"Turn it up"

I'm playing w/this band, right, and we do pretty much regular gigs, one a week, in pubs & bars. We have been doing pretty well, in that we usually get a re-booking, and people like us and stuff. For the past 6 months or so, thee onstage volume has been creeping up until it has reached thee point we are at now, where it's ridiculous. We are playing pubs and bars, and if it keeps on going up, the drummer will need monitors for his drums. If I play a gig on, say saturday, my ears are still ringing the next friday night, hey! just in time for the damage to be replenished by the next gig. Last night, we played at this bar where we've played before several times. This time, the reaction we got was rather muted. Because we were too fukcing loud. I was sitting on stage, playing fukcing carry on wayward son, and it was like the jesus and mary chain's version!! The 2 guitarists both have 100w marshall stacks. the bassist (poss the main cause of this problem) has 2 big bass amps on stage, an ashdown and a trace elliot. Sitting next to him is like sitting next to a earthquake. He plays like Chris Squire, but has a volume and tone and general "prescence" in the mix like some bloody jamaican dub plate, which would be great if we were playing that, and not "yours is no disgrace". The drummer has to play full on all night to keep up w/this. I have this amp, and a couple of wedge monitors. 'till recently, I used one wedge for my monitoring, and one so the rest of the band could hear some keyboards, but last night, I had both wedges pointing at me, and still I could barely hear myself. It's fukcing ridiculous. The vocals are suffering, and they now sound like a football terrace chorus. IE not appropriate to the material really. After the gig I was really pissed off, & moaned a bit. The bassists response was s.th. like "Well, we're a rock band" and also "I saw the ac/dc tribute band here, and they were louder than us", like because we, a prog rock covers band, are (probably barely)quieter that T3H FUKC!NG AC/DC TRIBUTE B4ND!!!@#!@#!@# then that's ok, anmd we're not too loud? Oh man, for fukc's sake....(to be continued 'coz we're playing tonight as well)