turbonegro which resulted in him apparently feeling me up, me slashing my arm (with a butter knife, hello idiot) and him puking all in my sink with a towel on his head. I mean, really, the entire fight was about how both bands are the same because they wore sailor costumes, was it really worth it? I say yes, but no one else who was at the shindig agrees with me. I don't really remember much of it occurring, we drank an entire bottle of Goldschlager together and it really didn't do much for our mental conditions. I also apparently tried unsuccessfully in my wobbly state to beat up Fred Solinger, which I'm sure plenty of people will agree is a worthy cause.

Poor Fred, we all make so much fun of him.

I once punched a girl who was half blind. I had no idea she was half blind when I did it, she like lunged at me and started clawing me for no reason. Her sister, who was a friend of mine, told me afterwards that she was blind. That's pretty much the only thing I've ever done I really felt shamed about. I mean, I had no idea, but still! Everyone thought it was the funniest thing, I STILL can't live it down, whenever I get into a fight with someone now my dad cracks jokes about any possible physical handicap they might have - "Why don't you kick him in his bruised knee? HAHAHAHAHA!" I'm like, dude, knock it off, I didn't know. It's really embarassing. It totally ruined all the times I've punched people with perfect vision, because no one cares now, they just talk about that one incident.

― Ally, Friday, 8 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

I dont know why Fred gets so much stick. Someone who digs the Bee Gees and Richard Harris obviously rocks.

― Michael, Friday, 8 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

He doesn't have to worry about me "picking on" him again, that's for sure.

― Nicole, Friday, 8 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

The Bee Gees and Richard Harris should all be beaten with sticks.

― Ally, Friday, 8 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Richard Harris is a god. Let me explain: 1/ He has a superhuman resistance to Guiness 2/ He drank with Peter O' Tolle and Ollie Reed. More Wolf Pack than Rat Pack 3/ He's the Bull McCabe-"Burd, did u tayke da mate outa dees sandweges" 4/ He's still on speaking terms with all 7 ex-wives 5/ His performance in "A sporting life" 6/ He's from Limerick

― Michael, Friday, 8 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

I would just rather beat people using the Bee Gees as sticks.

― Nicole, Friday, 8 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Beating people using the Bee Gees as sticks does kill two birds with one stone, so to speak. Good idea, sorry I didn't think of that one.

Regarding Richard Harris, I was really just being snide, I have no problem with him besides his musical career.

― Ally, Friday, 8 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

I once told a girlfriend that her aunt looked like she'd been designed by HR Giger. I'd do it again, though.

― DG, Friday, 8 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

i was a member of the communist youth leauge from the ages of 15 to 20. I do not regret that though.

― anthony (anthony), Friday, 8 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

I bet they had good pub crawls too.

― Michael, Friday, 8 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

It was a mailorder thing. Being a lonley farmboy i liked to shock the postmasters and my mother.

― anthony, Friday, 8 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Thinking Taylor Parkes would take me in to live at his flat without being suspicious about where I'd come from and whether my parents knew ...

(The above is quite genuine. If Taylor reads this, rest assured that I literally *cannot* believe it of myself. I was unspeakably depressed when I was 15 or 16, to understate things.)

― Robin Carmody, Friday, 8 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

go my hair cut like patrick strangelove because i girl i'd just started to see loved strangelove. it lasted about another 2 weeks. she was cute, though...

― gareth, Saturday, 9 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

More things than I care to count. Sometimes, when I look back, I simply cannot account for the fact that I survived my late teens to early 20s. It truly is against all odds. I deserve a Darwin prize or something. ;-)

― masonic boom, Saturday, 9 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

I once sent a naked picture of myself to a random woman who was chatting up one of my roommates because of a dare. I'm still not sorry (although my wife gets REALLY annoyed when I tell the story, despite the fact that it happened before we started dating).

― Dan Perry, Wednesday, 20 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

That is easily the best thing I've heard all day.

― Ally, Wednesday, 20 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

When I was dopey little student I once drew £30 out of a cash machine but forgot to take the money with me. Extremely stupid, rather than shameful.

― Johnathan, Wednesday, 20 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Ha, I once left a wallet with $200 in it in a bar. Ian White and Otis Wheeler can vouch for this. I got my wallet back, but not the cash. I totally made them accomapny me back to the bar at 3 am to retrieve my wallet, it was almost worth the $200 to see th elook on their faces when I explained to them, no , Ican't pay for this cab from Second Ave/4th St to 67th and Columbus, because my wallet is gone. It's like, uh, yeah, hello, dumbass.

― Ally, Thursday, 21 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Oh god... the mixtapes... the mixtapes...

― JM, Thursday, 21 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Wimborne Minster, 5.00 pm, Sunday 4th March 2001.

― Robin Carmody, Thursday, 21 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

six months pass...

I'm reviving this thread in honor of Michael carrotbourke's story at the top of the page.

I adore this story.

― Nancy Drew, Friday, 18 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

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