Lenny Kravitz asks you to read between the lines

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From Rolling Stones "immortals" issue:

on John Lennon,
"There was this guy who was going to manage me; when he heard the raw tapes of my early songs, like 'Be', he said, 'Have you ever heard John Lennon's Plastic Ono Band? Because your stuff sounds like him.

"So, I bought Plastic Ono Band, and I listened to it over and over for months. It's a monumental work of genius."

― dleone (dleone), Friday, 9 April 2004 01:30 (twenty-one years ago)

You mean...

Premise #1: Somebody said my songs sounded like Lennon circa Plastic Ono Band.
Premise #2: Plastic Ono Band is a monumental work of genius.
Conclustion: My songs are a monumental work of genius.

― Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Friday, 9 April 2004 01:36 (twenty-one years ago)

Arrgh, fuck. Spelled "conclusion" wrong.

― Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Friday, 9 April 2004 01:37 (twenty-one years ago)

If I had a conclustion I might think that too though.

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Friday, 9 April 2004 01:38 (twenty-one years ago)

Premise #1: Somebody said my songs sounded like Lennon circa Plastic Ono Band.
Premise #2: Plastic Ono Band is a monumental work of genius.
Conclusion: Lenny Kravitz has never heard of "pillow talk."

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Friday, 9 April 2004 01:43 (twenty-one years ago)

Premise #1: Prospective manager said my songs sounded like Lennon circa Plastic Ono Band.
Premise #2: Plastic Ono Band is a monumental work of genius.
Conclusion: Prospective managers will say anything.

― Elvis Telecom (Chris Barrus), Friday, 9 April 2004 01:46 (twenty-one years ago)

really, one of about 5 or 6 musicians that ought to be literally killed.

― roger adultery (roger adultery), Friday, 9 April 2004 02:08 (twenty-one years ago)

Premise #1: "Somebody said my songs sounded like Lennon circa Plastic Ono Band ".
Premise #2: " Plastic Ono Band is a monumental work of genius".
Conclusion: Lenny Kravitz unable to distinguish prospective manager from EMI legal staff.

― jazz odysseus, Friday, 9 April 2004 02:23 (twenty-one years ago)

Don't forget that Lenny rocked Gates and the MSN 8: 'It's Better With the Butterfly' launch event last year:
http://www.tcf.net/kravitz.html

― 57 7th (calstars), Friday, 9 April 2004 04:09 (twenty-one years ago)

"Really, one of about 5 or 6 musicians that ought to be literally killed."

That "Mr. Cab Driver" song was pretty good, though

― Tim Ellison, Friday, 9 April 2004 04:22 (twenty-one years ago)

Oh come now! I can think of a lot more than 5 or 6 musicians who ought to be killed, though I'll concede that Lenny Kravitz is damn near the top of the list. Maybe at the tippy-top. OK. Yes. You are right. He is at the toppermost of the killing tree. By god, he's earned it.

You too can think of any more than a half dozen musicians who ought to be literally killed if you close your eyes and think real real hard. Try it. Don't be afraid.

― Johnny Ace, Friday, 9 April 2004 06:44 (twenty-one years ago)

Johnny, you had a lot of balls man. What a way to go out.

― Broheems (diamond), Friday, 9 April 2004 06:46 (twenty-one years ago)

Premise #1: Somebody said my songs sounded like Lennon circa Plastic Ono Band.
Premise #2: Plastic Ono Band is a monumental work of genius.
Conclustion: John Lennon must have copied my songs while time-travelling.

― Baravelli. (Jake Proudlock), Friday, 9 April 2004 07:37 (twenty-one years ago)

I don't mind Kravitz (ducks hail of rocks). I like the latest single, though admittedly he spoils it when he comes in. I like the opening bit with a different singer - you can dance round the room to it.

― Baravelli. (Jake Proudlock), Friday, 9 April 2004 07:38 (twenty-one years ago)

Lenny Kravitz is very cute and therefore should not be killed until I can have sex with him.

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Friday, 9 April 2004 07:53 (twenty-one years ago)

What, too good for necrophilia?

― oops (Oops), Friday, 9 April 2004 08:25 (twenty-one years ago)

Did any one see that Mick Jagger documentary where he visits Lenny Kravitz? Lenny has the cool rock star house - all decked out in red leather- and when he makes Mick a cup of tea, he puts a paper doily down. Bless!

― Bob Six (bobbysix), Friday, 9 April 2004 08:55 (twenty-one years ago)

-"Lenny Kravitz asks you to read between the lines"
-"Who is he, some editor of a soviet literary mag or something?"

― t\'\'t (t\'\'t), Friday, 9 April 2004 09:13 (twenty-one years ago)

In the morning he'll forget you all.

― Ally C (Ally C), Friday, 9 April 2004 10:11 (twenty-one years ago)

worst rockstar ever.

― RJG (RJG), Friday, 9 April 2004 10:18 (twenty-one years ago)

That's for sure.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 9 April 2004 11:56 (twenty-one years ago)

dude: chad kroeger

― strongo hulkington (dubplatestyle), Friday, 9 April 2004 11:57 (twenty-one years ago)

DUDE: scott stapp

― strongo hulkington (dubplatestyle), Friday, 9 April 2004 11:57 (twenty-one years ago)

but will roger and jay kill them too?

― Julio Desouza (jdesouza), Friday, 9 April 2004 12:05 (twenty-one years ago)

scott stapp and chad kroeger deserve bloody alex in nyc style disembowelment far more than lenny kravitz. and i HATE lenny kravitz.

― strongo hulkington (dubplatestyle), Friday, 9 April 2004 12:07 (twenty-one years ago)

they are not famous, completely on their own merit, like lenny is.

― RJG (RJG), Friday, 9 April 2004 12:47 (twenty-one years ago)

come to america

― strongo hulkington (dubplatestyle), Friday, 9 April 2004 12:52 (twenty-one years ago)

no, you know what I mean.

chad and scott are in bands, aren't they? lenny is LENNY is lenny and he's lenny.

― RJG (RJG), Friday, 9 April 2004 12:53 (twenty-one years ago)

well yeah, true.

― strongo hulkington (dubplatestyle), Friday, 9 April 2004 12:54 (twenty-one years ago)

i dunno, something about chad kroeger's face just fucks me off in a way that lenny kravitz never could

― strongo hulkington (dubplatestyle), Friday, 9 April 2004 12:54 (twenty-one years ago)

but, yeah, you never hear about chad or scott, over here, really. or lenny, really, haha. or I don't. still.

― RJG (RJG), Friday, 9 April 2004 12:56 (twenty-one years ago)

Alex, he's very short.

Lenny is going to be at JAZZ FEST in New Orleans. I'm going to try very hard to not hear him at all (although, um, if Cindy Blackman is playing drums, I'm going to try very hard to go backstage).

― Jordan (Jordan), Friday, 9 April 2004 13:22 (twenty-one years ago)

The main difference between Kravitz & Stapp et al = the Kravitz narcissism.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Friday, 9 April 2004 13:37 (twenty-one years ago)

And the huge psychadelic mosaic he had put in his living room at great cost, only to have it removed when it started giving him migraines. Tosspiece.

― Lynskey (Lynskey), Friday, 9 April 2004 13:58 (twenty-one years ago)

hahahaha classic

― stockholm cindy (Jody Beth Rosen), Friday, 9 April 2004 13:59 (twenty-one years ago)

I don't understand the Kravitz hate. To me, he's no worse than Bryan Adams, Jon Cougar Mellencamp, or Tom Petty - all of whom have their moments.

― o. nate (onate), Friday, 9 April 2004 14:11 (twenty-one years ago)

I agree that he has his moments. Totally not worth it though. The sight of him makes me hateful.

― Sonny A. (Keiko), Friday, 9 April 2004 14:25 (twenty-one years ago)

The sight of him still makes me horny.

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Friday, 9 April 2004 16:17 (twenty-one years ago)

first of all, their abhorrent music aside, I could see having a beer with Chad Kroeger (the guy from Nickelback, right?) or Scott Stapp. All I think of when I think about Lenny Kravitz is some photo of him a few years ago in Spin or something where he had a dude that followed him around carrying an umbrella over him to block the precious sissy the sun. What a fucking bitchass.

Rock stars (and Mr Kravitz so dearly wants to be one) are supposed to at least have a SENSE of coolness and danger about them. Kravitz probably gets pedicures. If I ever meet him I'm totally punching him in the face

Putting him in the same class with Petty, the Coog, or even Brayn Adams is just stupid

― roger adultery (roger adultery), Friday, 9 April 2004 17:21 (twenty-one years ago)

Pedicures ARE dangerous! There is a real risk of hepatitus!?!?

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Friday, 9 April 2004 17:28 (twenty-one years ago)

Actually the one thing I found appealing when I did see him in New Orleans was that the people he was hanging out with seemed like very regular folks, not rock star types at all.

He is very short though.

― Jordan (Jordan), Friday, 9 April 2004 17:30 (twenty-one years ago)

Iggy Pop is like 5'1.

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Friday, 9 April 2004 17:31 (twenty-one years ago)

And bored!

― jazz odysseus, Friday, 9 April 2004 17:56 (twenty-one years ago)

the best Kravitz story is still the one that Mudhoney told in an interview about a decade or so ago. Mudhoney were apparently right on the tail of Kravitz's scheduled European tour, at mostly the same venues at that, just by coincidence. So Mudhoney decided to have fun with this and put fake Kravitz graffiti around the venues they played saying things like "We rocked you and love you, Berlin.. Kravitz" or just faux-asinine things like that.

Apparently, Kravitz caught wind of these pranks and left a messenger graffiti to Mudhoney at a venue saying something to the effect of "don't think i don't know the shit your're pulling. once you're caught, me and my homeys will take care of you." Mudhoney were falling off their asses laughing at the "me and my homeys" part.

― donut bitch (donut), Friday, 9 April 2004 18:12 (twenty-one years ago)

This was in an NME or Melody Maker interview circa 1992 or 1993 I believe... so those of you with the stashes, feel free to confirm.

― donut bitch (donut), Friday, 9 April 2004 18:19 (twenty-one years ago)

I believe Iggy is exactly (or should that be Igzactly) 5'1", hence his song, "5'1"".

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Saturday, 10 April 2004 02:21 (twenty-one years ago)

I believe that listening to new Iggy Pop albums is exactly like suffering.

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Saturday, 10 April 2004 02:27 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.bbc.co.uk/southampton/footballfirst/scrapbook/images/miller_mugshot_150.jpg

He asked me to tell you that he confirms.

― jazz odysseus, Saturday, 10 April 2004 02:31 (twenty-one years ago)

There's some kind of twisted kinky shit going on between the two Alexs here.

― Patrick Kinghorn, Saturday, 10 April 2004 02:34 (twenty-one years ago)

4 Alex in NYC 613 (8)
5 Alex in SF 519 (3)

― @d@ml (nordicskilla), Saturday, 10 April 2004 02:37 (twenty-one years ago)

Geez fuck that's scary. I used to never place that high. I'm going out now.

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Saturday, 10 April 2004 02:44 (twenty-one years ago)

I think I've played Ig's new one (Skull Ring) exactly once and once only, so I'm afraid I can't weigh in on this debate. I'll say this though -- I'd rather listen to Iggy Pop getting a colonoscopy than hear a note out of Lenny Kravitz.e

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Saturday, 10 April 2004 02:51 (twenty-one years ago)

"It Ain't Over Til it's Over" is one of my three favorite songs of all time.

― @d@ml (nordicskilla), Saturday, 10 April 2004 16:02 (twenty-one years ago)

The rest can suck it, though.

― @d@ml (nordicskilla), Saturday, 10 April 2004 16:02 (twenty-one years ago)

Yeah, I just heard "It Ain't Over Til It's Over" last night and realized how great it was.

Also, I once had some falafel at a place in Paris that advertises itself as Lenny Kravitz's favorite falafel place in the world. And I have to say, it was pretty good falafel.

― jaymc (jaymc), Saturday, 10 April 2004 16:09 (twenty-one years ago)

Well, yeah, we've established the shitty musician/great food connection via Ben & Jerry's flavors... ("One Sweet Whirled" is heaven on earth, the band that it's in honor of, well....)

― donut bitch (donut), Saturday, 10 April 2004 16:14 (twenty-one years ago)

all you bitter fucks are just jealous because of how lenny looks. if he looked like, i dont know, thom yorke, youd probably be praising him.

― yeahyeahyeah (yeahyeahyeah), Monday, 12 April 2004 15:48 (twenty-one years ago)

HYSTERICS

― teeny (teeny), Monday, 12 April 2004 15:55 (twenty-one years ago)

Alternate conclusion: Lenny Kravitz actually heard POB before he started writing music and is an f'n liar.

― J (Jay), Monday, 12 April 2004 15:57 (twenty-one years ago)

Teeny said it all right there.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 12 April 2004 16:24 (twenty-one years ago)

Seen Kravitz's hair lately? Ain't nothing to be jealous of there, my friend.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Monday, 12 April 2004 16:41 (twenty-one years ago)

"Fly Away" is one of the worst songs ever written, if you can even call it a song.

― shookout (shookout), Monday, 12 April 2004 16:52 (twenty-one years ago)

Hahahahahaha

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Monday, 12 April 2004 17:21 (twenty-one years ago)

one of Yoko Ono's lowest moments was her hanging out with Kravitz just after the start of the Gulf War doing some weird funky anti-war protest circle dance to "Give Peace A Chance", initiated by Kravitz, which was being shown on MTV. I never forgave Lenny for making her do that...

(which is irrational to be sure, as surely Ono would have initiated it herself, but I just need more irrational reasons to hate on Lenny, basically. It's good for the soul.)

― donut bitch (donut), Monday, 12 April 2004 17:25 (twenty-one years ago)

I'll tell you why I hate on Lenny: back in '88 or '89, I was living in Indianapolis Indiana and ran into Kravitz in the guitar shop where I used to waste a lot of time. He was opening for Tom Petty on Petty's 'Full Moon Fever' tour. I gave Kravitz and his new Marshall amp a ride back to his hotel, and also drove him around looking for a head shop so he could buy a pipe, which we finally located at Karma Records He thanked me and said he'd leave two tickets. My brother and I go the venue, no tickets. Bastid!

― shookout (shookout), Monday, 12 April 2004 17:31 (twenty-one years ago)

He's an ugly, weird looking man.

His music sucks, and I haven't been able to avoid all my life.

He seems like a real wanker.

What other reasons are necessary to hate him?

― Sasha (sgh), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 01:05 (twenty-one years ago)

Sasha, you've never had sex, have you?

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 01:15 (twenty-one years ago)

Not with anyone remotely resembling Lenny Kravitz, no.

― Sasha (sgh), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 01:45 (twenty-one years ago)

Yeah you see, I meant with humans.

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 01:49 (twenty-one years ago)

Are you suggesting, Alex, that listening to Lenny Kravitz is like experiencing great sex or something?

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 01:50 (twenty-one years ago)

No, I'm suggesting that thinking ugliness is a good reason for hating someone is the realm of pasty little virgins.

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 01:53 (twenty-one years ago)

I can deal with the few singles I heard. I don't even mind the blatant appropriation of the Beatles, and of the Nine-Inch-Nails-but-with-afros aesthetic in one of his videos. But the man has a persona of a pretentious prick. (and while I think he's certainly physically unappealing, that's not really an issue)

And sorry Alex (in SF), but I think it's perfectly possible to get laid and loathe Lenny Kravitz at the same time.

― donut bitch (donut), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 01:56 (twenty-one years ago)

Lenny Kravitz is God. And by "God" I mean "not very good".

― latebloomer (latebloomer), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 01:56 (twenty-one years ago)

(x-post)Read what I wrote, DB.

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 01:56 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm suggesting that thinking ugliness is a good reason for hating someone is the realm of pasty little virgins.

I thought it was the realm of frat jocks.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 01:59 (twenty-one years ago)

Frat jocks ignore (or are) ugly people. They hate and persecute weak people generally.

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 02:03 (twenty-one years ago)

If Kravitz weren't such a smarmy talentless tool he wouldn't seem so damn ugly!

― stockholm cindy (Jody Beth Rosen), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 02:03 (twenty-one years ago)

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 02:08 (twenty-one years ago)

my post was a full x-post, alex...

― donut bitch (donut), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 02:26 (twenty-one years ago)

I've got no problem with ugly people in general, but Lenny Kravitz is like... circus ugly.

It's just wrong.

― Sasha (sgh), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 03:56 (twenty-one years ago)

Yeah uh huh, but um that still doesn't answer the question of whether are not you are a pasty little sexless freak, does it?

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 04:00 (twenty-one years ago)

??? Um, Alex..? I think the "He's an ugly, weird looking man." line was just the insult said accidentally before the injury. I'm not defending the line, but accusing someone of being a virgin (god forbid) is pretty, um, high school. Sorry.

― donut bitch (donut), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 04:08 (twenty-one years ago)

(like I should talk... but ya know?)

― donut bitch (donut), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 04:09 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm just picking on Sasha because in the entire lifetime of him being on ILX he's never really said anything even remotely civil or decent and so I figure treat kind with kind, ya know. But you're right, I'm acting very high school and I'll stop.

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 04:10 (twenty-one years ago)

he's never really said anything even remotely civil or decent

Er? I dunno, he seems pretty friendly on the various Disco Inferno threads and has specifically thanked me for being the source of the five EP CDR burn which I brought down there, which I thought was nice.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 04:12 (twenty-one years ago)

(I'd say the "real enemy" are the cowardly fucks who will use a temporary one-off fake aliases to make personal attacks, but that's just me. but anyway)

― donut bitch (donut), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 04:14 (twenty-one years ago)

Yeah those folks are lame too. I'll use my own to make personal attacks thank you very much.

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 04:17 (twenty-one years ago)

Fuck Lenny Kravitz! His butchering of The Guess Who's "american woman" is all the reason I need to hate him. thank you, good night.

― chad (chad), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 04:24 (twenty-one years ago)

"How times change," Lenny might be thinking, right now

― DJ Mencap (DJ Mencap), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 07:56 (twenty-one years ago)

I don't think he's ugly (although his current hairstyle is embarassing)...I just think his music is kinda crap. But, y'know, there are certainly worse culprits out there.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 16:32 (twenty-one years ago)

"How times change," Lenny might be thinking, right now

It's more likely he's thinking, "Man, my house still doesn't have enough shag carpeting."

Alex OTM, btw.

― Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 16:35 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.lennykravitz.com/gallery/tour_posters/2.jpg

Doesn't look as bad in this pic....but still.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 16:46 (twenty-one years ago)

Baptism in WHAT?

That said, how appropriate the Stereophonics are on the bill.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 17:53 (twenty-one years ago)

i can't bring myself to hate lenny kravitz!!!

― amateur!st (amateurist), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 17:57 (twenty-one years ago)

i mean, us jewish rock stars must stick together

― amateur!st (amateurist), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 17:57 (twenty-one years ago)

I heard some new song on the radio that way out-Lizzied the last three or whatever Hellacopters albums. It wasn't great by any means, but I don't see why everyone hates the guy so much. All his hits are totally different. An LK best-of would probably be alright.

― Kris (aqueduct), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 18:22 (twenty-one years ago)

Baptism in WHAT?

Tomato paste, apparently.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 18:45 (twenty-one years ago)

An LK best-of would probably be alright.

Err....

http://images.amazon.com/images/P/B00004ZB9D.01.LZZZZZZZ.jpg

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 18:46 (twenty-one years ago)

man, I don't need this thread on my rap sheet

― dleone (dleone), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 19:18 (twenty-one years ago)

one year passes...

And the huge psychadelic mosaic he had put in his living room at great cost, only to have it removed when it started giving him migraines

― Klaus Darko (nordicskilla), Wednesday, 14 December 2005 22:58 (nineteen years ago)

I wouldn't automatically assume his prospective manager was just buttering him up -- I mean ultimately the dude had to actually LIKE Kravitz to want to sign him, or at least think there was something success-worthy about him.

― Abbadavid Berman (Hurting), Thursday, 15 December 2005 04:22 (nineteen years ago)

Plus I actually kinda like Let Love Rule. He wasn't as bad back then.

― Abbadavid Berman (Hurting), Thursday, 15 December 2005 04:22 (nineteen years ago)

Premise #1: "Somebody said my songs sounded like Lennon circa Plastic Ono Band ".
Premise #2: " Plastic Ono Band is a monumental work of genius".
Conclusion: Lenny Kravitz likes his own stuff a very lot.
DisConclusion: Manager may not like the Plastic Ono Band album. Did he become Len's Manager? No he did not.

Further conclusion: Manager thinks Lenny is a copying old rogue.

― mark grout (mark grout), Thursday, 15 December 2005 08:57 (nineteen years ago)

four years pass...

Funny thread

― Nano McPhee (admrl), Thursday, 16 September 2010 06:46 (fourteen years ago)

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