Stupid cliches that surely no-one believes

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Follow up to the Lantana thread. In said film Kerry Anderson's character says to her therapist: "Its not the fact that he's having an affair that hurts - but the fact he wouldn't tell me."

This is a bit of a cliche, and salso surely untrue. After all isn't the point of an affair keeping it secret, and isn't the hurtful thing about an affair the fact that it is taking place in the first place?

So other crap cliches please - especially if the film then tries to bear them out.

― Pete (Pete), Thursday, 22 August 2002 13:32 (twenty-three years ago)

I suppose there's the one about how Imperial Stormtroopers are 'so precise' in their shots but in fact have consistently miserable aims.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 22 August 2002 14:23 (twenty-three years ago)

And the one about how any two people will more than likely fall in love if thrown together with sufficient cinematic force, despite not having anything in common and often actively disliking each other.

― Archel (Archel), Thursday, 22 August 2002 14:30 (twenty-three years ago)

Raggett is correct about this irritation except that no-one in the films ever says the stormtroopers are precise - it's just implied by their military status.

― the pinefox, Thursday, 22 August 2002 14:42 (twenty-three years ago)

If the phone rings on screen, you wait a while before answering it.

Having answered it you wait a while before saying 'Hello?'

And when you put the telephone down, you stare at it for a while.

― the pinefox, Thursday, 22 August 2002 14:44 (twenty-three years ago)

Most police officers actually survive their last day on the job.

― Colin Meeder (Mert), Thursday, 22 August 2002 14:44 (twenty-three years ago)

no-one in the films ever says the stormtroopers are precise

Obi Wan to Luke, coming across the destroyed Jawa sandcrawler: "Only Imperial stormtroopers are so precise."

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 22 August 2002 14:51 (twenty-three years ago)

How amusing, nuILX incorporated my < GEEK > tags I placed around that. ;-)

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 22 August 2002 14:52 (twenty-three years ago)

< GEEK > and < /GEEK > are actually valid HTML tags. The enclosed text will not appear to those who won't understand/care.

― Archel (Archel), Thursday, 22 August 2002 15:12 (twenty-three years ago)

OH NO!!!

― Chupa-Cabras (vicc13), Thursday, 22 August 2002 15:17 (twenty-three years ago)

Yowsa!

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 22 August 2002 15:34 (twenty-three years ago)

Pinefox that is ONE SCHOOL of phone cliche - where the phone is lingered over reluctantly - in many movies "important" people hang up the phone with no sign-off or goodbye, even between good friends. I guess this implies that these people are so pragmatic and "driven" they have no use for the niceties that us manners-enfeebled normals are encumbered with.

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Thursday, 22 August 2002 16:18 (twenty-three years ago)

There were a bunch of good ones on the moviecliches link someone posted a few weeks ago. I like the one where two people are having a conversation, one notices something weird outside and stares blankly, then finally the other person turns around when they realize their conversation partner isn't keeping up their end.

― Vinnie (vprabhu), Thursday, 22 August 2002 17:44 (twenty-three years ago)

that, as in "blade runner" or "five easy pieces" for example, women respond to being pushed around and coerced by givin' it up.

all jazz musicians have a smack problem.

gay men are all gifted with sartorial flair.

― mike (ro)bott, Thursday, 22 August 2002 18:04 (twenty-three years ago)

Pete: people really do feel like that.

― Sterling Clover (s_clover), Thursday, 22 August 2002 18:59 (twenty-three years ago)

Why do evil genius villians, having spent the entire movie coming up with delicious bon mots, suddenly start feeding the protaganist straight lines when caught for the final time?

evil madman in jail: Hey, it's cramped in here.

protaganist: Let me give you some elbow room!! (procedes to work villian over with his pointy joint)

― lawrence kansas, Thursday, 22 August 2002 19:08 (twenty-three years ago)

"Let me know if there's any change in his condition."
(Hangs up.)
"He's dead."

― bnw (bnw), Thursday, 22 August 2002 19:23 (twenty-three years ago)

When someone has obviously spent half an hour explaining something in detail, the other person has to say "So let me get this straight..." before regurgitating the whole thing for the benefit of the audience.

― Justyn Dillingham (Justyn Dillingham), Thursday, 22 August 2002 19:44 (twenty-three years ago)

Phone rings at night: person slowly comes round, rubs eyes, blearly answers phone.

Real life: phone rings at night, is answered straight away, person things someone has died or something terrible has happened.

― Clive, Thursday, 22 August 2002 19:53 (twenty-three years ago)

robott is way otm re blade runner - what ghastly stuff.

hand is otm too.

― the pinefox, Thursday, 22 August 2002 20:43 (twenty-three years ago)

but mike's thing happens too. people are fucked up that way.

― Sterling Clover (s_clover), Thursday, 22 August 2002 20:50 (twenty-three years ago)

All hookers have hearts of gold

― Miss Laura, Friday, 23 August 2002 06:40 (twenty-three years ago)

tisn't a cinematic cliche, but it's one that I'm getting painfully used to at the moment:

"unfortunately your application was not successful due to high standard of applications received. However, we will keep your CV on file"

yes, filed with the used tea bags and banana peels *sob*

― nickie (nickie), Friday, 23 August 2002 09:23 (twenty-three years ago)

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