Favorite Plotline in the film [i]Love Actually[/i]

firth

firth or linney. everything >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Kris Marshall + American women

worst is the one with the stalker guy flashing signs at a chick saying I HAVE ALWAYS *flips card* LOVED YOU *flips card* JUST FYI

Probably have to go with the Hugh Grant one, but there is certainly an embarrassment of riches here

worst is the one with the stalker guy flashing signs at a chick saying I HAVE ALWAYS *flips card* LOVED YOU *flips card* JUST FYI

― Princess TamTam, Monday, December 20, 2010 12:44 PM (12 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

yeah this one is terrible, weird racial politics, generally gross behavior, would have cut it from the movie

best is either hugh grant or colin firth--both those chicks are p cute and the portugal bit at the end is a+

laura linney one is too sad

yeah, Laura Linney one is heartbreaking and so, in a totally different way, is the Rickman/Thompson one.

i honestly dont remember any of the other stories besides mr. sign flipper and hugh grant - i remember saying to my gf at the time how creepy i found it and she was like 'nooo its so romantic!' and i could only think if i ever tried that on anyone i'd get arrested - thats the only thing i took away from this wretched movie

Def. not Liam Neeson and the freaky looking kid.

i honestly dont remember any of the stories

fixed

mr sign flipper = main dude from the Walking Dead, btw. I thought it was a completely inappropriate way to behave towards your best mate's missus. I preferred the sad stories, but the Colin Firth one is mad cute as well.

a fabulous place called wisconsin.

Alternate ending for that scene was Mr Sign Flipper dropping the sign and then blowing Keira's head off with a shotgun.

mr sign flipper = main dude from the Walking Dead, btw.

hah - i saw a trailer the other day for some movie where he plays a posh british professor or something and i was like 'Rick???'

First episode of Walking Dead I was like, "Hey it's the sign guy!" who, by the way, I think you're all being too harsh on. The part where he took the video of only her well, OK, that was pretty creepy but the thing with the signs was sweet if incredibly cheesy. As far as being inappropriate towards his best friend's girl - the only reason he did the flippy sign thing was because she found him out by accident. I don't think he was ever going to tell her otherwise and he had to do something because iirc it was totally awkward after she found the video and needed to be addressed somehow.

oh man, this is the worst thing I have ever seen - not just the worst film, the worst thing

I love the Emma Thompson/Rickman story because it's just kind of heartbreaking and uncomfortable

Love the Firth/Portugese babe because it's like it's own movie

I'm a little partial to sign flipper storyline bc Knightley says that line about the wedding video being "all wibbly" and I really love that sign flipper guy from when he was Egg in "This Life"...and I liked the cheesy "All You Need Is Love" bit in the wedding, it was cute as hell.

And Hugh Grant/cute girl story is really freaking adorable. Especially when he visits her house.

I cant' decide. But one thing I will say: I hate hate hate hate HATE the naked people storyline. UGH. Hate it so much. I always fast forward through those parts.

lol

I'm angry at myself for devoting as much thought and time to type of my defense of sign guy tbh.

oh sorry - that was x-post

I LOVED this movie the first time I saw it but watched it again last year and wondered what the hell I was thinking tbh.

I think the end of the movie indicates that the sign thing, though creepy, was actually cathartic for him and so allowed him to be a normal human being and be friends with Keira's character.

agreed

I mean, however you slice it, it is kind of a weird story but it's not the worst. Because naked people is absolutely the worst fuiud

Milwaukee hilarity is pretty awful.

Yeah I agree too re the catharsis and whatever. The actual sign scene was the least creepy part of his behavior.

Wait what are the "naked people"? The guy from the office who plays the porn star?

yeah that's the one. they're movie stand-ins fake-shagging for some movie and they're making small talk the wholetiem

guy from the office and her off Gavin & Stacey, isn't it?

http://i53.tinypic.com/2mgoxnl.jpg

This is why the zombie apocalypse happened.

Don't remind me

the keira/egg/only_black_character triangle was the worst thing

lol OK maybe that part is worse than I rememebered

guy from the office and her off Gavin & Stacey, isn't it?

― ailsa, Monday, December 20, 2010 1:34 PM (12 minutes ago) Bookmark

yep

I truly love the Milwaukee scene, it is hilarious

weird watching that now and seeing... betty draper

What? Where?

shes one of the american chicks

nighy because it is the least irritating part of this wretched film

the firth storyline is so deeply hilarious to me. was he really writing some kind of mystery novel out in longhand on a desk (!) perched at the end of a dock (!!) or am i just misremembering?

best is the one where the dude goes to america and bangs january jones and other hot ass chicks

the laura linney one is drawing a total blank here

she can't get it on with bloke because she's looking after her ill brother.

ill people are the worst

shes in love with this male model who apparently gets paid to hang around some darkened office gets his clothes off (thankfully) but gets cockblocked by here mentally ill brothers constant phone calls

The male model was the guy from lost who everyone hated and also the weird drag king Persian King in 3000!

iirc Firth was writing his mystery novel on a typewriter near a dock, like on the patio or something

Ha, so he was, I had forgotten about that.

xpost

David and Natalie (Hugh Grant as PM)

is Natalie the round-faced brunette? if so, that, bcz she was cute

still shits me that people jizz all over Nighy in this when it was Curtis' pale rip-off of Nighy in Clement & LaFrenais' Still Crazy

Egg is the lead in the Walking Dead adaptation??!!??!? does he do an American accent?

yeah, Egg does an American accent. Nice Southern accent...not too shabby imo

yep

yeah its not bad actually

worst is the one with the stalker guy flashing signs at a chick saying I HAVE ALWAYS *flips card* LOVED YOU *flips card* JUST FYI

― Princess TamTam, Monday, December 20, 2010 12:44 PM (12 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

yeah this one is terrible, weird racial politics, generally gross behavior, would have cut it from the movie

best is either hugh grant or colin firth--both those chicks are p cute and the portugal bit at the end is a+

― max, Monday, December 20, 2010 12:57 PM (5 hours ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

serious question: what are the weird racial politics of that plot? all i remember is that one of the guys was black and it didn't seem to be remarked upon or made an important plot point in any way.

i dont remember either

Not in the general holiday spirit, no.

this movie was an airlines ad

rewatched this in full for the first time since it came out (had only seen parts of it) and like everyone else couldn't believe how bad a few of these story lines are. Also, and somehow I'd missed this, but Walking Dead guy lovebombs (an apparently 18 year old) Keira Knightly and yet, when the movie ends, there she is with her husband and him? There's really no resolution to that at all.

Best story is Emma Thompson and Alan Rickman. I am a Hugh Grant fan and so I like his british-public-wish-fulfilment storyline. It does show you how far we've advanced in 20 years where no one in their right mind will look at Eastenders woman now and think of her as chubby.

oh right and bill nighy....dumb storyline but also the most genuinely touching one.

Plumpy xp

I am a Hugh Grant fan and so I like his british-public-wish-fulfilment storyline.

Yeah, see, at the time it was def a fun "stick it to Bush and Blair" moment but now I listen to his little speech about being a small island that brought the world Shakespeare and all I hear is "UKIP UKIP UKIP".

I'd say that "The boat that rocked" was worse as it had a decent movie about Pirate Radio and smothered it in uck. The deleted scenes were mostly really good (the bit where they go down to Abbey Road studios at night and stare in wonder was genuinely touching, but had no context to fit it into the movie)...

Anyway, the only reason it isn't is that it's reach is only the sixties, not the entirety of "Love".

Still, both films are like Eric Idle going "Worr, ay?"

I had to watch this again this Christmas.

My family unironically love it.

I have to stare at this object over and over again.

Neeson plot is nearly interesting - it's sort of written as the stepfather/stepson pair attempting to manage grief by participating in romantic fictions (the tell being the crush-object having the same name as the dead mother), but it gives into the fiction and becomes slop. Also where is the boy's father? Are we inferring another death in his life?

I feel offended by the film's hatred of sex - the 2 most marginal plots (Freeman naked, Marshall's sex slaves) seem to treat it as a joke that is orthogonal to love. And of course the Rickman/Thompson/Makatsch plot treats it as destructive - Makatsch left only with a necklace (but seemingly not unhappy in her final scene), materially improved but excluded from the emotional economy of the film.

Grant, yes, that speech is 100% the Brexit sensibility and the whole slightly bumbling public schoolboy attitude flatters the part of the English nation psyche that chooses Johnson.

Lincoln/KK/Chiwetel gtfo, everyone otm.

I hate this film and want to be cynical about everything but Linney is brilliant and makes her plot work. Even her little scenes with Rickman move lightly.

i recently watched this again for the first time since it first came out. it is an insane/bad movie, but there are some good performances in it. neeson, thompson, rickman, linney, even andrew lincoln are all great, and i'm a sucker for grant's shtick so he works for me too (though i could not watch him dance). the actress who plays the portuguese maid is also good, though her more low-key/naturalistic performance doesn't fit in with what everyone else is doing.

it is crazy to me that the body double plot got the second-most votes in this poll, but otoh i can't really think of which plot i would pick. they are all pretty objectionable in different ways. i guess i would pick the linney plotline though i have no memory of how/if it resolves - it's the most unique plotline, feels the most grounded in reality, and no one acts like a douche in it.

I think I was reading a Julie Burchill(!) review of 4 Weddings when I decided it sounded fucking awful + I was never going to watch this shit, or any of his fucking movies for that matter. iirc Burchill wrote something about how the posh swearing in 4 weddings is hilarious. Blackadder 2 is as far as I got with this screenwriter and it doesn't look like I'm missing anything. But it has been fun reading how uniquely bad this one is. I almost feel like watching it now.

four weddings is

ok

i mean it has charms in the moments imo

And I'd forgotten the 9/11 line till I watched it this time - it is wild! Partly because it feels like such a work of the soft 90s.
My response was 'wow it would be cool to phone your enemy at the point of death and tell them you will carry your hatred into the next life'

the bb-tagging in this thread title is like an itch that's gone unscratched for a millenia

Lincoln/KK/Chiwetel gtfo, everyone otm.

Was kind of in a pain void by the final airport scene but felt there was a vague chance they were a throuple and pretending they weren't, which is an almost ok end to the plotline (only if Lincoln/Chiwetel also fucking)

it is crazy to me that the body double plot got the second-most votes in this poll,

honestly i would probably vote for the body double plotline, since it struck me as maybe the most healthy and normal plot. like, aside from working on a porn(?) film, they are just two normal-seeming people who meet, hit it off, go on a date, and thats all there is to it, without any deception, inscrutable choices or frightening sociopathic behavior.

i'm sure this has been done to death, but one of the weirdest things for me was how 4 of the 9 plotlines are about rich men pursuing employees. one plotline would be like "lol how tone deaf, it sure was a different time", but almost half the stories are about this! but bizarrely, the movie does not seem to feel like it is "about" this in any way, its just depicted as a very normal and common way for men & women to find romance. the only one thats not consummated by the end is alan rickman, and thats just because he's married, not because of any taboo about sleeping with employees. its stuff like that which makes this cross the line from just "bad romantic comedy" to "i cant believe what i'm watching".

aside from working on a porn(?) film

the sets are awfully nice for a porn film so I think it's a non-porn with lots of sex scenes....also, how long were they working on that film? The whole thing takes place over the course of several weeks. Timewise it makes zero sense.

Blackadder 2 is as far as I got with this screenwriter and it doesn't look like I'm missing anything.

Notting Hill was good but yes, otherwise you aren't missing anything, Blackadder is his supreme achievement.

the Linney story is good but why does that guy just lose interest in her because she has a mentally ill brother? what a putz

istr that its explicitly a porn set tho

4 of the 9 plotlines are about rich men pursuing employees

Colin Firth / Hugh Grant / Alan Rickman / who am I missing? Is Laura Linney working for or with her crush? It's been a while since I saw it.

I think we're supposed to think Linney's crush is a putz, that he froze her out because she had to take the call when they were about to have sex. Either because of injury to his sexual magnetism, or because he realised that he'd be sharing her affections - either way, not great.

Notting Hill is not good (says a former bookseller in Notting Hill Gate)

to me it seemed more like it just kind of killed the vibe (she was like crying and stuff) so he bounced. he could have been more supportive but they don't actually seem to know each other that well. it's putzy but not douchey imo.

the body double plotline isn't bad but it's very slight, it's one kind-of-joke stretched out over 10 minutes. also it doesn't seem like a porn movie, would a porn studio hire extra people to stand in for lighting tests?

xxp i was technically including Bill Nighy and his manager - which is obviously played for a laugh, but at the same time, i cant ignore the fact that it does in fact end with bill nighy arriving at his employees house, calling him the love of his life, and watching porn. (also crazy sexual tension in that last scene, i was sure they were gonna kiss)

re:the body double movie, its very confusing because the sex scenes seem to be bordering on x-rated and take place in many different rooms across many weeks of filming, but with what appears to be a major budget and large professional crew.

a decent porn movie?

that's the worst kind of porn movie

Wikipedia sez: "John and Judy are professional stand-ins for films. They meet doing the sex scenes for a film for which Tony is a production assistant."

The way that all of the stories are interconnected is the worst mid-level worst, just make a compilation film u coward.

blame martin mcdonagh for that

"When the planes hit the Twin Towers, as far as I know, none of the phone calls from the people on board were messages of hate or revenge – they were all messages of love. If you look for it, I’ve got a sneaky feeling love, actually … is all around.”

These are ten stories of people set about nine months before they all found themselves as passengers on those fateful planes. You might as well say that that it was their... Last Christmas.

(Too dark?)

This is terrible, this script.

Just meaning to say that I also find this 9/11 bit quite inappropriate and stupid. Obviously people would rather call their loved ones than the people they hate when they know they're about to die.
I haven't seen this movie apart from the first ten minutes in German overdub, multiple times every Christmas I spent with my in-laws in Germany, as it's always on TV then. Never felt tempted to watch on.

I mean the quoted dialogue is terrible.

"can we imagine that many of the passengers on that fateful flight might have regretted, in the end, not driving home for christmas?"

look i know it was in november but

I've been thinking about this and any way you slice it, being in a plane about to hit the twin towers and deciding to call your arch enemy to really let them have it is a baller move.

"You won't have Nixon to kick around anymore!"

lol

The Freeman plot is def not porn - they’re stand-ins for lighting/cinematography on what we have to assume is let’s say a post-basic instinct mid/high budget 90s erotic drama.
And yes the linking is so half arsed for that, also the KK/Lincoln/Chiwetel plot (airport friends of Firth and Lincoln runs the gallery where the Rickman office party happens). I think… only the middle-class middle-aged plots (Grant/McCutcheon; Rickman/Thompson/Makatsch; Neeson/boy) are effortfully bound.
Saying more nice things about this monstrosity I have repeatedly faced: McCutcheon really works and yes! Lúcia Moniz is properly charming.
Oh I’d never noticed till this watch that the Firth/Moniz plot is not set in Portugal - it’s Marseilles/South of France. Like there’s some particular freedom of movement/migrant labour thing going on that I can’t unpick.

https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2023/oct/16/richard-curtis-admits-regret-over-weight-jokes-and-lack-of-diversity-in-films

he recently apologised, while getting interviewed by his daughter, for doing fat jokes, body shaming women and not having black characters in a Notting Hill movie at Cheltenham literary festival. But all the dodgy shit, that's fine!

*other*

You know I am full Stockholm-syn on this dark monument that I will be forced to watch and interpret and decode and rewatch and reinterpret and recode and rebuild for the rest of my life but About Time is a straight piece of shit.

I think I was blinded by love for Colin Firth when I decided his creepy pursuit of a woman he'd never spoken to was cute.

Give Moniz agency! She’s in too!

the linking woof mentions i can forgive- richard curtis and all like him know only those fifty people from college or work upon whom they rely for getting gigs like richard curtis has

Yup yup I get where his attention goes based on background - successful politician, director of ad agency, man with a very particular set of skills - but I felt myself noticing that Freeman and Marshall were basically badly attached sketches this time out.

Oh, the Tall Guy is actually not a bad film by Curtis. It predates all this dreck by several years and features Jeff Goldblum doing a stage musical of the Elephant Man called "Elephant!" (I haven't seen this in over 30 years so it might be terrible actually)

So as I try to summarise it in my head L,A is basically the real people have interesting dramas and aren’t the other smaller people funny and charming. Art (Bill Nighy) exists in a disturbing liminal space which is neither one nor the other but provides a background texture that eventually collapses into a queer/porn space which the film turns away from.

I think Linney complicates that - she's not an important successful man, but the film cares about what happens to her.

Oh, the Tall Guy is actually not a bad film by Curtis. It predates all this dreck by several years and features Jeff Goldblum doing a stage musical of the Elephant Man called "Elephant!" (I haven't seen this in over 30 years so it might be terrible actually)

about time is maybe the creepiest film ever made. change my mind

look i know it was in november but

― close encounters of the third knid (darraghmac), Wednesday, December 27, 2023 2:10 PM (five hours ago) bookmarkflaglink

this was fantastic

Oh I’d never noticed till this watch that the Firth/Moniz plot is not set in Portugal - it’s Marseilles/South of France. Like there’s some particular freedom of movement/migrant labour thing going on that I can’t unpick.

France, along with Switzerland, has traditionally been the main target of immigration for ppl from the Portuguese mainland - especially during the dictatorship, when it offered working class people a better chance at escaping poverty and political dissenters a safe space. If it had been set in Portugal the idea of Moniz speaking zero English would've been too ludicrous for words - a second gen immigrant living in France I can accept, though she would speak fluent French and her Portuguese would probably be a lot less good than it is in the film.

Portuguese men also 100% do not kiss each other ever, I had to unlearn this toxic masculinity kissing my French relatives on the cheeks.