Who is the largest dick in the music business?

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did someone do this already

― (doorag), Sunday, 8 December 2002 23:05 (twenty-two years ago)

2000 - Fred Durst
2001 - Andrew WanKer
2002 - TBA?

― DJ Martian (djmartian), Sunday, 8 December 2002 23:08 (twenty-two years ago)

I thought it was Tommy Lee. I thought it always was Tommy Lee.

― David R. (popshots75`), Sunday, 8 December 2002 23:50 (twenty-two years ago)

Micheal Jackson so far this year.

― scottstreat (scottstreat), Monday, 9 December 2002 00:00 (twenty-two years ago)

Mark Beaumont

― electric sound of jim (electricsound), Monday, 9 December 2002 00:38 (twenty-two years ago)

Sheryl Crow

― Jim M, Monday, 9 December 2002 01:05 (twenty-two years ago)

Bob Seger, strictly on the basis of "Old Time Rock 'n' Roll". Yes, that was released decades ago, but he built up a lot of dickularity with that one song.

― Nate Patrin (Nate Patrin), Monday, 9 December 2002 01:12 (twenty-two years ago)

Andrew WK may be a wanker, but a dick? He seems like a nice guy, if a little gooey with the new-age philosophies... I'd say Ryan Adams in 2001 and Eminem in 2002.

― Nick Mirov (nick), Monday, 9 December 2002 01:27 (twenty-two years ago)

you know, I completely misread the title of this thread.

Wow, you can go by year? Do they get bigger and bigger every year?

― Mike Taylor (mjt), Monday, 9 December 2002 02:38 (twenty-two years ago)

Okay, this is easy. Ben Affleck.

― maria b (maria b), Monday, 9 December 2002 03:32 (twenty-two years ago)

chuck berry was, now i don't know but i once saw the drummer from assuck push over a guy who had crutches. that was pretty dickish

― ddd, Monday, 9 December 2002 03:51 (twenty-two years ago)

Since when is Ben Asslick< /alt.showbiz.gossip> in the music biz? 2002 nomination: Ryan Adams.

― j.lu (j.lu), Monday, 9 December 2002 03:52 (twenty-two years ago)

W. Axl rose.

― Peter M, Monday, 9 December 2002 04:16 (twenty-two years ago)

I thought it was Tommy Lee. I thought it always was Tommy Lee.

actually i read somewhere that the guy from Pantera was bigger than Tommy

― Chupa-Cabras (vicc13), Monday, 9 December 2002 04:23 (twenty-two years ago)

The singer from Disturbed, only because of this...

My ex-girlfriend is a massage therapist. She worked at a concert at Rupp Arena here in Lexington, KY, on some metal bands that were playing, one of which was Disturbed. The other guys were apparently pretty nice and normal, Their singer, Baldy McMonkey Cough, he comes in and proceeds to announce himself thusly: "The singer for Disturbed is ready for his massage." And then, of course he's one of THOSE kind of dicks that assumes a massage therapist is responsible for other sorts of "acts" other than massaging, but I won't go into the details of that part, but basically...

That guy is a major league DICK.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Monday, 9 December 2002 15:02 (twenty-two years ago)

DDD: One doesn't expect the drummer from a group named ASSUCK to be nice and chraming.

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 9 December 2002 15:05 (twenty-two years ago)

Isn't Lexington full of major league dicks anyway? I mean, UK basketball and all...

― hstencil, Monday, 9 December 2002 15:06 (twenty-two years ago)

We have a WINER in Ryan Adams!
His award to be presented by Jack White at the MTV music awards.
Slapping sissy fight to start afterwards backstage.

― Mr Noodles (Mr Noodles), Monday, 9 December 2002 15:11 (twenty-two years ago)

Lexington certainly IS full of big time di....

Oh, you made a funny! LOL!

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Monday, 9 December 2002 15:21 (twenty-two years ago)

I didn't mean you, nickalicious.

But don't you get tired of the "Fire Tubby" whiners?

― hstencil, Monday, 9 December 2002 15:31 (twenty-two years ago)

Johnny Hip-Hop OWNS this thread:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/olmedia/1760000/images/_1760334_damon_150.jpg

― mark p (Mark P), Monday, 9 December 2002 16:52 (twenty-two years ago)

If you actually want to talk about unit size then some girl I met once told me that she was utterly terrified of Britt Daniel from Spoon's humongous cock.

― Chris Davis, Monday, 9 December 2002 18:16 (twenty-two years ago)

Either Ryan Adams......or that Irv Gotti character.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Monday, 9 December 2002 20:40 (twenty-two years ago)

Yngwie Malmsteen (and his unleashed fury) is now a front-runner.

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 9 December 2002 21:43 (twenty-two years ago)

SE-BITCHIAN BACH (skid row)

― chaki (chaki), Monday, 9 December 2002 21:52 (twenty-two years ago)

one month passes...

Biggest Dick? Sorry for all you rap lovers...but Snoop Dog ALL the way...boy thinks he a God.

― Kandy Reardon, Saturday, 1 February 2003 23:12 (twenty-two years ago)

Nah. Mike Love all the way, always has been, always will be.

― Chewshabadoo (Chewshabadoo), Monday, 3 February 2003 00:38 (twenty-two years ago)

Marky Mark.

― bobby j, Monday, 3 February 2003 03:02 (twenty-two years ago)

Mike Skinner

― Vic (Vic), Monday, 3 February 2003 03:35 (twenty-two years ago)

three weeks pass...

I would have to go with Eminem, Justin Timberlake, Britney Spears, Puff Daddy, and Jay Z just to name a few of the most irritating, annoying fucking people in the world

― Greg, Thursday, 27 February 2003 16:20 (twenty-two years ago)

http://www.pdxnet.net/talent/tom/meltzer.JPG

― Horace Mann (Horace Mann), Thursday, 27 February 2003 16:24 (twenty-two years ago)

eight months pass...

i do. ha ha.

― latebloomer (latebloomer), Tuesday, 18 November 2003 07:45 (twenty-one years ago)

elliot smith

― asfdzxc (asfdzxc), Tuesday, 18 November 2003 07:49 (twenty-one years ago)

Uh.

― jaymc (jaymc), Tuesday, 18 November 2003 07:49 (twenty-one years ago)

50 cent, no doubt about it

― Rudolf (Rudolf), Tuesday, 18 November 2003 15:30 (twenty-one years ago)

Everyone KNOWS it's Iggy Pop.

― Garibaldi, Tuesday, 18 November 2003 15:32 (twenty-one years ago)

dave gahan, surely

― Jay Kid (Jay K), Tuesday, 18 November 2003 15:34 (twenty-one years ago)

Garibaldi OTM

(oh, wait, I must have been mistaking "is" with "has" :-) )

― Geir Hongro (GeirHong), Tuesday, 18 November 2003 15:47 (twenty-one years ago)

http://webpages.charter.net/cmvenuti/images/lr.jpg

― Chris B. Sure (Chris V), Tuesday, 18 November 2003 15:57 (twenty-one years ago)

Noel Redding (RIP)

― mookieproof (mookieproof), Tuesday, 18 November 2003 16:20 (twenty-one years ago)

http://groups.msn.com/PsychedelicMusicFromTheAxisPowers/shoebox.msnw?action=ShowPhoto&PhotoID=414

― Will (will), Tuesday, 18 November 2003 17:19 (twenty-one years ago)

doe splastic count? then, that one guy in GWAR .

― kephm, Tuesday, 18 November 2003 17:21 (twenty-one years ago)

http://groups.msn.com/PsychedelicMusicFromTheAxisPowers/shoebox.msnw?action=ShowPhoto&PhotoID=414

― Will (will), Tuesday, 18 November 2003 17:25 (twenty-one years ago)

ahhh screw it.

― Will (will), Tuesday, 18 November 2003 17:25 (twenty-one years ago)

Woah mookie you're right Noel Redding and Jimi in the same band That must be the most well hung band evah

― Garibaldi, Tuesday, 18 November 2003 17:28 (twenty-one years ago)

N*** ******

― Lynskey (Lynskey), Tuesday, 18 November 2003 17:46 (twenty-one years ago)

Has = Huey Lewis

Is = Bret Michaels of Poison
Jamie Layne from Great White
Tommy Motolla

― tobig, Tuesday, 18 November 2003 17:49 (twenty-one years ago)

Every Sunday we have a Speakeasy (no liquor/beer sales on Sunday here in God's Country) and one of the drink specials is the Huey Lewis. Two cans of PBR served stacked. The Hendrix is three.

― andrew m. (andrewmorgan), Tuesday, 18 November 2003 17:52 (twenty-one years ago)

can you fill in a few more letters lynksey? I'm kind of puzzled.

― Pashmina (Pashmina), Tuesday, 18 November 2003 17:53 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm ashamed to admit that I once worked on the peripheral edges of the "music industry" (meaning low pay; nothing to brag about). Anyhow, I can tell you with complete confidence that the industry-wide consensus (from A&R personnel to concert promoters) pegs these three as the most notoriously fucked up egomaniac assholes the world has ever witnessed:

1. Paul Simon
2. David Crosby
3. Mike Love

― Kjoerup, Tuesday, 18 November 2003 17:56 (twenty-one years ago)

Pete Steel from Type O Negative has a notoriously huge wang.

― Jeanne Fury (Jeanne Fury), Tuesday, 18 November 2003 18:12 (twenty-one years ago)

Oh, and Eddie Van Halen - a real narcissist prick to the 100th power. How could I forget him on the list? They say that he's completely over the edge nowadays - delusional and psychotic, like Brian Wilson crazy.

David Lee Roth, though ... despite his reputation, he was one of the nicest and most courteous people I ever had to deal with - and that's no small claim in a business where almost everyone is a 100% insufferable asshole; Roth was the exact opposite of what I was expecting. (This was when he was in Van Halen.)

― Kjoerup, Tuesday, 18 November 2003 19:10 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.ronniejamesdio.com/Dio_Flame_Logo.gif

Actually he's probably not, I just wanted to post this...

― Gear! (Gear!), Tuesday, 18 November 2003 19:20 (twenty-one years ago)

Milton Berle?

― Dean Gulberry (deangulberry), Tuesday, 18 November 2003 19:22 (twenty-one years ago)

OH, "is."

― Dean Gulberry (deangulberry), Tuesday, 18 November 2003 19:22 (twenty-one years ago)

i've heard that Barry Manilow's a real prick. In the early 80's, for a while after lennon got shot, he really thought he'd be the next "rock star" to take a bullet. My marketing teacher is friends with the guy who did the sound for one of his tours back then and apparently he used to have bulletproof glass shields and stuff on stage with him, and one night at the end of the tour (the sound guy had already had his differences with Mr. Manilow, so he wasn't expecting to get rehired for the next tour) the sound guy snuck some samples of gunshots into the monitor mix and Barry hit the deck mid-song.

― Felcher (Felcher), Tuesday, 18 November 2003 19:34 (twenty-one years ago)

i've heard that Barry Manilow's a real prick. In the early 80's, for a while after lennon got shot, he really thought he'd be the next "rock star" to take a bullet.

You mean, he realised that people hated him that much? ;-)

― Geir Hongro (GeirHong), Tuesday, 18 November 2003 20:22 (twenty-one years ago)

Yeah, I forgot him too! Or wanted to put it out of my mind. I remember working a Manilow concert in the mid-80s (God, I was starting to really hate that job). The thing was, Barry M. refused to come out for soundcheck and then threatened to cancel the concert altogether. One of the road crew told me that Barry was holed up in his dressing room, awash in a powdery sea of white stuff and screaming that "the next Mark David Chapman could be lurking around any corner!" His road manager convinced him to finally come out.

The road crew had quite a few outrageous stories about B. Manilow. And crew and band alike were united in their hatred of him.

After the show, there was this gaggle of Manilow fans (mostly middle-aged housewives) who had won some sort of radio contest to "meet yer idol Barry!!!" But by that time Barry was back to his coke and paranoia, so he refused to appear. Instead they sent over a life-size cardboard cutout of the man himself. I watched the women (only minorly disappointed, it seemed) kiss and pose for photos with this cardboard likeness. Truly a surreal sight.

The roadie responsible for the cutouts told me that a lot of these women try to steal the thing. He confided to me that they had a couple hundred of them on hand and that he made good "tips" selling them off to the highest bidder - but (nod, wink) "don't tell anyone!" Hahaha.

― Kjoerup, Tuesday, 18 November 2003 20:28 (twenty-one years ago)

I would love to hear more about Eddie Van Halen's current madness or Paul Simon's antics if you'd like to share more.

Someone needs to make a movie about Manilow. A tragic comedy.

― Matthew Perpetua (Matthew Perpetua), Tuesday, 18 November 2003 20:48 (twenty-one years ago)

Allen Klein, anyone? His reach exceeds merely the music business - he fucks over the Rolling Stones while also raping Jodorowsky's films.

― Girolamo Savonarola, Tuesday, 18 November 2003 20:49 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm sure the Verve would agree with that one. Didn't he make it so that at least in terms of publishing, Jagger & Richards are the songwriters of "Bittersweet Symphony," and deny the Verve all mechanical and songwriting royalties for the song, as well as making it so that they can't put the song on a greatest hits record?

― Matthew Perpetua (Matthew Perpetua), Tuesday, 18 November 2003 20:54 (twenty-one years ago)

I know that Eddie Van Halen recently went over to the Limp Bizkit guy's house armed with an Uzi, in some attempt to get his equipment back. Rumor was that Eddie was crazy enough to audition for Limp Bizkit, but some say he was only working on demos as a "special guest" (more likely).

The Uzi part is true, though.

As for King Narcissist poster boy incarnate Paul Simon, he's just an insufferable prick, convinced that he stands hands and shoulders above Shakespeare, Julius Ceasar and Queen Elizabeth I combined - and expects to have his spotty fat little ass kissed accordingly. Atrocious excuse for a human being, that one.

― Kjoerup, Tuesday, 18 November 2003 21:00 (twenty-one years ago)

Should read "HEAD and shoulders above Shakespeare, Julius Ceasar and Queen Elizabeth I combined ...", but surmising that Simon's "problem" (aside from unwarranted adulation from a generation of tossers) undoubtedly stems from classic Napoleonic/short man/wee willy syndrome - yeah, let the dwarf wanker stew in his height-challenged purgatory. Hands and shoulders. Hee hee!

― Kjoerup, Tuesday, 18 November 2003 21:05 (twenty-one years ago)

Can you imagine Eddie Van Halen having to audition for a metal band?

"Okay, Mr. Van Halen, just plug into the amplifier over there and let's see what you can do."

― Mark (MarkR), Tuesday, 18 November 2003 21:07 (twenty-one years ago)

I've SEEN Paul Simon's willy and it's more than sufficient.

He's a considerate lover too.

― Garibaldi, Tuesday, 18 November 2003 21:14 (twenty-one years ago)

Wow! Art Garfunkel posts on ILM as "Garibaldi"!

― Kjoerup, Tuesday, 18 November 2003 21:16 (twenty-one years ago)

i coulda sworn it was ms. brickell

― Felcher (Felcher), Tuesday, 18 November 2003 21:17 (twenty-one years ago)

I mean satisfiying, but a bit of a one-trick pony, y'know?

― Garibaldi, Tuesday, 18 November 2003 21:23 (twenty-one years ago)

The best thing that Paul Simon ever did was appear in Annie Hall as the sleaze bag producer guy.

― Jeanne Fury (Jeanne Fury), Tuesday, 18 November 2003 21:24 (twenty-one years ago)

the trick being when he sticks his willy in?

― oops (Oops), Tuesday, 18 November 2003 21:25 (twenty-one years ago)

Yes, he was great in Annie Hall, what a sleaze bucket.

― scott m (mcd), Tuesday, 18 November 2003 21:45 (twenty-one years ago)

I've heard that Mellencamp is a real nightmare to deal with.

As for Disturbed, I was just reading something - I wish I could remember where - but they were interviewing a band - I think it was in the new issue of Spin actually! - and the band they were speaking to remarked that Disturbed were the biggest dicks they had ever met.

and every photographer seems to have a story about Mos Def. Major prick, confirmed by no less than three friends who have shot him professionally.

― roger adultery (roger adultery), Wednesday, 19 November 2003 00:30 (twenty-one years ago)

Steve Albini

― Mr. Snrub (Mr. Snrub), Wednesday, 19 November 2003 01:33 (twenty-one years ago)

No steve is just really honest, and funny.

― Nihilist Pop Star (mjt), Wednesday, 19 November 2003 02:47 (twenty-one years ago)

Well, and mean and childish. But funny.

― Kenan Hebert (kenan), Wednesday, 19 November 2003 03:22 (twenty-one years ago)

Whoever mentioned Michael Jackson probably must be one of ILx's younger readers. :-)

― Geir Hongro (GeirHong), Wednesday, 19 November 2003 03:58 (twenty-one years ago)

the best thing that paul simon ever did was write dozens of totally awesome songs

― colin mcelligatt, Wednesday, 19 November 2003 05:35 (twenty-one years ago)

confirmed by no less than three friends who have shot him professionally.

"Yeah, he was a dick, so I plugged him. But the money was good."

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 19 November 2003 06:35 (twenty-one years ago)

'We're doing this for your own good, Mos.'

― Momus (Momus), Wednesday, 19 November 2003 11:31 (twenty-one years ago)

(Oh, you mean they were your friends!)

― Momus (Momus), Wednesday, 19 November 2003 11:33 (twenty-one years ago)

Mark Beaumont introduced himself to me at a gig once by coming up and saying "Hi, I'm Mark. I'm a Melody Maker writer. This is my fiancee, Rachel". He was wearing sunglasses indoors, which happened to be a cavernous basement in Islington, in the middle of winter.

He gets my vote...

― Kate Jane Connolly (fixitgirl), Wednesday, 19 November 2003 12:51 (twenty-one years ago)

five years pass...

"Killing Joke and the Butthole Surfers will never play ATP again, and they can both suck my balls. And you can put that in print. The Black Lips will never play again—they're assholes. They broke into a chalet and started stealing stuff."

good to know

http://www.villagevoice.com/2009-09-01/music/an-oral-history-of-all-tomorrow-s-parties/2

― Zeno, Tuesday, 8 September 2009 02:36 (sixteen years ago)

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