my cable box can only get adult pay per view

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i called last night to order something on pay per view.

me: 'hi, i'd like to order xxx xxx'

rep: 'what's your address?'

me: 'xxx xxx avenue'

rep: 'oh i'm sorry - you can't order this program. your box is only compatible with ordering adult movies.'

me: 'can i get a different box?'

rep: 'well the only other type of box you can get is digital, and unfortunately that isn't in your area yet'

me: 'so i can't order anything unless it's got bad lesbian scenes?'

rep: 'sorry'

― maura (maura), Friday, 23 August 2002 11:54 (twenty-three years ago)

i mean i just don't understand, really ...

― maura (maura), Friday, 23 August 2002 11:54 (twenty-three years ago)

I know that in certain cities in the US, analog cable is being slowly filtered out. Since the cable companies can't FORCE anyone to give it up yet, they simply make analog service a little worse than it used to be. I think something similar is happening in DC right now.

Even more compelling is that the historic districts in DC have so many zoning restrictions that cable companies are installing their best and most expensive technology in the most impoverished areas because it is too difficult for them to get permission in the others.

― Aaron Grossman (aajjgg), Friday, 23 August 2002 12:13 (twenty-three years ago)

'hi, i'd like to order xxx xxx'

'xxx xxx avenue'

It's no wonder you can only get adult movies.

― lawrence kansas, Friday, 23 August 2002 13:01 (twenty-three years ago)

This would only be worth it if the movies were free.

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 23 August 2002 14:05 (twenty-three years ago)

'bad lesbian scenes'

there's no such thing!

― lawrence kansas, Friday, 23 August 2002 14:56 (twenty-three years ago)

I take it you never saw "Poison Ivy", then.

― Colin Meeder (Mert), Friday, 23 August 2002 15:10 (twenty-three years ago)

Just open the box and flip the switch that says "titties" to "disney". THen you can get diseny instead.

― Mike Hanle y (mike), Friday, 23 August 2002 15:55 (twenty-three years ago)

It was Summer Slam wasn't it?

― jel -- (jel), Friday, 23 August 2002 16:01 (twenty-three years ago)

hahaha yes.

also lawrence: i guess you've never seen 'claire of the moon' either? that movie = not a good first date choice, in case you were wondering.

― maura (maura), Friday, 23 August 2002 16:21 (twenty-three years ago)

good heavens, I've seen Poison Ivy and loved every bath water drinking part of it. never seen 'claire of the moon' but will use on second date as advised.

― lawrence kansas, Friday, 23 August 2002 16:53 (twenty-three years ago)

I don't understand: there is something in the tone of voice that implies complaint about this, but I can see nothing about which one could possibly want to complain.

And I'm with Lawrence: any film called Triple-X Triple-X is quite likely to have some sex in it. You could sue if it didn't, I'd have thought.

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Friday, 23 August 2002 16:54 (twenty-three years ago)

you mean Summer Slam isn't an adult rated movie?

― david h (david h), Friday, 23 August 2002 16:56 (twenty-three years ago)

No fair. you have cable.

― Sterling Clover (s_clover), Friday, 23 August 2002 18:43 (twenty-three years ago)

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