Hey, lets anticipate the lyrics to Cliff Richard's "Santa's List" christmas single...

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I havent heared the thing yet, so lets try to guess/interpret/f.around with the format....

Don't be too rude (at least not until the tenth post or so.) Try to make it rhyme occasionally...

"Oh the girls and the boys with their lists for their toys
Santa brings them on his sleigh...
But if I could see a way
for some things on christmas day
this is what I'd say........"

1) A kind thought or two for me and for you...

over to youse...

― mark grout (mark grout), Tuesday, 11 November 2003 09:44 (twenty-one years ago)

I'd rather shovel bees down my...

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Tuesday, 11 November 2003 10:12 (twenty-one years ago)

trousers?

― mark grout (mark grout), Tuesday, 11 November 2003 10:16 (twenty-one years ago)

Wrong thread Mark

― Stewart Osborne (Stewart Osborne), Tuesday, 11 November 2003 10:17 (twenty-one years ago)

OK, how about:

"A kind thought or two for me and for you...

Some sanctimonious proselytising too..."

Who's next?

― Stewart Osborne (Stewart Osborne), Tuesday, 11 November 2003 10:21 (twenty-one years ago)

"Some emotional blackmail 'bout the Baby J
And a new Massed Genocide video game
A DVD of the Babylonian Whore
This will be my Christmas gift to you...."

― Stewart Osborne (Stewart Osborne), Tuesday, 11 November 2003 10:25 (twenty-one years ago)

Sorry that should have been ".... to you all".

Otherwise it doesn't rhyme and that wouldn't be at all festive, would it?

― Stewart Osborne (Stewart Osborne), Tuesday, 11 November 2003 10:27 (twenty-one years ago)

I hope there's a lyric about Prince Charles. Maybe "the Prince was in his buggering house / buggerings boys for money"?

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Tuesday, 11 November 2003 10:28 (twenty-one years ago)

OK, verse two...

"A day full of merry christmas snow"

― mark grout (mark grout), Tuesday, 11 November 2003 10:28 (twenty-one years ago)

"A buggered servant full of Columbian blow..."

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Tuesday, 11 November 2003 10:31 (twenty-one years ago)

"A church that helps conceal paedophiles
But won't have homosexuals in it's aisles..."

― Stewart Osborne (Stewart Osborne), Tuesday, 11 November 2003 11:08 (twenty-one years ago)

"Woo hoo Santa's list
It's really great
Yeah Yeah Yeah
I'm a fucking teabag"

― Lynskey (Lynskey), Tuesday, 11 November 2003 12:05 (twenty-one years ago)

Lynskey wins!

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Tuesday, 11 November 2003 12:24 (twenty-one years ago)

You guys all forget we are speaking of Cliff friggin' Richard here. You don't think he'd ever write a Christmas song without at least reminding the listener slightly of "the reasons why we celebrate Christmas".

― Geir Hongro (GeirHong), Tuesday, 11 November 2003 16:18 (twenty-one years ago)

booze?

― Jarlr'mai (jarlrmai), Tuesday, 11 November 2003 16:24 (twenty-one years ago)

"You guys all forget we are speaking of Cliff friggin' Richard here. You don't think he'd ever write a Christmas song without at least reminding the listener slightly of "the reasons why we celebrate Christmas""

On the contrary I'm extremely conscious that Cliff seems to be pathologically incapable of just allowing us all to enjoy the spirit of Christmas© (Registered Trade Mark - Hallmark Cards Inc.) without having to keep dragging bloody religion into it.

― Stewart Osborne (Stewart Osborne), Tuesday, 11 November 2003 16:33 (twenty-one years ago)

Christmas time
Mistletoe and wine
Children singing
Christian rhyme and wine
with logs on the fire and wine
and wine on the trees
a time to rejoice in the wine that we seeee - ah.

― mark grout (mark grout), Tuesday, 11 November 2003 16:54 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm just anticipating how Sir Cliff is going to rhyme "Santa's List" with "Jesus Christ", cos I sure as hell can't see him rhyming it with "let's get pissed", "rubber fist" or indeed, "anal cyst".

― NickB (NickB), Tuesday, 11 November 2003 16:58 (twenty-one years ago)

Jesus Crist?

― mark grout (mark grout), Tuesday, 11 November 2003 16:58 (twenty-one years ago)

"CHRIST! Aaaaaaah! He'll save everyone one of us!"

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Tuesday, 11 November 2003 17:00 (twenty-one years ago)

or he'll die trying...

― mark grout (mark grout), Tuesday, 11 November 2003 17:05 (twenty-one years ago)

Yessss. Post of the day. I'm really pleased I said that....

― mark grout (mark grout), Tuesday, 11 November 2003 17:05 (twenty-one years ago)

"Christ-i-an w(h)ine" would be a better way of writing that, I think :).

the choirboy who sang the outro to Cliff's 1988 Xmas #1 (which was, perhaps, a marginally superior option to Bros' "Silent Night") was on some "80s Christmas" BBC pop-nostalgia show last year. he has *exactly* the voice you'd imagine of an ex-choirboy - ie clear as a bell with no hint of Estuarisation whatsoever, something increasingly rare in a twentysomething, but still nowhere near as much of a museum piece as the very idea of this single is.

"If you aren't on Santa's List / See a psychoanalysist / On Christmas night all Christians sing / blame the heathens for everything ..."

― robin carmody (robin carmody), Tuesday, 11 November 2003 17:08 (twenty-one years ago)

That's the winner.

― mark grout (mark grout), Tuesday, 11 November 2003 17:10 (twenty-one years ago)

thanks!

actually Cliff might have realised that most people just get pissed at Christmas because his next Xmas #1, "Saviour's Day", faded out with the call to "raise all your glasses and drink to the King". the sixth word alone might have been more resonant for most.

subthread: doesn't the Archbishop of Canterbury's liking for the Incredible String Band prove once and for all that Cliff's sanctimonious dribble is far from the most "godly" form of pop music, if you want to bring those criteria into it?

― robin carmody (robin carmody), Tuesday, 11 November 2003 17:12 (twenty-one years ago)

esp. considering that "The Hangman's Beautiful Daughter" charted simultaneously with the Second World War anthem (well, Cliff sang it at the VE Day commemorations in 1995, a classic example of faked history) "Congratulations".

― robin carmody (robin carmody), Tuesday, 11 November 2003 17:14 (twenty-one years ago)

San-ta's list,
San-ta's list,
Santa's Santa's Listy List...

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Tuesday, 11 November 2003 20:39 (twenty-one years ago)

he has *exactly* the voice you'd imagine of an ex-choirboy

You mean, he sounds like Art Garfunkel? :-)

― Geir Hongro (GeirHong), Tuesday, 11 November 2003 21:06 (twenty-one years ago)

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