How does one procure a harem?

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A day or two before you plan to serve the harem, place in a very large saucepan cover with cool water and let stand 24 hours at room temperature, changing the water 3 to 4 times.

Drain, then place harem on a rack in the same saucepan, add cool water to cover, cover, and bring to a boil over high heat. Skim froth from surface, re-cover, adjust heat so water stays at a slow simmer and cook 25 to 30 minutes per pound or until fork tender and bone feels loose; cool harem in cooking liquid. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.

Lift harem from liquid, peel off rind, and trim fat to 1/2-inch. Score in a crisscross pattern and stud with cloves. Pat on a thick glaze (brown sugar and bread crumbs is the traditional glaze). Place harem glaze side up on a rack in a shallow roasting pan and bake, uncovered, 45 minutes or until glaze is nicely browned. Transfer harem to serving platter and let cool at least 20 minutes before serving.

Strangely arousing, yet entirely repulsive, Gazza. I appreciate that.

come and do english at goldsmiths!!

you have to be hairy, with a big moustache and one eyebrow.