sports and/or sport writing

it is essentially terrible. let's not even get into bleacher report.

i think grantland is actually really good, but can we agree that bill simmons is a shitty person? can we make that happen?

it's fucking hard coming up with an interesting take on the sports world again and again for weeks and years on end. inevitably, there is rank trolling and inexplicable terribleness.

(living in dc years ago i was able to witness michael wilbon's devolution into 'guy who mentions jordan no matter the context.' you should have seen his annual hockey columns.)

but that's no excuse for some shit.

rick fucking reilly stands athwart history yelling stop: [Removed Illegal Link].

the last two paragraphs, in particular, are priceless

oops http://es.pn/154hm4x

nfl writer notices that a head coach's brother died, writes this (courtesy j0rd):

When I noticed earlier today that the younger brother of Giants coach Tom Coughlin recently had died, I added the item to the list of stories to get posted at some point in the near future.

When I noticed tonight the circumstances, the story shot to the top of the stack.

i don't think bill simmons is actually a bad person. i think he is an ok person who i often disagree with.

i don't think bill simmons, maybe, is on purpose a bad person. and i don't care about the nba or boston, so i may be biased. but i found this pretty damning.

yeah i get that but i thought his take on girls and his podcast w/lena dunham were smart and perceptive and sympathetic. basically he's smarter, in an unschooled way, than the character he's occasionally portrayed himself as.

but to the thread's point, he's been a mostly good nba writer, a mostly bad everything else writer, and isn't one of the top 20 problems with sportswriting

i appreciate that he may have evolved, and like i said, i think grantland is largely very good.

and i totally appreciate the fact that he, more than really any other single person (weirdly), is responsible for the shift from 'beholden beat writers quoting truisms' to a view that a fan can actually relate to.

i also appreciate that he would never, for any number of valid reasons, have written rick reilly's column.

anyway, 'let us discuss the top 20 problems with sportswriting' is what i should have said in the op

the main problem with sportswriting is that most sportswriters aren't very bright.

or are they so bright they just blew your mind?

surely trolling/generating 'controversy' is a huge part of it

they're horrible at trolling though!

or i mean maybe they're ok at trolling the general population but who would want to be known for that

skip bayless?

espn? How ESPN Pulled A Bullshit Colin Kaepernick Story Out Of Thin Air

that espn thing was pretty fucked up.

skip is barely worth a comment.

top story on espn all day: Silent Mode: Lynch snubs SB reporters

this is basically the slowest week in sports iirc

It's awful. Close second: sports radio. I listened to sports radio during my 4 hour commute home today. I can't even believe how bad it is. Topic # 1 was Marshawn lynch at press say. Who gives a fuck?

Press day

LeBron on Cabrera deal: 'Wow'

this is a good read:
http://deadspin.com/the-top-200-ways-bleacher-report-screwed-me-over-1608499729

not to defend bleacher report, but that guy was a sucker

Agreed in both counts. Good article but the dude got taken to the cleaners.

Has anyone had a mightier fall than King Kaufman?

https://i.imgur.com/bcnyERE.jpg

I hope to god that was a joke.

nope, merely a hot take

stephen a. smith covering himself in glory today

nope, merely a hot take

― mookieproof, Wednesday, July 23, 2014 10:33 PM (2 days ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

That take was so hot im fucking sunburned. Piping hot.

stephen a. smith covering himself in glory today

― mookieproof, Friday, July 25, 2014 2:17 PM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Beadle absolutely nuked him on Twitter. http://awfulannouncing.com/2014/michelle-beadle-calls-out-first-take-for-ray-rice-segment.html

There is precedence in ESPN history for a suspension...........of Beadle. If i remember correctly, Simmons got put on the shelf for calling the Stephen A./Bayless show a piece of shit.

If that happens, i will never watch ESPN again.

I should say i only watch ESPN now when a sporting event is on. Nothing else, except maybe 30 for 30.

Funny, the last time I checked, you can't spell Jameis without "me" and "I."

espn suspended keith law from twitter because he defended evolution from curt schilling

i mean

lol

Well done, ESPN.

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/B7-9Q3bIMAAVRgv.png

sheman otm

SHERMAN

http://deadspin.com/how-jason-whitlock-is-poisoning-espns-black-grantland-1698683962

wau

dang

i feel like the inevitable revival of deflategate takes is gonna provide some quality mockery/hateread material for this thread

havent seen anything yet but it's gotta only be a matter of time. simmdog has to be typing fuckin furiously about this

http://deadspin.com/the-ballghazi-takes-are-back-and-they-are-more-insane-1702819519

i'm dying at this one:

During the investigation and answering questions from the media, Brady denied tampering with footballs or having any knowledge of those who did. However, he declined to make his text messages and emails available to NFL investigators.

Why, Tom?

Why?

You know why.

I know why.

The NFL knows why.

Because Brady cheated, that’s why.

Just like A-Rod.

Just like Barry Bonds.

Just like Lance Armstrong.

Another one of our nation’s most beloved sports heroes – a true Patriot – has flushed his integrity down the toilet.

Bye, bye, Mr. American Pie.

the "Why, Tom?" part is the killer

Tom "AP" Brady

http://i.imgur.com/ey3cI9g.png

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CEbc2npVAAA5kY4.jpg:medium

ugh slothrop, I shoulda recognized the Bye Bye Mr. American Pie one. that's our local columnist Mike Bianchi, who has been an embarrassment for as long as I can remember because he's held the post since I was a child.

I used to write him emails frequently to complain about his most recent horrible analogy, his penchant for hyperbole, or his reactionary writing style (as evidenced with the example above). He's famous mostly for hopping on whatever bandwagon issue crops up and taking a personal stand that often greatly exceeds the scope of whatever the transgression was to begin with.

fucking hate that guy.

the column he wrote the day after Earnhardt died was insufferable. He even had a special modified avatar of his face added to the column, which was usually adorned with his cheesy smiling face....only this time he used a deliberately concocted "sad" face instead. one that wouldn't have been believed in children's theatre, mind you.

i think Jemele Hill is the only person from our local paper who went on to have a solid career.

On Wednesday morning, the Ringer Union and the Writers Guild of America East learned that Spotify has purchased ​The Ringer. pic.twitter.com/dvNvpKnPMa

— Ringer Union (@RingerUnion) February 5, 2020

Oh great

Grant Wahl fired by Sports Illustrated

that 'internal memo' was really something

athletic laying of 8% of staff

oh man

i imagine the lack of shit to talk about has hit their bottom line p hard

17776 sequel y'all

https://www.sbnation.com/secret-base/21410129/20020/chapter-1

how is this even better than 17776

Here's the proper landing page

https://www.sbnation.com/secret-base/21410129/20020

Anyway, 7/12 in and this is basically the literary event of 2020

i keep putting it off because i don't feel ready but i will never be ready and should just start tonight

It's done. Unbelievably great

ESPN has announced that Dan Le Batard is leaving the company in January.

— Jimmy Traina (@JimmyTraina) December 3, 2020

i stg if he has a fuckin substack...

Simmons was on the show today so I'm putting 10 bucks on the ringah

maybe he's going to start his own wildly unsuccessful series of political punditry videos on youtube a la keith olbermann

such an asshole that i'm forced to side with the jets

https://www.washingtonpost.com/sports/2020/12/11/manish-mehta-jets-daily-news

huh

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/EsmQzkHXUAET4qD?format=png&name=small

okay lol at your framing of that clip

thank you for your service

One other layer...for future journalists...your first few years feel unpaid. I made 16.5k my first two years and worked harder than I’ve ever worked. There is a reason not everyone makes it in this business. I don’t have time for those of you who don’t understand grind ✌🏼 https://t.co/c4iWwPQ1bs

— Jane Slater (@SlaterNFL) March 1, 2021

journalists are the real troops

the thin cmyk line

happily her rich grandfather supported her as she built an important career breaking american football news #grind

This article on Team Hawaii from the 1970's era NASL is something else. Requires subscription, but I could probably be convinced to copy/paste it into a post…

https://theathletic.com/2488753

just so i have recorded this fact somewhere--the other day, the truehoop guy, who is still bitter that he no longer runs espn's nba coverage, tried to do some gotcha journalism on phoenix suns owner robert sarver by posting a video of sarver making some very off-color jokes at the memorial service of a deceased friend/business partner. hours later, that guy's widow contacted truehoop guy to let him know that it was intended to be a roast and that she thought it was hilarious.

lol at how hard espn dot com is pushing la liga right now

what percentage of its readership can name more than two teams or players

last couple years they've been doing that with serie A

It’s always wild when you think an artist has long since passed the peak of their career, and then they drop one of their biggest hits ever out of nowhere pic.twitter.com/lpfYhBRkDH

— actioncookbook (@actioncookbook) January 17, 2022

how do they keep doing it

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=alcVZZuj_WE

Presenting The 2022 Shams Charania Award For Excellence In Divulging Of Information Through Syntax Comprehended By Many

gold

I laughed so hard watching that video

https://www.nytimes.com/2022/12/30/movies/jon-bois-sb-nation-sports.html

xxxps ChatGPT may be approaching the Turing test but can it pass the Shams test?

As the poultry in question traversed the asphalt thoroughfare, one could not help but wonder at the avian's motivations for such a daring feat, according to sources close to the situation. Despite the inherent danger posed by the vehicular traffic hurtling past at high speeds, the chicken seemed undeterred, its determined gait and resolute demeanor a testament to its unwavering focus, league sources say.

As the chicken drew closer to the other side of the road, it became apparent that its destination was a grassy median, where it could perhaps peck at worms or bask in the sun's warm rays, according to an unnamed source. But alas, the journey was not to be an easy one, as the chicken was forced to navigate around various obstacles, including bits of debris, puddles of water, and even the occasional wayward leaf, as reported by multiple eyewitnesses.

Despite these challenges, the chicken remained undaunted, its resolve unwavering as it continued to make its way across the road, as confirmed by multiple sources close to the chicken. And eventually, after what must have seemed an eternity to the plucky fowl, it reached the safety of the median, where it could rest and enjoy the fruits of its labor, according to sources with knowledge of the situation.

So there you have it, a needlessly complex description of a chicken crossing the road, in the confusingly verbose and grammatically spotty style of Shams Charania, as reported by various sources.

did the ryder cup even happen if Stephen A. Smith failed to weigh in on it?

presumably too busy shitting on dak for only winning 38-3 on the road

shams was robbed imo

https://defector.com/presenting-the-2023-shamsy

these pull quotes are amazing

https://defector.com/pro-commanders-spin-somehow-a-bigger-mess-than-commanders

“competence, vision and sanity”

The magnifying glass on her is enormous, but the actual performances examined through the prism of reality have been the overall positive mixed bag almost any top rookie has early on in a pro sports career.

-- ESPN's Michael Voepel on Caitlin Clark

strong early contender for a shams

wow lol

just sitting around thinking about refraction

I came out of that sentence a changed person, but I can't exactly say how

can't argue with this result, but that ben standig/dianna russini article remains truly incredible

https://defector.com/presenting-the-2024-shamsy

who amongst us has not recently experienced fluid

unpaywalled: https://archive.is/1lmYu

Boston Celtics forward Jaylen Brown has decided to change up his look.

Brown took to social media to share photos of his most recent haircut, which saw a significant amount of change to his hair.

we have of course seen far worse butchering of the English language, but god I love the second half of that latter sentence

the haircut itself? not particularly significant. the change to his hair? nah. the AMOUNT of change to his hair, though, that's breaking news. we are into calculus here. i want to know how fast this haircut was: was the rate of change, or the rate of the changing amount of change, also significant?

so much (power) ranking

why are actual records/standings/seeds not enough

the top of the athletic right now is five separate stories on the tush push, including how this affects jalen hurts’ fantasy/gambling value