I'll teach you how to stunt

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1. Drive around in a $155,000 car while smoking a cigar, wearing a suit, blasting Husker Du and Fugazi.

2. Walk into Zulu records wearing an Adidas velour two-piece and clear-lens chachi sunglasses with extreme BBQ chicken breath and proceed to school a flabbergasted employee on indie rock.

3. Start playing the Clientele's first record while all your hip-hop friends are doing coke and repeatedly assure them that "there's this GODLY break in like a few minutes" "trust me, it's coming up" "oh no, wait, wrong track. No, don't touch it! It's this track, I swear!" for the entire record.

Add.

― LC, Friday, 5 March 2004 00:13 (twenty-one years ago)

4. Sit in an internet cafe sipping the froth from a decaf soy peppermint latte and post to an internet forum as "SKULLCRUSHER" while the puerto rican stripper sat in your lap remains transfixed by the bling from your 50-carat pinkie ring.

― @d@ml (nordicskilla), Friday, 5 March 2004 00:20 (twenty-one years ago)

5. Buy up all the Pixies tickets for your town and scalp them in the classified section of Murder Dog.

― @d@ml (nordicskilla), Friday, 5 March 2004 00:22 (twenty-one years ago)

hahaha

― LC, Friday, 5 March 2004 00:23 (twenty-one years ago)

6.
http://www.sportsposterwarehouse.com/warehouse/knievel99pg-1.jpg

― JaXoN (JasonD), Friday, 5 March 2004 00:25 (twenty-one years ago)

this is funny...why?

― strongo hulkington (dubplatestyle), Friday, 5 March 2004 00:25 (twenty-one years ago)

It's funny because we all miss Ian Curtis more than Biggie Smalls, we just don't know it yet.

― @d@ml (nordicskilla), Friday, 5 March 2004 00:26 (twenty-one years ago)

Tupac died on my 15th birthday. I'm not joking.

― LC, Friday, 5 March 2004 00:28 (twenty-one years ago)

Is that number 7?

― @d@ml (nordicskilla), Friday, 5 March 2004 00:29 (twenty-one years ago)

Fuuuuuck!!!

― LC, Friday, 5 March 2004 00:30 (twenty-one years ago)

It's funny, Strongo, because numbers 1, 2, and 7 are real.

― LC, Friday, 5 March 2004 00:33 (twenty-one years ago)

me liked @d@m's stunt!

― t\'\'t (t\'\'t), Friday, 5 March 2004 00:34 (twenty-one years ago)

8. http://www.leisuresuit.net/Webzine/cont_grf/pavement10.gif

― morris pavilion (samjeff), Friday, 5 March 2004 00:39 (twenty-one years ago)

9. Pimp Chan Marshall.

― @d@ml (nordicskilla), Friday, 5 March 2004 00:45 (twenty-one years ago)

9. Pimp Chan Marshall.
-- @d@ml (nordicskill...), March 5th, 2004.

MUGSHOTS:

Week one:

Week two:

Week three:

Week four:

― LC, Friday, 5 March 2004 03:10 (twenty-one years ago)

10. ridicule someone for being an "internet thug" in a message board post

― Al (sitcom), Friday, 5 March 2004 03:35 (twenty-one years ago)

11. secretly sneak aesop rock's "9-5er's anthem" in the middle of a biggie/jigga/pac/50 nonstop mp3 tracklist anthem mix that your roommates listen to when they get stoned and play Madden and then crack up when the spoken word chorus comes in at 3:01, time stops and everybody's buzz gets totally harshed.

― Forksclovetofu (Forksclovetofu), Friday, 5 March 2004 03:59 (twenty-one years ago)

the mugshots series: greatness

― Aaron A., Friday, 5 March 2004 04:05 (twenty-one years ago)

12. slip a couple Cex tracks into a mixtape full of Roc-a-fella shit

― Al (sitcom), Friday, 5 March 2004 04:07 (twenty-one years ago)

Be Barbara Manning and take a night job at Coconuts cuz no one buys your records.

― Aaron A., Friday, 5 March 2004 04:11 (twenty-one years ago)

Post at the Fake Matador BBS when you are in actuality a Real Matador

― Aaron A., Friday, 5 March 2004 05:27 (twenty-one years ago)

Be mean to Barbara Manning.

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Friday, 5 March 2004 05:29 (twenty-one years ago)

i hurt for mankind.

― Sterling Clover (s_clover), Friday, 5 March 2004 06:15 (twenty-one years ago)

but nordics are funny i'll grant.

― Sterling Clover (s_clover), Friday, 5 March 2004 06:16 (twenty-one years ago)

Stand in the middle of your suburban backyard in a tutu, sunglasses, and arm-length fingerless gloves, shouting "Piss off!" at passing aircraft.

― the music mole (colin s barrow), Friday, 5 March 2004 06:17 (twenty-one years ago)

This is already my favourite ever thread.

― the music mole (colin s barrow), Friday, 5 March 2004 06:18 (twenty-one years ago)

Get on a train wearing a zoot suit and sunglasses, with a boombox on each shoulder, at excruciating volume, one playing Merzbow and the other playing James Brown Live At The Appollo. When anyone complains, shout back at them, "Sorry mate? I can't hear you."

― the music mole (colin s barrow), Friday, 5 March 2004 06:25 (twenty-one years ago)

I've said it before, I'll say it again: Gremlin on 22s.

― Nate in ST.P (natedetritus), Friday, 5 March 2004 06:27 (twenty-one years ago)

be Mike D except now with a huge steroid-engorged neck, fill out a job application at Urban Outfitters, work there one day, "pretend" to discover that stuff they sell there is ethnically insensitive, quit whilst going stark raving mad and trashing the joint (make sure to say "I'll pay for it all! the Mike stands for Money and the D is for Diamonds, motherfuckers"!), and come back for the next few days leading non-violent sit-ins and chanting sessions to force them to change their ways. also, get laid with some college girls who share your pain, get Ricky Powell to take pictures of it, and mail them to Laura Bush.

― Begs2Differ (Begs2Differ), Friday, 5 March 2004 06:33 (twenty-one years ago)

Shoplift your grandkids' Christmas presents

― Aaron A., Friday, 5 March 2004 06:37 (twenty-one years ago)

have the magic stick, call people wankstas, get shot nine times, drive yourself to the hospital. when you get there make sure people call you MR. knotts. you're a star, BE a star.

― Begs2Differ (Begs2Differ), Friday, 5 March 2004 06:41 (twenty-one years ago)

i hurt for mankind.
-- Sterling Clover (s_clove...), March 5th, 2004.

Oh RILLY? Kool, man.

― LC, Friday, 5 March 2004 08:54 (twenty-one years ago)

its the chicken-breath that i found particularly outre.

― Sterling Clover (s_clover), Friday, 5 March 2004 14:25 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.kode-fu.com/shame/images/2002_11/rooney.jpg

"he was absent...nine times"

― Donna Brown (Donna Brown), Friday, 5 March 2004 15:46 (twenty-one years ago)

one year passes...

This was Le Coq?

― adamrl (nordicskilla), Tuesday, 10 January 2006 16:20 (twenty years ago)

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