What kind of record should Ozzy make to end his career? (Inspired by recent television appearance.)OZZY OSBOURNE: "Die Fledermaus" or "Die, Bat!"
1. "I Leak In Your Chimney," a diatribe
over Osbourne's being put in manacles at the Alamo for
public urination set to menacing riff. ZZ Top-esque
lyric: "How could those coppers be so unkind
to arrest me for pissing while blind."
2. "I Love You (So I Stove In Your Eye)" Much TV-retold
tale of Osbourne's attacks on his wife while
out of his mind on illicit drugs and strong drink.
3. Die Fledermaus -- a 30-minute rock operetta
(a) "Tastes Like Pigeon" Sings about the unwarranted
hysteria which followed the biting the head off a dove.
(b) "Die, Bat!" Song about the unreasonable hype following
the biting off of the head of a dead bat onstage.
(c) "Tasted Like Pigeon (Slight Return)"
(d) "Killing Injection" Headbanging song about the
three-week series of abdominal inoculations one must
undergo when potentially exposed to rabies.
4. "The Runes" -- Song damaged by serial bleeping of the vocal.
5. "Old Yellow Stains" -- Self-mocking number about how Osbourne,
during a long jet flight with Bon Jovi to a concert in
Moscow, released his water into his trousers because
the line to the airplane bathroom was too long.
6. "Slip and Fall"
7. "Iron Man with the Shaky Hand"
8. "Mushmouth Shouting" (cover song)
― George Smith, Thursday, 21 August 2003 20:59 (twenty-two years ago)
Seriously, although it would never happen, I'd love to hear him collaborate with some Scandinavian black metal musicians. However, now that he sings at ballgames he's probably turned the corner permanently towards evolving into Meat Loaf.
― Nom De Plume (Nom De Plume), Thursday, 21 August 2003 21:28 (twenty-two years ago)
...evolving into Meat Loaf.Physically, that seems to be out of the question. Musically, he's more or less there already...
P'haps he should just cover the entirety of The Beatles' White Album, the great fan that he is.
Though covers wise, the thought of Ozzy doing Imagine as his swan song, from start to finish - complete with "O Sharon" and everything - delights me even more.
― t\'\'t (t\'\'t), Thursday, 21 August 2003 21:48 (twenty-two years ago)
He could do a bang-up version of "I Don't Wanna Be A Soldier Mama, I Don't Wanna Die" -- it's right in his range, about the tempo he can handle, and Zakk Wylde could play the riff from "Sweet Leaf" over it.
My god, I hope no one contemplates doing that as a mash-up.
― Nom De Plume (Nom De Plume), Thursday, 21 August 2003 21:52 (twenty-two years ago)