Ten Word Album Reviews...

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Why fill reviews with masses of waffle and overuse of adjectives such as "majestic", "dylanesque", "anthemic" etc. when you can sum it up in 10 words? Examples... New Order: Get Ready. "It sounds like New Order. Which isn't a bad thing." The Strokes: Is This It. "Skinny New York white boys playing pop music with guitars."

Your turn...

― Debs, Sunday, 16 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

The Charlatans' Wonderland -- Tim Burgess sucks helium and gets away with it.

Stereolab's Sound Dust -- the High Llamas have rarely sounded better.

Jay-Z's The Blueprint -- "Get out of my way. Kiss my feet. I'm god."

― Ned Raggett, Sunday, 16 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

The Dears' "The End of a Hollywood Bedtime Story" - Black Damon Albarn smoothly sings strangely poignant nocturnal love songs.

Sorry I can't get rid of overblown epithets...

― Simon, Sunday, 16 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

shit sandwich ;)

― Derek Smalls, Sunday, 16 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

PJ Harvey's latest album in ten words: Patti Smith Patti Smith Patti Smith Patti Smith Patti Smith.

― Dickon Edwards, Sunday, 16 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Ah, but here's the challenge, Dickon -- how would you sum up On Earth to Make the Numbers Up in ten words or less? ;-)

― Ned Raggett, Monday, 17 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Dickon Edwards Dickon Edwards Dickon Edwards Dickon Edwards Dickon Edwards.

― Dickon Edwards, Monday, 17 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

PJ Harvey :

Eurydices almost lost in Manhattan , finds Orpheous , returns.

― anthony, Monday, 17 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Ripping off Charlie Brooker's idea in the Guardian Guide, how about some ten word album reviews in the form of haikus. Here's mine for 'Kid A':

indie whingers discover dance we laugh they are still moaning

― Andrew L, Monday, 17 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

That's not a haiku.

― Melissa W, Monday, 17 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

It might've been if the goddamm formatting had worked...

― Andrew L, Monday, 17 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Haikus have 17 syllables, that had only 15. And no matter what format you put it in, that would not be 5-7-5.

― Melissa W, Monday, 17 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

The 7-5-7 form is the curse of the haiku.

― Tom, Monday, 17 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

you forgot about the two silent spaces that count as consonants

― Geoff, Monday, 17 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

What about the sweeper? (mark attempts football joke)

― mark s, Monday, 17 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Just when you thought Plato Dinner was as low as Mark could get

― Ronan, Monday, 17 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

No sweeper, Mark. It's a flat back 7. George Graham must be the manager.

― Dr. C, Monday, 17 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Cibo Matto, Stereotype A:
Main artistic advancement here: the songs aren't all about food.

― M. Matos, Monday, 17 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

The Standing On Tables' first record. 12 words, but a haiku.

Oh, what a surprise
Emily's got a new band
Does this one exist?
(The answer is unusually yes- hurrah. Although I have vowed to only play live and never release a record- hurrah says everyone else.)

― emil.y, Monday, 17 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

The Beatles, Sgt. Pepper:
Many advances here, like a pop Stravinsky or psychedelic Bernstein.

― dleone, Tuesday, 18 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Back For The First Time by Ludacris: "Sounds retarded, but so sharp that it's obviously an act."

― Robin Carmody, Tuesday, 18 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

three weeks pass...

Not all of these are exactly 10 words, but they all fit the spirit of brevity:

The Dismemberment Plan, _Emergency & I_: Yet again, the Talking Heads spawn an unlikely revolution.

Handsome Boy Modeling School, _So, How's Your Girl?_: MC's put in place: It's the producers' time to shine.

Ash, _Free All Angels_: Has-beens follow trends; they're better than Sum 41, anyway.

Firesign Theater, _Don't Crush That Dwarf, Hand Me The Pliers_: Pot-smoking pranksters show alarming brilliance; Orwell, move over.

Del Tha Funky Homosapien, _No Need For Alarm_: Videogaming 22-year-old vents anger at world, inspires movement.

Dr. John _Gris Gris_: Alternate world: George Clinton fueled by voodoo, not drugs.

The Stones Roses, _Second Coming_: Dancy popsters escape from fog of reverb and crank up amps.

Rick Wright, _Wet Dream_: Talented sideman and collaborator embarasses himself before the world.

Emerson, Lake & Palmer, _Tarkus_: It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.

The Watch, _Ghost_: Sample lyrics: "You were the flower, on the asphalt, watching her ankles." Steely Dan, _Can't Buy A Thrill_: The calm before the muzak.

Somebody stop me! It's just too damn easy.

― Jack Redelfs, Wednesday, 10 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

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