worst movie on the IMDb top 250 list (#51-100)

we can have a "worst-off" a couple months down the road

American beauty ahead of amadeus

what is the intouchables tho

you'd think those stupid cunts would have la regle du jeu in their top hundred, at fucking least, or at LEAST ahead of amelie, which I want to vote for, having skimmed the list

I mean i voted american beauty no regrets, but i dont think i'll ever hate a movie like i hated amadeus before i turned it off and scratched the disc with my keys and fucked it to the far wall of the room

the rest of this list is p servicable

there's way less offensive shit this time around, weirdly

amelie the only one that raises my urge to never watch movies again, and even then I only saw it once, without subtitles, so PERHAPS HARSH

Amelie is delicious

The Prestige

I saw this film yet have no recollection other than it starred david bowie and was about magicians. No idea it was so popular.

I can't recall neither American Beauty or Amadeus, guess I liked them when I was 13 or something. I voted Braveheart, since I can remember watching a good chunk of it, and it's really bad.

Amelie is ok. The Prestige is the best Nolan.

I count 31 that I've seen. I won't vote, as I've avoided the ones I'd probably hate, but three I consider overrated are A Clockwork Orange, The Treasure of the Sierra Madre (only saw it once, mind you), and Unforgiven (ditto).

All three are great movies

The prestige has a hokiness that undercuts nolan nicely, but memento is always going to be his best movie

American Beauty is worse (way, way worse), but I never had people quoting it at me incessantly like they did with Monty Python and the Holy Grail. Love the Pythons, but kinda hate that movie for that reason.

oh come onnnnnn, as permaquoteds go it ain't exactly a bad'un

the weather was terrible the day i read shakespeare so shakespeare sucks

holy grail is probably in the top 3 funniest british comedy movies of all time, not, I stress, that this is a particular indication of quality, but still

withnail and I gets quoted all the bloody time here and it's really good too. when a funny one comes along, we're like wolves. rapacious, horrible wolves.

Ricky Fitts:

It was one of those days when it's a minute away from snowing and there's this electricity in the air, you can almost hear it. Right? And this bag was just dancing with me. Like a little kid begging me to play with it. For fifteen minutes. That's the day I realized that there was this entire life behind things, and this incredibly benevolent force that wanted me to know there was no reason to be afraid, ever. Video's a poor excuse, I know. But it helps me remember... I need to remember... Sometimes there's so much beauty in the world, I feel like I can't take it, and my heart is just going to cave in.

Withnail & i is, however, actually shit.

http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lu5y4tjysH1qbmshro1_500.gif

Toy story 3 can suck it

'withnail' quoting must be a british thing, i've only encountered like two people who've even heard of it.

voted for 'american beauty' without even thinking about it, i hate that movie so much more than anything in the top 50.

the sad thing about python quoting is that their material works so much better when you're not expecting any of it, so much of the humor comes from the 'surprise' value. (which might be a weird way of putting it, but it's not quite the same as 'shock value.') ppl have really run 'holy grail' into the ground, almost none of it seems that funny anymore. but when i was 13 it seemed like the most incredible, creative thing ever. that's probably why the show holds up so well -- ppl never quote like 90% of it, just the famous stuff.

The intense loathing for American Beauty by virtually everyone on ILX is interesting and somewhat baffling to me. Here's a short defense of the film I wrote for a countdown a couple of years ago. I don't think I've watched it again since I wrote that, but I'd seen it many times beforehand. Working my way through Six Feet Under earlier this year, I found that my favorite parts--a certain mood--were all sketched out in American Beauty.

to some (small) degree or another i like aspects of almost all of these except for requiem and green mile.

Srsly what is the intouchables

American Beauty is basically the movie that Fight Club haters think Fight Club is.

idk if that is otm but i like it

There's def a nolan thing there too

basically i just found everything about the film grating and unbearable -- the narration, spacey's smug performance, the depiction of bening's character as a screeching harpy, the daughter's completely unbelievable relationship with the creepy kid next door, the macho homophobe who turns out to be a closet case, and most of all the film's totally uncritical embrace of the idea that spacey's character is being genuinely rebellious by quitting his job, listening to more classic rock and treating his family like shit. i love lots of films with similar themes ('the ice storm' for one) but this one pretty much pushes all my filmhate buttons.

the poetry of a paper bag rolling in the wind

Bening's pillow talk with Wayle LaPierre.

*wayne

the intouchables is a pretty funny french movie

Waaaaaaaaay more awesome movies in this grouping than #1-50.

The contenders for the worst:

Life Is Beautiful (1997)
American Beauty (1999)
The Lives of Others (2006)
The Green Mile (1999)
Amélie (2001)
Reservoir Dogs (1992)
The Lion King (1994)
Braveheart (1995)

not a bad list but i have to say i like amelie and reservoir dogs but the latter definitely looks a bit more amateurish over time.

Don't get Withnail fandom at all. How do its fans justify the lol @ old gay guy stuff?

i'm genuinely torn b/w voting for green mile, braveheart or gladiator. each was obnoxiously daft in ways that even the other "bad" films on this list weren't (i.e., i don't think either amélie or american beauty are as awful as certain ILXors here do, but though they are overrated i didn't want to throw objects at the screen during either one of them).

eternal sunshine = utter shit

i guess the common denominator is "bro-love" -- neither of which amélie or american beauty really has.

never seen two lead characters in a "great" movie have less chemistry than that shit

the sad thing about python quoting is that their material works so much better when you're not expecting any of it

― (The Other) J.D. (J.D.), Tuesday, March 12, 2013 9:44 PM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

nobody expects the spanish inquisition

Lots of contenders here, but gotta go for Requiem for a Dream for being so pointlessly grim, and for wasting a lot of talent for a "drug are bad, mmmkay?" sermon. With movies like American Beauty or Gladiator, they weren't good either, but they were pretty much what I expected them to be, whereas RfaD had the potential to be something better, and failed.

ugh Braveheart

didnt have to read past #53

i've never watched Requiem but i've read enough Hubert Selby to wonder if the "message" is really "drugs are bad"?

The Green Mile is the movie whose presence is the most inexplicable here and that's what I'm voting for (but I haven't seen several of the movies on this list)

Easy target but Life Is Beautiful. Could be Green Mile or Braveheart if I'd ever been inspired to actually watch them.

Life is Beautiful over Cinema Paradisio, American Beauty, Green Mile

my fave here is a toss-up between "Vertigo" and "Singin' in the Rain"

top 5 for me would be M, clockwork orange, oldboy, holy grail, indiana jones

altho fuck it, res dogs could sub in there in place of M if im being honest

I'm not going to vote for it here, but I've tried watching Oldboy three different times now and have still never made it to the end without falling asleep.

Straight-up hate the Lion King though. There is no circle of life, it is a straight fucking line with birth at one end and oblivion at the other.

one of my college roomates was convinced that the background chanting in the song "Circle of Life" was Swahili for "make a baby"

but then you become the grass do u see xp

Cant f/w erics top ten, would switch vertigo out for green mile tho

LOL can't f/w it except to pull the all-time biggest f'ing/w it possible.

Moi?

Ok, ok, third man. Can someone pls remove djp's fp there pls

the FP shall grow and multiply, bringing forth new FP descendants, much like... the Circle of Life

don't give a shit if it's a 'magic negro' movie, i loved Green Mile. it's way better than anything in the increasingly tedious "kids movies the whole family can enjoy!" genre.

Also, Bridge over River Kwai is terrible, terrible, terrible.

v disapointed nobody ran with my '!

Fuckin phone.

disappointed nobody ran with my 'magic whitey' waltz django character view in that thread just sayin

not at all fond of 'the lion king' -- shitty soundtrack, oppressively new age-y 'circle of life' bullshit, and infuriatingly manipulative kid-traumatizing death scene. (at least walt had the decency to have bambi's mom die offscreen.)

'the lion king' is super-ponderous imo but also often dazzling to look at.

I really love the story of The Lion King, it's just super unfortunate that parts of it are conveyed by "Hakuna Matata" and "Can You Feel the Love Tonight"

return of the jedi

give me a million Ewoks over "The Green Mile"

you might not want a million ewoks according to this article i dug up.

Menace Mode

Once in a great while ( that .001% of the time ) the Ewok population will be placed under stresses that cause the Ewoks to transform. This is an evolved biological response to preserve the population. The cause of the stress can be natural (moonquake, flood, volcano, etc.), caused by the Ewoks (over-population, habitat destruction or war) or outside causes (meteors, aliens, etc.). The transformation cause the Ewoks to get bigger, a lot bigger! Normally they grow 10 to 12 times bigger that normal!! There are reports of growth of up to x15 in rare cases! They become rampaging terrors destroying anything in there path. After 2 to 4 months (during which time many normally dangerous animals are hunted, other Ewok tribes destroyed, aliens consumed, etc.) the stress drops and the Ewoks slowly (approx. 6 months) shrink back to normal size. A lone changed Ewok would be no match for King Kong or Godzilla however they normally travel in packs and either of those monsters would make a nice meal for a pack of giant Ewoks, so if your visiting there watch closely for any sign of trouble and be prepared to leave in a hurry. Why does nobody know about this? Any unfortunate intelligent beings visiting the moon at the time of a change or landing after a change are immediately killed and eaten. How do I know this you ask? I have found the diary of a Sith Lord by the name of Darth Sissious who lived a very long time ago. In this diary Lord Sissious visited this moon of Endor to scout it as a possible location for an evil lair. He arrived during a change and barely survived. After their transformation has been completed most menace mode ewoks deport to the Midland Trainstaion.

which also doubles as 'exhibit a' for the prosecution against 'return of the jedi'

ok thats amazing

lol "Menace Mode"

I would watch the shit out of a giant Ewok movie

"The Unfortunate Journeys of Darth Sissious"

http://images.wikia.com/starwars/images/d/d0/Endor_Holocaust.jpg

After their transformation has been completed most menace mode ewoks deport to the Midland Trainstation.

wait waht

you know, giant man-eating Ewoks is precisely the secret ingredient that "Hugo" was missing

In the Star Wars: Galaxies MMO, Ewoks were straight-up vicious little bastards.

http://www.theforce.net/swtc/holocaust.html

jesus christ this is a wormhole and a half

ROTJ is definitely much much worse than the first two movie but tbh the prequels make it look like 'lawrence of arabia.'

Acknowledgments
Thanks are due to, in alphabetic order:

Thomas M. Aldevio for questioning the different incidences of impacts on opposite faces of the Endor moon.
Andrew for suggesting use of the Death Star's sublight thrusters.
Robert Brown for discussion of political implications.
Elwyn Chow for typographical and grammatical corrections.
Rob Dalton for correction about the location of the Yucatan crater.
Chris Dion for pointing out the complications in reckoning the age of C-3PO.
Kevin Dole for pointing out the ewok enclave on Svivren.
Matthew Eppley gave a reminder about Emberlene and Caamas.
Jeff Erwin for pointing out that the rebel cause was the lesser of two evils, after the shield went down.
Martyn Griffiths for insisting that I consider radiation, grass, fires and chemical contamination; and for extended "devil's advocate" discussion.
Jon Horn for a reminder about the Ewoks in X-Wing: Solo Command.
Michael Allen Horne for suggestions for the statement of scope, in the introduction.
Robert Jones for raising the Toprawa example.
Lamtix for reminding me that the Death Star II might have been built out of substances other than metal.
Caleb Lawson for refinement of reasoning regarding use of survival gear in ewok resettlement.
Gordon Mitchell for the questions about non-metallic debris and hyperspace, answered in the FAQ section.
Sandy Petersen for biological corrections and background.
Shay Pierce for pointing out the kinematic issues surrounding the dark Force nexus at Endor; for drawing attention to the medium transports.
Ethan Platten for providing the novel references and challenging me to make them all mutually-consistent.
Wayne Poe for the rotation of the Death Star II.
Greg Wellman for originally drawing my attention to the orbital problem.

i don't know where any of these people are not but i'll just suspect it's 'so not gonna happen'

*now

these days I hate being the dude who shouts "poll!' but there are exceptions to every rule

also I feel like this might be SW code for bonin':

Sandy Petersen for biological corrections and background.

Green Mile is the worst of the ones I've seen.

I'm afraid I am a terrible Withnail quoter (and yep, Monty is meant to be much more sympathetic than, say, Withnail himself). AND I like Amelie.

― emil.y, Wednesday, March 13, 2013 10:16 AM (6 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

^^^^ m.eily the most sensible here lol

also, i missed "life is beautiful" on this poll -- never seen it and don't want to b/c of its ickyness.

surprised at all the Amadeus hate, a movie I find ridiculously fun

Also, Bridge over River Kwai is terrible, terrible, terrible.

no no no it isn't ... it's one of my all-time favorites in fact. but it IS kinda a 1950s 'bro film.

one thing I will say about Life is Beautiful is that is seemed very apparent to me that one of the things the movie really wanted to trade on was the ickyness of the premise and, as such, I had an easier time integrating that revulsion into the emotions I was expecting from the movie

Endor_Holocaust.jpg

surprised at all the Amadeus hate, a movie I find ridiculously fun

― his girlfriend was all 'ugh and he wears a solar backpack' (Shakey Mo Collier), Wednesday, March 13, 2013 4:43 PM (4 minutes ago) Bookmark

its just darragh who hates it and hes a r*t*rd

one thing I will say about Life is Beautiful is that is seemed very apparent to me that one of the things the movie really wanted to trade on was the ickyness of the premise and, as such, I had an easier time integrating that revulsion into the emotions I was expecting from the movie

tru dat ... but still, it IS basically the day the clown cried.

i'd give anything to know how Jerry Lewis reacted when he heard that life is beautiful was actually going to be released as a film (never mind also doing well financially and winning Oscars).

well... it's "The Day The Clown Cried" with a happy ending, which is probably why it got greenlit

xxx cankles

every now and then i google the day the clown cried to see if it has magically become available somewhere, and it never is, and it's a bummer

'the green mile' is a ridiculous offensive movie but also sort of gripping in its own sweaty aw-shucks america and jesus and redemption and hey, sadism and twisted vengeance bullshit way. scene w/the two dead girls is p fucked up in its imagery and OTTness.

i actually think i'll vote for 'gladiator' in the end; weak action scenes imho, a pretty uninspired villain, and it's boring much of the time. it never has any moments that are, to get simplistically film critic 101 for a moment, "rousing" or "red-blooded" or "passionate." 'braveheart' for all its drawbacks and the offensive bits has all of that shit. 'gladiator' is just dour.

82. 8.3 L.A. Confidential (1997) 262,586
83. 8.3 Chinatown (1974) 130,094

lol imo

85. 8.3 Oldboy (2003) 187,661

lots of 'interesting' shit happens but in retrospect this is a slog.

Requiem for a Dream

Is a dumb movie and its shitty and I voted for it cause I do not like it.

Ricky Fitts:

It was one of those days when it's a minute away from snowing and there's this electricity in the air, you can almost hear it. Right? And this bag was just dancing with me. Like a little kid begging me to play with it. For fifteen minutes. That's the day I realized that there was this entire life behind things, and this incredibly benevolent force that wanted me to know there was no reason to be afraid, ever. Video's a poor excuse, I know. But it helps me remember... I need to remember... Sometimes there's so much beauty in the world, I feel like I can't take it, and my heart is just going to cave in.

― christmas candy bar (al leong), Wednesday, March 13, 2013 12:55 AM (3 days ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Voted for AB, that quote made my eyes bleed. Also:

Lester Burnham: (narrating) I had always heard your entire life flashes in front of your eyes the second before you die. First of all, that one second isn't a second at all, it stretches on forever, like an ocean of time... For me, it was lying on my back at Boy Scout camp, watching falling stars... And yellow leaves, from the maple trees, that lined our street... Or my grandmother's hands, and the way her skin seemed like paper... And the first time I saw my cousin Tony's brand new Firebird... And Janie... And Janie... And... Carolyn. I guess I could be pretty pissed off about what happened to me... but it's hard to stay mad, when there's so much beauty in the world. Sometimes I feel like I'm seeing it all at once, and it's too much, my heart fills up like a balloon that's about to burst... And then I remember to relax, and stop trying to hold on to it, and then it flows through me like rain and I can't feel anything but gratitude for every single moment of my stupid little life... You have no idea what I'm talking about, I'm sure. But don't worry... you will someday.

Would be great if Lester Burnham died in a Takashi Miike film. Maybe with someone putting needles through his eyes.

Hate Resevoir Dogs. Why the Amadeus hate? Do people hate Amelie because it white washes Paris? I've never seen Requiem but I've heard about it. This pretty, white girl does drugs and she ends up falling so low that she sleeps with men, even a black man. That's what happens, right?

really bad: Life is Beautiful, Gladiator, Requiem FAD, Braveheart
subpar: American Beauty, Toy Story 3, Lives of Others, Amelie, Cinema Paradiso, Oldboy

haven't seen: Green Mile, Intouchables

voting braveheart

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