do you use the paper toilet seat covers in public bathrooms

wait, they're not bibs?

no. I used to back in college when I felt that the general populace could not be trusted in their bathroom habits.

No.

only if the toilet is especially gnarly or i'm at an airport which is two ways of saying the same thing

no. But I wipe it down with tp before and after.

Automatic thread bump. This poll is closing tomorrow.

aka are you afraid of your butt touching places other butts have touched

just two thin pieces of cloth prevent this from happening all of the time.

i think i'm more afraid that my cat licks her butt, then licks my hand, and then i eat a doritos locos taco with cat butt molecules on it, or more than usual anyway

^ yes

i hate germophobes so much. how do they survive all the other times they get butt germs all over them?

why don't they go take some more antibiotics so we can all have more lethal diseases than we should

My roommate yelled at me for just rinsing a metal spoon w/o using the sponge + dish detergent

Sponges are gross btw

What can you even catch from a public toilet seat

no. I used to back in college when I felt that the general populace could not be trusted in their bathroom habits.

i don't use them either, but you were correct that people can't be trusted in their bathroom habits. no matter where i go, work bathroom, airport restroom, dive bar restroom, there is always piss everywhere

i take out my magnifying glass and inspect the seat. if needed, i break out the toilet paper and take direct action

no they're stupid

I do not use them for their intended use, however they DO make excellent blotting paper for oily faces like mine (props to Carl Agatha for an awesome protip)

the only time I've used them is in SUPER gross public restrooms where there's pee all over the seat & I sit on a stack of em

i don't use them, but from having worked retail w/public restroom i can tell you that there are some sick fuckin ppl out there

while we're talking about piss, WHY do toilets not have little mechanisms that let you step down on a little metal pad to raise/lower the seat, similar to some kitchen trash can models? wouldn't that be much more sanitary? i always wonder why some men apparently piss all over the place, and while i can't explain all of it, for situations where there's piss on top of the buttpad i'm guessing that some people don't want to lift up the seat because it's kind of nasty? and so, paradoxically, they do something even more nasty by pretending they're magicians who can piss standing up and not splash up onto the seat? an automatic footpad device to lift the seat might help out with that.

PSA that won't be news to 99% of you reading this, but since there are apparently a fair amount of ILX lurkers i feel like this is worth reiterating in case somehow you're a man and you don't understand this yet: you are NOT a magician who can piss standing up and not splash some up onto the seat. you're not. put the goddamn lid you fucking caveman

or better yet, attach a tube to your dick and put the other end below the water level so the piss flows silently and seamlessly into the toilet water like a civilized human being

and if you're squeamish about touching the lid use some toilet paper.

Better yet, submerge your dick inside the water when you pee xp

happens naturally tbh

pee when you're taking a bath like a goddamn adult

BELOW the water in case you didn't already figure that out sheesh

I didn't see my first paper toilet lid until college. It was like a serf's first experience with rose water.

while we're talking about piss, WHY do toilets not have little mechanisms that let you step down on a little metal pad to raise/lower the seat, similar to some kitchen trash can models? wouldn't that be much more sanitary? i always wonder why some men apparently piss all over the place, and while i can't explain all of it, for situations where there's piss on top of the buttpad i'm guessing that some people don't want to lift up the seat because it's kind of nasty? and so, paradoxically, they do something even more nasty by pretending they're magicians who can piss standing up and not splash up onto the seat? an automatic footpad device to lift the seat might help out with that.

― Karl Malone, Tuesday, May 13, 2014 9:50 PM (51 minutes ago)

it's so easy to just use your foot to lift the seat/flush, if you pee standing up with the toilet seat down you're seriously a worthless human being

Another line in the sand

i used to get angry about piss on the toilet seat, but then i realized that some flushes are so intense that toilet water will splash up onto the toilet.

also, the worst people are those who use a toilet as a trash can. if the paper does not have bodily substance on it, you'd better throw that fucker in the trash.

Sometimes the seat won't stay up

But rly this insistence that pissing into a toilet while standing is an impossibility is a challop of stridence and ought be mocked

Wait a second, you piss with the seat down, don't you?

there will be backsplash. if you don't know about backsplash, you must pee pee with your eyes closed.

no half measures for me, i piss with the seat AND lid down.

I'll piss wherever the fuck I want James

No I don't piss with the seat down I was raised like an animal but I've had girlfriends and some things sink in

You pee in your girlfriends sink?

If he wants james there

I sit down to pee. Facing in.

The tank makes for a convenient desk top / dining top

guys that is a South Park joke

I once saw maybe 30 soggy pretzels stacked on the back section of a public toilet.

the temptation to eat one was very small but surprisingly not zero. It was a primal temptation that needed to be quashed.

Leftovers from a robustly played game of soggy pretzel

Am I given to understand youse guys carry said paper coverlets around wth you in your handbags, or...? Cos its not like theyre actually included in the public bathrooms in question.

(only place ive ever seen such a thing in fact was in the old Japanese dept store in Melb, that had this weirdy automated rotating paper seat cover dispenser built into the toilet. Bless the germophobe japanese)

plenty of places have these things in the us.

I have never seen these things

Just pee sitting down. There is no anatomical reason for men to pee standing up. Just have a seat. Relax. Check your phone. Take your time.

(only place ive ever seen such a thing in fact was in the old Japanese dept store in Melb, that had this weirdy automated rotating paper seat cover dispenser built into the toilet. Bless the germophobe japanese)

― the Bronski Review (Trayce), Wednesday, May 14, 2014 5:32 AM (8 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

O'Hare Airport has this, but it's a rotating plastic seat cover dispenser. And some public bathrooms (nicer ones, generally, also I've seen them in office bathrooms) do have seat covers available in a dispenser on the wall.

To answer the primary question, I don't usually use them.

Some Japanese restaurants in my area have bidets built into the toilets that squirt water upwards, then blow heated air to dry off afterward. I'm told these are popular in Japan.

the prospect of a transhuman future is pretty frightening, but i'm pretty sure the whole part of being human that has to do with this thread will be one of the first things that the nanobots are instructed to take care of for us

piss on the toilet seat isn't nearly as gross as shit on the toilet seat

tired of people pooping with the seat down

I mean, at least you know what you're dealing with there. You're not all trying to figure out "is that piss or just an errant spray of toilet water from an exceptionally strong flushing mechanism". I see shit and I'm gone.

All the time.

Automatic thread bump. This poll's results are now in.

congratulations, everybody

we all got the syph.

damn, i never use a cover b/c i always assumed everybody else did. thought i was the only one putting my bare ass on the toilet.

whatever though, no time to change now

It would be too much of a shock for all the poor colonies of bacteria already thriving on your buttcheeks.

lol

i've learned a lot from this thread

am i not supposed to aim for the seat?

why would i want to ruin the water

is the water for drinking or for something else

U might swallow some during a swirly