Betty Crocker has come back from the dead to ruin my life for an entire year

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collect 'em all!

ron (ron), Friday, 20 September 2002 04:18 (twenty-three years ago)

mmmm man-pleasing appetizers

electric sound of jim (electricsound), Friday, 20 September 2002 04:31 (twenty-three years ago)

how many men are really gonna go bonkers for a cup of brown liquid with a piece of foliage sticking out the top?? and since when does that even qualify as an appetizer??

ron (ron), Friday, 20 September 2002 04:39 (twenty-three years ago)

Yessssssssss.

Betty Crocker will never die.

God, I SO NEED these recipe cards.

rosemary (rosemary), Friday, 20 September 2002 04:43 (twenty-three years ago)

Yes, Jim. And here are the recipes to these wonderful virile tongue-moisteners (from the back of the card):

POW!




  • 2 cans condensed beef broth (bouillon)

  • 1 copy water

  • 1 1/4 teaspoons horseradish

  • 1/4 teaspoon dill weed


Heat all ingredients to simmering, stirring occasionally. Serve hot with celery "swizzle sticks" 6 servings (about 1/2 cup each).


RUMAKI




  • 6 chicken livers

  • 4 water chestnuts

  • Teriyaki Sauce (below)

  • 6 slices bacon, cut in half

  • Brown sugar


Cut chicken livers in half; cut each water chestnut into 3 pieces. Pour Teriyaki Sauce over chicken livers and water chestnuts in bowl; refrigerate about 4 hours. Drain. Wrap a piece of chicken liver and a piece of water chestnut in each bacon slice.

Secure with wooden prick; roll in brown sugar. Set oven control at broil and/or 550 degrees. Broil 3 to 4 inches from heat 10 minutes or until bacon is crisp, turning occasionally.12 appetizers

Teriyaki Sauce: Mix 1/4 cup salad oil, 1/4 cup soy sauce, 2 tablespoons catsup, 1 tablespoon vinegar, 1/4 teaspoon pepper and 2 cloves garlic, crushed.

donut bitch (donut), Friday, 20 September 2002 04:46 (twenty-three years ago)

ahem, that should be "wooden pick"

donut bitch (donut), Friday, 20 September 2002 04:47 (twenty-three years ago)

Ha ha ha, is this were I mention that I have a Good Housekeeping cookbook that has a recipe for "Blue Balls" ?

rosemary (rosemary), Friday, 20 September 2002 04:52 (twenty-three years ago)

"Ladies Seafood Thermidor"?????

New "tastes like tuna" observation? ewwwwww

C J (C J), Friday, 20 September 2002 04:56 (twenty-three years ago)

if anyone ever tries to serve me a steaming cup of beef broth and a bunch of chicken livers, they get slapped ;-)

ron (ron), Friday, 20 September 2002 05:26 (twenty-three years ago)

Oh, NOW you tell me, ron!!

rosemary (rosemary), Friday, 20 September 2002 06:00 (twenty-three years ago)

yes, ron, that's what it says: "man-pleasing"

felicity (felicity), Friday, 20 September 2002 06:05 (twenty-three years ago)

it's supposed to get you excited like that

felicity (felicity), Friday, 20 September 2002 06:09 (twenty-three years ago)

he didn't say with his dick.

jess (dubplatestyle), Friday, 20 September 2002 06:11 (twenty-three years ago)

unless he meant his "swizzle stick."

jess (dubplatestyle), Friday, 20 September 2002 06:14 (twenty-three years ago)

who knows better what he meant? him? or me.

felicity (felicity), Friday, 20 September 2002 06:18 (twenty-three years ago)

baby jesus.

jess (dubplatestyle), Friday, 20 September 2002 06:21 (twenty-three years ago)

what the hell is wrong with beef broth?

Josh (Josh), Friday, 20 September 2002 06:26 (twenty-three years ago)

REAL MAN, EXHIBIT A: Josh Kortbein

donut bitch (donut), Friday, 20 September 2002 06:53 (twenty-three years ago)

dude, this looks like stuff that would be served at the mike hanle y dinner party (and i mean that in a good way!!)

The 'adventures in space' is the best - check out the inverted blood-red deathstar-shaped jello mold (the mark of satan obv.) and the forlorn-looking boy-king made out of bread (?!) with his lame-o jelly bean space-helmet.

also the beheaded clown with the mysterious cookie filling!!

geeta (geeta), Friday, 20 September 2002 07:35 (twenty-three years ago)

ladies seafood thermidor looks like you pour it thru ramosi's barf nozzle

"come for coffee"!!!

mark s (mark s), Friday, 20 September 2002 08:18 (twenty-three years ago)

I prefer milk, Mark.

Colin Meeder (Mert), Friday, 20 September 2002 08:52 (twenty-three years ago)

One of the most horrible things I've ever eaten - 'Betty Crocker's fake bacon bits'

Andrew L (Andrew L), Friday, 20 September 2002 08:53 (twenty-three years ago)

a veritable euphemism minefield

felicity (felicity), Friday, 20 September 2002 09:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Ah yes -- I've seen this legendary collection of the DB's before. "More Fruits Ablaze" was treasured by the local circle.

Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 20 September 2002 14:30 (twenty-three years ago)

I still don't quite understand why American cuisine pre-195X was 90% about how the food looked or was shaped than how it, like, tasted.

(Actually I recall reading that WWII was the big watershed for American cuisine, insofar as soldiers came back from Italy and France and told people amazing stories about how they used these exotic things called "spices" and "seasoning" over there -- which U.S. cuisine remained massively afraid of even as they assimilated them: the first use of garlic in a Crocker book calls for one clove in an entire large saucepan of spaghetti sauce, and you were meant to stick the clove on a toothpick so you could take it out later.)

nabisco (nabisco), Friday, 20 September 2002 14:45 (twenty-three years ago)

Now why didn't "canned vegetables in whimsically shaped gelatin molds" take off on the other side of the Atlantic?

nabisco (nabisco), Friday, 20 September 2002 14:47 (twenty-three years ago)

THIS THREAD IS HEAVEN ON EARTH.

Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 20 September 2002 16:12 (twenty-three years ago)

"We Americans have figured out that the important thing about food is that it looks like something that is not food."

"Have you thought about maybe bothering with the taste a bit?"

"Okay but can it still be a bit about making little cookie aliens?"

nabisco (nabisco), Friday, 20 September 2002 17:15 (twenty-three years ago)

"muffin, please" "normal or whistle?" "whistle, please" "what color hook, dear?" "oh it doesn't matter, thank you here's a quarter with a harmonica dangling from it"

Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Friday, 20 September 2002 17:20 (twenty-three years ago)

RAV0R CUPCAX0R!

donut bitch (donut), Friday, 20 September 2002 17:57 (twenty-three years ago)

PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!PLUR!

Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 20 September 2002 18:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Just the thought of coffee + oranges with cloves in them is making me nauseous.

lyra (lyra), Friday, 20 September 2002 18:12 (twenty-three years ago)

I was mad obsessed with those recipe card sets (and cookbooks in general) when I was a kid. I subscribed to one recipe-card-club-thing, and had maybe two or three other sets that I bought at garage sales.

In retrospect, these card sets were recipes for people with a complete lack of imagination (or faith in their cooking skills) -- each card has a color picture so's you could agonize whether your finished dish "looked right" or not. And they were tragic waste of space, anyway. A moderately-sized cookbook could fit all those recipes and more in a size smaller than the avocado or rust-colored plastic box the cards came in.

Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Friday, 20 September 2002 19:11 (twenty-three years ago)

COME TO CANDY DANDY

... (donut), Friday, 20 September 2002 19:18 (twenty-three years ago)

I thought the pictures were so that when you serve up the food you could show your guests or whoever the picture saying "Try to imagine it looks like this, then you might be able to stand to put it in your mouth." (There may be extensions possible to this principle.)

Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Friday, 20 September 2002 19:27 (twenty-three years ago)

Dammit, Martin... I EXPECT my Cranberry Pancake Supper to be served on a table made out of prop walls from the Mike Douglas show!

donut bitch (donut), Friday, 20 September 2002 19:29 (twenty-three years ago)

"Adventure in Space" is a fine name for a meal.

Sean (Sean), Friday, 20 September 2002 19:32 (twenty-three years ago)

There's something enjoyably bold and obvious about calling it "Lardy Cake."

Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 20 September 2002 20:07 (twenty-three years ago)

I want the nursery train for my birthday or I will die!!!!!!!!!

Aaron Grossman (aajjgg), Friday, 20 September 2002 20:08 (twenty-three years ago)

Whats in the Prune and Marshmallow Coupe? Looks to me like they just tossed a couple of prunes and marshmallows on the top of some cereal.

gazza, Friday, 20 September 2002 20:24 (twenty-three years ago)

Cornflour Mold? EEEEEEEEW.

Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 20 September 2002 20:28 (twenty-three years ago)

Looks to me like they just tossed a couple of prunes and marshmallows on the top of some cereal.

Bananas, cream, walnut halves...

donut bitch (donut), Friday, 20 September 2002 20:54 (twenty-three years ago)

Please don't tell me you eat Prunes and Marshmellow together...I hope you have sevral bathrooms for you guests

brg30 (brg30), Friday, 20 September 2002 20:59 (twenty-three years ago)

hmmm...prunes and marshmallows are rather an odd combination to say the least - and those open corn beef sandwhiches , well , someone should close them quickly.

Actually this whole thing has made me feel quite ill.

gazza, Friday, 20 September 2002 21:16 (twenty-three years ago)

Prunes are an honorable fruit product! I will NOT have them maligned!

Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Friday, 20 September 2002 21:37 (twenty-three years ago)

Thank you, Crow.

Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 20 September 2002 21:41 (twenty-three years ago)

well yes, Prunes in and of themselves are fine , its just the rather startling and ....err... shall we say ECLECTIC prune/marshmallow combo that does my head in.

gazza, Friday, 20 September 2002 21:49 (twenty-three years ago)

fruit suet pudding - rainy needs to make some

all aboard the nursery train! next stop: tummy ache!

ron (ron), Friday, 20 September 2002 23:42 (twenty-three years ago)

My mom had a box of those when I was a kid -- I don't think she ever actually cooked anything from it (to be honest she's not big on cooking), but I always thought the pictures were fantastic. I wanted little smiley face foods and such.

Nicole (Nicole), Saturday, 21 September 2002 00:13 (twenty-three years ago)

ron, that was funny.

Last night I did unspeakable, de Sadelike things to a roasting chicken with a trussing needle and food processor. Madame de Saint-Ange and Dolmance would have approved.

felicity (felicity), Saturday, 21 September 2002 08:14 (twenty-three years ago)

nabisco, throughout the first half of the 20th century, the GRAND IDEAL of cookery was High Bourgeois French Cuisine (as typified by Escoffier etc): which at that time was dominated by ideals of SCALE and SPECTACLE (ingredient richness AND architectural complexity)

cookery-as-domestic-art between the wars was about impressing yr guests (= yr husband's boss, for example), and after the wars got caught i think between the triple poles of massification (ultimately a good thing, initially a catastrophe), paucity of affordable ingredients (which obv did not bother eg escoffier) and (relative) success of PRESENTATION as a device.

LOOK is of course empirically checkable in a way taste is not, if yr in an extreme situation of cultural intimidation: my Pork Gelatin Palace of Versaille looks like the picture = I am a Kitchen God. It tastes yuck = how the hell do I know what posh food tastes like? Rich ppl eat anchovies and olives ew ew ew!!! (If I wanted to be sarcastic and combative I wd compare this to Academic Institutionalised Modernism in the arts...)

Frm the 60s onwards, a Trust yr Own Tastebuds democratisation* combined with a upper fashion revulsion at Archietectural Pretension. In the UK the really posh often lived in spartan semi-squalor anyway and had a jones for exotic simplicity: the God of this was Elizabeth David, who made the Mediterranean Peasant her guru, and (in the end) helped revolutionise the foodhalls of the mid-range supermarket (= Postmodernism DO YOU SEE)

*In the UK this was arguably pioneered by cooking appliance corproations like the Gas Board and the Electricity Board, both of which put out regular manuals of HOW TO USE OUR SCARY MACHINE that were 90% recipes, 10% if you smell a leak don't look for it with a match)

(the AcMo vs PoMo dialectic posited above works to explode the way this FITE is generally elaborated btw, by the NoPoMo *and* the YoPoMo factions...)

mark s (mark s), Saturday, 21 September 2002 10:09 (twenty-three years ago)

*draws on zoot*

Wow.

suzy (suzy), Saturday, 21 September 2002 10:45 (twenty-three years ago)

Is cooking going to be your next major article, Mark?

Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Saturday, 21 September 2002 10:56 (twenty-three years ago)

holy historicizing, mark!

It's interesting that you correlate the move from looking good ==> tasting good with democratization. I think it depends on whose history is being told. There are perhaps different socio-economic arcs in cooking histories in the UK and the US. Whereas I would think the UK had easier exposure to French techniques, the average American was unfamiliar with French cooking styles until, as Nabisco correctly points out, a taste for Continental cookery was imported into the US by servicepeople returning from Europe after WWII, most notably, Julia Child.

Between the wars, US home entertaining was a bit hampered by Prohibition and then the Depression. Post-WWII cooking and entertaining in the US probably got wacky not only due to unprecedented prosperity resulting from the explosion in industrial production during the war, but also because of the advent of the television age.

A lot of the recipes from the 50's and 60's are designed to be compatible with television viewing, in that they are finger foods or easily served on TV-trays, and, from the Populuxe looks of them, perhaps even to compete with television (proto-MTVism). Television could of course give people an idea of how food should look, if not how it should taste. The wowee-spaceship aesthetic permeates American design of the era in general -- from automobile design to commercial architecture -- people were (relatively) prosperous and excited about life. It may look ugly and sound untasty to us now, but if it tasted (or looked) good to the people who made and consumed it, is that not democratization?

By the later 60's people were starting to calm down

felicity (felicity), Saturday, 21 September 2002 11:58 (twenty-three years ago)

martin: no, though i have decided that any theory of culture which fails to explain/explore cookery is w/o worth

felicity: yes, my story is v. UK-skewed and also ignores the rise of the fast-food industries (spiciness was democratised in the UK by the indian takeaway hurrah)

mark s (mark s), Saturday, 21 September 2002 12:17 (twenty-three years ago)

in e.david's (70s-published) book on spices she includes in the appendix the address of a place you can get chinese flavoring = one mini-supermarket in soho

today EVERY SPICE she mentions is cheaply available in any supermarket, posh or street, and many bigger cornershops, whatever their ethnicity

mark s (mark s), Saturday, 21 September 2002 12:20 (twenty-three years ago)

oh no -- Spice and the crysknife! is that why so many of you are so blue-eyed?

I find fascinating the idea of UK utility companies (if I'm understanding correctly) publishing cookbooks. We have many famous examples of recipes created by companies to promote their products (e.g., the Fluffernutter), but our utility companies are always nagging us to turn off the stove, the lights, the heat, the water, etc. , so the idea of them encouraging any life-activity is cute to me.

felicity (felicity), Saturday, 21 September 2002 12:43 (twenty-three years ago)

you are understanding correctly, felicity

mark s (mark s), Saturday, 21 September 2002 12:46 (twenty-three years ago)

haha now i am going to eat worms

mark s (mark s), Saturday, 21 September 2002 12:46 (twenty-three years ago)

Deep-fried?

Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 21 September 2002 13:09 (twenty-three years ago)

Fluffernutter? It's a great word, but I can't imagine what it could apply to. It'd be a good name for a squirrel in a children's book, but squirrels are rarely used as cooking appliances (with the obvious exceptions), so I'm guessing that's not it.

Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Saturday, 21 September 2002 13:28 (twenty-three years ago)

Fluffernutter = peanut butter and marshmallow fluff sandwich.

Fluffernutters!

(Squirrels are used in old editions of The Joy of Cooking!!!)

rosemary (rosemary), Saturday, 21 September 2002 13:56 (twenty-three years ago)

not deep-fried: sand-dried!!

mark s (mark s), Saturday, 21 September 2002 14:27 (twenty-three years ago)

Are squirrels used as appliances or ingredients, Rosemary?

Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Saturday, 21 September 2002 14:48 (twenty-three years ago)

Ingredients! There's a diagram on how to skin a squirrel!

rosemary (rosemary), Saturday, 21 September 2002 15:03 (twenty-three years ago)

Astounding, Mark!

Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 21 September 2002 15:13 (twenty-three years ago)

Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you ROCKIST FOODIES!

Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Saturday, 21 September 2002 15:44 (twenty-three years ago)

i have that edition of joy of cooking, there are chapters on all sorts of game

anthony easton (anthony), Saturday, 21 September 2002 15:55 (twenty-three years ago)

Cripes, Mike. Are those two afraid of anything French or something?

Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 21 September 2002 15:58 (twenty-three years ago)

ha "best American cook in Paris" --> "thank you for the back of your hand in my face"

in the famed tele-play "The Sopranos" Christopher's mom (GREBT actress) wants to make him a Fluffernutter but she hasn't kept peanut butter in the house since Chris left. "want French toast instead?" For her generation these are exotic above-and-beyond gestures, but Chris is too preoccupied to be grateful..... in France would probably be an insult.... "le pain perdu? mais je suis ton FILS!!"

Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Saturday, 21 September 2002 17:48 (twenty-three years ago)

If you like this, try... http://www.lileks.com/institute/gallery/index.html

Kim (Kim), Sunday, 22 September 2002 20:04 (twenty-three years ago)

haha, the Gallery of Regrettable Food has rosemary and donutbitch's name written all over it.

Frizzle my schnizzle indeed.

felicity (felicity), Monday, 23 September 2002 05:49 (twenty-three years ago)

found this weekend at Vicky's folks' house, an entire set of Margueritte Patten recipe cards, very much like the ones above, complete and in perfect order!! Reading them was grebt.

chris (chris), Monday, 23 September 2002 10:58 (twenty-three years ago)

Oh, I've known about that site for years! The best picture there is the one of a very disheveled Orson Welles.

rosemary (rosemary), Monday, 23 September 2002 15:19 (twenty-three years ago)

three months pass...
HAPPY NEW YEAR, BETTY CROCKER!

b c, Wednesday, 1 January 2003 00:08 (twenty-two years ago)

eleven months pass...
BETY CROCKOR IS THE TOTOL WHORROR!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAA

tu madres, Saturday, 27 December 2003 21:08 (twenty-one years ago)

Let me heave a dreamy sigh, and wonder aloud why can't all threads be like this?

Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Saturday, 27 December 2003 21:57 (twenty-one years ago)

I got a 1954 Betty Crocker cookbook for Christmas. I think I am going to have to pick up some cans of deviled ham and corned beef hash.

tokyo rosemary (rosemary), Saturday, 27 December 2003 22:00 (twenty-one years ago)

giblet hash!!

mark s (mark s), Saturday, 27 December 2003 22:02 (twenty-one years ago)

the old better homes & gardens cookbooks are great, too. lots of cringe-worthy dishes, but also really solid basic recipes.

lauren (laurenp), Saturday, 27 December 2003 23:09 (twenty-one years ago)

Best Threat EVAR, obv.
just count yrself lucky i don't have a scanner or it wld be 'The Complete Gelatin Cookbook' [(c) 1978] for you - appetizers include Eggs In Aspic, Ham And Eggs In Aspic, Devilled Eggs (in aspic), Pate in Aspic, & my favourite, Canapes In Aspic - which is really hardboiled eggs in aspic, only ON TOAST!

everything is decorated with sliced pimento olives, fancy-cut hardboiled eggs and SERVED IN LETTUCE-LEAF BOWLS - this is the hautest of cuisine.

petra jane (petra jane), Saturday, 27 December 2003 23:25 (twenty-one years ago)

I love this thread too. I swear I asked this on some other ancient thread, but I still don't remember what devilled ham is. But the idea of any process done to a food that results in it being termed "devilled" is pretty amusing.

Sean (Sean), Sunday, 28 December 2003 01:54 (twenty-one years ago)

devilled = hot & spicy. because everyone knows the Lord of Darkness likes his peanuts/ham/sausages/mashed hardboiled egg savouries with plenty of Tobasco kick.

petra jane (petra jane), Sunday, 28 December 2003 02:40 (twenty-one years ago)

mmmm no wonder I am so evil

Kim (Kim), Sunday, 28 December 2003 03:05 (twenty-one years ago)

i think deviled ham is mashed with mayo & paprika. mmm.

lauren (laurenp), Sunday, 28 December 2003 04:09 (twenty-one years ago)

BETY CROCKOR IS THE TOTOL WHORROR!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAA

This will be my New Year's battle cry. It's confirmed. Thank you GOOGLORSgooglers.

donut bitch (donut), Sunday, 28 December 2003 18:40 (twenty-one years ago)

two years pass...
The picture-free state of this thread makes me sad, Mr. Donut.

Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Sunday, 17 September 2006 18:00 (nineteen years ago)

I WANT PICTURES OF PLUR CUPCAKES!!!

Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Sunday, 17 September 2006 18:34 (nineteen years ago)

omg this fuckin thread

katie quirk (dubplatestyle), Sunday, 17 September 2006 18:38 (nineteen years ago)

ladies seafood thermidor sounds like a guided by voices song

katie quirk (dubplatestyle), Sunday, 17 September 2006 18:39 (nineteen years ago)

Sushi cupcakes, btw.

Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Sunday, 17 September 2006 18:45 (nineteen years ago)

Oh, OK, this will slake my Betty thirst for now.

Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Sunday, 17 September 2006 18:53 (nineteen years ago)

I still don't quite understand why American cuisine pre-195X was 90% about how the food looked or was shaped than how it, like, tasted.

Looking over the Betty Crocker site, I think I came up one really good reason: it's because American food in the wild didn't really photograph and print very well for a very long time (at least when printing processes appropriate to a cheap mass-market cookbook were involved). In my experience, both the high contrast black and white and "red shirt" color printing you find in '50's-'60's cookbooks often aren't subtle enough to accurately convey details in food. In black and white, the interiors of eggy, starchy, and cakey dishes have almost no detail at all; in early color, the exterior of cooked meat dishes often look like vast earth tone blots with a repulsive glisten. I'm guessing that to compensate, they were forced to feature food decorated with or forced into distinctive shapes just to give the cookbook reader's eye something to focus on and comprehend relatively easily.

Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Sunday, 17 September 2006 22:43 (nineteen years ago)

That seems logical. Certainly food photography was something of a horror right into the 80s, from my memory. I have a few Womens Weekly cookbooks from the early 80s that are hideous. Even though colour separation/priting was better by then, people still seemed to think food needed to be displayed with over the top decorations on everything: busy plates, busy loads of flowers in vases, piles of earthy seed bread all over the place. It all just reminded me of brown hand-knit jumpered hippy schoolteachers.

Trayce (trayce), Sunday, 17 September 2006 23:25 (nineteen years ago)


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