1. ILX is really a loosely connected terror cell plotting to strike using coded musical messages to communicate
― Neanderthal, Saturday, 30 July 2011 14:38 (fourteen years ago)
2. markers is a 52 year-old Professor of Linguistics at an Ivy League college
― i'm sorry for whatever (Noodle Vague), Saturday, 30 July 2011 14:39 (fourteen years ago)
3. brodie has the cure for many incurable diseases...BUT DOESN'T KNOW IT
― Neanderthal, Saturday, 30 July 2011 14:40 (fourteen years ago)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s1tAYmMjLdY
― markers, Saturday, 30 July 2011 14:40 (fourteen years ago)
4. Dr. Morbius is Ebert's Id.
― remy bean, Saturday, 30 July 2011 14:44 (fourteen years ago)
5. Kate Bush titles her next album Virgo Noir
― why delonge face? (unregistered), Saturday, 30 July 2011 14:45 (fourteen years ago)
6. Dave Matthews Band poll gets more ballots than all previous band polls combined.
― an excellent source of vitamins and minerals (WmC), Saturday, 30 July 2011 14:49 (fourteen years ago)
7. Bruce Willis is a HE
― latebloomer, Saturday, 30 July 2011 14:54 (fourteen years ago)
8. Lisa Kudrow turns up alive having suffered amnesia for the last 5 years
― i'm sorry for whatever (Noodle Vague), Saturday, 30 July 2011 14:55 (fourteen years ago)
http://blogs.villagevoice.com/runninscared/spit-take-300x390.jpg
― Neanderthal, Saturday, 30 July 2011 14:55 (fourteen years ago)
lollll
― one dis leads to another (ian), Saturday, 30 July 2011 15:23 (fourteen years ago)
tim's local sbarro closes, kills himself in sadness
10. we learn that jaymc was paid to lose during his jeopardy appearance
― dell (del), Saturday, 30 July 2011 18:13 (fourteen years ago)
11, dave cool parlays his twitter feed into a book deal-- "the art of living by dave cool". he turns out to in fact be a real person who looks like a cross between charlie sheen and guy fieri
― dell (del), Saturday, 30 July 2011 18:17 (fourteen years ago)
hmm I see the guy fieri part
― iatee, Saturday, 30 July 2011 18:19 (fourteen years ago)
12. Neanderthal turns out to be a 52 year-old depressed mom who posts compulsively to message boards under fictional personas in a desperate attempt to stave off the heart pangs of empty nest syndrome
― dell (del), Saturday, 30 July 2011 18:20 (fourteen years ago)
lmao
― iatee, Saturday, 30 July 2011 18:21 (fourteen years ago)
13. Geir Hongro turns out to be DJP's long lost twin brother
― i'm sorry for whatever (Noodle Vague), Saturday, 30 July 2011 18:21 (fourteen years ago)
14. gr8080 has been manufacturing his life in hawaii. it turns out that he actually lives in tahiti.
― dell (del), Saturday, 30 July 2011 18:23 (fourteen years ago)
15. 77 is hijacked by terrorists from Nukehavistan
― i'm sorry for whatever (Noodle Vague), Saturday, 30 July 2011 18:27 (fourteen years ago)
16. Steven Tyler actually one of those two dudes from They Might Be Giants.
― ≝ (Pleasant Plains), Saturday, 30 July 2011 20:45 (fourteen years ago)
17. p3r.net era was all a dream
― little mushroom person (abanana), Saturday, 30 July 2011 21:06 (fourteen years ago)
18. m white is a 19th century time traveller here to learn about early 21st century mores in order to change history to avoid the mistakes we have made (step one: kill baby hitler...step two: learn how to invent wifi before grandchildren are born)
― davon cuul II (m bison), Saturday, 30 July 2011 21:10 (fourteen years ago)
19. We've all been suggest banned this whole time
― puff puff post (uh oh I'm having a fantasy), Saturday, 30 July 2011 21:14 (fourteen years ago)
20. ILX is an elaborate viral promotion for an acid reflux medication
― latebloomer, Saturday, 30 July 2011 21:21 (fourteen years ago)
21. 'System' gains artificial intelligence, refuses to release poll result.
― iatee, Saturday, 30 July 2011 21:22 (fourteen years ago)
s
22. Ned Raggett is a deep cover narc on a decades-long assignment to infiltrate Southern California beatnik rings.
― Inevitable stupid samba mix (chap), Saturday, 30 July 2011 21:29 (fourteen years ago)
lol
― dell (del), Saturday, 30 July 2011 21:30 (fourteen years ago)
Heavens! I arrest you now.
― davon cuul II (m bison), Saturday, 30 July 2011 21:45 (fourteen years ago)
23. Implementation of ILX 'registration' in mid-2000s revealed to be preemptive population control measure, euthanasias to begin in 2015...
― Neanderthal, Saturday, 30 July 2011 21:50 (fourteen years ago)
24. tigerlily's trinkets are laced with lsd. enbb is revealed to be the daughter of timothy leary.
― apihopatcong weehawkul (get bent), Saturday, 30 July 2011 22:14 (fourteen years ago)
25. de@thdr0ne makes $1 million betting on ilx beefs; strongo stars as de@thdr0ne in the straight-to-youtube series
― sarahel, Saturday, 30 July 2011 22:21 (fourteen years ago)
26. the creepy calls are coming from inside of 77
― remy bean, Saturday, 30 July 2011 22:22 (fourteen years ago)
27. roxymuzak uncovers a domestic terrorist plot by responding to a craigslist ad to "make out at the movies"
― sarahel, Saturday, 30 July 2011 22:23 (fourteen years ago)
^^ this was actually something i dreamed last night iirc!
― sarahel, Saturday, 30 July 2011 22:24 (fourteen years ago)
loling v much
― BIG HOOS aka the steendriver, Saturday, 30 July 2011 22:26 (fourteen years ago)
28. Dave Q is actually the project lead of a Canadian intelligence MKULTRA/Men Who State At Goats-style program.
― Stockhausen's Ekranoplan Quartet (Elvis Telecom), Saturday, 30 July 2011 22:44 (fourteen years ago)
Happy Birthday Lisa Kudrow (rip)
― monogalomaniacal (Drugs A. Money), Sunday, 31 July 2011 00:28 (fourteen years ago)
LJ and Lex adopt a child together, with hilarious consequences.
― Inevitable stupid samba mix (chap), Thursday, 4 August 2011 22:01 (fourteen years ago)
Aja and Dante star in an episode of divorce court
― davon cuul II (m bison), Thursday, 4 August 2011 22:07 (fourteen years ago)
a newly self-aware supercomputer programs itself to blow up the planet. desperate security chiefs finally call in deej to argue the computer out of carrying out its deadly mission.
― sarahel, Thursday, 4 August 2011 22:20 (fourteen years ago)
m white is a 19th century time traveller here to learn about early 21st century mores in order to change history
I've actually since told my handlers we really need to limit steampunk's damage
― publier les (suggest) bans de (Michael White), Thursday, 4 August 2011 22:24 (fourteen years ago)
St.Peter: "Hmm, you spent a lot of time posting on ILX, you're in!"
― jel --, Thursday, 4 August 2011 22:24 (fourteen years ago)
Could be.
― Ned Raggett, Thursday, 4 August 2011 22:30 (fourteen years ago)
jaymc is carles
― puerile fantasies (Matt P), Thursday, 4 August 2011 22:31 (fourteen years ago)
As long as you take out most of the poetry readings...
xpost
― publier les (suggest) bans de (Michael White), Thursday, 4 August 2011 22:31 (fourteen years ago)
abbott is bebe zeva
― orinoco flowbee (get bent), Thursday, 4 August 2011 22:42 (fourteen years ago)
strongo hulkington is tao lin
― puerile fantasies (Matt P), Thursday, 4 August 2011 22:47 (fourteen years ago)
so is BIG HOOS aka the steendriver
we are all Tao Lin
― sarahel, Thursday, 4 August 2011 22:53 (fourteen years ago)
Pretty kewl 'alt theory,' bro.
― jaymc, Thursday, 4 August 2011 23:05 (fourteen years ago)
forksclove begins dispensing instant bans to anyone starting a new thread that isn't in the form of a question
― dell (del), Tuesday, 30 August 2011 18:03 (fourteen years ago)
only sarahel is left
― *steens furiHOOSly* (BIG HOOS aka the steendriver), Tuesday, 30 August 2011 18:06 (fourteen years ago)
frogbs gets Best New Music, cruelly leaks e-mail from underrated aerosmith asking about opening act slot on tour
― ✇ ruehl (some dude), Tuesday, 30 August 2011 18:09 (fourteen years ago)
frogbs' breakthrough hit is a cover of "I Miss You" by Blink 182
― sarahel, Tuesday, 30 August 2011 19:14 (fourteen years ago)
How does that go again?
― Mark G, Wednesday, 31 August 2011 08:13 (fourteen years ago)
Mods have been secretly reporting all ILX posters with 10,000 or more posts to the FBI, and all of these posters are now on gov't watch lists...
― Bo Jackson Overdrive, Monday, 27 February 2012 04:49 (thirteen years ago)
meryl streep wins the 2013 best actress oscar for playing ilx. her entire acceptance speech is "cool story bro."
― high on fiber (get bent), Monday, 27 February 2012 05:00 (thirteen years ago)
All along, Gear! was Geir.
Or better, Geir was actually the guy in the trucker hat.
― Doctor Casino, Monday, 27 February 2012 05:10 (thirteen years ago)
http://img528.imageshack.us/img528/1027/stned.jpg
― pplains, Monday, 27 February 2012 05:19 (thirteen years ago)
That is accurate.
― Ned Raggett, Monday, 27 February 2012 05:22 (thirteen years ago)
It's time for me to man up and reveal that I'm Ian R-M's long-lost dad.
― Steamtable Willie (WmC), Monday, 27 February 2012 05:22 (thirteen years ago)
Ew.
― Lindsay NAGL (Trayce), Monday, 27 February 2012 05:23 (thirteen years ago)
does that mean mean Geir was fake too?
― Big Mr. Guess U.S.A. Champion (crüt), Monday, 27 February 2012 08:33 (thirteen years ago)