1 - new age piano
2 - a narrator with a voice like a telephone sex stalker
3 - reverb and echo
― Check this, in fact. How exciting. He literally cuts the mustard. (snoball), Saturday, 1 May 2010 09:16 (fifteen years ago)
4. Kai's Power Tools filter set for Photoshop
― Elvis Telecom, Saturday, 1 May 2010 09:18 (fifteen years ago)
5 - Manchurian Candidate type shit
You are completely relaxed... (relaxed)On Tuesday... (Tuesday)You will go the the train station... (train station)And open locker number 54... (54)Inside will be a box... (a box)Inside the box will be a sniper rifle... (sniper rifle)
― Check this, in fact. How exciting. He literally cuts the mustard. (snoball), Saturday, 1 May 2010 09:18 (fifteen years ago)
6. Tide surging up a shingly beach
― Daily Sport Stunna Yasmin Alibhai Brown (Noodle Vague), Saturday, 1 May 2010 09:18 (fifteen years ago)
7. Address of record label: Sedona, AZ
― Elvis Telecom, Saturday, 1 May 2010 09:19 (fifteen years ago)
8 - long pauses to drag out the playing time
― Check this, in fact. How exciting. He literally cuts the mustard. (snoball), Saturday, 1 May 2010 09:19 (fifteen years ago)
9 - countdowns
― Check this, in fact. How exciting. He literally cuts the mustard. (snoball), Saturday, 1 May 2010 09:20 (fifteen years ago)
10. Gentle snores as you fall asleep 1.7 minutes in
― Daily Sport Stunna Yasmin Alibhai Brown (Noodle Vague), Saturday, 1 May 2010 09:21 (fifteen years ago)
11 - a warning not to listen to the tape while driving or operating heavy machinery
― Check this, in fact. How exciting. He literally cuts the mustard. (snoball), Saturday, 1 May 2010 09:21 (fifteen years ago)
12 - Scandinavian black metal where the tape has been re-used
― Check this, in fact. How exciting. He literally cuts the mustard. (snoball), Saturday, 1 May 2010 09:22 (fifteen years ago)
13. Photo of self-help guru on back of case reveals he is a fat fucker with a cig hanging out of his mouth
― Daily Sport Stunna Yasmin Alibhai Brown (Noodle Vague), Saturday, 1 May 2010 09:23 (fifteen years ago)
14 - xxxp derisive laughter from yourself as you realise how silly this is
― Check this, in fact. How exciting. He literally cuts the mustard. (snoball), Saturday, 1 May 2010 09:24 (fifteen years ago)
15 - extreme anger from having paid £15 for an anger management tape that turned out to be a load of bollocks
16. Dude out of Whitehouse gets a production credit
― Daily Sport Stunna Yasmin Alibhai Brown (Noodle Vague), Saturday, 1 May 2010 09:26 (fifteen years ago)
17 - some pervert saying "deeper and deeper and deeper"
― Check this, in fact. How exciting. He literally cuts the mustard. (snoball), Saturday, 1 May 2010 09:43 (fifteen years ago)
18. "By no accounts should this CD be played in a moving vehicle"
― hey it's (jel --), Saturday, 1 May 2010 10:17 (fifteen years ago)
19 - warning that this tape should not be used as a substitute for seeing a professional therapist
― Check this, in fact. How exciting. He literally cuts the mustard. (snoball), Saturday, 1 May 2010 10:23 (fifteen years ago)
20 - the tape is for "quitting smoking", but the language is so generic that you start to suspect that the exact same tape is sold under different titles ("Stop Drinking"/"Quit Drugs"/"Stop Binge Eating"/etc.)
― Check this, in fact. How exciting. He literally cuts the mustard. (snoball), Saturday, 1 May 2010 10:24 (fifteen years ago)
21 - the "stop procrastination" tape works, but for the wrong reason. Instead of having the causes of your procrastination removed under hypnotic suggestion or whatever, you end up thinking "oh FFS snoball, just man up and get the fuck on with it instead of wasting time with this new age crap"
― Check this, in fact. How exciting. He literally cuts the mustard. (snoball), Saturday, 1 May 2010 10:28 (fifteen years ago)
22 - Extended Bassline Megamix on Side 2
― Daily Sport Stunna Yasmin Alibhai Brown (Noodle Vague), Saturday, 1 May 2010 10:31 (fifteen years ago)
23 - the only other CD that refers to "blissful trance" outside of a Ministry of Sound compilation
― Check this, in fact. How exciting. He literally cuts the mustard. (snoball), Saturday, 1 May 2010 10:33 (fifteen years ago)
24 - "Listen to my voice. Listen to my voice. Shoot the traitor."
― Check this, in fact. How exciting. He literally cuts the mustard. (snoball), Sunday, 2 May 2010 13:21 (fifteen years ago)
25 - warnings to never listen to the tape while driving. EVERY ONE has this!
26 - Walking down a "long, glistening, golden staircase" that only has 10 steps.
― Viceroy of the Daleks (Viceroy), Sunday, 2 May 2010 17:24 (fifteen years ago)
^^ I see 25 has already been covered, nm!
― Viceroy of the Daleks (Viceroy), Sunday, 2 May 2010 17:25 (fifteen years ago)
27 -- Stock photo of a cloudy sunset.
― This is four-dimensional art; the 4th dimension is incredibly powerful. (Abbott), Sunday, 2 May 2010 17:26 (fifteen years ago)
28 -- photo of bearded hypnotist dressed in cableknit turtleneck & giant '80s glasses frames.
― This is four-dimensional art; the 4th dimension is incredibly powerful. (Abbott), Sunday, 2 May 2010 17:27 (fifteen years ago)
xxp Done twice already even! But appropriate as...
29 - the tape asks you the same question (ie, "Why... do you... want it???") over and over and over again.
― Check this, in fact. How exciting. He literally cuts the mustard. (snoball), Sunday, 2 May 2010 17:28 (fifteen years ago)
and of course,
30 - "EMPHASIZING certain words AS IF that had any kind of SUBLIMINAL effect at ALL."
― Viceroy of the Daleks (Viceroy), Sunday, 2 May 2010 17:38 (fifteen years ago)
31 - asking you to visualise putting your bad habits into a box and then putting a lock on the box and driving out into the desert and then digging a hole and then dropping the box into the hole and then etc., etc., etc..
― Check this, in fact. How exciting. He literally cuts the mustard. (snoball), Sunday, 2 May 2010 17:40 (fifteen years ago)
...basically a whole long list of things to do with this box full of bad habits, or something like "put it on a rocket, launch the rocket into space, then imagine you're at home, watching the TV news about the rocket in space, then imagine that you're looking at the back of your head as you watch the TV, then imagine that you're outside and looking through the window of your living room at the back of your head as you look at the back of your head as you watch the TV news blah blah blah".
― Check this, in fact. How exciting. He literally cuts the mustard. (snoball), Sunday, 2 May 2010 17:43 (fifteen years ago)
32. a subliminal text on the sleeve that reads brad whitford's impotent rage, no matter what, you can never own enough self-hypnosis tapes
― brad whitford's impotent rage (underrated aerosmith albums I have loved), Sunday, 2 May 2010 17:44 (fifteen years ago)
Imagine a self hypnosis tape narrated by William Shatner...
― Check this, in fact. How exciting. He literally cuts the mustard. (snoball), Sunday, 2 May 2010 17:51 (fifteen years ago)
you guys are making me really want to listen to my first self-hypnosis tape btw
― Doctor Casino, Sunday, 2 May 2010 18:03 (fifteen years ago)
31 - the way you suddenly jump up off the sofa and shout "WARARAAAAAARRRGHHH!!!!" when the tape clicks off.
― Check this, in fact. How exciting. He literally cuts the mustard. (snoball), Sunday, 2 May 2010 18:05 (fifteen years ago)