Worst Eminem Lyrics 2010-2020

Window Pain is an all-time low, but that "booty heavy duty like diarrhea" is pretty much a Shaquille O'Neal lyric

somehow they missed "this type of pickle that we're in is hard to deal (dill)" (re: charlottesville, racism, trump) which is a serious contender

i can't stand this prick but i liked him when i was too young to know better and i can't help being fascinated by the absolute clusterfuck of tonal misfires that makes up almost all of his post-2004 work

God I knew clicking on this was going to make me feel worse. The “fillet is smoking weed” line is a contender, probably the most inane setup for an awful pun on the list.

"after you like the letter V" is at least a passable old-school wordplay line, the rest of these scan terribly even without listening to the songs. hard not to vote for "window pain" after hearing that song roughly twenty times a day at its chart peak, but man...

One of so many reasons I gave up on him.

As ILX's late-period Eminem apologist there's a lot I'm willing to overlook that Twitter's "ahahaha i used to like this guy be more like Gunna plz" commentariat likes to dunk on

That said, this is the absolute worst part of comeback Em

The things I hate most are what I call "reverse shaggy dog stories" where he goes through this long ramble of nonsense to finally land on one of these labored things like

When I found her it was love at first encounter
But, somehow she musta took the carton of eggs off the counter
Cracked them and placed all the shells on the ground for
Me to walk on when I'm around her

or

So I tied her arms and legs to the bed
Set up the camera and pissed twice on her
Look, two pees and a tripod

The pickle line is so bad, it's like a joke you'd find in a Bazooka Joe comic

uggghhhh forgot the tripod one. if the straightforward punchlines are Bazooka Joe, the underwhelming shaggy dog stories are like a Slylock Fox puzzle.

And it sucks extra hard because the line before it is absolutely brilliant!

I swear to God life is a dumb blonde white broad
With fake tits and a bad dye job
Who just spit in my fuckin' face and called me a fuckin' tightwad

Constantly swerving over the line between Dylan and Durst

"I'm so poker face, ladies going gaga" - Em or Fred?

The flowers of the city
Though breathlike,
Get deathlike at times
So you better get some beats and, uh
Get some better rhymes

his verse on EPMD 2 had some gems

Y'all should call yourselves Santa/'Cause none of y'all are real
Not a single one, Like a dollar bill
It's like your bitch in appellate court, she's on a pill

there was definitely a point where it seemed the things Em used to make effortless seemed to now take a fuck ton of effort.

the humor faded a bit from his music, even though it was still 'there', it wasn't as omnipresent and it seemed forced. whereas on the Slim Shady LP he had this free-form flow where he'd rap bonkers, borderline-absurdly hilarious-yet-equally self-deprecating shit line after line after line. Eminem Show felt like his transitioned to more of a po-faced style.

Here is a dumb verse that concludes in a soaring, generic pop chorus

just the sheer amount of technical effort expended on these dad jokes and piss/shit/fart references, it's almost heroically misguided

also the total whiplash between "i'm woke now" and "fuck you bitch", which doesn't even seem to be deliberate, he just doesn't see it

although that's a touch better than his earlier days where it was just "fuck you bitch" or "Fuck you f*****"

any grudging credit i might have given him for his bad attempts at social consciousness disappeared forever when i heard (trigger warning?)

"Grab you by the (Meow!), hope it's not a problem, in fact
About the only thing I agree on with Donald is that
So when I put this palm on your cat
Don't snap, it's supposed to get grabbed
Why do you think they call it a snatch?"

Wow.

probably his worst ever actually, not even bad in a funny way like some of these

If I didn’t know better I’d assume you were inventing parody Em lyrics but, again, I haven’t engaged with his music in a serious way in over a decade

so fuck him, he's cancelled, his music's terrible, etc - why do i still care? partly because his was the first music i really got into and partly because it's hard to see why he has to be this bad considering his skills, there are also interesting things he could rap about that he has shown occasional hints of but it seems like sustained self awareness is too painful for him so there's some kind of compulsive self-sabotage whenever things might start getting too real. which is much more relatable than i'd like it to be even when his issues and methods aren't

wow -- I like this look on you!

wait till you see how i fuck it up

good thread for it considering

Automatic thread bump. This poll is closing tomorrow.

That's an awfully hot coffee pot
Should I drop it on Donald Trump? Probably not

"It's because you worship D12's balls, you're sack-religious"

Automatic thread bump. This poll's results are now in.

forgot to vote for "rap bot", which imho is far worse than the rest, in that it doesnt even attempt a detectable joke(?), just literally pointless words, a shade away from just saying "this is a placeholder line in my rap song"