The U.S. Postal Service: "I Was Deliberately Wasting Your Time, Sir"

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Here in Seattle, I have mail to drop off at the post office on average every 2 days; I would think I am a fairly familiar figure to each of the tellers at the 3 local branches nearest where I live. I always ask for first-class delivery on domestic packages and always pay by cash--we're talking 99.9% of the time, here. So, why is it that they always insist on looking up other rates anyway (which are always more expensive; they've never come up with a cheaper option for me) when they know full well I prefer first-class? Why is it that they always ask me how I'm going to be paying, when they know full well how I'm going to be paying? Then there's the scripts... ostensibly mandated by the Post Office (e.g. "Just to remind you, sir, you could have payed with a debit or credit card"; no kidding!), which they usually deliver with some degree of Orwellian terror, as if I'm with the F.B.I. checking to make sure they give that bit of inane information.

It's pretty much no wonder their lines are always extensive, but really...it's just pure insanity to me. So, are they passive-aggressive, trying to slowly drive me crazy with the inefficiency of these questions, scripts routines? Or are they truly oblivious to how braindead this is to go through the same silly questions each and every time, when I've dealt with each of them a thousand times already and do the same, exact thing 99.9% of the time I'm in there? If I want stamps, I'll ask for them. If I want to pay by debit or credit card, I will. And if I didn't know whether I could or not, I'd ask. I don't need to be told these things each and every time I see them.

From the East Coast (where I'm originally from)--say, my experiences in the post offices when I lived in NYC--it was closer to: better know what you want-here it is-get the fuck out of here. Soup Nazi-ville, comparatively, but at least it was a hell of a lot faster.

― Joe, Saturday, 11 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I buy very specfic stamps depending on where the package is going . This pisses everyone off.

― anthony, Saturday, 11 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Joe, just be glad you don't live in England, where service personnel move at a pace suggestive of a deep-sea diver on 25 quaaludes and lifting a finger to help anyone is seen as betrayal of working-class solidarity. Imagine if your local post office decided to close whenever they felt like it, or if one day they just said, "We're all out of stamps, now fuck off." Of course, the American flair for efficiency means that sometimes people crack under the strain and waste some co-workers, but as long as I get my mail out, I'm happy!

― dave q, Saturday, 11 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

it sounds suspiciously like what I had to learn off by heart when I was a checkout chick ie Mode of Sale sheets that list everything you are supposed to do or say. Under threat of three strikes and yr sacked, we had to learn the things off by heart -two pages worth of Greet the customer, ask the customer,"will this be pick up or delivery" - and then we'd have plain clothes ppl who would come through our registers to check that we did it correctly...bastards.

― Geoff, Saturday, 11 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

"Do you have a WH Smith's Club Card sir?"

Even when buying like a Mars bar. Or a pen.

― Graham, Saturday, 11 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

This pisses me off no end. I also have a particular problem with the Post Office doing it (plus, the 'personal' announcements, 'Cashier number two please', argh) but WH Smiths, Safeway, all of them, they can go to hell. I much prefer going in to Marks & Spencers and getting looked down on by the cashiers for wearing jeans in there.

I was once in a particularly good mood going through a Sainsbury's counter and tried to strike up a conversation with the guy at the checkout. He wouldn't answer any of my questions and just kept to the script with this scared look in his eyes. Trying to please everyone just means no-one is satisfied.

― John Davey, Saturday, 11 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I hate getting served by people who are required to use a script, especially in shops (they should tell their employers that Equity stipulates a minimum weekly salary of £350 per week, or that they don't have an Equity card etc). This is because working in low-wage places like these is ALREADY the thin end of the capitalism wedge and it gives really tightarse managers carte blanche to act like little dictators or just plain bullies. I'd rather people were helpful in shops as a part of their own free will.

― suzy, Saturday, 11 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

hem-ryods?

― Mike Hanley, Saturday, 11 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Hey - don't knock the US Postal Service.

― the pinefox, Sunday, 12 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Cause nobody would answer, naturally. Here it depends on who you have. I like to speak in a very condescending way to some of the clerks. I sometimes yell: WELL I HOPE THIS SAFETY GLASS IS ACID PROOF BECAUSE I HAVE A SPRAY GUN WITH ME. NOW LET THE STAMPS COME TO MAMAAAA.

Most of the time this helps you receive faster service. Most of the time I smack-kiss the ground outside the postal office.

― nathalie, Sunday, 12 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

one month passes...

That Seinfeld episode where Kramer comes up against the might of the US Postal Service was on the other day. Man it was funny.

― Nick, Saturday, 22 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

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