The New Monkees

In god's name, why did this exist.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0pUFWumxo7Q

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zQcsNDqcyuw

A fan page! On Angelfire.

http://www.angelfire.com/80s/newmonkees/

It contains this synopsis:

As eccentric rock n' rollers, NEW MONKEES live together in a large mansion. It's so large in fact, that they often get lost in it. This is no ordinary mansion; it is a fantasy world filled with countless rooms and hallways leading off into endless adventures. For members of rock n' roll bands, a fantasy existence is somewhat normal, but the NEW MONKEES' mansion takes their fantasies and extends them to the limit. Behind any door can be any environment imaginable: From the unusual (a gymnasium, a library, a bowling alley or roller rink), to the bizarre (a desert, a room with no gravity, or Lucy and Ricky Ricardo's living room). The boys can end up anywhere, without ever leaving the mansion.

The mansion comes complete with a butler named Manford (Gordon Oas-Heim). He has lived in the mansion long before NEW MONKEES moved in. He has been passed from tenant to tenant, always proving himself invaluable as the only person in the world who understands the mysteries of the house. Manford seems to have been in the mansion a few decades too long, however, and it's starting to show. He's become quirky. At times he talks to the house as if it were alive; other times he serves food nobody has asked for.

Most homes have a kitchen, NEW MONKEES' mansion has a 1950's style diner. Rita (Bess Motta) has been waiting tables in the diner for several years. No one is exactly sure when she got there, or where she came from. She is to the diner what Manford is to the house -- a permanent fixture. By nature an energetic, upbeat person, Rita is always there to cheer the guys up when they need it. Although she's got a quick wit and can spar with the best of them, Rita is a sympathetic ear, and a buddy.

Helen (voice by Lynnie Godfrey) was the most advanced "War Games" type computer in the U.S. arsenal until she had ethical problems working for the Defense Department and quit. Quitting meant one day secretly transferring all her data banks into another computer outside the Pentagon. The other computer happened to be in NEW MONKEES' mansion, and the Pentagon has been looking for her ever since. Living with a rock band and playing music excites Helen. She's found she prefers music to world destruction. Helen can also tap into other computers. She can imitate voices and tap into phone lines, predict the future based on her ability to compute vast amounts of information, and play music, calling up any sound, or group of sounds she wants; from a charging rhinoceros to a symphony orchestra, to wild electronic music. And, Helen can sing. But not in a lead singer way (she doesn't have quite the emotion for that). Helen "raps."

This is the wonderful, wacky world of NEW MONKEES. It's a show where you can expect only the unexpected. Anything can happen ... and usually does.

An interview with one of them from the other year:

http://www.roctober.com/roctober/newmonkees.html

I watched it. I bought the album. I was very young, so it's all the excuse I need.

Assume infinite C&Ps of this: And, Helen can sing. But not in a lead singer way (she doesn't have quite the emotion for that). Helen "raps."

OH BELIEVE ME I NOTICED.

Oh and here's the last episode, from an original (?) broadcast, on local TV, with commercials. It...wow.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cAJ64NAvigU

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_WavuMnSqXQ

...the New Monkees. WITH THE DEL RUBIO TRIPLETS.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ybw66oAHicc

the theme song is like a David Lee Roth video sans the crazy drugs that would make it fun

Oh dear that full length episode Ned posted is from a Cleveland station. (WOIO, which was an independent, then Cleveland's first FOX affiliate, and has been its CBS affiliate since 1994.)

NED WHY ARE YOU PROPAGATING THIS FILTH

The hateclicks of 1987.

T/S: The New Monkees vs. Pool It!

here's how bad The New Monkees were; they make Pool It! seem tolerable in comparison

that episode was truly terrible but not any more terrible than a dozen shows on network prime time schedules right now.

song in last video sounds like a really limp marshall crenshaw outtake.

wow i totally assumed this was a joke, but it's real. i'm speechless.

http://splitsider.com/2011/11/the-monkees-the-old-new-monkees-and-new-monkees-how-to-destroy-a-beloved-franchise/

I have no memory of this. No doubt that my mother being a huge old Monkees fan would never have allowed it in my house.

And it’s not like New Monkees’ music is really even technically rock music. If the Monkees (or the studio hired songwriters, rather) ripped off the Beatles, the most important and popular band of the ‘60s, then to New Monkees, the most important and popular band of the ‘80s was Mr. Mister, because that’s who New Monkees both sounded and looked like. The music, also prefabricated with an army of songwriters, producers, and studio musicians, is so vapid and unmemorable it makes Wang Chung sound like Bad Brains.

dying

TS:
http://www.entertainmentearth.com/images/AUTOIMAGES/RTMPC772lg.jpg
vs.
http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-eRYkJEGjK90/TxIIksmEKtI/AAAAAAAAAhI/YaC-Pkqy4P0/s400/New%2BMonkees%2Bkit.jpg

The extent of my experiences w/the New Monkees were the years of seeing the latter kit on toy store clearance racks.

I have no memory of this

Same here. I assume it never made it on to TV this side of the Atlantic.

The mansion comes complete with a butler named Manford (Gordon Oas-Heim)

Who was the star of Herschell Gordon Lewis' "Color Me Blood Red"!