Lines uttered by Jeff Goldblum (as Dr. Ian Malcolm) in "Jurassic Park"

* Non-linear equations? Strange attractions? Dr. Sattler, I refuse to believe that YOU are not familiar with the concept of attraction.
* (seeing the dinosaurs) You did it. You crazy son of a bitch, you did it.
* (Grant remarks that he's out of a job.) Don't you mean "extinct"?
* What have they got in there, King Kong?
* How do you know they're all female? Does someone go into the park and, uh, pull up the dinosaurs' skirts?
* Life will not be contained. Life breaks free. It expands to new territories. It crashes through barriers. Painfully, maybe even.. dangerously, but and...well, there it is.
* (Grant asks if he's married) Occassionally. Yeah, I'm always on the lookout for a future ex-Mrs. Malcolm.
* What's so great about discovery? It's a violent, penetrative act that scars what it explores. What you call discovery I call the rape of the natural world.
* God creates dinosaurs. God destroys dinosaurs. God creates man. Man destroys God. Man creates dinosaurs. (Sattler: "Dinosaur eats man. Woman inherits the Earth.")
* God help us, we're in the hands of engineers.
* Now, eventually you do plan to have dinosaurs on your dinosaur tour, right? (taps camera, breathes on it) Hello?
* There, there see?! I'm right again. No one could have predicted Dr. Grant would suddenly, suddenly jump out of a moving vehicle! [..] Here I am now, by myself, talking to myself. That's...that's chaos theory.
* That is one big pile of shit.
* (Gennaro runs off to hide in an outhouse) When you gotta go, you gotta go.
* (The T-Rex is on a rampage) Boy, do I hate being right all the time.
* You stood on the shoulders of geniuses to accomplish something as fast as you could, and before you even knew what you had, you, uh, you patented it, and packaged it, and slapped it on a plastic lunchbox, and now (pounds on the table) you're selling it, you wanna sell it. Well...
* (Ian has been bitten by the T-Rex) Remind me to thank John for a lovely weekend.
* (After a car chase with the T-Rex) Think they'll have that on the tour?
* But, John. If the Pirates of the Caribbean breaks down, the pirates don't eat the tourists.

isn't there a "drive ... faster" line?

But I say: God creates dinosaurs. God destroys dinosaurs. God creates man. Man destroys God. Man creates dinosaurs. (Sattler: "Dinosaur eats man. Woman inherits the Earth.")

Ah shit, left out the "Must go faster. Must go faster." I ALWAYS forget at least one good line, AND an "other" option.

plastic lunchbox

* (Gennaro runs off to hide in an outhouse) When you gotta go, you gotta go.

classic

where's the part where's dropping the water on top of his hand and hoping to have sex with the one lady?

thought about it, decided it was more of a whole scene than a "line" as such.

I'm torn between "by myself, talking to myself" and "dinosaurs on your dinosaur tour."

yeah, guess you're right!

gotta say, though, "hold on to your buttz" beats all in jurassic park

haha, no argument on that one, although "But that's NOT...what I'm gonna do" is fucking amazing. Richard Attenborough's delivery is also amazing throughout.

amazing!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iBxgAmdPQWg

omg yes

haha that's brilliant. i wonder of the lawyer did much after?!

couldn't hear a word Jeff was saying in the Warrington Odeon on the week of release. never saw it again so never actually got to hear these words properly coming out of his mouth. may not have been the film's fault; said flea pit was a dump and pulled down that same year. i'm presuming the DVD/ Blu Ray are better mixed sound wise.

anyway, went with
But, John. If the Pirates of the Caribbean breaks down, the pirates don't eat the tourists.

oh er.. the clip with 'the lawyer story' is here;

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f_R81ZN2qn8

haha that's a great story!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AjZuzC7IQfY

http://www.hulu.com/watch/281927

SNL Celebrity Jeopardy - Sean Connery, Minnie Driver, Jeff Goldblum

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x2bCO6tr7Zw

Best delivery on: "You stood on the shoulders of geniuses to accomplish something as fast as you could, and before you even knew what you had, you, uh, you patented it, and packaged it, and slapped it on a plastic lunchbox, and now (pounds on the table) you're selling it, you wanna sell it. Well... "

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nqAMudS-QCU

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m7NEdbJ3ugE

xpost yeah, it's like this little teeny trace of the liberal outrage that fuels the character's whole shtick breaks free of said shtick, you sort of buy the guy a lot more after that.

That is one big pile of shit.

probably gonna vote for the lunchbox line. also fond of "anybody hear that? that's an... that's an impact tremor, is what that is. i'm fairly alarmed here."

i love this movie very much.

not a malcolm line but i think of "mr. hammond i think we're back in business" every time i fix anything. i think it's healthy to expect a velociraptor to jump at you as soon as you solve a major problem.

<3 the engineer line tbh

(seeing the dinosaurs) You did it. You crazy son of a bitch, you did it.

Love this one, it's so Planet of the Apes...

So many good lines in this movie though... I feel like there should be a bracket type poll of them.

Between "hold on to yer butts!" & "that's a clever girl!" & "this is a Unix machine... I can hack it," Jeff Goldblum doesn't quite own the quips in this film. His character might just be the most ridiculous though.

Actually, between "Clever girl!" and "They should all be destroyed!" I probably quote the game warden character more often than anybody else in the movie, really.

Game warden quotes are also v. choice cuts on the Jurassic Park pinball game.

* How do you know they're all female? Does someone go into the park and, uh, pull up the dinosaurs' skirts?

totally corny but the "uh" is very goldblum (or him doing woody allen)

That pinball game took a lot of my quarters back in the day, though my bar's table had an apparently common glitch where you can't actually access any of the subgames or whatever. Pretty sure "Hold on to your butts" features prominently.

This movie is getting a twentieth-anniversary release in 3D next year, which makes me feel like an age-old mosquito trapped in amber. Jesus God, where did the time go?

;_; its been 20 years?! I've wasted my life...

Your life will not be contained.

shit!!! I am asexually reproducing!! Damn you, chaos!

This movie is getting a twentieth-anniversary release in 3D next year

dunno about 3-D since often 3-D re-dos are shitty, but i'm excited to see this in the theater again! this was the first movie i remember being SUPER INTO, when it made it to the local cheap theater i went three times.

wtf at y'all of an age that rate this above moonwalker

air, jeff goldblum does not spend any time discussing defecation in that one

maybe if he'd reviewed it he would have

Automatic thread bump. This poll is closing tomorrow.

(taps camera, breathes on it) Hello?

a lot of these quotes read like inspirational image macros.

(The T-Rex is on a rampage) Boy, do I hate being right all the time.

~ Bob Marley

What's so great about discovery? It's a violent, penetrative act that scars what it explores. What you call discovery I call the rape of the natural world
- Bill Murray

i hate the sequels but The Lost World might have my favorite Ian Malcom line ("Oh, yeah. Oooh, ahhh, that's how it always starts. Then later there's running and screaming.")

Automatic thread bump. This poll's results are now in.

Boy, do I hate being right all the time.