worst Amazon items ever

http://www.amazon.com/GE-AM-STEREO-HEADPHONE-RADIO/dp/B0002ONGKK/ref=sr_1_1?s=electronics&ie=UTF8&qid=1314882835&sr=1-1

http://www.amazon.com/Nosefrida-The-Snotsucker-Nasal-Aspirator/dp/B00171WXII/ref=sr_1_1?s=electronics&ie=UTF8&qid=1314883037&sr=1-1

I have been waiting to post this forever. The first user review is... the funniest thing I have ever read on amazon.

http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/81WVk3wjikL._AA1500_.jpg

5.0 out of 5 stars IT SUCKS BOOGIES & catches them in a tube to eat later, December 2, 2010

By Moobs (New York, NY) - See all my reviews

Amazon Verified Purchase(What's this?)

This review is from: Nosefrida The Snotsucker Nasal Aspirator (Baby Product)

my wife has tiny nostrils. i can't fit any of my fingers in her nose...it's amazing she can breathe through her nose at all. consequently, our son is also lacking in the nostril-diameter department. he gets boogies...he can't breathe very well...he gets upset. it's been like that since he was born, whenever that was...recently. i forget, but i digress. we came home from the hospital with a pretty decent nose-sucking bulb...it did a reasonably OK job of sucking out boogers...and was reasonably firm and springy. but then our dog ate it. so, i tried to find a replacement. not all bulbs are created equal, i soon found out. some were too hard to squeeze and didn't spring back quickly enough. others were too soft to suck anything out and just sat there, mocking me. i tried at least four different replacement bulbs, none of which were as good as the one from the hospital. we even tried a fancy battery powered nose vacuum that made a whirring sound but produced nary a single lump of green gold. while ordering the various, useless bulbs i also ordered this thing - the nosefrida - on a whim thinking i was probably wasting $13.

BOY WAS I WRONG.

this thing works. it sucks boogers out of noses. it even stores them in a little tube to eat later. or, you can just wash them out in the sink. anyway...it works better than any of the other things we tried...and we tried pretty much everything. there's a technique to it:

- suck in quick short bursts with your mouth muscles first...to loosen things up
- then, suck in long hoover-style bursts to get those boogies out
- if the boogies get stuck near the surface, try pulling the end of the thing out a little mid-suck a few times
- use a tissue or q-tip to get any nose goblins that are loitering anywhere accessible
- repeat

if i was a professional booger sucker...and it was my job to suck the snot out of noses 8 hours a day, i would insist on using this thing. but i would want a longer tube, and a holster.

i hate you

i read that to my sixth graders last year ^^^ was most popular teacher ever

ugh...

I guess I have been outdone but I thought it funyn that the walkman isnt even a GE and its listed at 1000$

I bet I could get $500 for mine, at least. It even comes with a mix tape I made of swordfishtrombones, cure imports, and the eighth bad religion album.

I guess they probably will be worht more as people stop making them but a grand!?!?!

thi slokks laso dumb
http://www.amazon.com/AO-Safety-90541-WorkTunes-Protector/dp/B0013092CS/ref=pd_sim_sbs_e_1

"green gold"

all credit to Je55e for this:

http://www.amazon.com/Control-Christian-Marriages-Priesthood-Children/dp/1425992609/ref=tag_stp_s2f_edpp_amazon15es

http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/41Tq9h3AWHL._BO2,204,203,200_PIsitb-sticker-arrow-click,TopRight,35,-76_AA300_SH20_OU01_.jpg

Book Description

THIS IS A HOLYSPIRIT MANUSCRIPT BOOK: WHEN YOU BUY THIS BOOK YOU WILL BE READING A HOLYSPIRIT DIRECTED BOOK FROM GOD; & *CHRIST JESUS. THIS BOOK IS GODS HOLYSPIRIT VOICE: THE CALL FOR ALL CHRISTIANS & CHURCHES TO REPENT FROM ALL THEIR SINS: EVEN FROM FALSE CHRIST TEACHINGS. BIRTH CONTROL SINS HAVE CURSE THE CHURCH WITH SPIRITUAL WHOREDOM & FALSE WORSHIP. RESULTING IN THE PERSECUTIONS: AGAINST THE HOLY PEOPLE. THIS BOOK MAY BE REVISED: BECAUSE OF COMPUTER DICTATORS: MANY WORDS IN THIS BOOK: MADE HAVE BEEN CHANGED: TO>>DISCREDIT: THE AUTHOR. BUT IN TRUTH: I AM A HOLYSPIRIT CHOSEN ANOINTED DISCIPLE FOR GOD & CHRIST JESUS. EVEN FOR JEWS, MUSLIMS & GENTILE SINNERS. MANY PEOPLE WILL LEARN HOW TO> BECOME REAL BORN AGAIN CHRISTIAN: THROUGH THIS HOLYSPIRIT BOOK & THROUGH THE PROTECTION & SUPPORT OF MY HOLYSPIRIT LIFE!! JOHN 3 & 15. ALL NATIONS WILL OVER COME THE SINS OF BIRTH CONTROL. *BECAUSE HOLY DOMINIONSHIP IS ONE OF THE FIRST COMMANDMENT IN GENESIS 1;26-31. ALL BELIEVERS: WILL COME TO A HOLY VOW OF REPENTANCE: THROUGH GODS RESTORATION & THROUGH GODS ADOPTION VOWS. YES!! THE KINGDOM OF GOD & HEAVEN!! IS AT HAND!! FOR ALL WHO BELIEVE IN THE ONE CREATOR GOD & CHRIST JESUS OUR HOLYSPIRIT ETERNAL LIFE SAVIOR: SURELY YOUR NAMES WILL BE WRITTEN IN THE LAMBS BOOK OF LIFE!! *WHEN YOU SUPPORT & PROTECT MY HOLYSPIRIT LIFE.

Buy it now for 130.98!

IT SUCKS BOOGIES & catches them in a tube to eat later

god is nigh illiterate, corey

looks at the user submitted pics for that book

THIS BOOK MAY BE REVISED: BECAUSE OF COMPUTER DICTATORS: MANY WORDS IN THIS BOOK: MADE HAVE BEEN CHANGED: TO>>DISCREDIT: THE AUTHOR.

You never her.

http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/61RaOEdaZCL.jpg

i would send that out for merry christmas cards

I never realized Palin was so big

http://www.amazon.com/gp/offer-listing/B008TDSFFM/ref=sr_1_16_olp?ie=UTF8&qid=1350134711&sr=8-16&keywords=teach+yourself+trigonometry&condition=used

only $9,999 for a used trig text!

+ $3.99 shipping

Whoa I think I used to have that book, I shall ring my parents and let them know that untold riches may be lying somewhere in their attic

My mother probably also had the 60s/70s Teach Yourself Trigonometry with the austere yellow and black cover

what makes it worse is that the same book is going for a penny + shipping elsewhere!

by what logic do people price shit like this?

to be fair they are also selling a new one for a 300th of the price.

with the austere yellow and black cover

I had a whole pile of these, including 'Teach Yourself Elocution'.

sometimes in MMORPGs ppl post really cheap + worthless items to the auction house bc they are buying gold online - so they pay real $$'s and then the gold seller goes and buys the worthless junk for the overpriced amount and that's how they launder/transfer the gold. maybe criminal organizations are laundering money through trig textbooks on amazon?

isn't $9,999 the default value that is displayed if someone didn't enter a selling price? I think I read that somewhere once.

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you...The Wine Rack

http://www.amazon.com/The-WineRack-200-008-Wine-Medium/dp/B001FYZZI2/ref=sr_1_11?s=home-garden&ie=UTF8&qid=1352743312&sr=1-11&keywords=wine+rack

http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/51zxx2Y5HSL.jpg

The Winerack every girls best friend. Turn an A cup in to double Ds and sport your favorite beverage for yourself and your friends. Better than a Boob Job and Cheaper Too. Not to mention the savings on over priced drinks. We developed The Winerack to Fill Out our product line if you will. The picture shown here is of our good friend Drea, who is not, no offense Drea, Well Endowed. Sporting the Winerack and Voila’ Drea’s giving Pamela Anderson a run for the money. Take a bottle of wine, a mixed drink or even a fifth of your favorite hard stuff to the movies, concerts, ball games, even PTA meetings. Sporting a rack that will turn heads and serving a beverage that will have guys standing in line for a sip of your secret stash. With simple blow into the tube it's easy to keep that full look even as you drink from your secret stash.

See also The Beer Belly.

5.0 out of 5 stars Just what I ordered ., January 12, 2012
By Sueellen44 - See all my reviewsAmazon Verified Purchase(What's this?)
This review is from: The WineRack 200-008 The Wine Rack, Medium (Sports)
My son wanted this for a gift exchange at high school. I was a little concerned at first but then he assured me she is a runner and she could use it to put gator aide or water in it, so I bought it and the girl was happy with her wine rack! Great gift!

I knew about the beer belly, I just didn't know they did wine boobs

Hahah my former SIL had one of those and wore it to football games! It was pretty awesome TBH.

See also The Grass Arse for secret carrying of smokable leafs and other items, if you get my drift.

aka The Mule? :)

Well I was thinking something more like a pair of underpants with pockets in the back.

oh poor naive Sueellen44

btw this is also terrible: http://www.amazon.com/pal-Happy-Man-Bottle-Opener/dp/B002J46RS4/ref=pd_sim_hg_7

http://www.amazon.com/Nosefrida-The-Snotsucker-Nasal-Aspirator/dp/B00171WXII/ref=sr_1_1?s=electronics&ie=UTF8&qid=1314883037&sr=1-1

I have been waiting to post this forever. The first user review is... the funniest thing I have ever read on amazon.

― notorious ilx wet noodle (remy bean), Thursday, September 1, 2011 9:17 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I own this. No joke.

K hates the fuck out of it though. I think we may have traumatized her by even trying to use it a couple of times.

Baby boogers are a legit problem though, y'all don't understand. There's just no good way.

Worst Amazon 'item' ever might be the representative they sent to stand before the Public Account's Committee to explain their apparent tax evasion.

MPs condemn Amazon executive over tax payments

we have (and have used) that snotsucker too! i think it's standard issue.

we own that. i recognize there are like 3 levels of security, like you're safeguarding against a plague, but jeez i have nightmares about things going awry.

Re-read this thread this morning for ILX Secret Santa ideas. Anyway, the top review for the Wine Rack, omg:

My boss has this thing about his employees drinking at work. And when I say "this thing" I mean he doesn't let us do it.

Once my office installed metal detectors at every entrance to the building, my days of sneaking in a flask were over. Fortunately, I was able to satiate my day-drunk cravings by soaking gummy bears in vodka overnight and eating them at work the next day. While disguising my intoxication was never an issue, my rapid 30-pound weight gain and obvious constipation issues quickly triggered a number of alarms with upper management.

I needed a new way to get hammered at work, and I needed it now.

After having a water cooler discussion with a well-endowed girl in the office, my mind drifted from the conversation to her chest -- was there a way to sneak booze into a bra?

Wouldn't you know it -- there is!

The Wine Rack is a comfortable sports bra with a removable polyurethane bladder that can hold up to 25-ounces (750ml) of your favorite cocktail (in my case, Jägermeister). The long drinking tube tucks nicely into the bra when not in use and easily reaches my mouth when I need a drink. Whether you need a big gulp, or just a sip, the on/off valve lets you control the flow of your beverage with relative ease.

Just be sure not to drink too quickly, otherwise your rapidly-decreasing bust size will invite its fair share of questions.

While the bra is machine-washable, the bladder must be hand-washed, but that hardly deters me from using it every day. The Wine Rack comfortably fits anyone who wears a 34C-38C bra, but be forewarned that it's a little loose on average-sized guys like myself.

The visible bra straps through my dress shirts occasionally raise a few eyebrows, but so far I've been able to easily dismiss them as part of my therapeutic back brace. And don't be too concerned about the sloshing noise you make as you walk down the hall -- it's minimum, at best.

Cheers!

The gummy bear solution seems all too real

some ideas can only be produced by a truly desperate mind.

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B003I64BSU/

This BOOL is ONLY for powerful males. Not for women or plain guys.

Alexa’s 'evil laugh' is freaking people out. Amazon says it’s ‘working to fix it’

So Alexa decided to laugh randomly while I was in the kitchen. Freaked @SnootyJuicer and I out. I thought a kid was laughing behind me. pic.twitter.com/6dblzkiQHp

— CaptHandlebar (@CaptHandlebar) February 23, 2018

we were at CHOP earlier this week and there's a little child's voice who announces all the elevator stops and it is extremely creepy

This probably counts as a bad Amazon item.

https://theintercept.com/2022/02/17/amazon-ice-deportation-flights-omni/

not been buying from Amazon in a while but heard earlier that they are closing down Book Depository which was a handy book shop run by them.
Stopping on April 26th

wtf I didn’t know they were Amazon!!

There was a time I would have been glad to have a Snotsucker. I used to use the squeezable bulbs.