If Jeff Buckley had gills...

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― Nordicskillz (Nordicskillz), Thursday, 3 April 2003 12:55 (twenty-two years ago)

He would no longer have the soothing voice of a choirboy.

― Nordicskillz (Nordicskillz), Thursday, 3 April 2003 12:56 (twenty-two years ago)

best thread evah!

― SplendidMullet (iamamonkey), Thursday, 3 April 2003 12:56 (twenty-two years ago)

Look out, man.....M.Guibert is ALWAYS watching. Don't find out the hard way.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Thursday, 3 April 2003 13:01 (twenty-two years ago)

he'd have died a lot earlier due to not being able to breathe properly

― Dave Stelfox, Thursday, 3 April 2003 13:02 (twenty-two years ago)

If Kirstie MacColl had a stunt ramp for a face . . .

― Lynskey (Lynskey), Thursday, 3 April 2003 13:02 (twenty-two years ago)

If Marvin Gaye had only got his own place...

― Nordicskillz (Nordicskillz), Thursday, 3 April 2003 13:05 (twenty-two years ago)

If Marc Bolan had an airbag...

― Dave Stelfox, Thursday, 3 April 2003 13:06 (twenty-two years ago)

If only heroin had vitamins in it instead of deadly, evil poison...

― Nordicskillz (Nordicskillz), Thursday, 3 April 2003 13:08 (twenty-two years ago)

if J'Joplin, J'Bonham, K'Moon, EtBlahBlahCetera's 'd been teetotallers...?

― t\'\'t (t\'\'t), Thursday, 3 April 2003 13:14 (twenty-two years ago)

If Mama Cass had ordered the soup . . . .

― Lynskey (Lynskey), Thursday, 3 April 2003 13:46 (twenty-two years ago)

If only Buddy Holly, Ritchie Valens and the Big Bopper decided to take a nice, leisurely drive ...

― Bruce Urquhart (Bruce Urquhart), Thursday, 3 April 2003 14:10 (twenty-two years ago)

If Charlie Parker was a gunslinger...

― Colin Meeder (Mert), Thursday, 3 April 2003 14:13 (twenty-two years ago)

If Freddie Mercury had wrapped his monkey...

― My name is Kenny (My name is Kenny), Thursday, 3 April 2003 14:28 (twenty-two years ago)

If Mama Cass was vegetarian...

― kate, Thursday, 3 April 2003 14:30 (twenty-two years ago)

If Ian Curtis had been watching a Judy Garland/Mickey Rooney musical instead...

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 3 April 2003 14:35 (twenty-two years ago)

Beat you to it, Kate!

― Lynskey (Lynskey), Thursday, 3 April 2003 14:39 (twenty-two years ago)

The conflunce of rhymes back there inspired me....

If Kirsty MacColl had a stunt-ramp face
If Marvin Gaye had only got his own place
If Buddy Holly wouldn't fly
If Mama Cass had hated pie

If the Bolans took a cab
If Elvis simply lost the flab
If Morrison had quit at dope
If Ian Curtis had no rope

Had Les Harvey hated playing live
Had Vince Neil said, "Let Razzle drive"
Had Keith Moon only taken Tums
If Cobian lacked opposable thumbs

(Or if, perhaps, he'd never wed)
If Marley had a better head
If Sam Cooke stayed with friends instead
Then none of them would now be dead.

― TMFTML (TMFTML), Thursday, 3 April 2003 16:01 (twenty-two years ago)

If East Coast looked up to the West
And West Coast thought the East was best
And gangstas never fired shots
would Pac & Big live? They would not.

For Pac would sip on Alize
Until his liver went away
And as for East Coast martyr Big
He'd die from eating like a pig.

― EC, Thursday, 3 April 2003 16:25 (twenty-two years ago)

Shit. I've been pronouncing it "A-leez" all this time.

― TMFTML (TMFTML), Thursday, 3 April 2003 16:27 (twenty-two years ago)

Jeff Buckley:
Voice of an angel
Swimming Skills of an anvil

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Thursday, 3 April 2003 16:48 (twenty-two years ago)

Starr! Ooh, good god y'all! What is he good for? (Pushin' up the daisies!)

― Neudonym, Thursday, 3 April 2003 17:09 (twenty-two years ago)

Ouch. Too soon.

― Nick A. (Nick A.), Thursday, 3 April 2003 17:27 (twenty-two years ago)

If Mama Cass had shared her sandwich with Karen Carpenter...

― My name is Kenny (My name is Kenny), Thursday, 3 April 2003 17:29 (twenty-two years ago)

If Johnny Ace said, "Nah man, let's just shoot craps instead..."

― Charles McCain (Charles McCain), Thursday, 3 April 2003 18:15 (twenty-two years ago)

...there'd be a lot of dead copycats. Er.

― Jordan (Jordan), Friday, 4 April 2003 05:09 (twenty-two years ago)

TMFTML, that was incredible.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Friday, 4 April 2003 06:10 (twenty-two years ago)

Yeah, great poem TMFTML (TMFTML: The middle finger talks much louder ?)

― kevin brady (groeuvre), Friday, 4 April 2003 06:55 (twenty-two years ago)

The Middle Finger... I may just have to change the name of the website.

Thanks for the thumbs up. It's always been my ambition to be the Ogden Nash of ILM.

― TMFTML (TMFTML), Friday, 4 April 2003 12:09 (twenty-two years ago)

Consider yourself Ogden. Brilliant stuff.

― Lynskey (Lynskey), Friday, 4 April 2003 12:49 (twenty-two years ago)

If Bon Scott would've passed out on his stomach...

― christoff (christoff), Friday, 4 April 2003 14:12 (twenty-two years ago)

If Ian Curtis had been watching a Judy Garland/Mickey Rooney musical instead...
He woulda SHOT himself instead of hanging himself.

― Lord Custos Epsilon (Lord Custos Epsilon), Friday, 4 April 2003 14:38 (twenty-two years ago)

With an Uzi. Brains everywhere.

― Lynskey (Lynskey), Friday, 4 April 2003 14:50 (twenty-two years ago)

Yeaaaah. Straight Up! Empty a clipful of black rhinos into his dome, and then change clips.

― Lord Custos Epsilon (Lord Custos Epsilon), Friday, 4 April 2003 14:56 (twenty-two years ago)

one year passes...

ROFL

― brokem twig, Friday, 16 July 2004 21:13 (twenty years ago)

Effing great thread. Why did it di- I mean end so soon

― Thea (Thea), Friday, 16 July 2004 21:28 (twenty years ago)

naive question: who is Brian Jones? And how did he die?

― Gilles Meloche (Gilles Meloche), Friday, 16 July 2004 21:31 (twenty years ago)

He was hit by a train. See below:

Hello!
You’ve arrived at the Brian Jones (Model Engineer) web site. Please feel free to explore, and email any suggestions you may have.
At present the site carries information about Gauge One and G scale models, radio control, and other electronic control systems. And now..... there’s the new FX-4U digital sound unit too!

Brian Jones (Model Engineer)
Dept NT., Raithby by Spilsby Lincolnshire PE23 4DS UK
Phone/Fax: 01 790 752042
International: +441 790 752042

Brian Jones Online! http://www.brianjones.free-online.co.uk/

― Thea (Thea), Friday, 16 July 2004 21:36 (twenty years ago)

x-post
Naive Answer-
Brian Jones: Rolling Stones guitarist/multi-instrumentalist drowned in swimming pool?

― AaronHz (AaronHz), Friday, 16 July 2004 21:37 (twenty years ago)

drat. sorry - i thought this was the "I Love Tiny Trains" message-board.

― Thea (Thea), Friday, 16 July 2004 21:40 (twenty years ago)

Fun Fact: The night Elliott Smith supposedly stabbed himself in the chest, I stayed up late watching a Warren Beatty/Jean Seberg film called Lilith. In the film, Peter Fonda's character kills himself by-yes, stabbing himself in the chest. Coincidence? I think there's a chance Elliott may have been watching the same flick, seeing as how that's such a weird way to go...

― AaronHz (AaronHz), Friday, 16 July 2004 21:43 (twenty years ago)

1951 Fonda survived a near-fatal gunshot wound while horsing around with an antique .22 pistol nine months after his mother's suicide; years later the experience found its way into the Beatles song "She Said She Said". While taking LSD with members of the Fab Four, Fonda told George Harrison that he knew what it's like to be dead, prompting John Lennon to ask, "What do you mean, you know what it's like to be dead?" and later write the song."

― Thea (Thea), Friday, 16 July 2004 22:00 (twenty years ago)

i'm sorry but brian jones is alive and playing in rtx:

― frankE (frankE), Friday, 16 July 2004 22:01 (twenty years ago)

why don't images work anymore??

http://dragcity.com/bands/rtx4.jpg

― frankE (frankE), Friday, 16 July 2004 22:01 (twenty years ago)

Gee I didn't know Pete Yorn was on Drag City

― Thea (Thea), Friday, 16 July 2004 22:04 (twenty years ago)

If Bo Diddley were a gunslinger...

http://img.epinions.com/images/opti/7b/f6/96973-resized200.jpg

― amateur!st (amateurist), Friday, 16 July 2004 22:48 (twenty years ago)

three years pass...

Jeff Buckley:
Voice of an angel
Swimming Skills of an anvil

Even today, this comment slays me. Thank you Alex in NYC.

― stephen, Monday, 11 February 2008 11:16 (seventeen years ago)

Mama Cass didn't suffocate on a sandwich, it's an urban legend.

― Tuomas, Monday, 11 February 2008 11:49 (seventeen years ago)

did you read that on the internet

― electricsound, Monday, 11 February 2008 11:52 (seventeen years ago)

you know what they say, print the sandwich

― latebloomer, Monday, 11 February 2008 11:52 (seventeen years ago)

http://www.snopes.com/music/artists/mamacass.asp

― Tuomas, Monday, 11 February 2008 11:53 (seventeen years ago)

see, google searching isn't so hard tuomas

― electricsound, Monday, 11 February 2008 11:54 (seventeen years ago)

I knew it because years ago I had a bet on this with my flatmate, and I printed out the Snopes page to prove her I was right.

― Tuomas, Monday, 11 February 2008 12:02 (seventeen years ago)

all's well that ends well

― electricsound, Monday, 11 February 2008 12:04 (seventeen years ago)

Gosh, that's really sad about her.

― Bimble, Monday, 11 February 2008 14:25 (seventeen years ago)

If only Kurdt had a rifle with a pop-out sign that said "BANG!"

― Mark G, Monday, 11 February 2008 15:19 (seventeen years ago)

five months pass...

Jeff Buckley:
Voice of an angel
Swimming Skills of an anvil
-- Alex in NYC (vassifer), Thursday, April 3, 2003 10:48 AM (5 years ago) Bookmark Link

fucking win

― stephen, Sunday, 3 August 2008 04:19 (sixteen years ago)

. . . Chris Martin would have no career?

― If Timi Yuro would be still alive, most other singers could shut up, Sunday, 3 August 2008 09:06 (sixteen years ago)

you know what they say, print the sandwich

-- latebloomer, Monday, February 11, 2008 11:52 AM (5 months ago) Bookmark Link

― BIG HOOS aka the steendriver, Sunday, 3 August 2008 17:49 (sixteen years ago)

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