The guy next to me is looking at porn

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I'm in the v.v.sleazy 24 hour computer room as my phone is fucked as per usual and I can't use t'internet at home. And yes, the guy next top me is shamelessly watching porn vidoes and flciking through sites and stuff, and I think he's wanking under the desk. What do I do?

― Graham (graham), Sunday, 6 October 2002 17:13 (twenty-three years ago)

look under the desk to make sure

― RJG (RJG), Sunday, 6 October 2002 17:16 (twenty-three years ago)

Then take pictures and post them on "Am I Wanking Or Not?"

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Sunday, 6 October 2002 17:17 (twenty-three years ago)

You could always join in.

― Gordon (Gordon), Sunday, 6 October 2002 17:18 (twenty-three years ago)

have some mood killer stuff on yr screen and turn it towards him

― boxcubed (boxcubed), Sunday, 6 October 2002 17:21 (twenty-three years ago)

Fix your phoneline.

― James Blount (James Blount), Sunday, 6 October 2002 17:33 (twenty-three years ago)

Good plan. What's good mood killer?

― Graham (graham), Sunday, 6 October 2002 17:34 (twenty-three years ago)

start up a noisy conversation with him about coffee or the weather or something

― Maria (Maria), Sunday, 6 October 2002 17:37 (twenty-three years ago)

"Do you have a pen I can borrow?"

(I don't have the guts to ask)

― Graham (graham), Sunday, 6 October 2002 17:39 (twenty-three years ago)

make a note of the computer, and make sure you never sit there!

― jel -- (jel), Sunday, 6 October 2002 17:42 (twenty-three years ago)

finish him off or move to a different computer

― kinski (kinski), Sunday, 6 October 2002 17:47 (twenty-three years ago)

Graham, this is the perfect opportunity to try my ILX "Faking It" idea about you being a pimp!

― nabisco (nabisco), Sunday, 6 October 2002 18:13 (twenty-three years ago)

mood kilr = rotten.com

― Dave M. (rotten03), Sunday, 6 October 2002 18:14 (twenty-three years ago)

though this could backfire horribly seeing as he is clearly a PERVY MENTALIST

― Dave M. (rotten03), Sunday, 6 October 2002 18:15 (twenty-three years ago)

Offer to hold his mouse.

― Billy Dods (Billy Dods), Sunday, 6 October 2002 18:23 (twenty-three years ago)

He went off to the toilets for an extended period. I resisted pulling the network cable from his computer or going through his bag or anything.

― Graham (graham), Sunday, 6 October 2002 19:16 (twenty-three years ago)

Hopefully he will come back and reveal himself as an ILx regular.

― bnw (bnw), Sunday, 6 October 2002 19:23 (twenty-three years ago)

Graham, take a fast wank on top of his keyboard and then run away, or dont and deny it: - IT WaS YOU, MaTE -

― vic (vicc13), Sunday, 6 October 2002 19:26 (twenty-three years ago)

Or you can scream in a frightening tone "The wank is coming FROM INSIDE THE COMPUTER!"

― donut bitch (donut), Sunday, 6 October 2002 23:22 (twenty-three years ago)

In this computer lab there's a chick wearing no bra, and were I trying to do work I'd be most upset by this distraction. Why don't more women not wear bras? I guess you need naturally-perky tits. What are the down points of not wearing a bra? Will your breasts eventually sag moreso than if you had worn one?

These are the questions of the universe.

― Andrew (enneff), Monday, 7 October 2002 02:24 (twenty-three years ago)

Some disgusting guy just stood next to me and dropped an absolutely atrocious fart. What a horrible way of punishing someone who is obviously wasting their precious computer time. Just for that I'm going to stay here for another half an hour.

― Andrew (enneff), Monday, 7 October 2002 02:30 (twenty-three years ago)

I'm trying to wank and some pale fellow with red hair is looking at me like a hawk. what to do. cheers - Ron

― freaky ron (tracerhand), Monday, 7 October 2002 06:15 (twenty-three years ago)

Right now in this university library, the guy next to me (who appears to be 12 years old), has spent the last 30 minutes seeing how many copies of teh Windows Calculator he can fit in the taskbar.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING? YOU HAVE THE WHOLE GOSH DARNED INTERNET AT HIGHSPEED FOR FREE. ????

Shall I point him at ILx?

― Graham (graham), Wednesday, 9 October 2002 14:21 (twenty-two years ago)

you really thinks he deserves it? wait til he fits 50 in, at least.

― g-kit (g-kit), Wednesday, 9 October 2002 14:25 (twenty-two years ago)

i'm crying with laughter at those last 2 posts ....

― Fuzzy (Fuzzy), Wednesday, 9 October 2002 14:29 (twenty-two years ago)

22 at the moment. But I think he's closing them. No ILx for you.

― Graham (graham), Wednesday, 9 October 2002 14:33 (twenty-two years ago)

and to think he'll never know how close he came...

― g-kit (g-kit), Wednesday, 9 October 2002 14:34 (twenty-two years ago)

Unlike the other guy.

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 9 October 2002 14:34 (twenty-two years ago)

Yuck. (hahahahah)

― Ronan (Ronan), Wednesday, 9 October 2002 14:36 (twenty-two years ago)

haha! now i'm cryin with laughter.

― g-kit (g-kit), Wednesday, 9 October 2002 14:37 (twenty-two years ago)

He's found the interweb at last.

Also, he has glasses and looks bitter.

― Graham (graham), Wednesday, 9 October 2002 14:38 (twenty-two years ago)

he would've fit right in.

― g-kit (g-kit), Wednesday, 9 October 2002 14:42 (twenty-two years ago)

Do you reckon he's posting about you?

― Ronan (Ronan), Wednesday, 9 October 2002 14:46 (twenty-two years ago)

No, he's loking at the O₂ website.

― Graham (graham), Wednesday, 9 October 2002 14:47 (twenty-two years ago)

he's just about to post "how many calculators can you fit in your task bar?"

― g-kit (g-kit), Wednesday, 9 October 2002 14:48 (twenty-two years ago)

Graham, stop looking at his screen. You're obv just as *interested* in the porn flicks as he is. ;-)

― nathalie (nathalie), Wednesday, 9 October 2002 14:57 (twenty-two years ago)

When I saw this had been revived I imagined that Graham was finding himself in the original situation again, and was ready to suggest that it mst be Graham who is overstimulating the man on the next machine.

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Wednesday, 9 October 2002 20:59 (twenty-two years ago)

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