Oh snap! The zings of quiz bowl and Jeopardy champ Ken Jennings.

Deep in the heart of this well-mannered nerd lies a zing-monster who will strike without warning and mercy:

'What 2010 movie sequel used the tagline "Carrie On" on its movie posters? Sex and the City 2, because "Samantha On" sounded stupid. So did "The Appallingly Rancid and Out-of-Touch Film of the Summer!"'

so is "zing" now officially defined as "the laziest possible mean comment about the easiest target available"

it always was

well yeah, just wondering if OED had caught up to usage

Okay maybe I oversold it, but zing-monster sounded way more terrifying than Snarkles Snarktopolous.

Ken Jennings of the Church of Latter-Day Zings

'What iconic newspaperman is pictured on the Pulitzer Prize medal? Benjamin Franklin's profile is on one side; a strapping young semi-nude printer is on the other. Rrrawrr.'

zing-monster sounded way more terrifying than Snarkles Snarktopolous

no, no it does not

I like that his less terrifying sarcasm nickname is Greek.

'What do you call an ellipse whose eccentricity is zero? BORING! Also, a
circle.'

'What unusual distinction is shared by these American cities and, as far as I can tell, no others? Hollywood, Kansas City, L.A., Miami Beach, Tucson. There are, according to my research, the only U.S. cities mentioned in Beatles songs. (Respectively: "Honey Pie," "Kansas City," "Blue Jay Way," "Back in the U.S.S.R.," and "Get Back.") Did I miss any? Rain, South Carolina and Blackbird, Oregon don't count.'

Wow, I know something that Ken Jennings doesn't!

Hollywood is a neighborhood, not a city. At least not the Hollywood that the Beatles were singing about.

If he includes "Kansas City" he should include "Memphis, Tennessee" too.

also "Johnny B Goode" (New Orleans) and probably others

'What unusual distinction is shared by all these movies? The Born Losers, First Blood, In the Heat of the Night, Love Story, Pitch Black, A Shot in the Dark, The Silence of the Lambs, and True Grit. These are all movies that weren't named after their protagonist, but had sequels that were: respectively Billy Jack, Rambo, They Call Me Mr. Tibbs, Oliver's Story, The Chronicles of Riddick, Inspector Clouseau, Hannibal, and Rooster Cogburn. Yes, I'm considering the terrible Alan Arkin Inspector Clouseau movie a sequel. Who's going to remember it if I don't?'

there was an alan arkin inspector clouseau movie?

http://www.movies4wholesale.com/product_images/027616132840_a.jpg

'What product has recently advertised itself by coining new words like "Peanutopolis," "Satisfectellent," and "Hungerectomy"? Remember those ugly new words in the Snickers font in their ads? Would you want to eat something that was "Satisfectellent"? Ugh. It's feculent AND repellent!'

'What unusual distinction is shared by these music acts and no others? Jimmy Buffett, the Grateful Dead, B. B. King, Willie Nelson, Elvis Presley, Frank Sinatra, Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band, and now Pearl Jam? These are all the artists with their very own satellite radio station. Are there really Sirius or XM subscribers that want to hear 24 hours of Pearl Jam a day? Think how much weed you'd have to smoke to actually like the later albums.'

Ken Jennings not afraid to alienate Snickers-eating Pearl Jam fans!

'Who tweets under the Twitter handle @shebop_aka_cyn? Couldn't Cyndi "Shebop" Lauper get a real handle? Fire your publicist, Cyndi. Unlike the Goonies, he's just not good enough.'

three in a row from KJ:

'This time next year, Rep. Paul Ryan will be a guest on Jeopardy "Power Players" week. Answering "Who is John Galt?" to every clue.'

'James Carville looks like he recently escaped from a Tim Burton stop-motion movie'

'SHARIA LAW BITCHES!!!'

I love this guy

'What unusual distinction is shared by all these movies? Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever, Catwoman, Charlie's Angels, The Fall, Missing, Tim's Vermeer, Under the Cherry Moon, W.E. All these movies were credited to one-named directors: KAOS, Pitof, McG, Tarsem, Costa-Gavras, Teller, Prince, and Madonna. As you can tell, there's not a HUGE correlation between one-named director and movie quality.'

http://pbs.twimg.com/media/BljprhCCEAAYo8U.jpg

haha

'Weird how Alex Trebek always says "Hail Hydra" to the contestants during the closing credits.'

what the

Ken Jennings @KenJennings · 2h
Nothing sadder than a hot person in a wheelchair.

I just discovered this guy's Twitter. Good value.

Ken Jennings @KenJennings
"I put the pho back in upholstery!" --me spilling pho in your car that one time

from fellow Jeopardy traveller Arthur Chu:
"Wreck It Ralph:Pixels::Ratatouille:An actual restaurant infested with rats"

https://twitter.com/KenJennings/status/641431590095032321