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Attention, gourmands - which of the food polls should renowned kitchen maestro Louis J4gger turn into an 8-part dish?

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There's no way this can go wrong.

Poll Results

OptionVotes
Group H (Foie Gras, Houmous, Hamburgers, Pistachios, Chocolate, Pad Thai, Oysters, Cheesecake) 9
Group C (Sweet Pies, Falafel, Crisps, Bagels, Berries, Burritos, Crab, Poutine) 7
Group G (Confit De Canard, Sushi, Bananas, Tacos, Sausage, Shrimp, Waffles, Limes) 5
Group A (Pastries, Chicken Fried Steak, Bacon, Peanut Butter, Oatmeal, Hard Cheeses, Avocados, Chicken) 4
Group E (Eggs, Cookies, Tofu, Fondue, Peaches, BBQ Ribs, Crepes, French Fries) 4
Group F (Hot Dogs, Lentils, Tomatoes, Ice Cream, Spinach, Savoury Pies, Watermelon, Lamb) 4
Group B (Soft Cheeses, Pasta, Curry, Asparagus, Salad, Risotto, Olives, Pizza) 2
Group D (Cake, Soup, White Rice, Kebabs, Mushrooms, Fish, Steak, Potatoes) 1


― Anti-Suggest Ban Order (acoleuthic), Saturday, 24 July 2010 23:20 (fifteen years ago)

Group B is the only one that wouldn't be thoroughly disgusting.

― sarahel, Saturday, 24 July 2010 23:22 (fifteen years ago)

really want to be mean and pick group e or h

― I DONT WANT TO HEAR ABOUT YOUR SAVED CHALK (jjjusten), Saturday, 24 July 2010 23:22 (fifteen years ago)

If Crepes lose to motherfucken Fries, I'm not only doing this, I'm posting a pictorial account

― Anti-Suggest Ban Order (acoleuthic), Sunday, 25 July 2010 19:21 (fifteen years ago)

why did you respell hummus

― dill hai to mango aur (cozen), Sunday, 25 July 2010 19:30 (fifteen years ago)

because FUCK YOU I'M CYPRIOT

― Anti-Suggest Ban Order (acoleuthic), Sunday, 25 July 2010 19:31 (fifteen years ago)

:D

― Anti-Suggest Ban Order (acoleuthic), Sunday, 25 July 2010 19:32 (fifteen years ago)

voted Group E

― ninjas and lasers and gold and (snoball), Sunday, 25 July 2010 19:33 (fifteen years ago)

Man LJ this all-caps Cypriot gambit is wearing pretty thing.

― Warum habt Ihr mich totgefüttert? (Abbott), Sunday, 25 July 2010 19:34 (fifteen years ago)

It's soooooo aggro!

― Warum habt Ihr mich totgefüttert? (Abbott), Sunday, 25 July 2010 19:36 (fifteen years ago)

Abbott, c'mon, a dude can't even quote himself for levity these days...

― Anti-Suggest Ban Order (acoleuthic), Sunday, 25 July 2010 19:37 (fifteen years ago)

Houmous Centipede

― ninjas and lasers and gold and (snoball), Sunday, 25 July 2010 19:38 (fifteen years ago)

why have you fed me to death?

― still they got me like beezus (Pillbox), Sunday, 25 July 2010 19:38 (fifteen years ago)

assume Pastries can be savoury, and A is an easy winner.

― sometimes all it takes is a healthy dose of continental indiepop (tomofthenest), Sunday, 25 July 2010 21:45 (fifteen years ago)

Automatic thread bump. This poll is closing tomorrow.

― System, Monday, 26 July 2010 23:01 (fifteen years ago)

cmon this is important

― corn piece in mouffetard (acoleuthic), Tuesday, 27 July 2010 11:38 (fifteen years ago)

definitely E. All most likely disgusting, so why not go all out.

― Merdeyeux, Tuesday, 27 July 2010 11:48 (fifteen years ago)

Feel like H would be more disgusting. Pad Thai, Chocolate, Hamburers, and Foie Gras? Added insult because foie gras probably pretty expensive.

― kkvgz, Tuesday, 27 July 2010 11:51 (fifteen years ago)

I would have voted H, but I suspect that the Jagster has already perpetrated something like that.

― ninjas and lasers and gold and (snoball), Tuesday, 27 July 2010 11:52 (fifteen years ago)

E would be a bit boring IMO, H is more like the full-blown nightmare I'm after - there isn't a group here that wouldn't be interesting in some way though

― corn piece in mouffetard (acoleuthic), Tuesday, 27 July 2010 11:54 (fifteen years ago)

Group D could genuinely be made into a proper dish, for instance

― corn piece in mouffetard (acoleuthic), Tuesday, 27 July 2010 11:55 (fifteen years ago)

a good meat & mushroom broth with cake to garnish

― corn piece in mouffetard (acoleuthic), Tuesday, 27 July 2010 11:56 (fifteen years ago)

the full-blown nightmare I'm after

N.B. I'm not necessarily after this - there are different factors at play - perhaps I will want to essay edibility, perhaps I want to troll the stomach - you decide

― corn piece in mouffetard (acoleuthic), Tuesday, 27 July 2010 11:59 (fifteen years ago)

I'll bet that respondants in this poll are more likely to want to troll you, LJ.

― kkvgz, Tuesday, 27 July 2010 12:05 (fifteen years ago)

Group D -> Chinese hotpot, rice on the side, cake for desert, perfect!
The rest, esp F, G, H -> something out of a hacky standup routine about pregnant women

― I can use my expense account if I say they're whores (CONGO, M.D.), Tuesday, 27 July 2010 13:49 (fifteen years ago)

do british people really spell it houmous?

― iatee, Tuesday, 27 July 2010 13:51 (fifteen years ago)

Oum Kalthoum, Om Kolthom, Om Kalsoum, Omm Kalsoum, Omme Kolsoum, Oom Koolsum, Oum Kalthoum, Oum Kalthum, Oum Kalsoum, Oum Kaltsoum, Oum Kolthoum, Oum Koulsoum, Oum Kulthum, Oum Kulthume, Um Kalthoum,

― corn piece in mouffetard (acoleuthic), Tuesday, 27 July 2010 13:54 (fifteen years ago)

Are you trying to say, Louis, that sometimes there isn't one standard acceptable way to translate Arabic words into English?

― kkvgz, Tuesday, 27 July 2010 13:56 (fifteen years ago)

Wikipedia offers 'homos' as a possible transliteration. I plan to adopt it. But yeah, 'houmous' is a British/Greek way of doing it.

― corn piece in mouffetard (acoleuthic), Tuesday, 27 July 2010 13:58 (fifteen years ago)

You do get hommous, too.

― stoic newington (suzy), Tuesday, 27 July 2010 14:09 (fifteen years ago)

tempted to vote C because how the fuck is LJ going to get his hands on poutine

― "There's no way a Filipino can hold a championship trophy." (HI DERE), Tuesday, 27 July 2010 14:19 (fifteen years ago)

could, like, MAKE some poutine using the depraved recesses of my imagination

― corn piece in mouffetard (acoleuthic), Tuesday, 27 July 2010 14:28 (fifteen years ago)

dan poutine is just a type of food

― iatee, Tuesday, 27 July 2010 14:29 (fifteen years ago)

lol

― "There's no way a Filipino can hold a championship trophy." (HI DERE), Tuesday, 27 July 2010 14:30 (fifteen years ago)

Voted H.

One dish! One big 8-part dish, not an 8 course meal. Can't wait to see the chocolate-dipped oysters.

― My totem animal is a hamburger. (WmC), Tuesday, 27 July 2010 14:34 (fifteen years ago)

Voted B - because of LJ's iconic pizza thread

― sarahel, Tuesday, 27 July 2010 18:49 (fifteen years ago)

the thing is, LJ is going to make B as a pizza anyway so we should get him to branch out

― "There's no way a Filipino can hold a championship trophy." (HI DERE), Tuesday, 27 July 2010 19:11 (fifteen years ago)

i want to make this clear - as a voter in this contest, i demand that this is a single dish entree you are making, becuase if its a coursed meal then it is useless.

also, i am going to go ahead and predict a landslide victory for a particular choice. enjoy your oyster cheesecake dude.

― Poutine kissed boy "like a kitten" (jjjusten), Tuesday, 27 July 2010 19:16 (fifteen years ago)

People seem to be underestimating the perverseness of C.

(I am also assuming that it has to be a single course, if not a single mushed up dish - creating a meal of several courses just does not count here.)

― emil.y, Tuesday, 27 July 2010 19:17 (fifteen years ago)

i'm pretty clear that LJ intended it as a single dish entree - as the thread title implies.

― sarahel, Tuesday, 27 July 2010 19:17 (fifteen years ago)

sweet falafel pie sounds kind of tasty tbh, at least until you put the poutine on top

― "There's no way a Filipino can hold a championship trophy." (HI DERE), Tuesday, 27 July 2010 19:18 (fifteen years ago)

Also, LJ being a proper Britisher, the crisps would have to be Walker's. Monster Munch or Space Raiders would also be acceptable.

― emil.y, Tuesday, 27 July 2010 19:18 (fifteen years ago)

None of those kettle chips, thank you very much.

― emil.y, Tuesday, 27 July 2010 19:19 (fifteen years ago)

kettle chips are awesome!

― sarahel, Tuesday, 27 July 2010 19:21 (fifteen years ago)

Yeah, but they're not proper crisps, is what I'm saying.

― emil.y, Tuesday, 27 July 2010 19:24 (fifteen years ago)

I think half these groups are already available as british pizzas

― I DIED, Tuesday, 27 July 2010 19:25 (fifteen years ago)

I think I saw E on the Pizza Express menu

― "There's no way a Filipino can hold a championship trophy." (HI DERE), Tuesday, 27 July 2010 19:30 (fifteen years ago)

E could make a good picnic/BBQ day in the park, and french people and vegetarians could come too

― iatee, Tuesday, 27 July 2010 19:33 (fifteen years ago)

nvm french people and vegetarians would spoil any fun day in the park

― iatee, Tuesday, 27 July 2010 19:33 (fifteen years ago)

Dan, have you ever been to California? Your comments about British pizza could easily apply to California.

― sarahel, Tuesday, 27 July 2010 19:33 (fifteen years ago)

I've been to California

Worse, I've been to California Pizza Kitchen

― "There's no way a Filipino can hold a championship trophy." (HI DERE), Tuesday, 27 July 2010 19:34 (fifteen years ago)

just sayin' - you can't assert American superiority on the subject of "things that shouldn't go on a pizza" over the Brits.

― sarahel, Tuesday, 27 July 2010 19:36 (fifteen years ago)

I dunno not all california style pizza is bad

― iatee, Tuesday, 27 July 2010 19:36 (fifteen years ago)

basically, the British aren't nearly as imaginative as Californians in terms of putting things on a pizza "that shouldn't go on a pizza"

― sarahel, Tuesday, 27 July 2010 19:37 (fifteen years ago)

voted C

poutine itself is a silhouette of the darkest recesses of lovecraft's psyche but mixed with a sweet pie, some falafel, crisps, bagels, berries, burritos, AND crab

lol

― cozen, Tuesday, 27 July 2010 19:38 (fifteen years ago)

xp iatee - i like fish on pizza; i'm just taking issue with Dan's cheap attempts at cultural bullying

― sarahel, Tuesday, 27 July 2010 19:39 (fifteen years ago)

it'll be worse than the full portion of burger and fries baked into a calzone from sweden
http://blog.jensnyberg.com/stuff/skromal.jpg

― cozen, Tuesday, 27 July 2010 19:39 (fifteen years ago)

the only thing that looks horrible about that is the lettuce

― sarahel, Tuesday, 27 July 2010 19:40 (fifteen years ago)

that sorta looks like someone cut open an animal

― iatee, Tuesday, 27 July 2010 19:44 (fifteen years ago)

decided to go with C because no matter what happens w/ the other stuff,

british attempt at bagel + british attempt burrito = probably gonna be the most disgusting moment in food history

― iatee, Tuesday, 27 July 2010 19:48 (fifteen years ago)

xp iatee - i like fish on pizza; i'm just taking issue with Dan's cheap attempts at cultural bullying

... which YOU started...?

seriously, wtf is wrong with you

― "There's no way a Filipino can hold a championship trophy." (HI DERE), Tuesday, 27 July 2010 19:57 (fifteen years ago)

i dunno Dan, you went to Harvard, you tell me!

― sarahel, Tuesday, 27 July 2010 20:04 (fifteen years ago)

You went to Brown, you know just as well as I do.

― measuring of the waist (HI DERE), Tuesday, 27 July 2010 20:06 (fifteen years ago)

A sort of... almost coheres? The peanut butter does a lot of work.

― Gravel Puzzleworth, Tuesday, 27 July 2010 20:07 (fifteen years ago)

this is a joke thread - i was joking around - LJ + pizza = instant comedy, right?

― sarahel, Tuesday, 27 July 2010 20:07 (fifteen years ago)

G I think could be edible if done right.

― Gravel Puzzleworth, Tuesday, 27 July 2010 20:07 (fifteen years ago)

how did a lj food thread turn into an ivy-off so fast

― iatee, Tuesday, 27 July 2010 20:08 (fifteen years ago)

decided to go with C because no matter what happens w/ the other stuff,

british attempt at bagel + british attempt burrito = probably gonna be the most disgusting moment in food history

see also brit attempt at poutine

it's gonna be even worse than DISCO FRIES

― Cold Poutine, So Hard To Eat (Will M.), Tuesday, 27 July 2010 20:08 (fifteen years ago)

also how is he gonna make berries in the uk

― Cold Poutine, So Hard To Eat (Will M.), Tuesday, 27 July 2010 20:08 (fifteen years ago)

lol, "ivy-off"

― Take my hand, we'll make it I swear (Pashmina), Tuesday, 27 July 2010 20:08 (fifteen years ago)

xxxxxp just add water?

― ninjas and lasers and gold and (snoball), Tuesday, 27 July 2010 20:08 (fifteen years ago)

("instant comedy")

― ninjas and lasers and gold and (snoball), Tuesday, 27 July 2010 20:09 (fifteen years ago)

never mind...

― ninjas and lasers and gold and (snoball), Tuesday, 27 July 2010 20:09 (fifteen years ago)

when he realizes how many of the items in C are impossible for him he's just gonna falafel

― Cold Poutine, So Hard To Eat (Will M.), Tuesday, 27 July 2010 20:09 (fifteen years ago)

how did a lj food thread turn into an ivy-off so fast

again, you should ask sarahel; it seems to be one of her "things"

― measuring of the waist (HI DERE), Tuesday, 27 July 2010 20:12 (fifteen years ago)

i think this is really all about differences in taste when it comes to the staleness of jokes

― sarahel, Tuesday, 27 July 2010 20:13 (fifteen years ago)

classic harvard/brown cultural misunderstanding imo

― iatee, Tuesday, 27 July 2010 20:14 (fifteen years ago)

Whatever wins, I'm adding popcorn.

― My totem animal is a hamburger. (WmC), Tuesday, 27 July 2010 20:14 (fifteen years ago)

wtf with popcorn not being in the food poll???

― sarahel, Tuesday, 27 July 2010 20:15 (fifteen years ago)

how many of the items in C are impossible

Pretty sure all of this stuff is available in Harrod's Food Court, except the Poutine and that's just chips with cheese on top, right?

― ninjas and lasers and gold and (snoball), Tuesday, 27 July 2010 20:16 (fifteen years ago)

I'm gonna say it's because it's the gnarliest junk on earth is why xpost

― Cold Poutine, So Hard To Eat (Will M.), Tuesday, 27 July 2010 20:16 (fifteen years ago)

poutine is just nachos? weird

― iatee, Tuesday, 27 July 2010 20:16 (fifteen years ago)

you people

― Cold Poutine, So Hard To Eat (Will M.), Tuesday, 27 July 2010 20:17 (fifteen years ago)

i've mentally created the group F dish and i almost kinda want to try eating it

― It's like normal life except you power up by peeing (ciderpress), Tuesday, 27 July 2010 20:17 (fifteen years ago)

poutine doesn't have cheese, it has cheese curds. and gravy.

― It's like normal life except you power up by peeing (ciderpress), Tuesday, 27 July 2010 20:17 (fifteen years ago)

i think louis could be really enlightening on the subject of nachos ...

― sarahel, Tuesday, 27 July 2010 20:18 (fifteen years ago)

yeah yeah yeah, talk to the frying pan 'cause the chef ain't listening. (xpost to sarahel)

― My totem animal is a hamburger. (WmC), Tuesday, 27 July 2010 20:18 (fifteen years ago)

http://i.ehow.com/images/a05/3a/g8/make-homemade-poutine-200X200.jpg

check out these nachos

― Cold Poutine, So Hard To Eat (Will M.), Tuesday, 27 July 2010 20:19 (fifteen years ago)

Automatic thread bump. This poll's results are now in.

― System, Tuesday, 27 July 2010 23:01 (fifteen years ago)

oh shit

― corn piece in mouffetard (acoleuthic), Tuesday, 27 July 2010 23:01 (fifteen years ago)

"There's no way this can go wrong."

― Take my hand, we'll make it I swear (Pashmina), Tuesday, 27 July 2010 23:31 (fifteen years ago)

YES YES YES YES YES YES YES

― Poutine kissed boy "like a kitten" (jjjusten), Tuesday, 27 July 2010 23:31 (fifteen years ago)


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