POLL: Best line spoken by Mr. Bookman (Philip Baker Hall) in the Seinfeld episode "The Library" (the greatest scene in sitcom history)

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MF2gZu3ygEQ

Poll Results

OptionVotes
Well I got a flash for ya, joy-boy: 8
You and your good-time buddies. 5
Flashy, making the scene, flaunting convention. 3
and finding drawings of pee-pees and wee-wees on the Cat in the Hat and the Five Chinese Brothers? 3
You buy a jar of Folgers Crystals, you put it in the cupboard, you forget about it. 3
Or: maybe that turns you on, Seinfeld; maybe that's how y'get your kicks. 2
It lasts forever. It's freeze-dried. Freeze-dried Crystals. 2
Yeah, '71. That was my first year on the job. Bad year for libraries. 2
But you put on a pair of shoes when you walk into the New York Public Library, fella. 2
Maybe we can live without libraries, people like you and me. Maybe. 1
You think this is all a big joke, don't you? 1
You're a comedian, you make people laugh. 1
Well, let me tell you something, funny boy. 1
Look, if you think this is about overdue fines and missing books, you'd better think again. 1
Well, let me give you a hint, junior. 1
Sure, we're too old to change the world, but what about that kid, 0
sitting down, opening a book, right now, in a branch at the local library 0
Doesn't HE deserve better? 0
This is about that kid's right to read a book without getting his mind warped! 0
Party time is over. 0
You got seven days, Seinfeld. 0
You got any coffee? 0
Yeah, I know what you're thinking. What's this guy making such a big stink about old library books? 0
Sure, go ahead, laugh if you want to. I've seen your type before: 0
Yeah. Coffee. 0
Yeah, you don't drink coffee? How about instant coffee? 0
You don't have any instant coffee? 0
Who doesn't have instant coffee? 0
Then later on when you need it, it's there. 0
You took this book out in 1971. 0
Bad year for America. Hippies burning library cards, Abbie Hoffman telling everybody to steal books. 0
I don't judge a man by the length of his hair or the kind of music he listens to. Rock was never my bag. 0
I saw you on TV once. I remembered your name. From my list. I looked it up. Sure enough, it checked out. 0
You think because you're a celebrity that somehow the law doesn't apply to you, that you're above the law? 0
You know that little stamp, the one that says "New York Public Library"? 0
Well that may not mean anything to you, but that means a lot to me. One whole hell of a lot. 0
That is one week! 0


Mr. Snrub, Tuesday, 1 June 2010 18:50 (fifteen years ago)

ARRRGH!! FUCK YOU "EMBEDDING DISABLED BY REQUEST"!!!!

Mr. Snrub, Tuesday, 1 June 2010 18:55 (fifteen years ago)

voted for pee-pees and wee-wees over good-time buddies

Truollmas (some dude), Tuesday, 1 June 2010 18:56 (fifteen years ago)

Toughest poll choice ever. Had to go with joy-boy in the end.

no more springs no more summers no more falls (sunny successor), Tuesday, 1 June 2010 18:58 (fifteen years ago)

the 2nd part is awesome

Zeno, Tuesday, 1 June 2010 18:58 (fifteen years ago)

has to be good time buddies

Don't look at the finger (Ste), Tuesday, 1 June 2010 19:52 (fifteen years ago)

But you put on a pair of shoes when you walk into the New York Public Library, fella.

franny glass, Tuesday, 1 June 2010 20:10 (fifteen years ago)

four weeks pass...

Automatic thread bump. This poll is closing tomorrow.

System, Tuesday, 29 June 2010 23:01 (fifteen years ago)

"Or: maybe that turns you on, Seinfeld; maybe that's how y'get your kicks."

nickn, Wednesday, 30 June 2010 01:12 (fifteen years ago)

'You buy a jar of Folgers Crystals, you put it in the cupboard, you forget about it.'

This, or you voted wrong.

Popture, Wednesday, 30 June 2010 01:15 (fifteen years ago)

I can't explain it, but the delivery of "freeze-dried crystals" in "It lasts forever. It's freeze-dried. Freeze-dried Crystals." is utter genius.

Elvis Telecom, Wednesday, 30 June 2010 01:17 (fifteen years ago)

Flashy, making the scene, flaunting convention.

pass le corbusier (s1ocki), Wednesday, 30 June 2010 04:39 (fifteen years ago)

Well, let me tell you something, funny boy.

(but you know every line is gold - gold I tell yer).

Ned Trifle II, Wednesday, 30 June 2010 08:30 (fifteen years ago)

wtf greatest scene in sitcom history? how the fuck?

samuel :D (a hoy hoy), Wednesday, 30 June 2010 08:44 (fifteen years ago)

"you're a comedian, you make people laugh"

would vote for simply "bad year for libraries... bad year for america" if they had been combined. also love "making the scene"

hobbes, Wednesday, 30 June 2010 08:55 (fifteen years ago)

you and your good time buddies

anyway, i dig Herpes (stevie), Wednesday, 30 June 2010 09:23 (fifteen years ago)

it's ok sam, these people don't watch friends

,,,,,,eeeeleon (darraghmac), Wednesday, 30 June 2010 09:40 (fifteen years ago)

let alone night court

hobbes, Wednesday, 30 June 2010 10:14 (fifteen years ago)

dang forgot night court

,,,,,,eeeeleon (darraghmac), Wednesday, 30 June 2010 10:17 (fifteen years ago)

"Flashy, making the scene, flaunting convention."

I am utterly and abjectly pissed off with this little lot (Tom D.), Wednesday, 30 June 2010 10:40 (fifteen years ago)

what is the deal with convention anyway? am i right? what is that?

,,,,,,eeeeleon (darraghmac), Wednesday, 30 June 2010 10:48 (fifteen years ago)

would vote for simply "bad year for libraries... bad year for america" if they had been combined.

^^^

INSUFFICIENT FUN (bernard snowy), Wednesday, 30 June 2010 10:51 (fifteen years ago)

LOL @ coffee/ freeze dried crystals bit

I am utterly and abjectly pissed off with this little lot (Tom D.), Wednesday, 30 June 2010 10:53 (fifteen years ago)

so this was a J*ck W*bb parody, huh

kind of shrill and very self-righteous (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 30 June 2010 11:05 (fifteen years ago)

Automatic thread bump. This poll's results are now in.

System, Wednesday, 30 June 2010 23:01 (fifteen years ago)

I saw you on TV once. I remembered your name. From my list. I looked it up. Sure enough, it checked out.

*snigger*

I am utterly and abjectly pissed off with this little lot (Tom D.), Thursday, 1 July 2010 11:55 (fifteen years ago)

three years pass...

I remember when the librarian was a much older woman. Kindly, discreet, unattractive. We didn't know anything about her private life. We didn't want to know anything about her private life. She didn't have a private life. While you're thinking about that, think about this: The library closes at five o'clock, no exceptions. This is your final warning. Got that, kewpie-doll?

(The Other) J.D. (J.D.), Saturday, 10 August 2013 23:36 (twelve years ago)

four years pass...

Checking to see if there's been a PBH movie poll...You chopped up my favourite line, Mr. Snrub: "Bad year for libraries--bad year for America."

clemenza, Sunday, 1 July 2018 19:08 (seven years ago)

(A point made twice above.)

clemenza, Sunday, 1 July 2018 19:09 (seven years ago)


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