your grandmother's exclamations

"horrors!"

"what a PALAVER!"

(NB she is not british, she is from the deep south)

"mussel SHOALS!"

"mama, why are you shouting 'mussel shoals'?"

"it's the biggest dam i know"

Not even going to attempt to transliterate Maths Granny's African swears.

Scientist Granny, I inherited her signature phrase, which was "xxxxx, a Nonsense!"

So if she disapproved of something or someone, she would say "Mr Hand, a Nonsense!"

If that's not a proto-Radiohead song title, I don't know what is!

"manitoba!"

"chappie" and "good grief!"

Oh, when delighted: "doubleh-vay!", like the French W. I love that one.

WCC, "a nonsense!" sounds so useful!

"Oh God Bless America!" with heaps of scorn and irony so it was perfectly clear what she really wanted to say.

"crumbs!"

(note, my grandfather is not Ned Raggett)

drag fr jack, tbh

My grandma flipped me off once. Don't know if that counts.

"Well, well, well – three holes in the ground!"

"Goodness snakes!"

"Oh, I never..."

My paternal grandmother – in her late 90s when she died – had one stock expression for surprise, shock, horror, elation, affection. She'd vary the cadence, but it was always "How about that," with the about at least three scale notes higher than the how and about. Sometimes, when I'm surprised (shocked, startled, elated, whatever), I'll say the same thing in the same voice. I get some weird looks.

"Shit!"

good night nurse
oh my country tis of thee

"Land sakes"/"Land sakes alive."
"Gloriosky."

"mercy."

"Hang on the bell, Nell" for when anything needs patience/ lack of haste etc. turns out to be from a Rowan And Martin tv sketch. god knows how/why a Scouser picked up on this.

"Oh for any favour!"

^ never understood this, sounds like something you might say in a restoration comedy

especially with the "u"

"Sure but no."

"I thank you! And all my ancestors thank you!"

"I go... I come back!"

"What a cleverdickimus!"

No 2 there is an old radio catchphrase.

Ah, was it delivered in a Garbo-esque femme fatale fashion?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/It%27s_That_Man_Again says "Middle Eastern vendor" fashion.

My Gran says many of the catchphrases on that list. It's rare to visit and not hear "After you, Claude" or, from some other radio show of similar vintage (Educating Archie?), "I've arrived, and to prove it, I'm here."

My Nan's exclamations: "crikey", "well, blow me" (as in "down with a feather"). I await everyone's comedy misinterpretations of the latter, obv.

"A handbag?!"

"In a haaaaaahhhhhn-baaaaaag?"

Yes, I know that one, I always thought it was a Wilde reference.

Science Granny was also partial to reciting The Owl And The Pussycat from memory, especially when plied with sherry.

my grandfather said "well blow me down" when surprised and usually just snorted when displeased.

Did he ever say "I yam what I yam"?

xp none of my grandparents ever said that, I just thought that I'd throw it in and see if anyone noticed.

"God almighty knows," but it sounded more like "GAH doe MIGHTYnose"

"oh my law"

this was a non-blasphemous way of saying "oh my lord"

my grandpa favored "damn" "hell" and "sonuvabitch"

Instant classic thread, I have nothing to add but I need to make flashcards of all these and internalize them stat.

http://i2.listal.com/image/1320504/600full-father-ted-screenshot.jpg

not my grandma, but i wish she was!

"punch her in her lemonade stand!", holy crap this lady is awesome

http://margaretandhelen.com/2012/06/29/youre-damn-right-obama-cares-why-doesnt-romney/