Concerts With Your Parents

Jon Caramanica, a critic I usually haaaaate, has a really nice piece in the Times about going to concerts with his late mother:

Because I got them quickly, our seats were in the center of the second or third row. There’s a thing that happens at a concert, especially in an arena, when you are seated right up front. The speakers are generally booming sound to the middle and back of the room, but up close, you can actually hear what’s happening onstage, and also what’s going on right around you. Which is why for most of that night’s show, I couldn’t really hear the roar of the crowd, but I could hear my mom yelling encouragement, loudly, at [Tina] Turner.

It was a pointillist way to experience a show — an almost literal call and response. My mom was in no way chill. Turner vamped, my mom hooted. Turner sang of brittle love, my mom pumped her fist in assent. I can’t quite tell you how the concert was, because for those two hours, I felt like I was eavesdropping on private communiqués.

Have you ever gone to a concert with a parent? What was it like?

I saw two concerts with my mom (who's still alive but mostly goes to classical things now):

- Neil Young & Crazy Horse/Sonic Youth/Social Distortion, 1991 (one of my aunts also came with us)
- Vicente Fernández, 2010

I also saw two concerts with my dad (who died in 2003):

- Dio/Accept, 1986 (my first concert; I was 14, so he insisted on accompanying me)
- James Brown, 1993 or 1994

My first concert - my parents took 10yo me and my 8yo sister to a Prince concert, in some Twin Cities suburb. It was the Lovesexy tour. He had a bed on stage and he had air sex on it. My sister got tired or overwhelmed or something and we left before the encore, as we were walking to the car I could hear Let's Go Crazy in the distance :( Incredible show.

I saw the Del McCoury Band with my dad in the late '90s. We also went to the International Bluegrass Music Awards show one year and saw a bunch of performances. I can't remember any others.

My 75-year-old mom just recently went and saw Harry Styles with my 38-year-old sister. I wish I could've gone!

My Dad took me to see my first concert, he consulted with my older cousins and had a choice of Motorhead, AC/DC or Mike Oldfield (all of whom I was into) so he opted for Mike, I can't blame him.

I was 8 years old and we were sat in the famed springy balcony of the Glasgow Apollo next to two hippies who were very stoned, the gig was great, amazing visuals, animated MC Esher style illustrations. Pierre Moerlen's Gong supported.

i took my dad to see the black keys at first avenue (when they were still a duo), it was way too loud for him, he couldn't handle it. he also is highly protective of his ears and has very bad hearing in general

i took my mom to see the david byrne american utopia thing, it was great, she got miffed that someone was smoking weed in the nosebleeds we were in

oh i also saw ralph stanley + co at this bluegrass fest in this weird hotel bar in my high school hometown. very strange vibes and ralph was so, so old. 'o death' still crushed everyone though

First concert ever was my parents taking me to Pete Seeger and Arlo Guthrie, at Northrup Auditorium in Minneapolis. Seeger didn’t make much of an impression, but Guthrie’s jokey style was just right for a kid.

Also saw Hugh Masakela and Miriam Makeba at the same venue, had no idea what the show would be, and loved it.

My Dad took me to see my first concert, he consulted with my older cousins and had a choice of Motorhead, AC/DC or Mike Oldfield (all of whom I was into) so he opted for Mike, I can't blame him.

Motorhead were an unbelievably, painfully loud live act, not sure yer da' would have appreciated them very much.

cilla black.
a very very long time ago.
and not really a concert, but a seaside show thing.
was a lot of fun.
i was a kid, and laughed a lot.

as for actual music concerts : none.
and thank f^ck for that.

My folks are baby boomers on the younger side, both into music throughout their lives (and still go to shows, at least when covid not a factor); so yes, I’ve definitely been to concerts with each of them and it doesn’t feel unusual or notable.

My mother chaperoned me to my first concert, Janet Jackson supporting the janet. album. I think she was uncomfortable with the how sexual the show was. My dad chaperoned my next real concert, REM supporting Monster. I think he had a great time. It was loud though.

my mom and i go to shows together all the time, it is our primary way of bonding. my dad would also attend but he hates crowds and standing for extended periods of time so we haven’t seen a show together in a long time. inadvertently as a music-obsessed kid i inflicted a lot of modern music on them and they took to a great deal of it so we have some good taste overlap, e.g. i’ve seen nine inch nails, smashing pumpkins, soundgarden with my mom. they could’ve remained oldies-loving boomers so i’m kinda thankful they let new stuff in

two slightly not-quite-right-for-the-thread (short) stories from me:

- my first concert ever was U2 on the Joshua Tree tour at age 11. i went with my mom's college roommate after she got stood up by her date. she called my mom because she knew i loved music.

- my buddies and i convinced our parents to let us drive 2+ hours to see Nirvana on the In Utero tour in the fall of 1993. (we were 17ish.) day of, a freak snow storm rolled in and made them all very nervous. i thought they were gonna kibosh the whole deal, but my friend Mark's dad Theo offered to drive us up so we could still attend. he not only drove up and sat at an Applebee's for a couple hours while we went to the show, he also lent me $100 for the night when i realized, upon arrival to the venue, that i'd left my wallet at home.

i am grateful to Theo to this day. pour one out for Theo tonight if you have a chance. (he passed away several years ago.)

My mom took me to my first concert in 1987, Huey Lewis and the News in Nacogdoches, TX. He started off the show by bringing out a drum machine and starting singing The Heart of Rock & Roll with just the drum machine then the band came in for the chorus. It was awesome!

Shortly before the pandemic started, I went to see the Rolling Stones with my mom, who's in her early 70s. It was a last-minute decision - I bought tickets the day of the show and talked her into going with.

My mom is a quiet, gently acerbic, very chill, contented-by-default sort of person; her signs of enjoying things are always a bit muted, and so it brings me great joy whenever she really gets into something and I see her smiling. She's not big into music in general and hadn't been to a show in a long time, but she likes the bands she grew up with, and she'd never been to a Stones concert before.

So it turned out that all the things about the show that I found a little disappointing and distancing - the beautifully polished roteness of the performances, the jukebox setlist - were perfect for her, because stuff like "Jumpin' Jack Flash" is the Rolling Stones she knows. I was wondering if she'd get tired, since we were out way past her bedtime, but she was standing up the whole time, doing a little shuffly dance with a huge smile on her face.

We had good seats, too - very central, near the b-stage. At one point the Stones came down to the b-stage and played "Sweet Virginia" acoustic, which pretty much made my night, so in the end I really liked the concert too, but honestly I would have been happy just watching my mom have fun. It was really cool to see it through her eyes - like, oh, maybe all this perfectly designed professionalism isn't really for me. It's for people like my mom, and it's exactly what they need from the Stones, and Jagger knows that and delivers.

i had a pretty similar experience seeing the stones with my mom a few years ago lily! like all the songs i expected them to play and my mom was loving it and i was like “this is cool” and then they played “midnight rambler” and i was like ohhhhhh fuck

my first two big arena concerts were with my family (mom + sister) and my best friend's family. i was probably between 9 and 11?

first one was new kids on the block in 1990 and second was garth brooks shortly after in the following years.

it was kind of a large group of us and i remember thinking, "she's having a lot more fun than me. is that allowed?"

My mother hauled a carload of us to see Kiss in Savannah in 1976. While we were trying to park, my little brother flipped off someone in another car and the guy rushed over to the driver's side ready to fight. He seemed confused when he saw Mom behind the wheel and we escaped to park somewhere else.

my mom is 89 and i think her concert-going days are probably over (mine might be too if this virus keeps up), but i've taken her to several david johansen shows over the years and she gets a kick out of him. she even knows fern, his #1 fan who is always seated front and center.

back decades ago mom & dad would go with us to the nassau community folk festival, stuff like that. saw the roches there and many others. when i was in elementary school my mom & i once walked to the westbury music fair to see bill cosby.

xxxxxp loved the Theo story, alpine static - what a legend

my dad was very good and patient taking a bunch of young teens to a couple of shows when i started seeing music - he sat in our van through debbie harry and the church, both in 1990, and drove everyone home afterwards

some decades later i took him to see Joan Baez cos he was really into her back in the 1960s, i probably spent the whole concert wondering if he was into it - i am a veteran concert-goer and he is very much not, and i was conscious that his criteria for a successful show would have been quite different from mine - but it was a cool thing to do and i think he enjoyed it!

You guys are so cool with your younger parents.

Only concert I went to with parents was Neil Diamond, 1976.

I fell on a floor grate outside my bedroom the night before and had a gash in my knee.

I still have the scar.

Theo not only saved the day and allowed me to see Nirvana live, he was significantly older than all our other friends' parents, including mine. When mine were 45ish, Theo was closer to 60. He was a classic loafers-and-black-socks-watering-the-suburban-lawn kind of dad.

Sorry to hijack, but I am just so thankful that he took us. For a long time, I thought he really put himself out that night. Now that I'm a dad, I understand that it was probably a very easy decision for him.

All of these stories--and Theo's especially--are really great!

when people ask me who my first concert was, I say Goldfrapp, because I was 16 and paid for it myself and took my pal and had a great time with no parental supervision. But it's not technically true.

My first was with my grandpa and it was Mary Black. I also went with my stepdad to see Gomez at the Barrowlands in the early noughties. Both were "someone has cancelled last minute and this ticket will go to waste" situations. Both were not for me.

I've got two pals who are brothers who've been to see The Cure, Radiohead and The Twilight Sad with their dad, all multiple times. They're not really that into the bands but they love how much joy it brings him so they keep doing it, and I think that's lovely.

Our first show: Miami Sound Machine, of course.

i attended a few small indoor folk music festivals with my mum in my early 20’s, and we saw a Chris Wilson concert together iirc - she loves music & is fun to see music with

dad loves music but doesnt really go to shows, i dont think i’ve been to any concerts with dad

these days mum and i have more and more similar taste in music as i grow to appreciate artists she loved when i was a kid & makes it a bit more sad that we are on separate continents that we can’t see shows togethe

I wish. My old man saw Hendrix (with Ike and Tina opening) at Cobo Hall in the 60s. He saw Pink Floyd on the Animals tour, Dylan at the Hard Rain concert, the Stones a bunch during their prime in the early to mid 70s. The Hendrix show was before my time, but he could have taken me to the rest. Sadly, he did not.

I’ve been to a few shows with either both my parents or just my dad (mom doesn’t go for anything too outré really): Richard Thompson, Dirty Three, Bill Callahan, King Crimson, Nels Cline, Sonic Youth, a Zappa tribute band LOL, probably some others I’m blanking on.

my mom isnt hip but shes one of those unflappable people who can have a pleasant time doing just about anything. there was a period of my life abt 15 years ago when if i couldnt find a pal to see a show with i would sometimes bring her, even if she didnt like the music she would always get a kick out of the experience. i remember taking her to see one of those yo la tengo 'sounds of science' shows and she absolutely flipped for it, thought it was the neatest thing she ever saw. she's too old for that stuff now, i'm really glad i did that stuff with her when i did, those are some nice memories.

My first two ever shows -- .38 Special/Night Ranger and Hall and Oates -- were with my dad in 1984. (My dad was not a fan of the former bill, but he very much enjoyed the latter.) Never have seen a show with my mom.

Hall & Oates with a parent sounds like a lot of fun!

My first concert was Bowie's '87 Glass Spider tour, mom, brother, sister, and two cousins came along. Even though it was in a huge stadium and the stage was so far away it was amazing. Ride to and fro was even better, in a bus full of Bowie fans, the chauffeur allowing live bootleg tapes they brought along to be played at loud volume.
The only other concert with parents was a Paolo Conte gig a year or two later, we also took my mom's parents along, who were in their 70's at the time - they loved it.

My mom is actually a Daryl Hall super-fan -- she keeps telling which episodes of his web series "Live at Daryl's House" I might enjoy -- so in 2017 I went to my first arena show in 20 years, and took her to the H&O / Tears for Fears double bill. Needless to say now I'm a Daryl Hall super-fan also.

my parents attempted to shape my music tastes early, and Chicago was the band that they tried to foist on me that I actually liked. my dad bought me a turn table in 1989, along with my first two records, the Oliver and Company soundtrack, and Chicago 19.

later that year, Chicago came to the Orlando Arena, and my folks bought tickets and took me, my first concert. they were angry because a dirty comedian opened the show, he was terrible but he told the joke "I bet that guy I'd pee all over this bar and you'd be happy about it". show blew my mind as a kid, I was so excited.

we wouldn't all go to another concert together until 2010, when we saw the "Beach Boys" (Mike Love, Bruce Johnston, and hired guns), which we all enjoyed.

Chicago came back, doing their entire Chicago II album a few years ago. Dad was not up to going (he was still able to take care of himself, drive, use the bathroom, feed himself, but he was starting to deteriorate by this point). Mom said it was the "best concert she ever went to" and started yelling at the posers she saw that were only there for REO Speedwagon that were leaving early, or fans that didn't know the old material.

it was pretty nice experiencing the same band with her 30+ years later

count basie with my dad i was too young to remember much of anything!

ha that reminds me that I took my kids to see The Necks at a young age - although they were old enough to sit through ut quietly (if somewhat mutinously) at least - I only did the first set and then bought them an ice cream as a reward!

a bit whimsical i guess but they’re the band I’m most grateful to have been able to regularly see live - and i thought 45 minutes wasn’t a big imposition and something they might appreciate later - and i guess i had a few formative musical (and i guess general art) experiences where i saw stuff that I didn’t understand - but just knowing there was stuff I didn’t understand really opened up my frame of reference and inspired curiosity

anyway it doesn’t seem to have done them any lasting damage

Count Basie with my dad when i was too young to remember much of anything we were both too old for Count Basie to still be alive.

He was probably 81 and I was 49. We switched favorites--I took him to see the Count Basie Orchestra at a New Jersey jazz club, and he took me to see "Classic Albums Live: Dark Side of the Moon" at a local college. Both shows were really good.

On the other end of life, in 1971 when I was 9 and dad worked for CBS TV in New York, the whole family went to the taping of "Julie Andrews and Carol Burnett at Lincoln Center." (Which I'm watching on YouTube right now.)

My mom took me to my first concert, which was Herbie Hancock, and I slept through most of it.

Not too long after, my parents took me to see Duran Duran on the Seven and the Ragged Tiger tour as a birthday gift. I was 9 and they were very much my favorite band at the time. They had not been to any kind of rock concert since the 60s (my mom saw The Beatles at Shea Stadium!), and they had zero sense of how insanely loud modern sound systems had become. My mom was extremely pregnant with my brother, and covered her belly with her coat because she was afraid he'd get brain damage in the womb (he's ok).

I went to a couple other concerts with my dad in my teen years, REM on the Green tour and Rush on the Roll the Bones tour, but he was mostly there as a chaperone.

More recently, I got tickets for my parents to the Boz Scaggs/Donald Fagan/Michael McDonald tour. Boz Scaggs has always been my mom's favorite.

Lol Neanderthal Chicago was my first concert as well. It was 84 or 85 in the St Paul Civic Center and yes a comedian was the opener. Weirdly there was no parent with us - the father of my friend Cam (RIP) dropped he and I off.

My dad (RIP) took me to three shows that come to mind. My first two Robyn Hitchcock shows were main room First Avenue gigs (not all ages 7th st entry) and my dad went to both so that my friend and I could get in. Element of Light and Globe of Frogs tours.

Around the same time, just he and I went to a triple bill of BB King, Albert King and Bobby ‘Blue’ Bland. Can’t remember the venue - somewhere in mpls. I’m not sure what the impetus was there - it wasn’t right in the wheelhouse of either of our tastes (him: cool jazz and baroque; me: American SST type shit and British arty type shit) but I remember it was great.

My mom and I have never gone to a show together except for some big band concerts with both parents at the pavilion which was across Como Lake from us.

I saw Ulver, which my mother knew beforehand, shortly after Kristoffer overcame his stage fright / performing reluctance. I felt like the coolest kid in that crowd.

best ILM thread in ages.
loving all these stories.

to flip it a bit, one of the best experiences i have had as a parent was at camp bestival.
Madness were headlining.
as they came on i turned to mk1 who was 21 at the time, and said : 'guess you are going to bugger off now to the dance tent'.
his response : 'dont be daft dad, i have grown up listening to you listening to Madness all my life, i cant wait'.
we both had a riot as the magnificent 7 rattled through their set.

best ILM thread in ages.
loving all these stories.

to flip it a bit, one of the best experiences i have had as a parent was at camp bestival.
Madness were headlining.
as they came on i turned to mk1 who was 21 at the time, and said : 'guess you are going to bugger off now to the dance tent'.
his response : 'dont be daft dad, i have grown up listening to you listening to Madness all my life, i cant wait'.
we both had a riot as the magnificent 7 rattled through their set.

ooops .. apologies for the double post.

wonder what Chicago's predilection with comedians was

they don't use them anymore. i wonder if one of them made jokes about their music

The biggest Chicago fan I know is a comedian (Jimmy Pardo)

Gone to many shows with my parents. My dad took me to my first "real" concert.

Dragged my entire family to Radiohead. Bad idea