Offbeat music

I invented this new kind of music. I call it "Offbeat" because you know when the rhythm goes "boom ba-CHUCK-ah boom ba-CHUCK-ah boom ba-CHUCK-ah" and you hear it and you start dancing? But there's the bits in between where the drummer isn't playing, you know. You NEED that in the music, because otherwise, all the beats would go at the same time, right? You can't dance to that! It sounds like it would if you dropped your TV set! All the music just goes "BLP" and it's over. That's the whole record, my friend, just kiss your fifteen dollars or whatever down the toilet. You can't dance to that sound! And so what you do is, you take all the parts with the drums and the guitars and you take them and you just separate it all out and you put it back together, and so what you have, see, what you HAVE, is the song, but just THE PART THAT MAKES YOU DANCE. But you don't even hear it. Because there isn't any drums and there isn't any guitars. You don't NEED that in the music. Why do people get up on stage and do that? Why do they do that? I'll tell you why. They do it for ATTENTION. They don't want you to hear other people's music. But with MY kind of music, see, it just comes on the radio, you know? You look and see if it's working, because the light is on, but you can't hear anything coming out of it. You just start dancing. You can't even help it because this shit is CATCHY. It's like LASER BEAMS coming out of your speakers, and you don't even know what hit you! It's like you never heard anything like it before, and that's right! I'll tell you right now! Sometimes, if you have two radios on, you'll have one that's on a regular station, and you think you're listening to "Piano Man", but what you don't realize is that MY music is the music that is making you dance because it goes IN BETWEEN that other music! It goes AROUND the molecules! You can't download this kind of music because it goes in between the computer molecules too. I have figured out how I'm going to do this with those pedals and shit that you use, like when I go "Ya" and it goes "Ya ya ya ya ya ya" but then I make it so that it just sounds like I'm going "Ya" but then you press "record" on the radio and I don't say anything.